Alaska scout boat

SkipperBud's and Scout Boats want to make your on-the-water experience like no other. With that in mind, Scout Boats continually develops trend-setting, clever designs that bring a modern, sophisticated edge to each boat while also improving performance, comfort and safety. It was 1915 when 'Grandpa' Wooldridge (1896-1986) built his first river boat to make that first-ever float down Oregon's Rogue River. READ MORE ABOUT US From the original pioneers of jet boating comes an explosive and compact concept we are calling the “Scout”! Scout officers and enlisted men shared instructional duties and training was tailored to missions: camoflage, survival skills, security, small unit tactics and marksmanship. The Alaskan is available in a 16, 18, and 20-foot boat and can be a tiller, side console, or even a full windshield on the 18’ and 20’ aluminum fishing boats. Also featured as a premier boat in many Canadian camps, the Lund Alaskan is engineered to get you through anything and everything. Find new and used boats for sale on Boat Trader. Huge range of used private and dealer boats for sale near you. wooldridge boat dealers HOME / DEALERS Please feel free to contact us for detailed information about our products, our limited lifetime hull warranty, boat options, dealer information, for a free color brochure, or to schedule a factory tour. Alaska boat registration summary is a free resource designed to inform the boating public about registration requirements, recording methods, and title search guidelines for the State of Alaska. The data is maintained as an open wiki forum where readers are encouraged to participate by sharing knowledge and experiences with this particular state. The 215 XSF is built on Scout’s revolutionary fuel saving NuV3 hull design, while the deck offers ample standard amenities for everything from serious fishing to comfort cruising. Built with 100% hand-laid fiberglass, the boat boasts a wide comfortable beam of 8’ 6” with an overall length of 21’ 6”. Phone: 907-337-9547. ADDRESS: 3117 Patterson St. Anchorage, Alaska 99504 Boat Finder Pleasure Commercial Fishing Industrial Price Range: -- ALL -- Max. $20,000 $20,000 to $40,000 $40,000 to $60,000 $60,000 to $80,000 $80,000 to $100,000 $100,000 to $150,000 $150,000 to $200,000 $200,000 to $250,000 Above $250,000

Dean Dibblee (Sept. 19, 1936 - May 26, 2020)

2020.06.06 09:00 portlane Dean Dibblee (Sept. 19, 1936 - May 26, 2020)

Dean Kenneth Dibblee
Sept. 19, 1936 - May 26, 2020
Dean Kenneth Dibblee died unexpectedly May 26, 2020 in his home. Dean was born to Vernita and Kenneth Dibblee Sept. 19, 1936 in Hillsboro, Ore.
He graduated from Grant High School in 1954. During his teenage years he achieved Eagle Scout. After high school graduation, he enrolled in Oregon State University and received a bachelor's degree in Food Technology. During college he worked summers in road construction for Bureau of Roads and U.S. Corps. of Engineering as a surveyor. He enlisted in the U.S. Air Force after college and subsequently completed active duty in the Oregon Air National Guard as a Medic.
He worked as a food technologist for the Processed Products Division of the U.S. Department of Agriculture, retiring in 1994.
He married Martha Kontz May 18, 1963. They made their home in Portland, living in their home for 53 years. Dean loved the outdoors and when his children were growing up he took them camping and adventuring, including Disneyland and Yellowstone National Park. The family spent a wonderful vacation in Hawaii where he and Martha SCUBA-dived. He and Martha took a number of trips but his favorites were the small boat cruises to Glacier Bay National Park in Alaska and Baja Mexico. Dean and a college friend adventured in Kenya, Africa, on a wildlife safari. Dean loved his garden and tended it well. He also loved his pets and only last summer lost his Cairn Terrier, Angus Mac Duff.
Surviving Dean is his wife of 57 years, Martha; daughters, Christina (James) Grelle and Susan (Joshua) Blender; sons, Brian (Susanne) and David (Ivonne); sisters, Donna (Thomas) Jones and Doris (Park) Thede; and nine grandchildren.
By request, there will be no service. In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to Sunshine Division Portland Oregon online at: https://sunshinedivision.org/ or by mail to Sunshine Division, 687 N. Thompson Street, Portland, OR 97227.
Please visit Dean's online memorial and guestbook at:
www.wilhelmportlandmemorial.com
Please sign the online guest book at www.oregonlive.com/obits
source: http://obits.oregonlive.com/obituaries/oregon/obituary.aspx?n=dean-kenneth-dibblee&pid=196302976
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2020.03.24 16:05 Texas1971 Carollaisms

Haven’t updated in awhile, but here’s some “light reading” for everyone while we’re locked in. These just crack me up. Enjoy, stay safe and wash up. 🧼 GETITON

Band Names/Rap Stars

Mitt Romney and the One Percenters (ACS)
ManAyz - Rap star (LL)
D'Bagz - Rap star (LL)
Maxi Pad - An all-girl band that knows how to rock (LL)
Dick Tingle - One of the best blues men in the business (Show?)
Lynette and the Lackeys (ACS)
Straw Hat and the Bowties - Jerry Springer's dixieland band who plays at the Knott's Berry Farm Good Time Theater (ACS)
Gut Fluffer (ACS)
Johnny Beaumont and The Legionnaires - All wear matching powder blue tuxedoes (ACS)
Automatic Vaginismus – Great band name (LL)
Dissuade/D’ Suede - Rappeproducer of Kanye/one of Kim's ex beaus (ACS)
Starchy Deuce - Band that should be produced by D' Suede (ACS)
Narthex - (ACS)
Epileptic Declawed Hamster - That is a helluva punk band right there (ACS)
Loretta Lynch - Country singer who sang "Stand By Your Man" (ACS)
The Areolas - Covered an Eagles song in the ‘90s (ACS)
Fleece and Flannel - One of the best lesbian acoustic duos you will ever see (ACS)
3 Chainz - Rap star (ACS)
Blues Squatter - Adam's dad’s band name (ACS)
Tampon Kayak - One of Seattle's greatest, but least heard of indie bands (ACS)
Jizz Grenade (LL)
Dryer Fire - Hot indie band name (ACS)
Iranian Revolutionary Guard - Prince's backup band (ACS)
Rape Kit - Name of Adam's band from high school (ACS)
Nog Bong - A band Adam was in in high school (ACS)
Bum Blazer – Adam’s band in high school (ACS)
White Trash Kimchi - Another good band name (Bald Bryan) (ACS)
White Noise - Adam's rap name (ADS)
Promethazine - Lil Wayne's sister (ADS)
Light Rail - Great Rap name (ADS)
Danny In The Joint - Good indie band name (ACS)
Anal Cleft - One of the worst reggae singers to leave Jamaica (ACS)
Anal Cleft and the Taints - Great reggae group (ACS)
MEL-ROL - One of The Spice Girls (AOTH)
D'bris - Great Rap name (ACS)
Cisgender - A militant female rapper....for the ladies (ACS)
Krav Maga (1) - Country singing Jew (ACS)
Lynette and Paulette - Sounds like a singing duo from the 60's (RD)
Nuts In The Sink - Name of Ray’s new band (Ray) (AOTH)
SubDude - Pete Holmes' rap name (ACS)
Ray And The Enemas - Blues singer and his backup band (ADS)
Yakov Crutchfield - He has a show in Branson (ADS)
Mac 18 - Adam’s favorite rapper (RD)
Tremble Lean – Adam’s rap name (ACBSL)
Sticker Back – Worst band out of Canada ever (ACS)
Pennywise and Pound Foolish - A band from the ‘90's (RD)
Strawberry Shortcake's Neti Pot - Great band name (Twitter)
Puffy Elon Musk - Worst rapper ever (ACS)
Pantera Club at Laguna Seca (Twitter)
Savage Body Attack - New wave romantic band Ace was in when he was 19 (FBL)
Jumping Jazzy Jews - Jeff Goldblum's jazz band (ACS)
Snore Cherry - Great band name (ACS)
Pat Benatard - Pat Benatar cover band (ACS)
Rancid Nuts - Good band name (ACS)
Gary And The Knotholes - Good band name (AOTH)
Tampon Canoe - Good indie band (ACS)
One Erection - A good boy band (ACS)
Flushin' Dew - A good country duo (ACS)
Armo Jeweler - Great band name (RD)
Radon - (Lynette thinks) there a Whitesnake cover-band (ACS)
The Taste Of Ace - Great band name (ACS)
King Grape and the Raisinettes (GS)
Concord Grape and the Raisinettes (GS)
Gary Taco - Love that band (ACS)
The Silence Breakers (2) - Good punk band (Gina) (ACS)
Daddy’s Got A Dually – Good country song (ACS)
Dip Curtain - Good indie band (ACS)
Crystal Lobbyists - Sounds like a great techno band (ACS)
Narcissistic Monk -Great indie band (GS)
Sporty Prius - Worst of the Spice Girls (ACS)
Laden and Bravado - 70s duo who opened for Seals n Crofts (ACS)
The Bouncers - great band name (ACS)
Hurry up and make sense (1) - a good talking heads album (ACS)
Appropriate Sombrero - Maxapada’s next band name (Bryan) (ACS)
Flirtatious Contrail - great rap name (GS)
Jack Johnson - Guy from The White Stripes aka The Black Stripes (ACS)
Sophistry - A great Carol King album (ADS)

Song Titles

Meatless Mondays - Horrible Bangles song (Show?)
Measles and Commuter Trains - Worst Christmas song ever (ACS)
White Guys Be Ownin' Everything - Adam's next hit (ACS)
Blood On The Grout - John Cougar Mellencamp song (ACS)
No Blood In The Peckeroo - Good John Cougar song (ACS)
Mellen's Gold - A three disc box set of nothing but John Cougar Mellencamp hits (ACS)
Freaks, Retards and Jews - Not a Cher song (ACS)
Pedophile Cops - Good Cheap Trick song (ACS)
Pig Anus Soup - Favorite Rolling Stones album (Bryan) (ACS)
That Dog Don’t Mess With Olga and Natalia Don’t Spit No Mo’ - Sounds like a Mississippi Delta blues song (Bryan) (ACS)
Goggles Are For Pussies - Trace Adkins' number one hit (ACAFBSL)
Whistle While You Masturbate - The lost Disney song aka "Whistle While You Jerk" (ACS)
12 Pack & Dick's Hard - Name of Adam's new album (Gina) (ACS)
Blood and Soil - A good Smithereens song (ACS)
Pina Colada in Amsterdam - Worst Jimmy Buffet song ever (ACS)
Tough Times In The City - Great Nick Gilder song (ACS)
I've Got A Hamster In My Scrotum And He's Looking For His Keys - That's a good country song (ACS)
Gay Hitler -Great Elvis Costello song (ACS)
Tard On The Tool Shed - Good Mellenamp song (AOTH)
Condo in Redondo - Sublime song (ADS)
Animoji - Band that sung "Obsession" (ACS)
People Who Have Lost People - Worst Barbara Streisand song ever (ACS)
Tilted Heart - Great Tammy Wynette song (ADS)
Yoga wood - Great Beatles song (ACS)
Anal cleft - Song from the Sound of Music (ACS)
Morgue Mode - Sounds like a guy from Iceland who is a DJ (ACS)
I’ve got a Saturday and two friends - great country song (Gina) (ACS)
Recipe for Misery (2) - Title of the next Guns N Roses album (ACS)
Circling Back To Baldwin - Good name for a country song (ACS)
Keistered in Winnipeg - (Bald’s) favorite Willie Nelson song (ACS)
Anal ipecac - Good indie band (ACS)
2 Tits and a Pulse - Ace likes that Beck song (Bryan/Adam) (ACS)

Football Players/Athletes/Teams:

Legs Akimbo - Wide Receiver (ACS)
Feral Katz - Nose Tackle (ACS)
L' Brarian Booker - Wide Receiver (ACS)
Oscar Buzz - Linebacker (ACS)
DeVigorous Lover - Wide Receiver (ACS)
Nadir Zenith - Placekicker (ACS)
DeGluten Free - Offensive Lineman (ACS)
Tangy Mango - Fullback (ACS)
N'Farious Plan - (position?) (ACS)
Modular Holmes - (position?) (ACS)
Fortuitous Bounce - Safety (ACS)
Operatin' Thetan - (ACS) Quarterback for the Washington Redskins (ACS)
Minority Banks - HOF OLB who died tragically in a car wreck shortly after his HOF induction, a natural athlete, he played option QB in college along with being a stand out member of the track team, and in high school he was captain of the basketball team. Survived by his twin brother Majority Banks, who also played in the league, and daughter Recuser Banks who many believe was the best athlete in the family (ACS)
Coach Platitude - "Take a knee son...helmet's not a chair" (ACS)
Glendora Bevmo - Mother of DeVigorous Lover and L' Brarian Booker (different fathers, of course) (ACS)
Marshall Law - (Allison) (ACS)
Orlando Ceeworld - (position?) (ACS)
Du Vatine - (position?) (Show?)
Raja Slate - Super fast wide-out out of Marshall via LSU (AOTH)
Moe Greene - Great corner for the Washington Redskins in the 80’s (ACS)
Bronx Defenders - Sounds like a AAA hockey team (RD)
Medical Error - Slipped in the draft due to a video being released just prior (ACS)
Homeo Stasis (position?) (ACS)
Capybara - The greatest name for a major league skipper (ACS)
Ejaxico Johnson (position?) (ACS)
Radiant Barrier vs. Attic Fan - The worst WWE matchup ever to grace the stage (AOTH)
Bamboo Brick - one of the greatest mixed martial artists on the planet (AOTH)
Dexter Methorphan - He did not participate in the combines, but his coaches say he can run a 4.3 (Twitter)
Bob Jacuzzi - Great point guard for the Celtics aka "THE COOZE" (ACS)
Shame Negation - Picked to leave Clemson early and go very early in the draft this year. (ADS)
Entertainment Crackers - Another name for the Washington Generals ACS
Hardibacker - Good name for an inside backer (ACS)
Osmosis - Black dude. Forward for the Knicks who might or might not have been traded (ADS)
Onus Wilson - NFL draftee (ACS)
World Be Mine - Adam’s new basketball name (ACS)
LBJ - Worst Mexican wrestler name ever (ADS)
Cold stone Steve Austin - Can’t wrestle on hot days. Tag team partners with the Klondike twins (GS)
Cicely Tyson - Greatest Italian boxer of all time. (ADS)

Porn Star Names/Terms/Gay Code:

Spoodini - (LL)
Rocky Stucco - (AOTH)
No Can Doo - Backdoor anal queen of China (ACS)
Kristallnacht - Worst porn star name in the business (ACS)
Madison Avenue (I am Rappaport Podcast)
Hero Du Jour (I am Rappaport Podcast)
Kindle Fire (ACS)
Jackson Hole - Gay porn actor (ACS)
Col. Duke Lacrosse - Adam's porn name (LL)
Duke Circumference - Adam's gay porn name (ACS)
Rich Data - Gay porn actor (Show?)
Tom Foolery - Gay porn actor (Show?)
Honey Dijon - Great porn star name (Show?)
Aids Machete - One of Adam's gay porn names. "Very short stint, I only did 2 weeks with that name, so it was like 41 movies." (ACS)
Bryce Canyon - Great gay porn name (ACS)
The Italian Coastguard - A gay move. "Let me just start with basic anal, then I'll slide into the Italian Coast Guard." (ACS)
Tetanus Gym - Good gay porn name "Who you working with?" "Tetanus Gym." "Oh boy, make sure you're on top" (ACS)
Shared A Back Fence - gay slang (ACS)
Mea Culpa - Adam's porn name (ACS)
Hand Twins - Gay code (ACS)
Backscatter - Porn technology (PM)
Cajun Tree Climber - Gay code (AOTH)
Snow Blower- Gay code (AOTH)
Stump Grinder - Gay code (AOTH)
Tumbler And Coaster - Adam's gay slang replacement for "top and bottom" (PM)
Go For A Bike Ride - Gay code (ACS)
Artie Fartie - Adam's porn name from the 80's (ACS)
Road Island Ray - Ray's porn name (AOTH)
38KKK -A type of porn that comes out of Kentucky (ACS)
Tech Screw - A dirty website for geeks (ACS)
Bearvalanche - Worst gay move ever (ACS)
Wacked Off Pieces Of Cactus - Gay code for gay rough trade (ACS)
Brad Nail - Good gay porn name (ADS)
Lightning Rod - Good gay porn name for Milo Yiannopplous (ADS)
Milk Barn - Another name for Adam's bathroom sink (ACS)
Meat Thievery - That's just good gay code (ACS)
Hairy Shin - Adam's gay porn name (ACS)
Asian Persuasion - Sounds like a good name for a porn series Asian persuasion 16 (ACS)
Cock Holster - Good movie series, cock holster 14 (ACS)
Celebrity Du Jour - Great porn name (ACS)
Europol - Another great porn name (ACS)
Roy Wood - Adam's gay porn name (ACS)
Tank slapper - Gay slang (Gina) (ACS)
Porch Pirate - Gay term (ACS)
Mad Chuck - The world's worst name for a gay porn star (AOTH)
Sweat lodge - Gay code (ACS)
The L.A. Underground - Sounds like a gay bar (M&J)
Skin and grin - Gay slang (ACS)
Rear Admiral - The name of one of the best bars on west side (ACS)
Loaded for bear - Now a gay term (GS)
Fruit Of The Year - A porn Dave (Dameshek) starred in (ACS)
The Lebanese Comedian - Ace's favorite sex position (ACS)
Cockout - When a gay guy doesn't try very hard (ACS)
Margana Wood - Porn name (ACS)
Hugh Bris - Porn star (RD)
Matte Clear - Fondalier’s gay porn name (AOTH)
Palatial Estates – A good 80’s fake tittie porn name (AOTH)
Cokie Roberts - Great porn name (ACS)
Armenian Christmas - An unspeakable sexual act in prison. "Johnny ratted out the white supremacists to the warden, so they gave him an Armenian Christmas" (Show?)
Ride The Pine - Gay slang (ADS)
Meet Gaze - Gay slang (ACS)
Asshole Rider - Gay slang (ACS)
Cash Widedick - Ace's porn name if you can call an apple a honey crisp. (ACS)
Shanda Lear - Great stripper name (Gina) (ACS)
Fiery Cherry - Good porn name (ACS)
Jerk the wheel - Code for masturbation (ACS)
Giddyup Titties - Gina’s porn name (Gina) (ACS)
French astronaut - Great gay slang (ACS)
Mr Bandera - gay code (ACS)
Beefmato/Clamato - sounds like names of venerial diseases (ACS)
Spanner - Australian gay code (ACS)
Rocky tenure - Adam’s gay porn name (ACS)
The End Game - One of Stormy Daniels movie titles (RD)
Room for cream - Great porno title (Gina) (ACS)
Pedialyte shower - Worst sexual act ever (Sklar) (ACS)
Foot Zunki - Add-on to the Pedialyte shower (ACS)
Self rimming sink - gay slang (AOTH)
Harvey Mudd - gay bar drink where vermouth and bartender shit is mixed in a goblet (ACS)
Barney’s Beanery - ultimate name for a gay bar (ACS)
Parallel park both ways - euphemism for being bi (GS)
The Big Three - Gerago’s junk (RD)
73 - When a fat guy tries to 69 with a chubby prostitute he met at a ham radio convention(ACS)
Backlog - Stormy Daniels movie title (Bryan)(ACS)
Madison Bear - Sounds like an dating app for gay hairy dudes who are married (ACS)
Back pay - Good porn title name (ACS)

Miscellaneous People

Trajectory Hagar - High school kid "heading down the wrong path" in life (ACS)
Slick Mouth - Adam's prison name (ACS)
Rich Carless - Cool homeless guy name (ACS)
Keyless Chuck - Best homeless guy name (ACS)
Nasal Ranger - Worst superhero name ever (Gina) (ACS)
Krav Maga (2) - Good name for a sheriff (ADS)
Hubcap Annie - Horror that hangs out with Keyless Chuck (ACS)
Becky Honkington (Allison) (ACS)
Monica Chugscock - (Pronounced "Shuggscawk") (ADS)
Tyvek DuPont - Best rich guy’s name (AOTH)
Mattress - A Model/actress (ACS)
Hofmeister Kink - Nazi war criminal who's been in hiding in Brazil for the past 61 years. aka Jake Johnson (ACS)
Serpiginous - The world's wimpiest swordsman. Sir Piginous of Wussville (LL)
Chick Fil a - Great play-by-play guy for the Warriors from the 70’s (Show?)
Peri Menopausal - Best P.I. working the Chicago beat (LL)
Whiskey Dick - The neighborhood pedophile in the clown outfit (ACS)
Surge - Guy that drives for ÜBER (ACS)
Babbling Brook - Great name for a female cattle auctioneer (PM)
Terra Firma - Name of the "woman of color" that heckled Adam at a Ventura live show and was removed by force (The Ranker Podcast)
Octomom - Great Batman villain (Bryan) (ACS)
Larry The Cabinet Guy - Failed Israeli comic…"Don't get 'er done!" (ACS)
Rod Blagojevich - Joe Francis' slimy brother who sells above ground pools out of a primered van (ACS)
Cockchug Man - The gay superhero in The Village People that wears just all leather (ACS)
MEL-ROL- She's one of The Spice Girls (AOTH)
Hand Farts - A new comedian Adam had never heard of (ACS)
Juan Jeremy - The greatest international film star ever (ACS)
Bitchathane Jackson - Good name for a "sista" (ACS)
Tobar - Perfect caveman name (ACS)
Vroman - A fast moving Roman (ACS)
Korn Syrup and Fructose - Women of color who work at the strip club with Jade (stage 4) (ACS)
Fred Meyer - Lucy's neighbor (ACS)
Kimchi - The Asian flutist (ACS)
Pacoima - The mechanic from Taxi (ACS)
Dick Salt - NATO Alliance General (ACS)
Dick Salt (2) - Manger of the Mariners in the early 70’s (Bryan) (ACS)
Caramel And Fudge - Two more African-American prostitutes that lived in the apartment above Adam’s (ACS)
Peaches - The whore that lived upstairs (ACS)
F. Me Bailey - Greatest lawyer of all time (RD)
Agua Caliente - Loves that guy. He does a great John Madden (ACS)
Senior Penis - One the most dangerous drug lords to ever work (ADS)
Shill Du'Jour - Good Bond secretary name (RD)
Brexit Romero - Sounds like an International assassin (ACS)
Lugansk - That gay diver who hit his head and gave the whole Canadian team AIDS (ACS)
Leak O'rama - A Dutch action star, starred in “Sudden Death” (AOTH)
Vaginismus - Great black guy name (ADS)
Normcore - Guy that owns Westwood one (ACS)
LaTolstoy - Great black guy name (ACS)
Shapiro – Artist who is really good at anime. Died in the 60’s but was a real trendsetter (ACS)
Chuck Spears – Good name for a racist. “Hey you workin’ with Chuck Spears over at the Klan?” (ACS)
Norethindrone - DAG’s Sister (CLL)
La Tuskegee - Black airline pilot (ACS)
C-clamps – Nickname for Adam’s step-mom. “Ol’ C-clamps locked me out of the house again.” (ACS)
Harry Nilsson - (Gary thinks) he does the voices on The Simpsons (ADS)
Nutella - Great name for a crazy black woman (ACS)
Sia - The perfect person to break up with. Would be perfect if she was dating Jack (hit the road Jack) (ACS)
The Ball Catcher - What Adam used to call Ray's ass in junior high (ACFBSL)
MOAB - Matt's new nickname (Mother of All Buttholes) (AONTH)
Trip Reeb - Great name for a white guy (ACS)
Merle Horn - One of the greatest best ropers to ever come down the Pecos (ACS)
The Boring Machine - Lynette's name for Adam (ACS)
Avocado Hand - The nickname of Eric Clapton's brother (Chet) who works at a Mexican place and is charge of the guacamole (ACS)
Bagel Hand - Clapton's Jewish cousin (ACS)
Fa-Sheeya (fascia) - A heavy set woman of color that works at the DMV (ACAFBSL)
Ghrelin - New AM/PM mascot (ACS)
Krav Maga (3) - An Israeli Captain from 1946 (ACS)
Cuban Boa - Sounds like a dark skinned trannie (ACS)
Gabardine - She's a very chatty woman of color middle-aged and she'll talk your ear off. (ACS)
Guy Dudebro - Greatest name ever (AOTH)
Otto Warmbier- Simultaneously the greatest and worst beer master brewer name ever (ACS)
Leif Geragos - Greatest rocking attorney ever Viking rocker attorney (ACS)
Ernest J. Bigot - "I'm just asking....I'm just wanna know...." (ACS)
Panzanella - Cobra's full name (ACS)
Sheet Metal Nibbler - Great name for Matt the porcelain punisher (AOTH)
Big Grenadine - Sounds like a large black neighbor (ACS)
Silent gym - Next to Keyless Chuck, best homeless guy name ever (ACS)
Nuchilla - Sounds like a black vampire (Theo Von) (ACS)
D' poleon - Black Napoleon (ACS)
Luke Rockhold - Sounds like a character on The Flintstones (GS)
Sissy squat - She was hot (AOTH)
Beulah - The town horror (RD)
Ronan Farrow - One of the best wheel men in Europe (ACS)
Duke Bagg - Comedian Ian Bagg's brother (ACS)
Root Ball Grinder - A horrible term for a bitchy wife (Ruth Ballgrinder and Harriet Mulcher) (Tim Allen) (ACS)
Paul Funyun - Just a big dude who likes to have fun. Has a pink ox as a sidekick (ACS)
Page/Savage - A great lawyer team (Adam Ray) (ACS)
Ivar the Boneless - Ace’s dad’s nickname in high school. aka Jim the spineless (ACS)
Bash Worthy - Comic strip's character name/title (ACS)
Uncle Tom-bién - Mexican Uncle Tom (ACS)
Alist Poon - An Indian exchange student who has cerebral palsy (ACS)
Indignant Asswipes - Good name for an improv troupe (Gina) (ACS)
Flora in Fauna - two black chicks that work for him (ADS)
Cheap - Name of a he/she that literally went under sexual assignment surgery last month (ACS)
Heroin (1)(Pronounced Ehr-o-win by JCVD) A character in Lord Of The Rings (Bryan) (ACS)
Yersinia pestis - Ace did Celebrity Apprentice with that dude. He won that year (ADS)
Morgue Mode - Sounds like a guy from Iceland who is a DJ (ACS)
Rachel Bias - Great stripper name (ACS)
Buzz Ramjet - Aviation attorney (ACS)
Black Cherry - Stripper name Bryan (ACS)
Saffron - Sassy black woman in Meg Whitman movie (ACS)
Vibranium - a new black kid name from Black Panther (ACS)
Bird Nerd - Marvel superhero (ACS)
Merch Galore - Worst Bond secretary ever. Total sellout. Always wearing her own swag (GS)
Bathroom Goalie - New code for fat chicks sitting next to you on an airplane (ACS)
Skip Loader -Kurt Loder’s older brother (ACS)
F. Me Money - greatest attorney rapper ever (RD)

Morning Zoos/DJ's/Radio Stations

Gum and Condoms - (Show?)
Dusty Labia - Adam's handle when he used to do AM Mornings. (ACS)
Asscrack and Backsack in the morning with Sludge (LL)
Crockpots and Headphones (ACS)
Booger and Floor Wax (ACS)
Almonds and Water (ACS)
Cold Butter And Calves (ADS)
Schluter And The Drain - Schluter has a thick Austrian accent , while "The Drain" has a super low voice (AOTH)
Ace Rockolla - Just Google "Ace Rockolla Lightning round...." (LL)
Fungus and Mold (Show?)
Stupid and Petty (Show?)
Eunice and Edgar - Bubba the Love Sponge's parents (ACS)
Flip Flops and Fanny Packs (ACS)
Hairy Shin - Does a KCRE show in the weekends (ACS)
Deep Bra Grooves - Should be a Sirius XM station Channel 248, C+ and above! (ACS)
Andy and Opie - Great Radio Show (ACS)
QuietRock - Sounds like an easy listening rock station (AOTH)
Quiet Crush - A good easy listening radio station (ACS)
The Tool Box - SiriusXM took tune station aka KTOL (ACS)
Ray's Enema Antics - New podcast on Carolla Digital (Bryan)(ACS)
Doug Gets Blown While He Eats Pudding - Doug Benson's next podcast (ACS)
Cat Packer - Used to do mornings with her brother, Fudge (ACS)
Duke and Shinola - good morning show team (ACS)
Mother Trucker - Adam’s Podcast with caller Miguel (AOTH)

Places

Boobville - (LL)
Pedoph Isle aka Pedophile Island - Island where are all the pedophiles are sent to live. (Also a TV show/movie idea) (LL)
Lil' Lord Fauntleroy’s Academy for Albino Hemophiliacs - Drew's childhood school (LL)
Doesntexistizcan - Where presidential candidate Platitude's grandfather was from (ACS)
Boga Raton - The world's worst resort spot (Show?)
Meat Yard - Great name for a gay bar (ACS)
Mister Fister's - Adam's all-time top name for a gay bar (ACS)
Sub-Par - Worst name for a submarine sandwich shop (Show?)
Queen Mary - Great name for a tranny bar (ACS)
NuvaRing - A German racetrack. "The new Nissan GTR turned it in 7:21, faster than the Corvette." (Show?)
Louis Pasteur Middle School (ACS)
Helm’s Deep - World's first gay bar bakery (ACS)
Kal Penn - One of the best sounding names to get an engineering degree from (ACS)
Alaska State Motto - Love fishing but I hate your kids? Alaska! (PM)
Duke University - John Wayne's college (ACS)
Planned Possumhood - Planned Parenthood in Arkansas (ACS)
Fruit Stand - Great name for a gay bar (ACS)
Poo Poo City - Where Charles Fletcher Loomis' house is located (ACS)
Blood Bank - Great name for a check cashing place in the hood (ACS)
Bass Manor - Great name for a gay bar (ACS)
The Dead C - Sounds like the worst name for a lesbian bar ever (ACS)
Wood Bar - Good name for a gay bar (ACS)
Ghost Load - Ride at Calico Ghost Town (ADS)
Nasacort - Country club for Jewish folks where they play tennis at (ADS)
L.A. HOTT (1) - An 80's bar with an outdoor door seating area (ACS)
Fairy Wings - Good name for a bar on the west side (ACS)
Second Hand/First World - Store that sells rich whitey’s high end stuff (ACS)
The Lance Hunter - Perfect name for a gay bar (Dumb People Town)
Pervert Park - Theo Vaughn grew up there (ACS)
Big Sur - Great name for a big and tall shop (Show?)
Studio Centric - Sounds like a Utopia. Between Valley Village and Sherman Oaks (AOTH)
Asstard - Thor came from that planet (ACS)
Grand Entrance - Great name for a gay bar (AOTH)
Thermopolis - Where the Bun Boy is (ACS)
The Turkish Embassy - Gay bar (ACS)
Low Tide - Gay code for boner in the rear view mirror (ACS)
Corumption - On the way to Vegas, where Heidi Fleiss lives with her macaws (ACS)
C.C. Fichens - Sounds like a pretzel stand (Gina) (ACS)
Timpani Barn - where to get timpani to go, has three big Mexicans in the kitchen (ACS)
Heroin (2)(Pronounced Ehr-o-win by JCVD) The health food store in Venice (ACS)
Pocket Passers - Next to Mister Fister’s (Gina) (ACS)
The Mexican Faire - Worst fair ever (ACS)
Hanoi Hospice - Only place worse than the Hanoi Hilton (ACS)
Kaleblazer- Gay juice bar (ACS)
Hot Dog Cannon - good name for a bar next to The Abbey (ACS)
Dyskeratosis - where Vinnie lives, lots of Greek folks, a family oriented community (ACS)
Kind of, Italy - Where Ace’s family is from. Where he gets his kinky hair. (ADS)

Miscellaneous

Cleaning The Pink Turtle - Bryan's name for pleasuring oneself (ACS)
Analingus - A new type of breath mint (LL)
The Milk Of Arthritic Goats - A rabbi's curse: "May you suckle at the teet of the milk of arthritic goat!!!" (ACS)
Carbon Dating - A black dating website (ACS)
RU486 - Vanity plate for a guy who runs an abortion clinic (ADS)
Jet Green - Amsterdam's Airlines (ACS)
Stromer, Oldhafer and Carolla - World's worst law firm (AOTH)
Ira Carolla - Sounds like an affliction "Oh my Ira Carolla's acting up" (ACS)
Sawjay - Sounds French...gay word for sausage. "I was strokin' this dude’s sawjay" (ACS)
Smokeless Cigarette - Name for Dr. Drew's honker after his prostate surgery (ADS)
El Niño - Name of "Sinn" strip club DJ's cock (ACS)
Blue Man - Crazy hairdresser's macaw who doesn't judge (PM)
Lucia - An Italian moped (ACS)
American Jewish World Service - A van that's begging to be shot at (ACS)
E-aye? - Canadian version of EBay (ACS)
Sweatpants Lesbian - What Adam would be. An in-between lesbian. Not a lipstick lesbian, not a butch dyke (ACS)
SuckStrong - Bill Clinton's bracelet (ACS)
Gaybus - Gay and bogus (ACS)
Flappy Bird - The most offensive name for the vagina (ACS)
G8 (Summit) - The Pontiac that Oprah gave away on her show (ACS)
Oracle A The Delphi - Big new startup company (ADS)
Crewkakke - A type of sweater (ACS)
The Flying Dutchman - Great name for an Amsterdam airlines (ACS)
Cleaning My Chain - Euphemism for beating off (ACS)
Awesome Town - A gathering of three or more polar bears (ACS)
Avocado - The Greek word for nut sack (ACS)
Doucherette - A gum/patch that douchebags chew/use (ACS)
Urban Milling -Black guys standing around (AOTH)
Synesthesia - When you eat your own hair (ACS)
Tuck Rule - When a guy pretends he's a chick and stands in front of the mirror (ACS)
My #2 Pencil Is Out Of Lead - Another term for erectile dysfunction (ACS)
Float A Bond - When a politician farts (RD)
Vaginismus - black people's holiday, accompanied with a lot of ceremonial garb (ADS)
Vaseline and Gauze - Elizabeth Taylor's new scent (ACS)
Jewber - A drunk on a 10-speed (ACS)
Chickpea - What Gina does when we camp (ACS)
Oscar Squad (2) - Bad gay code (ACS)
Airbus - Worst name for an aircraft. Sounds like “air donkey” (AOTH)
Shailene Woodley - Sounds like the most fantastical verb/adverb combo. “I want to Shailene Woodley through a field of poppies with you” (Gina) (Twitter)
Asshole Rider (2) - Worst piece of exercise equipment Vinnie’s ever endorsed (ACS)
Diario La Prensa - Stealer of the jersey in Spanish (ACS)
The Sicilian Fly Swatter - Sounds like a WWF move (Gina) (ACS)
Jellyfish - Sounds like something your grandpa would buy for you at the mall (ACS)
Fruit Fly - More politically correct term for fag hag (Show?)
Jewgling - When a Jew "Googles" their symptoms (ACS)
Tavares - David Wild's boner medicine (ACS)
Jew -Over - A mulligan from a barmitzva. "Uh, I misread that...can I get a Jew-over?" (ACS)
Ossified - That's a Don King word, there (ACS)
Zero for Cecil - Worst charity ever (Bald Bryan) (ACS)
A++ - A bra that Gina will never see (ACS)
Joycelyn - A good name for Curly from the Three Stooges to say (ACS)
Phallisee - Latin for "to see the penis" (ADS)
Coffee Nap - Euphemism for pooping in your pants (ACS)
USS Monitor - Doesn't sound like a ship of war, sounds like a night nurse (ACS)
Dotard - A skirt a man wears (ACS)
Wilding- Something derogatory that takes place in public pools in certain counties (ACS)
Caveat - Latin for shitting on Adam's point (ADS)
Festiva - Sounds like a boner medicine (ACS)
Depeche Mode - French for “who dealt it?” (ADS)
Beefy Clutch – The purse Gina thought Lady Gaga took to the Emmy’s (ACS)
Sig Sauer - Something you would yell at Oktoberfest before downing a stiff stein of stout (ACS)
Jeans day – Sounds like the special day for your special need son Gene, to raise money (ACS)
Wilding - What takes place in public pools in certain counties (GS)
4F - Can’t/won’t be eligible for the draft (ACS)
Groupie - a kind of fish (ACS)
The African chick - Horrible name for a boat (ACS)
Inclusion rider - Snowboard for retarded kids (ACS)
The Urethra - Bad name for a car (ACS)
Mercury retrograde - when you take your index finger and shove it under your sack before you blow, and you belch it up later (ACS)
UEFA - Transsexuals playing soccer with a balled up maxi pad (GS)
Missed Connections- The worst airline ever (ACS)
Carollo - Sounds like a Tool you’d use rarely (ACS)
Brembo - that Mexican food company that makes that bread (Matt) (ACS)
Preemptive gay strike - Worst video game ever (ADS)
Futon - Chinese for bear trap (ACS)
Sexual Battery - Batteries especially made for sexual devices. Somewhere between AA and C (ACS)

Food/Drinks

Deer Bits - A venison cereal. Made of frosted deer flakes (Show?)
Coco Chanel - Nestlé’s newest coffee flavor (ACS)
Honey Dicks - Best cereal name ever (ACS)
Dawson's Beard - A pudding flavor Ace saw at Whole Foods (ACS)
Mighty Mutts - Worst breakfast cereal ever (ADS)
Chillax - A cinnamon based drink from "Hector's" country (ACS)
Black Dick - An English desert (ACS)
Tardy Digression - Sounds like a finger food..."would you like another tardy digression?" "No, I'm saving room for the main meal" (IFYWABC)
Double Bird Strike - Mixed drink created by Ace and Teresa. Made with Grey Goose, Wild Turkey, a splash of Canadian Club, and a splash of Hudson River water (ACS)
GAYtorade - A sports drink for gay people, because they lose essential body fluids (ACS)
University of Illinois At Urbana Champaign - Sounds like a carbonated drink for black people (ACS)
Flinch Fuck - Part of a nutritious breakfast, and a healthy relationship (ADS)
Phantom Punch - Something Bill Cosby gave his lady friends (ACS)
Pansy Sauce - Goes good with some shrimp (ADS)
Tilted Pillar - Kick ass IPA (AOTH)
Shaver - A good name for a miniature pastrami sandwich (Cousin Sal Show)
GPA - Something they add to children's cereal (ACS)
Stellwell's - A new low fat snack cracker (ACS)
Conchata Ferrell - A great cheese/unwanted cat (ACS)
Poopwell's - One of the worst snacks Nabisco has ever put their name on (ACS)
Belldini – Latest Taco Bell offering (ACS)
Fuzzy Zoeller – Zima with a jigger of peach schnapps (ACS)
Millennial Malaise - A sweet honey dipping sauce (ADS)
Jelani Cobb - Sounds like an Indian dish (Gina) (ACS)
Air Doodle - The very worst Super Bowl snack on the planet (ACS)
Faygala - Jewish sports drink (ACS)
Stroke Cane - Sounds like some sugary treat, mixed with a reach around (ACS)
The Silence Breakers (2) - good name for a mint (ACS)
Lesbian Squirt - Sponsor of the Dinah Shore Classic (ACS)
Son of Goose - Worst vodka ever. Comes in a plastic squeeze bottle (ACS)
Orange Hitler - Worst Hi-C flavor ever (ACS)

TV Shows/Movies

Cunt du' Jour - A great Bond villain name (ACS)
Coffee and Donuts - (Charlie Coffee III and Johnny Donetti) Johnny's a tough street wise cop whose jive talking and plays by his own rules and Charlie's super uptight (LL)
Pedoph Isle (aka) Pedophile Island - All pedophiles are sent to live on an isolated island, and a 747 full of Boy Scouts crash lands there and they have to fight to survive (Also a place) (ACS)
Anus and Eyeball - Buddy cop TV show duo (ACS)
Pussy Pioneer - John Candy's last movie (ACS)
Red Velvet - Made up movie character Clown played by Paul Giamatti. "Was secret service, and someone died on his watch. Now he's takin to clownin'." Wears a red velvet clown outfit. (ACS)
Destination Of The Semen - (Adam Ray) A movie Harrison Ford passed on twice (ACS)
Gay Eye - Movie where Adam plays Buddy McKlan, a racist homophobic mechanic who is blinded in a freak hot transmission fluid accident. He gets the donor eyes from a gay guy who perished on a moped accident in Antigua. Co-starring Larry the Cable Guy as his best friend. (Co-written by Bryan Cranston) (ACS)
Grinders - Sitcom where Jon Gruden moves in with Johnny Manziel (ACS)
Squishy Red River - Movie that started John Wayne (Show?)
Gusset And Cable - Perfect Cop buddy duo team (AOTH)
Just One Of The Gays - Stars Shia LaBeouf (ACS)
Hard Impact - Sounds like a Van Damme movie from the 90's (ACS)
Hammer Pants And Ice - Worst cop detective duo from the 80's (ACS)
Living With The Kilowatts - Adam's new animated series where they just leave toaster ovens on all day (ACS)
Keep Calm And Rape A Lot - Worst Monty Python film ever (ACS)
Medical Mishaps - New show Dave Coulier and Tawny Kitaen could host (ACS)
Roaming With Bison - Another great Bill Murray movie (ACS)
Gainesville Florida Financial Planner - Sounds like a Saturday Night Live skit (ACS)
Blame the Bee Gees - Adam's next documentary (ACS)
Adam Knees Your Dad In The Nuts - Adam's new game show (ACS)
Navigeddon - Terrorists take over all of the GPS systems of cars, and send them careening into the Grand Canyon (ACS)
Rings Of Honor - Terrorists take over Olympic training facility in Colorado Springs, and the athletes have to use their individual skills to escape. (Cameo by Randy Couture as the salty old coach) (ACS)
Endless Time/Ample Time For Backup - Adam's new Netflix series (ACS)
Tarred n' Feathered - Buddy flick starring a retarded guy and an Indian chief (Show?)
Mr. Will Doo And Can Doo - PSA Motivational cartoon bathroom characters Will Doo (Played by Will Arnette) and Can Doo is shaped like a toilet. Filmed in kitschy Clutch Cargo style animation (ADS)
Robot Lawyer - Great Phil Hartman bit (ACS)
Umpire News Network - Adam's channel with umpires reporting. Unbiased reporting (ACS)
Sofa Tard - New CW show coming soon (Matt) (AOTH)
Junior Fantasy Island - Show where kids of reckless parents are shipped off to live with Bill Cosby and Felicia Rashad (ADS)
2 And A Half Denali's - Hasn't been same since Sheen left (ACS)
So Kanye - Sitcom from the 90's (ACS)
Ridicuopothy - Sounds like a Mike Judge movie (ADS)
Master Buck - One of John Candy's most controversial movies (ACS)
LA HOTT (1) - An 80’s bar with an outdoor door seating area (ACS)
Mother Hitler - Coming to TNT. Starring Patrick Swayze's bother, Don (ACS)
Sink and Bounce - Movie about roller boogie from the 80's, starred Lil' Bow Wow (ACS)
The Debs - A made up CW network show where you just put all the hot chicks in Hollywood (ACS)
The Origin Story Of AIDS - Worst Marvel movie ever (Bryan)(ACS)
Everybody Hates Vinnie - Horrible sitcom (ACS)
Chick Clan - Good movie title (ACS)
Condo in Redondo - Best movie I ever did (ADS)
Red Lobsteria - New show Dr. Drew was talking about where African Americans form their own country (ACS)
Earthquake rehab - Reality show Dr. drew seismic expert and a civil engineer come together (Rainn Wilson) (ACS)
Rooster Jones - Great John Wayne movie. Super Fly meets True Grit (ACS)
Ernest Bigot goes to..... (ACS)
Nickels On The Job - First and only Jewish gum shoe on the job. ABC, Friday nights, 10:00 p.m. (ADS)
Solicitor General - Great Danny Kaye movie (RD)
Disjointed - Lorena Bobbitt biopic (ADS)
Habib and Company - Horrible children's show (MS)
Bobby's Room - Howie Mandel animated project from the 90's (ACS)
Page/Savage - Great cop duo show from the ‘80’s (Adam Ray) (ACS)
Paper Asshole - Great Tatum O’Neal film (ACS)
L.A. HOTT (2) - Failed Steven Bochco series pilot (ACS)
Pieces Of String Too Small To Use - Lena Dunham film from the late 90’s (ACS)
Oscar Squad - New Marvel Movie (Gina) (ACS)
Cortron/Melamine - Transformers (Gina) (ACS)
Anoscope - Worst way to see a movie (ADS)
Practical Rapist - New SNL character (Gina) (ACS)
Superfoot - Worst Marvel movie ever (Bryan) (ACS)
Celebrity Food Chain - Would be a great show (Jeff Cesario) (ACS)
Backsack and Anus - Worst cop duo ever (RS)
Korean moyle - ABC’s next sitcom (Jeff) ACS
Nanny Huntin ‘with Ted Nugent - Great reality show I’d watch (ACS)
Progressive pope - New sitcom (Gina) ACS
Nick Mancuso: Construction Fluffer - New TV Show (AONT)
Rush Blitzer - Adam’s character from his movie, “Snapper” (BSR)
The Baldwin’s and Beyond -Great reality show (RD)
The Rogue Deuce - The next Star Wars movie (ADS)
Mr. Goodbar To The Rescue - Ace loves that movie (ACS)
Wrestling Squatters - New show on YouTube Red starring Eric Stromer (AOTH)

Books/Coffee Table Books

Dade County Black Prom, 1985 (ACS)
Here Are The Pajamas We Picture You In (ACS)
Three Shitty Homes, One Washing Machine, Zero Dryers - Title of Adam's new book (Ray) (AOTH)
Chapstick And Batteries - Title of Adam's next bestselling book (ACS)
Who The Fuck Put Their Sombrero on My Keys? – Title of Adam’s next book (ACS)
Cunt With A Grunt - Adam's favorite Dr. Seuss book (PM)
You'll Never See A Cockroach Jog (PM)
Kemo Skinny Calves - Adam's new children's book (ADS)
You're Dyslexic And I'm Dumb - Adam and John Popper's collaborative next book (ACS)
I Get It If You’re GWAR - Adam's next book (ACS)
Bulk Magazine - Costco magazine that Jimmy Kimmell graced the cover of twice (ACS)
Do You Have To Take Your Top Off To Dye Your Pubes, Drew? (LL)
Glamping With Moriah - Adam's new book (ACS)
From The Mouths of Babes (Hot Chicks Not Babies) (ACS)
(The) Sweet Spot - Adam's next book (Bryan) (ACS)
I Thought Things Would Be Better When I Was Rich (ACS)
Radio Station Kitchen (ACS)
Post-it Notes In Radio Station Kitchens (ACS)
Comedy Club Green Rooms And The Sofas That Were Not Made For Them (ACS)
Jethro, the Mexican Jew - A great children's book (Gina) (ACS)
Professor and the Construction Worker -The worst children's book ever (ACS)
Willie and the Weed - Good name for a children's book (ACS)
What Black People Think White People Complain About (ACS)
Everyone Eventually Becomes The Man (ACS)
Recipe for Misery (1) - Name Of Adam’s next book (ACS)
In Defense Of Black Face - Adam’s next book (ACS)
Hurry Up And Make Sense (2) - Biography title of the Talking Heads (ACS)

Native American Names

Chief Thunderbear (LL)
Dances With Cocks (ACS)
Dances With Lipstick (ACS)
Ol' Urethra Windows (ACS)
Oxnard - Indian name meaning the balls of a bull (ACS)

V/P Names

Absorbent Rag - Good name for T's V (ACS)
Hurt Locker - Another name for T's V (ACS)
Judge's Mansion - Another name for T's G
Cmarket.com - Another name for T's V (ACS)
City of Industry - Another name for T's V (ACS)
Dutch Mook - Another name for T's V (ACS)s V
No Safe Spaces - Great name for T's V (ACS)
Hobo Stove - Another name for A's V (ACS)
Sausage Grinder - Another name for A's V (ACS)
Dixville Notch - Another name for G's V (ACS)
Snake River Canyon - Another name for G's V (ACS)
Dakota Access Pipeline - Another name for G's V (ACS)
The Holidome - Another name for G’s V (ACS)
Discovery Bay - Great name for G's V (ACS)
B.O. Box - Great name for G's V (ACS)
Sea bag - Good name for G's V (ACS)
El Portal - Great name for G's V (ACS)
Harry Belafonte - Adam's name for his junk, if he were a woman (Show?)
Top Gear - Another name for Adam’s junk (ACS)
El Gordo/King Taco - Good name for G’s V (ACS)
Port of Karachi - Good name for G’s V (ACS)
submitted by Texas1971 to AdamCarolla [link] [comments]


2020.03.21 09:33 jmangelo67 JMAn's Biased Voting Guide for CBRXS2 AKA all 61 civs you need to vote for

I inarguably know best and I am campaigning because I need to get Reddit karma and presence on this sub. Let's do this. (This is meant to be taken as my serious picks but a lot of this is just my humor, not actual insults. Not all picks have a reasonable explanation, but are my picks regardless)
1) Northern British Isles & Greenland: The Picts. Let's face it, Robert the Bruce got his shit kicked in. They settled North??? FUCKING NORTH? Moving in, the Picts are at the northernmost tip of the Isles. The only direction they will settle is south until they get boats. Not to mention the Spearmen of the Picts are extremely powerful attackers and can scorch enemy lands extremely fast and well. They trade good, too. The Picts are badasses. Give them the spot.
2) England & Ireland: Wales under Owain Glwyndr. Cymru am byth! I won't lie, Llewelyn is not the best AI. He is not nearly as complex as Owain, and despite the strategic resources being available to Llewelyn over the course of the mid game, Owain has much more powerful uniques in comparison and is overall one of the stronger BR civs. Thought Caratacus and Atlee are big competition in this fight... Cmon guys, you know Wales is the rightful ruler of the Isles. They'll give the Picts a good fight and make the theatre much more interesting to start, unlike this BR between the Isle of Mann and Scotland.
3) Scandinavia: Sweden under Karl XII. Inarguably one of the most brutal military AIs in the community, Karl XII will bring Tre Kronor to glory. He is not my favourite, not by a long shot, but damnit he is good. Damnit he will be a contender. Damnit he is the hard handed version of the Inuit. Damnit, he is the militaristic genius Scandinavia needs. No more success due to snowballing. Success will be defined by a strong contender, not weird gimmicks or a neighbouring civilization.
4) Iberia: Spain under Francisco Franco. You best ROLL that R when you read that name! Francisco Franco is based on a WW2 fascist who somehow managed to keep out of aiding the Axis (thank our spies for that). Franco is an EXCELLENT bad guy. You know religion? That thing you all see as useless? Well Franco MAKES it worthwhile. Whereas Algeria had been defensive, Franco attacks with religion. It weakens cities, it makes its units harder. He is a powerhouse. Plus he gets war bombers that blow up cities. How neato is that? Vote Franco for your Big Bad from Iberia!
5) France and (most of) the Low Countries: France under Clemenceau. You will find that if I can pick a WWI nation, I will likely put preference on it. But the Paris Peace Conference UA is so powerful that the expansion of cities brought on by peace deals will make Clemenceau an excellent choice. Let's face it, a civ rarely gets killed in one war. It takes multiple attacks to win this game. And with random DoWs, France will have an excellent start to combat civs like Karl XII, Owain, Franco, and my other choices here. Put Clemenceau HIGH on your list. He is worth the consideration.
6) Germany: Germany under Wilhelm II. Again, World War I. The Schlieffen Plan is an excellent portrait of German warfare. It certainly would be better placed as Hitler's UA but... fuck that guy, Wilhelm is cooler anyways. Stormtroopers are juggernauts of the late mid-game, and the U-Boat is an excellent hit and run naval unit. The World War theme in Europe allows for quite the battle of militaristic brains. Give the Kaiser a chance to shine, people! Also acceptable is the Netherlands but you will leave most of Germany empty.
7) Italy: You have four options here, any other choice is dead wrong. Italy under Victor Emmanuel III keeps with the World War I theme. They perform very well in the Balkans, which will be their niggest hurdle. They also perform very well in defensive wars, which they're going to need to do to excel here. Italy under Mussolini. Military production powerhouse, and has a great naval game. Their ship is stronger than Emmanuel's ship. Also a great bad guy. Papal States under Innocent III. Crusades and the masters of the slow game. Like Minoa, an excellent underdog AI. Unlike Minoa, doesn't have a dogshit start and its uniques will apply through the whole game. Final optipn here is Two Sicilies. It has the best Naval AI. Period. That is due to their uniques and how they spawn naval units that are both powerful and quantitatively high. They are also arguably one of the most interesting options. I want any of these four. Don't make me mad and pick something else.
8): "Southeast Europe" but actually the Balkans: I know you think I will say Venizelos Greece because I'm a Greek and want the WWI theme. Or a city state. Surprise, not going to pick that. Albania under Skanderbeg is without a doubt one of the toughest nuts to crack, and has a beautiful crimson colour scheme to boot. Stradiot are brokenly hard defensively, the city distance bonus means great things if they survive the early game, and the Kulle heals Albanian units and increases unit production. What more can you want? This civ is a Balkanite's wet dream for BRs. And if you don't like my Shiqipi brothers in Albania, pick Shiqipi sisters in Kosovo. Their UA is chaotic and awesome. Go read it. If you loke neither, vote Ferdinand I's Bulgaria (cool WWI Bulgaria) OR Venizelos. If you don't like Modern, vote Thebes under Epaminondas. Thebes is cool.
9) Poland and the Baltics: Poland under Jozef Piłsudski. Teutonic Knights are redundant, you already have Germany. Want Lithuania? Well, Piłsudski was ethnically Lithuanian. Want World War I? Piłsudski and Paderewsky practically lead an underground movement to free Poland during WWI. Want the best Poland? Even Senshidenshi agrees that this is the best Poland. Poland stronk. Piłsudski brings back Intermarium Polska. Piłsudski makes Poland the Christ of All Nations. If they fall behind in tech? Or military? Who cares? Poland's uniques are made to fight an uphill battle and WIN. Poland is STRONK.
10) Gulf of Finland: Russia under Nicholas II. Aside from the World War I theme that I am obsessed with here, this civilization is decidedly NOT terrible. I am eyeing Stalin and Ivan the TERRIBLE here. This civilization is not overly complex. It is not Catherine the Great. It is not Finland under Mannerheim, but damnit... just listen to what I have to say about its opponent.
11) Russia and East Europe: USSR under Lenin. If you pick Nicholas II, you can get Lenin and relive your Bolshevik Revolution fantasy in the BR. Have them duke this blood feud out! Maybe even get Kolchak in on it in the Asia vote! Lenin is... historically bad at AI games. But it does not change that this will make for an interwsting rivalry in Russia. But if you want a... ugh. Actual civ to have a chance? Vote for Olga's Kievan Rus. It is inarguably one of the better AIs in the region and TarcisioCM has such a limited quantity of quality civilizations already that haven't been in a BR. It gets buffs to promoting units and from breaking diplomatic deals which will happen ALL THE TIME. They will storm their enemies and win quite handily. Behind that, Vladimir and Pskov are cool.
12) The Urals: The Nenets. This is inarguable. There are only four civs in this region. Both Kazan and Khanty-Mansi have the issues of being dated & simple and brokenly overpowered respectively. Great Perm and the Nenets are the real competition, and Great Perm loses only because its uniques are gold based in an AI game where gold is practically inconsequential. The Nenets, meanwhile, have doggos. Not only do they have doggos, but they have an ever increasing source of Deer, which in turn means an ever increasing source of Growth until the Future Era late game. The Nenets are the best pick, and I feel bad that I picked the Albanians over Horthy and Senshi needs some of his gudly civs in here.
13) Anatolia & The Holy Land: Jerusalem under Baldwin III. Let's cut the crap with the Constantinople start. It's a dogshit start for a civ and I am tired of us picking cool civilizations with an insurmountable start over cool civilizations with a good one. It absolutely helps that Baldwin III has a wide and impressive array of tools through his Crusading Order uniques. He will doubtlessly be a strong player, as he has a history of being one and has been one for awhile. If you don't want Crusaders, I suggest the Hittites under Supiluliuma I because it's an ancient culture, a cool civilization, has a start in the center of Anatolia, and Tomatekh has such few civs to choose from nowadays.
14) Caucasus: Greater Armenia under Tigranes II (JFD). Let me preface that I love the Khazars. They are excellent nomadic horsemen that will let the Steppes run red with blood whilst backed by a glorious Jewish backdrop. But we had a non-Caucasus culture win the Caucasus vote last time, and this civilization is JUST as good, and has a lot of perks to supporting it. Aside from Tigranes II being the greatest Armenian king ever and bringing it to its greatest extent in its history, Greater Armenia has the benefit of having heavy production bonuses to Horse & Siege units. Seriously, their knight UU heals like crazy during wartime and is a defensive powerhouse. They get bonuses to mounted unit production AND get horses from defensive buildings. That's more Horse units than Parthia AND the Kazakhs from CBRX! Already outdoing their competition unique-wise. Having a strong siege line means excellent city damage capabilities. And for you SPQR Nuts out there, this version of Armenia is the Armenia that held both Rome AND Persia at bay, being the strongest buffer state in ancient history. There is a reason why this Armenia has "Greater" in its title. It is because this truly is the most glorious Hayastan in existence. Vote Tigranes II. Vote for Greater Armenia!
15) Nile Valley: Egypt. Next.
16) East Maghreb: The Garamantes. The Garamantes have the benefit of having fresh water in their horribly dry desert start vis-à-vis their Foggara UI. They may start inland rather than coastally, but they have the tendency through their Plumed Nomads to travel the Sahara quickly. By doing that, they have scouted out multiple settle opportunities in both the Sahara and Sahel region, meaning that this civilization will have a buff to their expansion no matter their bias roll. They also are a cool ancient desert culture in Fezzan and fought against the Romans. Really rad! If you don't like the Garamantes, I would recommend the Vandals for stumbling fun or Dido's Carthage by JFD.
17) West Maghreb: Rif. Though I love the Guanches and find their culture fascinating, their TSL and their mechanical uniques lend me to believe that their hope of survival is short lived. Now compare this to the Republic of Rif that gets a buff from mountains. They will get a buff on turn 0 from the Tell Atlas Mountain Range, making them slightly larger than other civilizations at the start. They will also have access to lots of coast and a healthy military. The Mountains will increase their production of Qaids, a Great General replacement, that gives maluses to enemy Great Generals during wartime! Not only that, but their Gatlin Gun replacement is an excellent long range unit come the later section of the game.
18) West Africa: Dahomey. Though I am partial to Senegal, Dahomey is doubtlessly the more militaristic and stronger choice that also prevents crowding on the coast. They have strong military uniques and a badass all-women warrior caste. I highly recommend them.
19) Nigeria: This region is a real tossup for choices. On the one hand, Nok under Sarki is an excellent civilization that was being developed for... a century or something. Then Sokoto is a great military civilization and would be an interesting successor to Benin. Then Nri by JFD is super memey. Then Nigeria is obviously the most popular choice and is not a bad pick either. This one, you have to decide on.
20) Congo Basin: Kasanje. Let's NOT have another Nzinga and have Kasanje Kulunga lead. They have a rapidly growing infrastructure and good gold maintenance, as well as a strong Swordsman UU that has bonuses against cities.
21) Horn of Africa: Somalia under Mohammad Siad Barre. TopHat hasn't gotten any love up until this point and he sorely needs it. Somalia is a civilization in a location we are not used to: The actual coast of the Horn. It will have the unique opportunity to settle the Arabian Peninsula, whilst also promoting a naval army through promotions and trade through the culturally prominent poets of Somalia, the Gabyaga.
22) The Great Rift Valley & Madagascar: Bunyoro. A lesser known Kingdom from western Uganda, this is one of CurlySnail's more interesting civilizations. This civilization will have direct access to Lake Victoria at the start, as well as a propensity to get strategic resources through infrastructure. The bonuses to gaining strategic resources are incredible, and make this early game civilization a survivor that will thrive in the African battleground. Shoutout to Tanzania though, Troodon's family is from there and he deserves respect.
23) Southwest Africa: Namibia. This is likely the most aggressive civilization of the bunch available. Though I want South Africa desperately and I love Seretse Khama, Namibia is the obvious choice for any voter. It's the civilization most likely to succeed, not the most likely to fail.
24) Southeast Africa: Lesotho. Honestly, the memes made me laugh and I like CurlySnail. eSwatini is cool and so is Mozambique but... You know what you need to do here.
25) Iran & Mesopotamia: The most painful region for me to choose... Iran under Ayatollah Khomeini. I hate that I had to choose between a Mesopotamian and Iranian civilization, but arguably this is the best option so that a civ like Jerusalem can succeed AS WELL as a civ in this region. They can expand West AND East without too much trouble, and it's a nice modern character that you can ascribe villainous traits to. Or good ones. I don't know what you like.
26) Arabian Peninsula: Bitch if you don't vote Qatar Imma throw a fit and steal your World Cup. No but honestly, it's the only civilization with an Airport as a Unique Building. It is also a rarity due to having a Combat Helicopter that acts like a Submarine. It makes a ton of gold, but more importantly it mass produces Oil. Therefore in the mid game, Qatar will have an excessive amount of Oil units that will make it a hard wall to fight against. I tested it, the AI is pretty decent, and it fights relatively well even when given a desert start.
27) Central Asia: The Zunbils. FIRE THEME. FIRE NATION ATTACKS. No but really PorkBean made this civilization with love and it is super GOlden Age oriented, something I have not recommended yet. Their UU is a powerhouse despite its short shelf life as a Longswordsman. They are constantly benefitting from the Medic promotion from their Unique Ability. For those that liked the Field Medic in Switzerland but obviously saw Clemenceau's France as the better option (who wouldn't?) then the Zunbils are right up your alley!
28) West India: The Punjab (JFD). It was a tossup between JFD's Punjab and the Sikhs, but the Sikhs lost me from their UB. The UB from JFD's Punjab is far better in my opinion. Vote either way, but the Punjab are inarguably better equipped here.
29) Eastern India & Tibet: Konbaung. Are you fucking serious bro? You're telling me you'd rather have the memey Bhutan over the GUYS WHO CAN MOVE THEIR CAPITAL? Grow the fuck up bro, this is the civ.
30) South India: Chola. A tossup between three civs. One uses faith for cultural great people, one was used in MK2, and then one is a naval power. I chose the naval power, you should too. Also, Tamil Kings.
31) Central Siberia: I know I plugged the PA-RG way earlier in the post, but the Ket are close to my heart and are one of my favourite new civilizations. It is simple but also expansive and we need some civilizations that go easy on the coding for something less bombastic. The Ket fulfill a need for a simple hero.
32) Mongolia: Yenesei-Kyrgyz. For a cool, grey civ to support your mute colour needs, vote for Yenesei-Kyrgyz! It has CULTURE and MOBILITY. Honestly that's it. Don't pick Xiongnu cause it's stupidly overpowered when it comes to settling and Bogd Khan is too peaceful.
33) East Siberia: Primaurye. It's in my opinion EW's best civilization. It is fun to watch it build Rats and gets a rare bonus to puppeting cities rather than occupying them, which is uncommon amongst civilizations. It's a cool concept. Definitely put MayorS Chukchi behind that though. Then Senshi's Chukchi. Then put everything else away.
34) Korea and Manchuria: South Korea under Park Chung-Hee (Chrisy15). It's one of my favourite civilizations to play, not just watch. I like the other options here except for one. You know how you as a player starting Civ 5 when you were first learning hated seeing Douchey Alexander the Great come up on his horse going "WOAH!" and then he got a diplo victory cause fuck you? Yeah, that's how I feel about the Manchu. I wish to reiterate that I know better than everyone my opinion is the word of God.
35) Japan: Kanto. That has been my pick since the MK3 voting and I am sticking with it. Homusubi rules. But if you don't like Kanto, Iga is pretty cool and has NINJAS bro.
36) Northern China: Great Jin. It's the best military civ on this list by a landslide. Consider Firaxis China for vanilla representation though.
37) Eastern China: Wuyue. It's a naval civ that can give the Japan pick a run for its money, or a civ in Oceania if one is nearby. It is a different take on what an Eastern China civ should be, and I appreciate the flavor.
38) Southern China: Vietnam under Ho Chi Minh (Chrisy15). We do not have many modern civilizations in the Asia theatre, especially amongst my picks (of which Qatar and South Korea are the only ones). Vietnam offers a unique style for the game, which siphons production from rival civilizations, and has a siege unit that can move through Mountains. It would do well against its more Northern enemies, and also balances the Southeast because it allows me to take my Vanilla pick...
39) Southeast Asia Siam. My Vanilla pick is Siam. It has an awesome expansion bias but is not too powerful militarily. It has elephant units. Vote for my cherubic boy Ramkhamhaeng.
40) Northern Indonesia: Malacca. Whilst Lanfang is one of the more interesting picks and definitely is inarguably the best AI wise (Singapore, Malaysia, and Brunei are all INFAMOUSLY bad), Malacca is also good. It is my pick because it is made by a relatively new and passionate modder that I want to support. Also Malacca in Greek means "King of Masturbators" so I get a little giggle every time I read it. Choose Lanfang if you don't like Malacca, but you know what the right decision is.
41) Southern Indonesia: Dutch East India Company. Do you know how long I have been waiting for this damn civilization to come out? Like at least a year. And now that it's out, we can use it! Batavia will live on as the Jewel of the Netherlands! But also the Firaxis Indonesia has been used before and the Timor-Leste AI and TSL is dogshit for domination games (but has been pretty memey in the Lefon Royale so give it a look). I think giving this civilization a chance is not unreasonable.
42) Western Australia: Anangu... I guess?
43) Eastern Australia: Australia under Billy Hughes (Senshidenshi). No but seriously a militaristic Australia would be exciting. Idk I don't have much thought on Australia as a whole. Wiradjuri is a good second choice though.
44) Northern South Pacific: Chamorro. It's a middle ground. I don't find Palau to be the best choice in an AI game, nor Nan Madol. The Philippines all have great options; however, they are too close to Wuyue for my comfort. If you want a Philippines however, I would choose Aguinaldo by Cardboard.
45) Southern South Pacific: Tahiti. Tahiti has extreme bordergore meme qualities, but is also an extremely well versed AI. I am speaking from experience. I saw Tahiti mass produce units and slam into larger civs like a meat grinder till there was a winner. Second for me here is Bora Bora. Third is Samoa.
46) Alaska and Canadian Arctic: The Aleut under Tukux (MayorS). This is arguably the more powerful Aleut based on uniques. It would have a good midway between Asia and Alaska, and would be able to settle more valuable land in Siberia than the mountain clustered Alaska has to offer. I favor its chances more over most civilizations in this category in spite of their one tile island start, though the Tlingit are obviously a great second that would be a North American contender.
47) Pacific Northwest: The Chinook. One of my favourite civs of all time, I will put them over the Shoshone automatically. The Coast Salish are the other interesting pick here but... Come on, I wanted a Haida vs. Chinook fight in CBRX and you only gave me half of it. Give me the other half in this mark. Pretty please?
48)Southwest American Desert: The Deseret (JFD). One of my other favourites and probably the most religious civilization in the continent, the Deseret will probably found Mormonism. And Mormonism is just plain awesome. Aside from that, the Deseret have pretty good growth and mobility, which is pretty surprising. I like them. A good second pick is the Tongva, though.
49) Northern Great Plains: Three Affiliated Tribes. It's one of my favourite civs. Whilst I like the Cree and find their abilities really cool, the Black Mouth and the rapid growth from the Earth Lodge by TAT is too impressive to look over. Honestly flip a coin between TAT and the Cree though and either choice is perfect.
50) Central Great Plains: Osage. It has a pretty unique and decent design, as well as an aesthetically pleasing colour scheme. I like it, you like it, we like it. Also Gragg9 is a badass in the community and he practically took over the Power Rankers when there was a huge deluge. I wanna give him the support.
51) Southern US: The Cajuns (Senshidenshi). It is a great resource focused civ and I want Cajun memes. Make it happen, voters.
52) Eastern US: America under James K. Polk (Uighur_Caesar). Polk is one of my favourite presidents and he is one of the few America AIs that can manage to win a damn AI game! He has cannons and conquering bonuses! Damnit, I want the U S of A to get a goddamn moment in the sun! We didn't even get it last time because of the FDR v. Fillmore fight!
53) Eastern Canada: Vermont Republic (RawSasquatch). I honestly would have originally argued the Neutrals or JFD's Canada under Mackenzie King, but this post made me see the light. https://www.reddit.com/civbattleroyale/comments/fli7cw/this_is_how_bernie_can_still_win/
54) Central America: The Olmecs under U Kix Chan (Leugi). I have wanted these Olmecs since the MK3 vote. They are science guys that build big heads and beat things up to get more science. They have fun.
55) Caribbean: Cuba under Fulgencio Batista (Uighur_Caesar). I'm going to get flack for this. I want a corrupt despot in the Caribbean, and I am going to push this guy to the MOON if I have to. But if I can't do that the Taino are qt.
56) Colombia: Medellin Cartel. The King of Cocaine would be a great callback to the Buccaneers of MK2. It would certainly be a different experience, and I want to try them out. Ask me sometime to tell you about my cocaine story.
57) Amazonian Coast: Marajoara. It's really the best military option and has growth opportunities after cutting down any jungle it's in. It's my pick. Trinidad & Tobago are a good second though.
58) Brazil: Quilombo dos Palmares. I like the idea of a group of slaves learning capoeira and fighting against slavers. I also like how it inspired the ginga style of football for the Selecao. I also like that it can steal settlers rather than turn settlers into workers. I also like the idea of capturing enemy units. I like the Palmaristas.
59) The Andes: Peru-Bolivia. You get the best parts of Peru AND Bolivia in Peru-Bolivia. Their Gatling Gun UU is a cool symbol to empower women cause Rabona are badasses. Their trade power also gets stronger the more capitals they conquer. That is a nice snowball that does not get too out of control... Except for in a 61 civ AI game but that's fine.
60) Gran Chaco: Paraguay under Solano Lopez (Uighur_Caesar). I just want a civ with a 14 on their Aggression bias lmao.
61) Patagonia: The Mapuche under Lautaro (Leugi). I like the Mapuche. They fight really hard and then make a lasting impact if their units are killed. They are protesting in Chile for their rights. The Mapuche kick ass. Vote for the Mapuche. Do it.
Holy FUCK that took forever. Anywho thanks to all the modders who made the civs that are available to vote for, you all have done an excellent job at making these civs and thanks for having a laugh but also a serious look at some of the civilizations on the table for the voting, which is starting tomorrow. Best of luck to everyone's favourites.
submitted by jmangelo67 to civbattleroyale [link] [comments]


2020.03.12 18:36 CatherineConstance Oh my Darling (Part 1)

I'm going to tell you something that I have never told anyone before. My name is Connor, and I'm 26. Five years ago, when I was 21, I found something. I haven't been able to stop thinking about it since, and I want to tell someone. Maybe I'll be able to sleep at night again if I do.
I live in Anchorage, Alaska. Michigan is known as The Land of 10,000 Lakes, but Alaska has more, over 3 MILLION, in fact. About 1.5 hours north of Anchorage lie Nancy Lake, Big Lake, and Long Lake, three of the most popular lakes for families up here to have cabins on. Lots of my friend's families had cabins growing up, so I've been up to those lakes before, mostly Big Lake, but hadn't been up there since high school. When I was 20, I got hired with the State Troopers, and one of my first solo "missions", as we liked to call them to make ourselves feel more important, was to find a tumbledown cabin on Nancy Lake, one of the ones that could only be accessed by boat.
We had a vague map of the area where this cabin supposedly was; neighbors from around the lake claimed that the property had been abandoned for years, and that the cabin should be either refurbished or torn down so that it could be sold, as it was apparently a good plot of land. But as my unit questioned more and more people around the lake, it became clear that none of them had ever actually been to the cabin or even the dock leading to the property. When we asked why not, and how they could be so sure that the property didn't have an ownewas empty, they gave vague answers, almost like they were embarrassed.
"Oh it's empty, all right," Russell O'Flanigan told us in the spring of 2015. "We know that for a fact." Russell and his wife Elaine lived on the lake for about six months out of the year, spending the rest in Sun Valley Idaho.
Very few people live on the lakes year round. The closest real town is almost an hour in one direction, the closest school about an hour in the opposite direction. Most of the cabins are weekend and/or summer homes for people from Anchorage and throughout the state, then there's a few people who stay a little longer like Russell and Elaine, and fewer still who actually, truly LIVE in the cabins on the lake. After some scouting through our databases, me and my partner Casey found one such man: George Tylerson, a 71 year old ex-CIA operative who lived less than a mile northeast of the area where the supposed abandoned property was.
Many of the cabins are accessible by road, but like the abandoned property, George's place was accessible only by boat or by hiking through the rugged terrain surrounding his property. George had a home telephone, and though he didn't sound excited to talk to us, he agreed to have Casey and I out to his place one crisp March morning, about a week after we'd spoken with the O'Flanigan's and any other residents we could find.
Casey and I took a motorized raft that the department used for river rescues from the Marina to George's property. His "cabin" was more like a mansion, a three story, gorgeous home built into the side of a cliff. The dock was old but sturdy, and as we docked our raft, I felt better about the whole thing. I had been nervous to meet George; he had a reputation for being, well, an asshole. Mollie, a 17 year old girl from a nearby town who worked at the convenience store at the Marina told us that George had moved out here after being driven out of a popular Anchorage neighborhood for being a jerk and a creep to his neighbors. But when
George met us at the end of the dock and began to lead us up the trail to the beautiful house, it seemed to me like he was just a paranoid old man.
He had surveillance cameras lining the awnings of the home and all along the dock, and he moved and spoke like he was suspicious of us, even though we were the State employees heading into this strange man's house. George spoke at length about his career - what he was allowed to speak of, at least - and said several things that confirmed my suspicions that the man trusted no one. After this telling introduction, and after George unceremoniously presented us with a pot of hot water and several varieties of tea bags, we sat in his spacious, mostly empty dining room, and got to work.
"So," Casey cleared his throat and glanced around the house. An orange cat laid on a landing above us in a beam of sunlight. George held his mug with both hands and sipped his licorice tea. "Have you ever seen the abandoned property?" The property in question had no name, because no deed could be found anywhere to tell us who owned it, and since no one, including us, had been anywhere near it yet. George nodded.
"Much as there is to see, yeah. I don't leave often." He gestured towards the kitchen, whose shelves were lined with home-canned food. "I grow most of my food myself, can it, fish in the winter a bit. But don't need much. I go to the Marina about once every six months to get supplies for Chester," he gestured again, this time to the cat. "But that's about it. Otherwise I don't leave 'less I have to." I sighed, trying to hide my disappointment. George had been the only full time resident we could find, and it was seeming like we weren't going to get any new information out of him.
"Do you know why..." Casey trailed off, trying to decide how to phrase what he was about to say. "Why... People complain about that property? If no one goes anywhere near it?" George laughed then, it was more like a guffaw, and it jolted Chester awake.
"It's 'cause they're scared." George rolled his eyes and didn't say anything else. We waited for a moment before Casey pressed on.
"Scared of what?"
George shrugged. "Don't know. Been trying to figure out what, actually. But Billy Porter, little kid whose family has a place right near the Marina, I heard him talking about oh... maybe three months ago. Yeah, that sounds right, because it was around New Years. People come up here around then because fireworks are legal up here. Anyway. I was at the Marina buying some black eyed peas, and I heard him talking to his parents. They wasn't listening to him though, so unfortunately he didn't say much. Billy's like... Oh I don't know, maybe six? Seven? Don't know. But his older brother Kyle is older, maybe fifteen or sixteen.
And Billy was saying that when Kyle took him out on the Jet Ski, they got pretty close to that property. And they heard someone singin', that old song eh... How's it go...? Oh my darlin', oh my darlin', oh my darrrrlin' Clementine... That one," he continued.
"So they heard that singin', and Kyle steered them a little closer, and Billy said he saw someone in the reeds off of the shore. But his parents brushed him off, and I heard them saying he and Kyle had both gotten sick, Billy had puked in the water right off the side of the Jet Ski, and Kyle had a blinding headache and was barely able to get them home. I wanted to know more, but that was all I heard. Say, update me will ya? If you find anything else out?" We said we would, and then we hastily took this new lead and left. As we pulled away from the dock, we saw George watching us from his large picture windows.
We set off towards the Marina, but on the way back, we decided to try to find the property, just so it would be easy to get back to later. It actually wasn't that difficult to find - the dock was old and rotting and the house was set way back from the lake, but you could still see it from the lake. Then the first strange thing happened. Casey steered our raft towards the old dock, while I fiddled with the notes I'd taken from George's house. I wasn't paying attention, when suddenly I felt the raft starting to slow down. We weren't to the dock yet, so I glanced back at Casey. His face was white as a ghost, bordering on green tinted, and he was breathing hard, inhaling big gulps of air.
"Case? You alright?" I asked, shoving the notes back into my pack. He nodded.
"I just got really nauseous suddenly," he said between gasps. "Seasick probably." No sooner were the words out of his mouth that he leaned over the edge of the raft and vomited.
"Jesus Case! Okay, lay down," I propped up our bags and jackets and eased him into a half sitting, half laying down position. As soon as he was settled and I reached for the gear shift, however, a sharp pain rocketed around the back of my head and settled behind my left eye.
"Agh!" The noise involuntarily came out of my mouth as I let go of the gear shift and grasped my head. "What the fuck..." I muttered, massaging my eye socket as best I could.
"It's your head, isn't it..." Casey moaned. "This has gotta be a... I don't know, a placebo. George told us what those kids said and now we're experiencing it." It was hard to think with the pounding pain in my head, but I realized that Casey was most likely right. Although it was strange that I got a headache and he got nauseous, why wouldn't both things happen to each of us? A worse thought crossed my mind too: maybe something on the property was toxic, and that was what was making anyone who got near sick. If that were the case, it likely wouldn't be long before whatever it was seeped into the lake as a whole, or contaminated the water supply. I voiced these concerns to Casey, and we decided to grab a water sample from where we were on the lake and turn back. We knew where the property was now, so we would be able to find it easily if we came back the next day. I scooped a sample of water from the side of the boat where Casey hadn't puked, and then started up the engine.
But then I stopped. Because I could have sworn that when I revved the engine, I heard something. I strained to listen, and when Casey asked what I was doing, I shushed him. It sounded almost like humming. But then I heard it: "...lost and gone forevvvvverrrrr..." I involuntarily shivered, and at that moment Casey retched again over the side of the boat.
"What's up?" He asked through his gagging. "Why'd you stop, let's get out of here man!" His eyes were watery and rimmed with red.
"You didn't hear that?" I whispered, staring in vain at the dock and the little shoreline of the property. I could see the house set way back from the lake, but not well, it was more of a blur than anything else.
"Hear what?" He cocked his head at me, straining to see me through his own bleary eyes. He hadn't heard it.
"Nothing." I shook my head, started up the raft, and fought through the pain in my head to get us back to the Marina.
Once there, we both felt almost completely better, as far as our physical ailments went. But I was shivering and scared, because I had only two explanations for what had just happened. The first was that there was some kind of toxic, chemical leak or problem on the property, which would be an absolute nightmare for everyone involved. Likely the entire lake would be vacated, the local economy was collapse, people would become suspicious of the other nearby lakes, some people would likely sue the state.
The other option was better in terms of the rippling impact, but was something I had absolutely no idea how to deal with, and that was that something supernatural was going on. Now, I don't NOT believe in the supernatural. I was raised Catholic and still believe in many Catholic principles today, and I've always believed in otherworldly phenomenon like ghosts and spirits. But I had never encountered them, not once, and especially not in the context of my job. If I were to become convinced that something supernatural was going on, I would have to deal with it myself. I couldn't tell my commanding officer that the complaints were stemming from GHOSTS in the abandoned cabin.
Maybe it was because I didn't want the economy to collapse and the lake to be vacated, or maybe I had a feeling that it was the latter option, but for whatever reason, as Casey and I disassembled the raft and got in the truck to head back to the outpost where we had an office set up for this mission, I began mentally preparing myself to go back to the cabin alone. I didn't feel that I had a choice. I needed to investigate further, and I couldn't figure out a way to explain to Casey what I felt we needed to do and why. So I made the decision to become the idiot in every horror movie: I would go back to the possibly haunted (or chemically toxic), secluded place by myself, in the middle of the night. I knew it wasn't a good idea, but it was the only idea, and I had to do it.
So that night, after Casey was sound asleep with the TV on in our motel room, I left him a note saying that I couldn’t sleep and was heading to the diner across the street for a cup of coffee and a slice of pie. I crept out of the room, made sure I had all of the supplies I had packed up in the hour that I was waiting for Casey to fall asleep, and quietly got in the truck.
Once I got to the main road, I felt a little better and let out the breath that I had been holding since I started packing up to leave. I would be back within a couple of hours, hopefully, and Casey would never know I had left. When I got to the Marina, I parked off to one side, and hastily got the raft and my bag, and set off. The cabin was a little harder to find in the dark. Being early March, the sun still sets at a normal hour, so it was pitch black out by the time I got in the raft at 10:30pm. The moon was almost full, a fat, waxing gibbous surrounded by stars. The light pollution at the lakes is minimal, and it was a gorgeous night.
I found the cabin and cut the raft’s engine as I approached the dock. I braced myself for a headache or nausea, but felt nothing. I strained my ears, listening for the music; nothing. I scanned the shoreline, remembering George’s comment about Billy having seen someone. Nothing. So I docked the raft and grabbed my pack. As I headed up the dock, I scanned the little strip of sand that served as a “beach”, I could have sworn I saw a little sandcastle off to one side. But then the castle, or whatever it was, burst apart, crumbling around a little hermit crab that scuttled towards the dock. I sighed and continued up the dock to the dirt path that led up a little hill to the cabin.
The hill came to a crest at an open clearing. In the center of the clearing was a fire pit. To the left, the path continued down, eventually going back to the lake, but off to the sides over there I could see a little greenhouse and a shed. To the right was the cabin, and off behind the cabin was what looked like another shed or bunkhouse, and a fancy, nicely painted outhouse. The cabin looked old, but was in good condition. There was a small front porch and forward-facing windows covered in yellow curtains. Next to the front door was a plaque that read: “The Lee’s & The Halverson’s”. I stepped up on the porch and it creaked under my weight; I took a deep breath and tried the front door. It was either locked, or rusted shut, so I turned on my flashlight and hesitantly made my way around the cabin, looking for another door. Sure enough, there was a back door, directly back from the front door, and miraculously, it opened.
I paused before pushing the door open all the way, suddenly realizing that I was terrified. But there was no going back now, I was here, I had to investigate. So I pushed the door open and forced myself to step inside. My first thought upon entering was that I was pleasantly surprised. The cabin seemed completely normal, and other than smelling a little dusty, it seemed pretty clean too. Directly to my left upon entering was a little alcove with a washer and dryer, and then a few steps ahead of that, also to the left was a bathroom, and to the right, a bedroom. For some reason, the bedroom scared me, so I decided to check out the main living area first.
I walked quickly down the hallway towards the front door. To my left was a kitchen that looked very much like it came out of the late 80s or early 90s. It had ugly linoleum floors and quaint little cabinets and counters. There were pots, pans, and dishware put away on shelves, and a four person dining table in front of the windows on the front of the house. To the right was a living room with a fat brown couch and a well-worn recliner, two end tables, one that had a home telephone on it and one that had a few books stacked on it, and an old TV across from the couch, so old that it had tin foil wrapped around the antennas. In an open box in front of the TV were a bunch of VHS tapes, mostly children’s and teen movies. I picked up the house phone and listened to see if there was a dial tone, but heard nothing.
Feeling a little better, I headed back towards the bedroom, but stopped and instead went into the bathroom. The bathroom was surprisingly modern. The decor was early 90s like the kitchen, but there was a bathtub with a shower attachment, a toilet, and a sink. There clearly was, or once had been, running water here, so I wondered about the outhouse, but since there was a bunkhouse, and the plaque with two family names, I figured that maybe there were often many people up at this cabin at once. There was a water heater in the back corner, and a rack where a bunch of dry suits, of all different sizes, were hanging as if to dry.
With nothing else to check, I held my breath and entered the bedroom. Without thinking, I ran my hand along the wall until I found a light switch, and flipped it on. To my surprise, the light worked, and allowed me to see the room much more clearly. To the right when you walked in was a bunk bed, the top and bottom bunks were both queen sized and covered with thick, dark blue bedding. Across from the beds was a closet with a sliding door that was open, and inside hung two men’s flannel shirts. On the opposite wall, under a window, sat another small, old TV on a stand. A bedside table held a Dean Koontz book. I sighed, clearly I had been scared for nothing.
I sat down on the bed, trying to imagine who had sat there last, when I realized one side felt a little lumpy. My mind immediately flashed to stories of people finding dead bodies under the mattresses in their hotel rooms, and I jumped up and lifted the mattress all in one movement. There were no bodies, just a little book bound in burgundy leather. I grabbed it and let the mattress fall back down, which sent a cloud of dust into the air, so I took the book and headed back to the main room.
There was no insignia on the cover, but the first page said: “Satsy & Cece’s Diary - Do not read!” It was written in childlike handwriting. I began reading through the diary, which was filled with short entries by Satsy and Cece. I learned that they were twin sisters and that they were eight years old, but nothing else of value. The entries were dated, but without the year, so that didn’t help. “September 1” means nothing if it could be anywhere between 1980 and the present day. I was about to give up, the entries were all just about mundane things like the weather and kids at school, when, around the middle of the diary, I did find something of value:
June 19
We’re going up to the lake for Solstice! I’m so excited. Cece is asleep since she gets carsick, mama thinks that it’s weird that she gets carsick and I don’t, but I never have. So I’m writing in here because I’m excited! We have about 30 minutes left in the drive. Mel and Jordan and Lena and I think even Monica will be there too with uncle Marty and aunt Jean. Me and Cece Cece and I are super excited because Mel is gonna take us out on the wave runners. Okay well gotta go. Bye!
Sincerely, Satsy
June 19
I’m writing because Satsy wrote on the way up to the cabin and we made a packed that we would always both write on the same days. So I’m writing! Satsy convinced me to bring this journal with us, but I’m worried that Mel and Jordan are gonna steel it, they do stuff like that. But it’s okay I guess, their mostly good cousins. Ok I think this is enough of an entry to keep the packed of us both writing. Bye!
Yours truly, Cece
After reading this two entries, I scrambled through my bag to find my yellow Steno pad and a pen, and I hastily scrawled down some notes:
Then I resumed reading.
June 20
MELVIN MAURICE WUZ HERE
JORDAN JOSEPH WUZ HERE FIRST
Lena Lorraine was here ❤
June 20
UGH I TOLD Satsy they would steel our diary! And they did! That’s ok I guess though, there’s nothing that important in here. And it’s nice seeing them, Monica has been away at college, she is 18 now! Melvin is 16, Lena is 13, and Jordan is 10. I know because I asked them all this morning. Tomorrow our parents and aunt Jean and uncle Marty are taking the boat to the Marina to get some fireworks for solstice! And they’re leaving us here! Monica is in charge but she doesn’t really watch us, so Melvin will probably actually be in charge and he is fun! Ok I’m going to sleep now bye bye.
Yours truly, Cece
June 20
Cece is such a worry wart. R u reading this Cece? Ur a worry wart! I don’t care if they read our stuff. I’m excited about it just being us kids tomorrow too! Right now everyone is asleep except me and Monica. Cece and I are sleeping on a pad on the living room floor, Lena is curled up in the recliner, and Monica is supposed to be sleeping on the couch but she’s sitting behind it on the phone with someone. Mel and Jordan are in the bunkhouse, and I hear uncle Marty and my dad snoring from the bedroom where all the parents are. Tomorrow is the longest day of the year! Woo!
Sincerely, Satsy
June 21
It’s solstice! Our parents are leaving in an hour, and then we’re all gonna take the jet skis and wave runners out! I can’t wait! Cece can write her entry later but I’m just excited and I had to write it down!
Sincerely, Satsy
And then that was it. Shocked, I flipped the page, trying to find the next entry, but there wasn’t one. I shivered, something was wrong. I didn’t know these kids but I felt 100% certain that Cece would have written her entry, even if after that the two girls got bored and stopped using the diary. I tried to rationalize by telling myself that this was in no way an indication of anything bad happening, but my mind wouldn’t believe it. Something had happened, something bad, and whatever it was was the answer to EVERYTHING.
I grabbed my stuff, including the diary, and all but ran back to the raft, I had to do some research, and I had to come back in the morning with Casey. I realized that it was unlikely that I was going to be able to do this all by myself, and I needed to ask him for help.
I’ll continue this tomorrow, thank you so much for listening.
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2019.10.19 03:41 SuperDan000 The Kaga Saga 2 (Chapter 15): The Japan Campaign

Hey I posted this after the day after they found the wreck of Kaga. Neat! Now where was I? Oh right. Votes came in one what determines this chapter and the majority of you said, allow the Guardians of the Coral Sea to join Kaga, so there you have it. Enjoy.
“You know what? I still believe strength in numbers is a good strategy, so you can come with me back to Japan.” Kaga decided.
“How thoughtful of you. We want to make sure this sea is safe first, so only two of us will come.” Zuikaku said.
“And who will those 2 be?”
“Just me and Yorktown. Everyone else can handle themselves here.”
“Oh cool. I get to go on a new adventure.” Yorktown said.
“I am Shoho.”
“She said to wish you guys good luck on your journey.” Shokaku translated.
“Don’t worry Shoho, we’ll be back.” Zuikaku promised.
So two members of the Guardians of the Coral Sea joined up with Kaga’s fleet. Next stop: Northern Japan. While transiting there, they made a quick stop at the large artificial floating city that was still under construction near Fiji. The city was owned by Yamato Heavy Industries so you know something will happen there in a future story. The fleet was there to refuel as it had a Takao Bell, but since this was a special location, the Fiji Water was more readily available. Once they were done, they continued moving on towards Hokkaido and during their journey there, DJ Kongo was trying to finalize some lyrics for the upcoming song about Kaga.
From the port of Yokosuka
Came a carrier named Kaga
She came to save the day
Across the lands far away
A hero in the making
This is the story of the one
Cherry Blossoms are flying
And thus the battle has begun
Her name was Kaga
And this was her saga
Squadron: Sakura
The legend will live on!
“Wow, those lyrics are powerful. Once they become done, I will sing along with it with passion.” Kaga was impressed.
“Thanks, I stayed up all night just to jot it down.” DJ Kongo was glad it worked out.
“Just wait until we add the solo.” Hipper said
“I can’t wait to hear that.” Kitakami hoped.
“If it’s catchy, it might get me moving.” Zuikaku admitted.
“This is only the opening song for the album. There will be more.” Kongo promised.
Later in the day, the group had arrived at the northern shores of Hokkaido to refuel and rearm. Here, the leader of the Japanese Government in Exile, Taiho, was waiting for them. “You guys finally came. The situation has become more dire since the last time we spoke.” She greeted.
“Well sorry for the delay. We had a few errands that couldn’t be left unchecked.” Kaga apologized.
“It’s alright for now. Still, we need to break the siege at Otaru. We only have one shot at rescuing Nagato and her veteran forces. The UN provided us with a landing team to help push the Parallel's ground forces off this island.”
“Excellent, we should get going by now. We can’t just wait here.” Akagi urged.
“She’s right. Let’s move out right now.”
“Wilco.” Kaga said.
“Let’s show them who runs this country.” Zuikaku said.
After picking up a few escort ships and patrol boats, Taiho, and the 2nd UN Fleet came near the shores of Otaru. The Parallel had ground forces surrounding the city and Sapporo on 3 sides while their naval forces were pinning down Nagato’s forces along the coast.
“Listen everyone. If Otaru falls, nobody will be able to save Sapporo which is just behind this city’s borders. We break this blockade and we save the city.” Taiho claimed.
“I guess this battle will be the turning point of this war.” Yamato guessed.
“Who knows, but we do know that this battle would be enough to push the enemy off this island.” Yorktown calculated.
“What exactly are we facing?” Yahagi asked.
“Scouts have reported 1 battleship, 1 carrier, 3 light cruisers, and 6 destroyers. There’s also a handful of landing ships ready to make a beachhead if they break through.” Ark Royal reported.
“It’s a fairly small attack force. I guess Nagato’s fleet is on their last legs.” Hakuryu noted.
“Let’s begin the battle shall we? I’ve been itching for a fight like this.” Haida got a bit impatient.
“Slow down, let’s be cautious about this.” Hatsuharu reminded her.
“She’s right. All carriers, send out your bombers. Akagi, get your fighters up as well. We have a carrier in the midst. Commence Operation Shuffle.” Kaga ordered.
“So you’re charismatic as the people say. I can pull out a fighter compliment for you as well.” Taiho was impressed with Kaga’s leadership.
Meanwhile, within Nagato's forces, “We can’t give up now. We may be running low on ammunition and fuel, but we can just hold on for a little longer. I promise someone is out there looking after us.” Nagato tried to raise the morale in her fleet.
“What can we do? We’re the last ones left defending Japan. There is no hope we can get out of this one.” Aoba was about to give up.
“I’m almost out of torpedoes. We should just surrender already.” Shinonome lost all hope.
“This is Kaga of the United Nations 2nd Fleet, serving under the Japanese Government in Exile. Nagato, I heard your forces need a helping hand.” The carrier radioed in.
“Finally. We’re saved! Help has arrived. You hear that everyone? Push the Parallel out and give it your all!” Nagato was relieved.
“A lone wolf like me will make quick work of these Parallel pansies. Everyone who isn’t afraid, charge!” Ashigara commanded.
“You only live once I guess. Let’s follow her example and save the city!” Nagato ordered. “Kaga, what does your fleet possess?”
“7 carriers, 8 battleships, 2 large cruisers, 4 heavy cruisers, 8 light cruisers, 8 destroyers, 5 submarines and several escorts ships and patrol boats.” Kaga answered.
“Wow, that’s a lot. I’d imagine your air power is pretty large too. Make sure you crush the enemy.”
“Wilco. Momiji and Sugi Squadrons, make a mess of the fleet in front of us.”
“Red and Black Squadrons, you know what to do.” Hakuryu ordered her bombers.
A huge swarm of aircraft prepared their strikes on the unsuspecting Parallel ships. The 4 destroyers in front, preparing to intercept Ashigara, will be the first victims. The enemy carrier’s bombers noticed this and requested fighter support to intercept, but Sakura and Shinden Squadrons made sure to tie them up. The fleet in black was caught off guard of the situation.
“This is Mugenokaze, I’m hit and sinking! AHH!”
“What the hell!?” A nearby black painted destroyer was surprised.
“This is Kowaretakaze. Someone help us! I can’t take them all down!” One black Akizuki class destroyer desperately tried to dodge the attacks.
“My AA is not enough to take them down. How is this even possible!” The destroyer identified as Hageshikaze called out.
“No I’m sunk!” The other one labelled as Nisekaze went down.
“ARGHH!” Kowaretakaze was sunk.
“This is Sugi 6. 3 destroyers have been sunk on our first strike.”
“Excellent work. Return to base to rearm and refuel.” Kaga told them.
“So, you’ve finally returned here. You killed Atago and the zombie fleet. Very well then, it was merely just a test.” Asashio B discovered Kaga.
“The audacity you have to keep coming back to us. You should just give it up.” Kaga told the Parallel destroyer to stand down.
“I’ll never give up. The B Team will never give up.”
“You’re the only one left in your stupid team.”
“Oh I don’t think so. Recently, I got new friends to my team. Say hello to Sims, Scharnhorst and Graf Zeppelin. Together we make the new B Team!”
“Yeah! You best be getting out of our way. There will be nobody to stop us!” Scharnhorst B claimed.
“Last B Team didn’t get a carrier. Well now that’s changed. We have the skies now!” Graf Zeppelin B said.
“You wanna fight!? Well let’s go! Show me your moves!” Sims B was eager.
“I’ll show you how a good fight is done.” Haida wanted to fight her.
“Hakuryu and Taiho, get your planes to strike the light cruisers.” Kaga directed.
“What are we doing?” Akagi asked.
“Both of us are going after Graf Zeppelin B. Zuikaku and Yorktown can focus on other ships.”
Kaga directed her attack squadrons on the black carrier. Her secondaries were ferocious, and all the destroyers made sure not to get too close to her. Sakura Squadron made sure to intercept her bombers while Shinden Squadron tangled themselves with the interceptors. Momiji Squadron made several attempts to divebomb her but mainly missed or had barely made any penetrations with the hits they had. Sugi Squadron started to lose a few planes and Graf Zeppelin B made enough attempts to reduce damage from any hit she receives.
“Amazing. So this must be the full potential of the Graf Zeppelin.” Admiral Hipper noticed.
“Her secondaries are firing everywhere like any German battleship. I’ll try to set her deck on fire.” Friedrich der Grosse suggested.
“Kaga, my bombers are having trouble getting a steady aim on her. You think Sakura Squadron’s Pink Flight can do something about it?” Akagi requested.
“Sure thing. Ark Royal, time for another wish.” Kaga demanded.
“And what will the wish be?” Ark Royal asked.
“I wish to see the vulnerable weak spots of Graf Zeppelin B.”
“Wish granted.” She sent out a Swordfish which dropped a little bomb over the Parallel carrier. It exploded over her and revealed the armour model of the ship. Kaga can see the weakspots now and directed her 4 best fighters to attack the certain sections. First came Sakura X, the Kikka, to soften up the flight deck with the laser given to him by Yamato.
“Laser fired. Focusing the energy on her flight deck.” Sakura X reported.
“AAAAHHHHH!!!!” Graf Zeppelin B screamed.
“Thanks for the opening, her deck got thinner because of that. Bombs away!” Sakura 0 called out. Two armour piercing bombs fell straight through the deck and destroyed Graf Zeppelin B’s hangar.
“My turn!” Sakura 2 followed with regular bombs and dropped them into the opening. The carrier sustained further damage.
“Time to finish this.” Sakura ∞ said before dropping his bombs into the area where the ammunition was stored. Graf Zeppelin Blew up in a sea of flames with her deck being ripped off of her. The faint sounds of her scream could be heard.
“Looks like another B team vessel sunk by me.” Kaga claimed.
“Dammit! Our air power is lost. Oh no! Our cruisers are dead too!? B Team, we need to retreat.” Asashio B ordered.
“No way, I was just about to have fun.” Sims B was upset.
“It’s that damn cherry blossom being flown from that false Kaga!” Scharnhorst B was angry.
“Fire!” Nagato shouted.
Ashigara scored multiple hits on the transport ships that the Parallel forces had. Aoba also managed to tag Scharnhorst B with a shot. The B Team was now back to 3 members. They had no choice but to pull back.
“I’ll provide artillery support for our ground forces. The Parallel’s land forces are about to pull back too if we continue the pressure.” Kii said.
“Wow! We did it. That was much easier than I expected. Our landing teams are already making progress too.” Taiho was impressed.
“Thank you Kaga and your fleet. Without you, we would have never stood a chance. You helped push the Parallel off this island but the war is not over yet. If we can recapture the Ominato Guard District, we will have a good landing point for our ground forces to retake Honshu. From there, we should be able to make a spearhead towards Tokyo.” Nagato explained.
“And maybe we can rescue some prisoners who have captured in the following ports we liberate.” Ashigara believed.
“It was a tall order, but I’m glad we succeeded. Now let’s take back our nation.” Kaga proclaimed.
TO BE CONTINUED...
Alright, next chapter is going to be an action packed one as the team slowly gets closer to Okinawa and we can finally end the series because I'm going to lose my energy when this is over. Also I kinda predicted Alaska B but I killed her off so that's why you don't see her here. Toodles.
Previous chapter: The Floating Dead
Next chapter: Tokyo Liberation Front
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2019.09.18 20:13 SuperDan000 The Kaga Saga 2 (Chapter 11): Canal Rush

Yello. I'm back with another chapter of his grand adventure of a long story. I don't really have much to say right now so here is the chapter for my loyal readers.
The Kaga Fleet was headed for the Suez Canal. While transiting, Kamikaze R and Kaga were discussing racing techniques.
“Thank you for teaching me the techniques for drifting in open waters Kaga. I’ve learned a lot but still have no chance of mastering it on your godly level.” Kamikaze R thanked the carrier.
“It’s no problem. After all, I learned from the best. The superpowers sorta helped too.” Kaga whispered the last part back.
“By the way, who exactly taught you how to drift as a carrier?” The hopeful racing destroyer asked.
“Ah. I learned it from none other than my best friend, Akagi.”
“What? Me? I don’t remember any of this. When did I teach you how to drift?” Akagi was bewildered.
“When we were young, you taught me combat maneuvers for evading air attacks. One time, you taught me how to turn very hard that our hulls would slip sideways across the water. In a sense, it was drifting.”
“Huh. You have a point. Although, I’ve never seen you do such a maneuver, yet alone do one that is more elaborate than what I taught you.”
“As I said, the superpowers enhanced my maneuverability.”
“I guess you can show me when we get home.”
A little while later, the 2nd UNF made their way to the outskirts of Port Said, the northern gate to the Suez Canal. Here, a battleship, a light carrier and a group of destroyers were grouping together for a battle plan. Kaga greeted them.
“Ah, Kaga, we’ve been anticipating you. I’m Admiral Nelson of the Royal Navy. I am the one in charge of the northern assault team in retaking the canal.”
“I see. Are you telling me that there is another team coming from the south end?”
“You are correct. Hood is responsible for leading the charge at the city of Suez. In this two pronged offensive, we should be able to round up all the ships of the Parallel and force them to sink or surrender. They shouldn’t be able to escape as long as one of the flanks do not collapse. Once we clear them out, the canal will return in our hands.”
“Is that really all?” Kaga could not believe how simple it was.
“Not really. We got reports that a flotilla of ships is currently trapped in the Great Bitter Lake. Most of them civilians. The Parallel also has land forces. Be on the lookout for on shore artillery that can fire on us as we pass through. The canal offers little for us to maneuver.”
“Who will handle the land forces?”
“Multiple transports carrying tanks and APCs will land on the shoreline. They will travel along the canal with us as we make our way through. The battle will be fierce, but we have no other option for avoiding direct confrontation. Since you are a carrier, however, this operation will be much easier as long as air support is present. Our reports have found no carriers in the area.”
“Sounds good to me. Haida, Kamikaze R, Udaloi, and Le Fantasque, you guys are leading the way. Nelson, who did you bring with you today?” Kaga asked.
“I have Perseus as my light carrier support. 4 other destroyers acting as my escort. Jervis, Acasta, Jutland and Cossack.”
“Ah, my British sister is here.” Haida was glad to hear the name.
“Haida, it’s been a while. You ready for a long day of fighting?” Cossack greeted.
“Hey Perseus. Remember me?” Kitakami asked the carrier.
“Oh right. You’re Kitakami, the cruiser who helped the Princess of Hong Kong. I remember you helping us during Offensive Campaign 444. Those were good times. I’ve since gained experience from that event. It’s an honour to serve beside you again.” Perseus was pleasantly surprised.
“Oh this is interesting. Another witness for my new piece about Kitakami’s history as a mercenary.” Cleveland tried to write it down. “I’ll try to ask more questions about you after this.”
“Hood, can you read me? I have Kaga and her fleet with me. Commence Operation Fencer.” Nelson radioed over.
“Hood here. Glad to hear the good news. Southern forces are now moving ahead. Let’s make sure we meet halfway.”
“Alright, that was the signal. Cossack and Jervis, move up front and hold the formation. We’ll approach the first line of defence.”
“Momiji and Sugi Squadrons, you are to launch immediately. Other carriers with me, launch your strike aircraft too. You can use torpedo bombers but their torpedoes can only be dropped along the length of the canal. Trying to get one off across the width of the canal is not possible.” Kaga ordered her carriers.
“I have a few Skuas aboard. They are the only planes not made by Fairey so they can kill.” Ark Royal noted.
“That’s great. Launch your Swordfish if I request a wish to be granted.”
“Will do.”
Kaga then launched her lead flight of fighters from the Sakura Squadron. She thought a light fighter escort would be enough. Sakura 0, 2 and ∞ were equipped with bombs. X still had his laser. Akagi responded by letting her lead flight of the Shinden Squadron to go up as well. Hakuryu launched 5 A8Ms from her Yellow Squadron. Perseus launched some Seafires.
“This mission is crazy. Big ships like us are going to take several hits from tanks and artillery along the shore. We have nowhere to move.” Missouri whined.
“Toughen up kid. You have armor. Just respond with overwhelming firepower.” New Jersey reminded.
“Yeah I know. We have the big guns and we can’t lose but I seriously care about my image too. I don’t want any damage here.”
“I travelled up a river and got shot at plenty of times. You just need to be aware if you want to survive.” Kitkami bragged a bit.
“Easy for you to say.” Missouri complained.
“Listen up, we are approaching Port Said. This is the first line of defense. There is no turning back once we make it through. Sink anybody in our way and destroy any hostile targets trying to stop us. Our troops should land shortly after we break through.” Nelson warned.
“It’s go time.” Kii said.
The first group to oppose them was a small division of black Clemsons. Black and Belfast were quickly dispatched and sunk all 4 immediately. Next came the gun batteries aimed at them. Sovetsky Soyuz and Friedrich der Grosse suppressed them. This allowed the landing ships to reach the shores and deploy their tanks and assorted armoured vehicles. With a strong enough foothold in the city, Team Nelson charged ahead and fired at anything hostile. Nelson’s and Kaga’s Fleet made it through the point of no return. Now it’s up to the aircraft to scout ahead and suppress any obstacle standing in their way. This attack alerted the Parallel forces further up the canal. They attempted to intercept the liberators. Parallel Tanks tried to move up and fire at the destroyers. Kaga and the carriers responded with their dive bombers. Armoured units then took notice of the 4 fighters in the Sakura Squadron.
“It’s the Cherry Blossom. He’s here!” An enemy tank feared.
“What!? He’s here!? Everyone, try to shoot him down!” A black painted Minekaze ordered.
“Whoa, looks like they know about me.” Sakura 0 was surprised by all the anti air weapons being fired at him.
“Don’t worry, we got your back.” Sakura 2 said. “All their attention towards you is merely a distraction.”
Momiji Squadron made their dives towards their targets and destroyed them with their bombs.
“This is Momiji 2. All tanks and AA guns in the vicinity are destroyed. We even sank a destroyer.”
“Excellent work. Come back to rearm. We still have a ways to go before we meet halfway with Hood.” Kaga congratulated.
The destroyers up front noticed something small approaching them from the distance. It was not a destroyer but a large boat moving at high speeds. It appeared unarmed but as it got closer, they were sorely mistaken. The boats were laden with high explosives. The first one crashed into Cossack and exploded, ripping off her bow.
“AAHH!! I’m hit. WHat the fuck was that!?” She screamed.
“Suicide boats? How barbaric of the Parallel.” Nelson was angered.
“Look out. They’ve got more coming our way.” Jervis warned.
“Shimakaze, Le Fantasque and Tashkent. Can you guys merge together and stop the boats from getting close?” Kaga requested.
“Yes we can. Fast 3! Merge!” Le Fantasque called out. The 3 fast destroyers joined themselves together and glowed a bit before fusing together into one super destroyer. They were now a Capitani Romani class flotilla leader. The merged ship pushed ahead and fired at anything coming down towards them. Planes from Sugi Squadron spotted a pair of Frigates and prepared to engage them when suddenly, a Hellcat swooped by and shot some of them down.
“What was that!?” One B5N was caught surprised.
“This is Sugi 5, I’m going down!”
“Sugi Squadron, status report!” Kaga needed to know. “What is going on up there?”
“Enemy fighters. The Parallel has aircraft we didn’t know about. This isn’t part of the plan!” Sugi 10 reported.
“They’re Hellcats. We stand no chance against them. Send the Pink Sakuras to help!” Sugi 2 requested.
“Hellcats… Does anyone see what insignia these planes bear?” Kaga asked again.
“This is Sugi 4. The planes have a bald eagle emblem.”
“That’s not good.” Sakura 0 was alerted.
“Oh no. All aircraft be warned. It’s the Eagle Squadron operating off of Enterprise.” Kaga warned.
“If it’s just the fighters, that may not be a big issue. However, this is a carrier attacking us. She could be deploying her bombers against us.” Akagi gave her thought.
“Sakura Squadron intercept!” Kaga ordered her fighters.
“Wilco!” Sakura X complied.
“C’mon rookie, time for another intense air battle.” Sakura 2 told Sakura ∞.
“Target is in my sights.” An Eagle Squadron member could be heard. The fighter unleashed a barrage of rockets at Acasta.
“Agh! Damage is critical! I’m pulling back!”
“All ships, focus your efforts on your AA!” Nelson ordered.
“Sakura 0 here, enemy bagged.” The zero said as he downed a Hellcat.
“This is Spades. The Suits in Shinden Squadron thought you need an extra hand.”
“Appreciate the help. Would you mind dealing with those Helldivers approaching our allies?”
“Leave it to me.” Hearts accepted the order.
Overhead, a massive air battle took place as the sips continued to move down the canal. Beside them were the land forces fighting their way through the checkpoints with the batteries of every ship taking down the bunkers blocking the paths of the tanks. If a ship tried to approach them, the vanguard within Nelson’s force proceeded to intercept. About halfway to their designation, the battle got fiercer as more reinforcements showed up. Suddenly, a large cruiser appeared before them. It was an Alaska painted in black. She was escorted by two black fletchers in the front and rear.
“So you’re the ones who have caused the ruckus. I wouldn’t expect anything more from you. Especially now that I know the false Kaga is within your ranks. Luckily, your planes seem to be all tied up. Now prepare to sink all of you! Name’s Alaska by the way.” The large cruiser introduced herself.
“So this is my evil parallel universe twin.” The real Alaska noted.
“Deploying smokescreen!” Belfast called out.
“Hey what are you doing? We can’t see anything.” Jervis said.
“Oh we have a plan if you didn’t know.” Black mentioned.
“Hey Iowas, you don’t happen to be packing any special weapons do you?” Nelson asked.
“You mean cruise missiles?” New Jersey wanted to confirm.
“Those would be fine.”
“Watch closely Alaska. This is how the big girls do it.” Iowa told Alaska.
“Radar activated.” Missouri called out. “Aim for sector G2.”
“Iowas, launch the Tomahawks!” New Jersey ordered. Cruise missiles were fired out of the Iowa class battleships and through the smokescreen Belfast laid out. They could hear the screams of the black Alaska followed by several blasts. When the smoke cleared, they found the wreck of the enemy Alaska and the escorting destroyers making a hasty retreat.
“Looks like we got a baked Alaska.” New Jersey joked.
“Hey that was my line.” Missouri whined.
“Hearts, you’re being tailed by enemy fighters.” Sakura ∞ pointed out.
“Eagle 1 to all units. Start by taking down the leader craft of the enemy’s core flight. We need to throw off their formation.” The lead enemy fighter could be heard.
“Roger. The navalized Shinden over there.” His friend spotted.
“They’re on me! 4 planes on my tail!” Hearts noticed.
“She’s not the leader. Shouldn’t the enemy by tailing us?” Sakura 2 was bewildered.
“We gotta help her out. There’s no way she can handle them alone.” Sakura ∞ suggested.
The rest of Shinden Squadron was trying to help their ally but the enemy maneuvered too well.
“Am I the only one they’re targeting?” Hearts worried.
“The enemy squadron is targeting the Shinden Squadron’s number 2 ace. Sakura Squadron, cover her.” Kaga ordered.
“All units, back up Hearts.” Akagi ordered as well.
“I shot one down.” Sakura ∞ confirmed. “3 more to go.”
“Not bad.” Hearts complimented. She then took a couple hits but was still airworthy.
“Hearts was hit.” Diamonds noticed.
“I’m not hit! I’ll recover.” She denied.
“Hearts, we need you to clear the airspace for now.” Sakura 0 wanted but the fighter refused.
“We can take of these hostiles for you.” Sakura X claimed.
“You just want to take my kills.” She continued to refuse.
“Quit being so cynical. I mean, you’re right, but…” Sakura 2 made a point.
“Listen Hearts, this is a life or death situation. We can have our little game later.” Sakura ∞ tried to convince her before shooting another fighter down.
“Roger, pulling back for now.” Hearts finally gave in.
Sakura ∞ then shot down a third fighter. He was getting much better as he gained experience. One more to go and it was the enemy flight lead, Eagle 1. The dogfighting between the 2 got intense and Sakura 0 avoided the engagement to watch what would happen. This was the rookie’s fight. Eventually, Sakura ∞ managed to get the first hit which left Eagle 1 trailing with smoke.
“He’s too much for me. Things aren’t going as planned. All aircraft withdraw!” Eagle 1 had enough.
Sakura ∞ decided not to pursue as he still needed to help escort the ships down the canal. Everyone could breathe a sigh of relief now.
“Hearts, report. Have you taken any damage?” Spades asked.
“No direct damage taken. I’m still airworthy.” Hearts acted tough.
“No need to play tough girl.” Sakura 2 reminded.
“Sakura ∞, I appreciate the backup. But next time, I don’t need you to interfere.”
“Oh, here we go.”
“Hey rookie, I can tell she secretly digs you.” Sakura 0 whispered over to ∞.
“I’d figure. I wouldn’t expect anything more about your vast knowledge, Teacher.” Sakura ∞ said.
Back on the ground, the ships and tanks were one obstacle away from the Great Bitter Lake. What stood in front of them was a large fortress with a gate preventing ships from easily getting through. The roads were heavily guarded which meant the land forces needed serious support to get through.
“Alright Kaga, this is where I need your input.” Nelson asked for an opinion. “We could either wear down this forts defenses and make a slow push, or we can charge through the door guns blazing, with the risk of being shot at from all directions. The latter option is quicker and can be done if we have sufficient air support. The choice is up to you.”
“This will be the biggest challenge of this campaign yet. With the strength of our combined air and naval power, I suggest we go for…”
TO BE CONTINUED...
This chapter is a voting chapter. You can have either the fleet charge right in, or play it safe. Choose wisely as it will affect the story. Option with the most votes wins. Bye.
Previous chapter: Breakout
Next chapter: Grand Fortress
submitted by SuperDan000 to WorldOfWarships [link] [comments]


2019.08.28 19:49 SledDogGuy Alaskan Guide, Trapper, and Monster Hunter

I have been a woodsman my whole life. Growing up in the state of Alaska, I've spent a great amount of time in the wilderness. Countless days tracking down massive bears, Moose, and caribou, Weeks at a time Mushing sled dogs across frozen rivers, and being a guide on the most difficult hunts taught me survival skills that most of my colleagues will only dream of. Which is why I have made my living off the land on a remote homestead in the Mat-Su valley south of Denali national park. Being considered one of the best hunter-trackers in a land full of them is what brought me to the attention of the F.B.I when they needed a very dangerous... animal, found and killed.
It was a cold winter day when I first met Special Agent Jones, I was just done feeding my huskies there a usual mix of hot water, salmon, and the best commercial dog food you can get. Trudging along towards my modest little log cabin to warm my cold body I heard the whining of a snowmobile engine coming up the trail. it was unusual to hear a snowmobile on a Tuesday with the weekenders gone home for the time being. So patiently waiting for it to continue west toward town it suddenly turned North, towards me, ten minutes later a smaller man wearing a fish and game winter jacket on a newer trail model pulling into my yard. The dogs, hearing a strange machine pull into the yard began barking and howling with glee. The man was clearly quite cold as he quickly killed the two-stroke engine and walked up to me. He pulled off his glove a stuck out his hand, I quickly took his hand and greeted the man.
"Special Agent Jones," he said. I looked at the man and seen instantly he was out of his element cold Hands, red nose and the constant shivers told me everything, So I said to this ill-prepared man.
"Come on inside, agent Jones, it's mighty cold out here. Once inside and seated with a cup of coffee, I finally asked "what would an F.B.I agent want with a Bush rat like myself." the man straightened himself and said,
"The F.B.I would like to employ your services as a tracker, sir." Huh, well I guess I was good at what I do but I wasn't expecting this.
" I see, and what exactly do you want me to track," I asked.
"Well, uh..." he stuttered, "We're not exactly sure".
"Not sure huh," I said, puzzled. He explained what happened, A couple of teenagers were found on the Old Pearl River, one with there skull smashed open and one with his chest crushed." no scratches, bites anything on them" I asked, in bewilderment.
"Not One," he said. "And where the hell is the Old Pearl river at."
He looked at me goofy and said "Louisiana."
"I've never been before," I said, "and I don't think I would do much good to you down there."
"But you will" He assured "we have been searching for the best woodsman in the country and we found you," He said confidently. "I'll be damned if I flew my happy ass up here, and froze my balls off on that snowmobile to go all the way back down south and settle for second best." He quipped'
"Well then, You got yourself a hunter then," I answered.
That is how I found myself alongside the old pearl river waist-deep in the swamp water sitting next to a swamp man named Shelby. Shelby was an alligator hunter that was hired for the use of his knowledge of the area and, more importantly, his airboat.
"You boys got anything yet," said Jake. Jake was a marine scout sniper until he was very recently recruited to be on this 'task force'.
"Sorry Jake, not shit," I told the sniper.
"Well let's pull out for the night, I'm freezing out here and my feet are wet" Jones whined.
"Fine" was all I said in return. Jones was Clearly more of a desk jockey than a field guy, but this was his team and he was determined to be with us every step of the way."
"Let's get going then" Shelby whispered. We quietly crept back to the airboat.
"You're back," said Sarah. Sarah is a cryptozoologist and agent Jones said she could be of some help.
"Yeah we are back, only been gone 6 hours" I retorted. Ignoring my sarcasm, she said
"I've been doing some research, and I think I know what we're dealing with."
Doubling down on my sarcasm. "What, you don't believe what Jones told the public, ya know a bear that crushes people instead of chewing em' up." She grinned and proudly stated
"Nope, not even a little." Shelby fired up the boat, went and picked up Jones and Jake and we all decided to regroup in the morning.
"Swamp Ape huh." Jake sneered. Sarah glared at him through her sunglasses and I spook
"Sure as shit wasn't a bear Jake, You saw the bodies."
"Yea, that wasn't no black bear." was the short, athletic man's only reply.
"How do we kill it?" Shelby asked.
"We don't" answered Sarah while staring at me, "We Trap it," she stated. Right then Jones got a call and went outside.
"How in the hell you gonna trap an 800 pound pissed off swamp monster?" Jake intelligently asked.
"To Trap an animal you must know the animal what it eats, how it walks, how intelligent it is, the way it thinks, among other things," I informed. Shelby then stated the obvious
"So back to square one, find the damn thing." Just then Jones came back to the table."We gotta go, right now," he ordered, "I'll explain on the way."
"Fucking aye" Jake cursed as we pulled up to the scene. 8 pigs dead, 5 smashed skulls, and 3 ripped throats. We got outta Shelby's old Ford truck and quickly investigated the scene. They all were killed maybe three hours ago and large, 3 toed tracks with webbed feet were heading towards the swamp. I told Jones that I should start tracking now and the others should go get Shelby's boat.
"I can't send someone out there alone, I'll go with you," he said.
"No you can't, someone has to stay and deal with the farmer and the press when they hear about this," I explained.
"Jake, what about you?" Jones questioned.
"I left my m40 at my room" Jake confessed.
"What about me?" Sarah asked.
"You ain't got no gun though," said Shelby.
"I'll borrow your pistol" Sarah replied.
"Fine with me, I guess" I approved. Jones simply nodded, and Shelby handed her his old 1911. I already had my .45 colt on my hip, so I pulled my Marlin 45-70 out of Shelby's truck and off into the swamp we went.
For 7 hours we tracked the beast through the swamp. It was clearly quite intelligent, as it made almost know tracks as it moved through the forest. Thus making my task very difficult. Finally, as we crept through the swamp, we heard a noise just ahead. I quickly motioned for Sarah to stay still. Then I saw the monster, It stood approximately 8' tall and roughly 400 lbs, The monster's arms had to be at least 5' long and the thing was covered in a reddish-brown fur. Almost the instant I saw the creature I smelled it. I had the horrible stench of rotten milk and wet dog. But the thing that seemed the strangest to me, was its eyes, red, and menacing, with a slight glow to them.
I put the lever gun against my shoulder and took aim. Sarah squeezed my right arm slightly. "Please don't?" she asked. I locked eyes with her and lowered my weapon with a slight sigh. The monster let out a deep, loud howl and continued into the swamp.
That night I laid in my shitty motel bed and thought about why I didn't shoot the monster, I mean, I had a clear shot, even if I told Jones that I didn't, and a 45-70, I could've dropped it before it knew what hit him. I arrived at the conclusion that I didn't take that shot because Sarah had asked me not too. Sarah, she was that kind of person. This whole time she had been trying to capture it, not kill. Needless to say after that night, I was much more interested in my new found profession, and my new partner.
"Perfect," said Jones.
"Hell yeah" Jake agreed.
"So he walks in, hits the tripwire and the gate falls and he can't get out?" Sarah confirmed,
"yep" was my reply. Earlier that morning I had designed a cage trap for our prey.
"Okay, Shelby take Jake into the swamp and find a good spot for this thing. I and you will go into town and get someone to start building this thing." Jones stated.
"What about me?" asked Sarah, "Find out as much as you can about our little friend and we'll meet up when I and Jones are done." Jones simply nodded in agreement with my statement.
"I couldn't find much out on our buddy, but from what I did find, it seems he's a swamp bigfoot, but meaner and with some serious b.o" Sarah said as she sat down next to me. She had decided to get a nicer hotel suite, so she wanted to meet here.
"In my experience, 'meaner' is really 'more territorial'. I softly corrected it.
"Either way, at least I'll have you there." She said with a smirk. "I'll protect you," I said in with a laugh.
"I don't need your protection, I just know I can run faster than you" she confessed with a laugh. I grinned and looked at the clock.
"I better get going," I told her.
"I'll show you the door" she offered. After stepping to the other side of the doorway, I turned to say goodnight, She softly grabbed my hand and said.
"Thank you, for the other night...you know...not shooting."
"Not a problem, Your welcome," I replied.
"Goodnight," she said.
"Goodnight Sarah"
"You really think it's gonna work?" Sarah asked quietly.
"It will" was all I said in return. The plan was simple, we had figured out he is like a bear, in that he likes his food rotten. It was seen digging up those pig carcasses and carrying one back into the swamp. So, we dug up the rest and are using them as bait. After about 5 hours of waiting, the beast finally showed itself slowly sulking out of the swamp, about 25 yards directly in front of Sarah and me. "Eyes on" I whispered into the radio to Jake and Jones on the opposite side of the trap. The beast rose up and sniffed the air, looking for danger. A slight snap came from my right side. I looked to see Sarah had tripped, and she was now scared shitless. Turning my eyes back to the best I found those big, red eyes were locked on me, as soon as we locked eyes, it charged. I had an idea that I prayed would work.
I motioned Sarah to stay down and started running towards the trap, 25' away. I heard chasing after me, but it was gaining fast. I got directly in front of the trap door. I whirled around to see it had caught up, he leaped towards me, but I dodged him. He spun around to face me and, with his back now to the door, his face was met with the butt of my rifle. He fell backward into the trap, triggering it, The iron gate dropped, locking him inside. The beast let out a roar, a hell of an angry roar that sent shivers down my back.
"Holy shit" Jake exclaimed, now at my side.
"Yea," I said back "Holy shit"
The F.B.I was finishing loading the beast into a truck when Jones approached me. "What did you think of the team?" he asked. My gaze shifted towards Sarah as she was talking to some agent about the beast.
"I liked everybody" I answered.
Jones, catching my gaze, said with a smirk. "Some more than others?" My grin was my only reply. "Would you be interested in doing hunts like this one again? Everyone else already agreed," he asked in a more serious tone.
I thought for a moment and then said, "Yeah, I'll hunt with you folks anytime."
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2019.08.23 19:12 SuperDan000 The Kaga Saga 2 (Chapter 8): United Fleet

Hello. Long time no see. This is my 140th story post btw. Last chapter I held a vote of where Kaga should go which explains why this chapter took a long time to make. Nevertheless it is done and I plan on retiring after this series is over. So I checked the votes and people told me to do the German path so I did. Anyways, enjoy.
“I’m going to go for the German campaign.” Kaga decided. “After all, it’s the closest and on the way towards home. I could investigate what is causing the Parallel ships to appear near there.”
“Alrighty then. Just remember that you have to do the other missions as well since we are short on ships at the moment. You’ll be rewarded for your actions.” Midway reminded.
“Jeez, I feel like I’m taking quests from a quest giver.”
“Well I appreciate you helping us first Kaga. I look forward to what your fleet is capable of.” Bismarck thanked.
“No problem, but do you mind if we make a quick stop in England? I need someone there who will be useful for my grand tour.” Kaga requested.
“I don’t really mind but do make it quick. We have a port to save.”
On the next day, all the ships in Kaga’s force prepared to set sail. Iowa and Alaska tagged along as well. As noted before, they were going to the British Isles.
“Eugen, let’s get going?” Bismarck urged the cruiser to escort her.
“Copy that King.” Prinz Eugen replied.
“Don’t call me that.” Then Bismarck noticed Friedrich der Grosse. “Excuse me, but you look strangely familiar. I mean, you do look similar to me yet bigger.”
“Well, I’m none other than the H-39 battleship that was never built. You can call me Friedrich der Grosse.” The larger battleship answered.
“Ah. A lost paper ship. You were supposed to be my successor. I always wanted to know what you would look like. I must say, you are impressive.”
“Hey wait. Successor? You aren’t my mother. I have my own purpose in life right now.”
“I didn’t say I was. Listen here, you are clearly more powerful than me and I think it’s wise that you become our next leader after this war is over. I for one am too old for this, and I want you to entrust the future generations. Sound like a deal?”
“I’ll think about it. Just leave the offer on the table and I’ll get back to you when I decide.”
“That’s all I need to hear.”
“Kaga, why do we need to go to the UK?” Asked Akagi.
“There is someone I worked with before living there currently. I’ll introduce you to her when we get there.”
The fleet arrived on the southern coast of England. Kaga looked around to find who she was looking for. They came across a museum ship dock, and sitting in her berth was none other than the recent museum addition ship, Ark Royal.
“Everyone, this is the carrier I need. Say hello to the Royal Ark, one of the treasures found during my grand adventure.”
All the ships were in awe, except for Bismarck.
“It’s you! The one who left me stranded in the ocean for 3 days.”
“It’s not my fault your rudder is made of paper.” Ark Royal defended herself.
“You two know each other?” Kaga asked.
“Yeah… We used to be part of Captain Kidd’s crew. A pair of adventurers like us got greedy one day and that led to an argument. Things got messy and we fought each other. But I think she thought unfair because of her stupid magical planes!” Bismarck explained.
“I played fair Bismarck. Get over it!” Ark Royal fought back.
“You ended my career as an adventurer!”
“I think both of you need to calm down.” Akagi tried to hush them.
“Alright fine.” Both of them complied.
“Don’t trust her Friedrich. She’ll turn on you and use her magic Swordfishes to get what she wants.” Bismarck whispered over to her larger counterpart.
“It’s alright. We’re friends. She helped me on my adventures. You have nothing to worry about.” Kaga ensured.
Kaga discussed with Ark Royal, that she needed her assistance which Ark Royal happily obliged. There were no issues with the museum as long as she made it back in one piece. After some paperwork was done, everyone was ready to get going. However, 2 ships appeared and stopped them for a bit.
“Hey New Jersey. It’s been a while. And the Demon Lord is here with you too?” It was Belfast and Black, the mercenaries who worked with Kaga during the Robot Revolution crisis.
“Hey you two. What brings you here. Also I thought you retired after making enough money, Belfast.” New Jersey discussed with them.
“We heard Kaga was coming here, and wanted to help out. Maybe get paid for our services. We want to fight the parallel alongside you.” Black stated.
“Well payment is up to the responsibility of the UN, but you are free to join me.” Kaga answered them.
“Looks like we’re bringing the mercenary dream team together again.’ Kitakami said.
“Whoa whoa whoa! The Demon Lord can actually talk?” Black was surprised.
“It’s been 4 years since I heard her voice.” Belfast said.
“You knew each other for that long?” Kaga was curious.
“Well we fought together in the Chinese Civil War. At that time, I was still working with the Royal Navy. After seeing what Kitakami could do, I left the navy to be a PMC. I believed this would be the way to learn skills never tried before due to our doctrine.” The light cruiser explained. “I eventually met up with her later on in life when she was still silent. All the way to when I met you.”
“Well thanks for the explanation. There is no time, we need to help clean up a mess for the Germans again.”
“You Germans seriously get in too much trouble. We always seem to clean up after you.” Belfast expressed disappointment. “Anyways, I remembered something from a long time ago. The Queen requests you, Kitakami, to go visit her if you ever come to Britain.”
“Why does she want me?” Kitakami questioned the thought.
“Because it’s a rather important duty for me.” Another voice said behind her.
It was the Queen of the British Empire. Her Royal Majesty, battleship HMS Queen Elizabeth. Surrounding her were her two escorting destroyers and three submarines. Everyone was confused about what was going on. Hood also appeared out of nowhere and issued a decree ordering Kitakami to move up before the Queen.
“Your majesty? What is this all this about?” Kitakami asked.
“So you’re Kitakami the Demon Lord. I heard stories about you. Back then, during the Chinese Civil War and Pan Asian Insurgency, you were there to protect Hong Kong. Most importantly, you saved my sister, Princess Warspite, the governor of Hong Kong on several occasions. As a reward, I am pleased to hereby knight you. This has been unprecedented as your are the first non British resident, and a mercenary too, to be knighted by me.”
“You’re making me a knight?”
“That is true. Are you willing to accept my offer of gratitude?”
“I guess so. I am honoured to be awarded a prestigious title.”
“Then I knight thee, Dame Kitakami.” The battleship took out a sword and did a knighting process for the torpedo cruiser. “Now go on henceforth. Serve under the guidance of Kaga to stop the attacks in Germany. Once you are done, make sure you free the Suez Canal which is currently occupied by the Parallel and hopefully you can save my sister again who is trapped in Hong Kong. Another governor of mine is stuck in Singapore as well. Please help her too. It’s a big favour but I want my people to be alive.”
Cleveland the reporter took several pictures of the small event and wrote down some notes for her latest news piece. Something like this will be front page news material. Of course, she has to write a bit about Kaga too. Perhaps she is Kitakami’s biggest fan.
“I promise as it’s my new knightly duty. Don’t worry, I’ll save your sister again. You can count on me. Kaga here knows what to do right?” Kitakami declared.
“That is true. Let’s get going. We have to cut the ceremony short. We still have a world to save.” Kaga hurrid the process.
“Right. Let’s get going.” Kitakami agreed.
The Kaga fleet headed straight for German lands and before they knew it, smoke can be seen rising near Hamburg. Destroyers painted in black fired salvos on the city and trapped in the centre of the action was the German carrier, Graf Zeppelin, which is still under construction. German patrol boats, torpedo boats, Scharnhorst and Admiral Graf Spee were the only ones with the carrier to defend the town from destruction. Bismarck and Kaga discussed their battle plans and briefed everyone their roles and positions. Their first priority was to clean out the initial threats moving in on the carrier before spreading out to hold off the remaining ships. Once that is completed, aircraft from all carriers are to scout out the source of where the enemy ships are coming from.
“Initiate Operation Hydrian. Push the Parallel out of our shores!” Bismarck commanded.
Ark Royal, Kaga, Akagi and Hakuryu all launched their bombers although Ark Royal’s planes can’t kill anything. But since her planes are magic, they can grant wishes that can help the fleet. For example, Ark Royal made a wish for all the frontline, black painted destroyers to go half their normal speed. Her Swordfish did a strange maneuver and the wish was magically granted. The destroyers were slowed down and became easier targets. The dive and torpedo bombers of the Japanese carriers then moved in to sink all the destroyers threatening Graf Zeppelin.
“Tally ho! Did someone order the cavalry?” Belfast radioed the defenders.
“Woohoo! Thank God, we’re saved!” Scharnhorst answered her call.
“Good. Continue doing your part and push the enemy back. Their destroyers so they’re easy targets, but don’t underestimate them.” Bismarck ordered.
The defenders were pleased and morale was boosted to continue fighting. Kaga ordered her destroyers under her control to move up against a pair of black painted Farraguts. Udaloi moved in quickly and sunk one with rapid gun fire. Haida cleaned up with sinking the other one which Udaloi heavily damaged.
Kaga radioed Graf Zeppelin, “Can you hear me? This is Kaga of the Second United Nations Fleet. Pleasure to meet you but now is not the time for introductions. Do you have any aircraft available on you?”
“I only have 8 Stukas on me. The the only aircraft I have and have been untested still.” Graf Zeppelin replied.
“That is alright. It’s better than nothing. Are any of them armed?”
“They are. Shall I launch them?”
“Do it. More aircraft in the air will help us control the tide of battle.” Kaga explained. So Graf Zeppelin launched whatever planes she had to help. Her secondary guns were quite effective though.
“Warning! I’ve detected 3 new ships coming from the north. Unknown affiliation. A destroyer, cruiser and battleship.” Alaska detected with her radar.
“It’s the B Team. Looks like they recovered quickly like last time. Be careful, Enterprise might be near as well.” Kaga warned.
“Yamato, do you have that kind of radar Alaska has?” Yoshino asked her mentor.
“I wish. But don’t worry, we have the power of mathematics! You don’t need radar if you can calculate angles.” Yamato said. “Yubari, give a range on the Black Massachusetts!”
“12 km.” Yubari gave the range.
“Aww, Yamato is looking cute teaching her large cruiser.” Iowa said.
“I’m not jealous!” Yamato denied.
“Calm down there bud.” Missouri tried to cool the tension.
Kaga ordered Kitakami and her sisters to clean up the remaining destroyers while she deals with the B Team. Hatsuharu, Yahagi and Budyonny were also ordered to follow them. Cleveland followed behind to take pictures. Everyone else focused their attention on the B Team. Kaga ordered her submarine, I-168, to attack when the opportunity arises.
Yoohoo! You guys missed us? You must be real tired of us not giving up!” Asashio B taunted.
“Enough of your bullshit” Don’t make me try to sink you again!” Kaga readied her famed fighter squadron.
“Quick. Don’t let her launch her launch the cherry blossom!” Atago B urged.
“Alright Sovetsky Soyuz. It’s time to show me what you’ve got. Sink Massachusetts B!” New Jersey ordered.
“Da.” The Russian battleship said.
“Oh are you approaching me?” Massachusetts B noticed Sovetsky Soyuz coming close to her.
“I can’t beat the shit out of you if I don’t get any closer.”
“Then come as close as you like.” Massachusetts said before unleashing her secondaries. The secondaries however had little effect on the Russian. Sovetsky Soyuz charged right in and managed to hit a citadel on Massachusetts B as they passed each other. The black battleship was then pelted by almost every ship in Kaga’s fleet. Massachusetts screamed while she was set ablaze. Kaga analyzed the ship’s status on her Silicon Chip of Knowledge. The only way to sink her is a good torpedo hit. Destroyer Black stepped up to launch her torpedoes but I-168 was in a good position too. Massachusetts B managed to evade the destroyer’s wall but sailed straight into I-168’s trap.
“Gah!” Massachusetts yelled after the fatal blow.
“Woof!” I-168 barked.
“Good job I-168. You get a treat!” Kaga praised.
“You raised your sub well.” Black told Kaga. Yamato, Sovetsky Soyuz, Bismarck and Iowa closed in on Massachusetts B and sunk her for good. The black battleship never said a word as she went down.
“Shit Massachusetts is down!” Atago B panicked. “What do we do now?”
“The false Kaga has her ships engaging us now but no worry, it’s high tide now. We delayed them just enough.” Asashio B did not worry a bit.
Suddenly, a Fletcher class destroyer, painted in black, moved out of her smoke and quickly launched a torpedo at Bismarck. The battleship reacted by maneuvering but got hit in the rudder again.
“Bismarck, are you okay?” Prinz Eugen was concerned.
“I’m fine. I took the hit in a non critical area although my steering is busted. I’ll show you when we get back to port.”
“Just who is that destroyer?” Takao asked.
“It’s a Fletcher but that hull number… I’ve never seen anyone with that before.” New Jersey analyzed.
“Do we even have a destroyer with a 999?” Missouri asked.
“None that I can think of.” Iowa recalled.
All the other ships retreated back with only the Black Fletcher to remain in sight. Asashio and Atago B were watching from a distance. Black decided to take her on as they were the same ship. They dodged each others attacks until suddenly, the black destroyer slowed down to introduce herself.
“So, you must be my worthy opponent. Allow me to introduce myself. I am the destroyer USS White (DD-999).” The black painted destroyer revealed.
“Funny, I’m the destroyer USS Black (DD-666)” The white painted destroyer answered.
“We are truly equals then, yet complete opposites. Why don’t we fight amongst each other one on one? No interference.”
“Fine.”
“Wait Black don’t do this.” Belfast warned.
“There’s nothing we can do. All we can do is watch. Everyone, form a perimeter!” Kaga ordered.
A small battle between the two destroyers began as they charged against one another making close call passes. It was 666 against the 999. Kitakami was quite amazed by what Black could do as it strongly reminded her of her past battles. Black and White in white and black engaged at such close quarters as if they blurred together as a neutral grey. The flow and fluidity of the battle moved so quickly as the Yin and Yang fought to their full potential that nobody was sure who would win in the end. White complimented Black’s attacks but continued to try again and hit her, while Black returned the favour with a similar reply. Torpedoes were launched all over the place as the two opposites danced around them.
“This duel is like no other I have seen.” Yamato quoted.
“Maybe to you. But I have done similar things.” Kitakami said.
“It’s like the sea is split in half.” Graf Spee noted.
“C’mon Black. Take her down!” Belfast encouraged.
“Well Black, it looks like both got what it takes, but it’s gonna be all over with this next trick.” White said.
“”And if I win?” Black asked.
“Impossible. You can’t beat me so easily.” White said before releasing a smoke screen. Despite being able to hide in smoke, she could still see Black with her radar.
“I think I see your fatal flaw.” Black turned on her own radar and spotted White immediately. She hit the black painted destroyer several times which caught White off guard. “Rookie mistake White.”
“What!? You have radar too!?”
“We’re one and the same yet different. I’m surprised you tried to pull such a stunt.”
“Well then I applaud you. But I’m merely just a distraction. You still don’t know where we are coming from.” White coughed.
Kaga remembered that they still need to find the source of where the Parallel is coming from so she launched her Sakura Squadron out to scout. Black finished her job and sank White immediately. Atago and Asashio B managed to retreat and disappeared in the mist.
“Hamburg is saved for now, but we still need to find the source.” Bismarck said. “You can leave me here. I need to get repaired here.”
“This is Sakura 0, we found a portal. Several Parallel ships are coming out of it!”
“Send in the coordinates, we need to move now.” Kaga ordered.
“What does this portal look like?” Kitakami wondered.
“I’d like to know too.” Black was curious.
“I don’t know but it looks… artificial?” Sakura ∞ was unsure.
The fleet arrived on the scene to see the remaining black destroyers gain a few new reinforcements from the reported portal. The survivors of the B Team are nowhere to be found. Maybe they retreated back into the portal and left their pawns to defend. Kaga determined that if she went through it, she would walk into a trap. Yet, they can’t leave it open or else more ships will start pouring out.
“Hey, that portal looks familiar.” Yamato pointed out.
“Do give your insight doc.” Kaga wanted to be informed.
“This portal was developed by me and the others of the Yamato Space Program. One of our projects involved wormhole technology but we never succeeded in that yet. The Parallel may be holding technology we do not truly understand. I must know their secrets.”
“I gotta admit. Them using our tech and making it work has surprised me.” Yubari said.
“Well we need to blow it up right now correct?” Yoshino wondered.
“We have to. There is no other way. All carriers, send out your dive bombers.” Kaga ordered.
“I have rockets for my fighter wing. Perhaps they can be of use.” Hakuryu reminded.
“Use them. We need to destroy it immediately while we fight through the destroyer picket line.” Akagi told Hakuryu.
Kaga and her fleet fought through the destroyers but there were too many in front of them. The portal was taking heavy hits but it was built tough like Yamato herself and could sustain lots of damage.
“We’re being overwhelmed!” Kitakami warned.
“We can’t just retreat here.” Friedrich der Grosse grew defiant.
“Bark bark!” I-168 barked.
“I underestimated our abilities. We can’t take them all like this but we need to get close enough to the portal to destroy it.” What will Kaga do?
Black painted destroyers were sunk left and right but there was no end in sight. More destroyers came out of the portal too. It was like an unending wave. Is this the end?
TO BE CONTINUED...
I have a feeling I have too many characters going on at once. That makes it very hard to cover all their arcs and can lead to sloppy writing. Either way, I hope you'll stick around for chapter 9 into my descent into madness. Also submarines are cool. Heh.
Previous chapter: Coalition
Next chapter: The Wolfpack
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2019.07.25 02:22 theyummycookie Fantasy Amazing Race

Here's a fantasy amazing race I created in my free time. This isn't meant to be super realistic, because obviously there are limitations in going to places like Tuvalu and Egypt. Feel free to give me feedback down below. Thanks!
Edit: added fast forwards on legs 3 and 9

RACE #1
Leg 1 (USA - Bolivia)
Leg 2 (Bolivia - Peru)
Leg 3 (Peru - Tuvalu)
Leg 4 (Tuvalu - Australia)
Leg 5 (Australia - Nepal)
Leg 6 (Nepal - Madagascar)
Leg 7 (Madagascar - Egypt)
Leg 8 (Egypt)
Leg 9 (Egypt - Italy)
Leg 10 (Italy)
Leg 11 (Italy - Ireland - United Kingdom)
Leg 12 (United Kingdom - USA)
LEG 1
USA - Bolivia
Start in Monument Circle, Indianapolis, Indiana
Run to the base of the Soldiers and Sailors Monument and search for your clue scattered around
Clue #1
Drive one of the provided cars to Indianapolis Motor Speedway and park in the marked lot. Your next clue will be waiting.
Clue #2
Travel on foot to the base of the large tower in the center of the speedway. There, choose a driver and a card numbered 1-11, based on the order you arrived in. Once all teams have arrived, everyone will take a lap around the track with their driver in an Indy 500 car, according to the order. When you are finished, your driver will hand you your next clue.
Clue #3
Fly to La Paz, Bolivia! Hurry to Indianapolis Airport Main Entrance for one of three flights arriving at different times.
Flight 1 (4 teams): Indianapolis - Chicago - La Paz, arrives 8:00 AM
Flight 2 (2 teams): Indianapolis - Miami - Mexico City - La Paz, arrives 9:00 AM
Flight 3 (5 teams): Indianapolis - New York - La Paz, arrives 9:30 AM
When disembarking in Bolivia, immediately travel to the Estacion Central, and search the nearby Witches Market for your next clue.
Clue #4
Roadblock: Who wants to fly around the city?
Go to the nearby cable car station, where you can pick up a list of destinations from the operator. Go to all locations and pick up a marked souvenir pin representing the place. You can only use the cable cars and travel on foot to complete this challenge. At one location, you must complete a task. Once you have collected all souvenirs, return to the operator and he will give you your next clue. Your partner will travel with you on this roadblock, but cannot help you with navigation or the tasks. Hold onto the souvenirs, you’ll need them later in the race.
Destinations List:
Polifunctional de la Ceja
Iglesia de San Francisco
Plaza Murillo
Hotel Presidente (face forward rappel down the side of the building)
Clue #5
Take a bus to Copacabana, Bolivia, and hike to the mirador at Cerro Calvario to find your next clue.
Clue #6
Choose one of the guides to take you down to the pier where traditional Totora boats are. They will then proceed to ferry you across to Isla del Sol, where you will find your clue when you arrive.
Clue #7
Take count of all the steps on Escalera del Inca. When you make it to the top, tell the street musician your answer. If correct, he will give you your next clue. If incorrect, you must go all the way down to the bottom and try again.
Answer: 205 steps
Clue #8
Roadblock: Who’s ready to have their day ruined? (The teammate who did the first roadblock cannot participate in this one.)
Travel on foot through the marked trail to Pilko Kaina, famous ruins in Isla del Sol. Make sure to keep an eye open for thirteen stations that you will take one letter tile from each. Upon arrival at Pilko Kaina, a judge will make sure you have all thirteen tiles. If you do not, you’ll be sent back to search for the missing stations. If you have all the tiles, you must arrange them to spell out your first pit stop. Ask the judge to check, and she will give you your next clue, only to be opened once you have gotten back to your partner.
Clue #9
If you spelled it out correctly, you will have gotten this location: Fuente del Inca. Once you arrive, you will be given a small quiz on what the Incans believed the fountain represented. The last team to figure out the answer may be eliminated.
Answer: Don’t lie, don’t steal, and don’t be lazy
Pit Stop, Leg 1
first: trip to Argentina
last: eliminated
LEG 2
Bolivia - Peru
Clue #1
Travel to the Copacabana Bus Terminal and book one of the following buses to Cusco, Peru:
Bus 1 (4 teams): Copacabana - Cusco, arrives 4:00 PM
Bus 2 (1 team): Copacabana - Cusco, arrives 4:30 PM
Bus 3 (5 teams): Copacabana - Arequipa - Cusco, arrives 7:15 PM
Upon arrival, go to Plaza de Armas, and search for a pedestal with tags.
Tags 1-3: departure at 10:00 AM
Tags 4-6: departure at 10:10 AM
Tags 7-8: departure at 10:20 AM
Tags 9-10: departure at 10:30 AM
In the morning, travel to Cusco Cathedral and take a clue from the priest at the front. You must wait until your allotted time to enter the cathedral.
Clue #2
Go to the Sacsayhuaman Main Entrance by taxi for your next clue.
Clue #3
Detour: Towers or Doors
Towers: In the remnants of Sacsayhuaman, there are three towers, but only the foundations remain. You will go to the foundation of each tower, and measure the circumference of each foundation using provided tape measures. When you have finalized your answers, go to the guide at the base of Paucamarca, where she will give you your next clue.
Doors: Take a package of three tablets that have the names of three of the famous doors at Sacsayhuaman. Go to each of the three doors and put the name of each door in a slot next to the door. Once you have all the names matched up, the guide will give you your next clue. There are only six slots at each door, so a maximum of six teams can complete this side of the detour.
Clue #4
Go to the Suchuna on foot, and slide down. At the bottom, a guide will give you your next clue.
Clue #5
Travel to Awana Kancha by taxi. Once you have arrived, feed a llama. The farm owner will give you your next clue.
Clue #6
Go to Terminal Terrestre and book an overnight bus to Machu Picchu. If you arrive at 5:30 AM or earlier, you will be eligible to take the morning shift, starting at 6:00 AM. Any later, and you will have to take the afternoon shift, starting at noon. Once inside Machu Picchu, go to Plaza Manco Capac for your next clue.
Clue #7
Roadblock: Who’s ready to dial it up?
First, travel to Intihuatana, an ancient sundial that the people used to predict solstices. Nearby will be a stack of small sundials. Grab a sundial and make your way to The Watchman’s Tower where three artificial suns have been set up inside. Using your sundials, find the times that each light portrays. Once you have it figured out, go back to Intihuatana to have a judge check your answers.
Clue #8
Make your way on foot to The Temple of the Sun, and the pit stop! The last team to arrive may be eliminated.
Pit Stop, Leg 2
first: trip to Grenada
last: eliminated
LEG 3
Peru - Tuvalu
Clue #1
Take a bus from Machu Picchu to Lima. Once you have arrived, search the Main Square of Lima for the clue box.
Clue #2
Fly to Funafuti, Tuvalu! Upon arrival, head to David’s Drill where you’ll find your next clue.
Fast Forward, Leg 3
Make your way to Asivai Motorbike Hire, where you must fix two unoperational motorbikes until they’re ready to ride. Once completed, follow your guide and bike “around” Tuvalu one time. Once you’ve finished your biking, you’ll receive a clue that leads you directly to the pit stop.
Clue #3
Detour: Kick it Up or Stamp it In
Kick it Up: Go to the Funafuti Airstrip and join in with the local’s soccer game. Because there are only two flights into Funafuti a week, the people here have transformed the runway into a public park of sorts. If you can lead your team to victory in a thirty-minute scrimmage of soccer, a player will give you your next clue.
Stamp it In: Go to Tuvalu Post, the home to Tuvalu’s many, many stamps. Upon arrival, you will be given a sheet with ten pictures of stamps. Under each picture, you must unscramble all of the letters to figure out the names of the stamps. After identifying all the stamps, the worker will give you all the actual stamps you identified in large rolls, along with five addresses. You are to deliver all of the stamps to the correct addresses. Once you return to Tuvalu Post, you will receive your next clue.
Clue #4
Go to the Tuvalu House and ask the Prime Minister for your next clue.
Clue #5
Head to the meneapa near the airport terminal and Hotel Filamona for your next clue.
Clue #6
Roadblock: Who can do a fatele?
This roadblock has one teammate participate in a traditional Tuvaluan dance, the fatele, or dancing song. Choose a teacher, and once you are ready, dance in front of the locals. If you meet their approval, you will be given the next clue.
Clue #7
Travel on foot to Tuvalu Port and take a marked boat out to Funafuti Conservation Area. You will be provided with a snorkel, mask, and camera. You have a standard time of one hour out in the area, but every sea turtle you can capture a picture of reduces your time by fifteen minutes. Once your time is up, your driver will give you your next clue.
Clue #8
Have your driver take you to the Tuvalu Marine Training Institute, with your pit stop at the entrance. The last team to arrive may be eliminated!
Pit Stop, Leg 3
first: 4k each
last: eliminated
LEG 4
Tuvalu - Australia
Clue #1
Fly to Sydney, Australia! Once in Sydney, travel by taxi to Sydney Tower, and proceed to climb to the top of it and participate in the Skywalk. Once completed, go down to the base of the tower and use one of the provided cars to traverse the leg until told otherwise.
Clue #2
Detour: Surf or Turf
Surf: Travel to Bondi Beach and search for the marked flags. Choose an instructor to teach you the surfing basics. Once both teammates have successfully ridden a wave without falling over, the instructor will give you your next clue.
Turf: Go to the SCG, and out on the middle of the field, choose a rugby instructor who will teach you how to play. Your goal is to pass the ball amongst yourselves and get past four professional rugby players and into the endzone. After completing your challenge, you’ll be given your next clue.
Clue #3
Travel to the Hayden Orpheum Picture Palace for your next clue.
Clue #4
Head into the theater once the current showing is finished. There will be a recording that says ten items that you must remember completely by memory. Once you think you have it down, head to Paddy’s Markets and order all of your items. Bring these ten items back to the man at the front desk of the theater and he will give you your next clue.
Clue #5
Make your way to Palm Beach and look for your next clue.
Clue #6
Roadblock: Who’s a TV star?
Join the team of wildly popular Australian drama, Home and Away, and successfully film a scene with them. Choose an instructor to teach you all of the lines and actions. When you’re ready, perform in front of the cast and production team. If they approve, you will get your next clue. If not, you have to go to the back of the line and try again.
Clue #7
Take a ferry to Cockatoo Island, and search the campground for your next clue. Abandon your vehicle at the ferry station.
Clue #8
Set up your tent! (Once you’ve checked into the pit stop, you’ll be staying the night here.) Collect all needed materials from the campgrounds office, then take a marked plot and build your tent. Once the camp ranger approves, she will give you your next clue.
Clue #9
Travel on foot to the Convict Precinct, where the pit stop is! The last team to arrive may be eliminated.
Pit Stop, Leg 4
first: trip to Fiji
last: non-elimination leg
LEG 5
Australia - Nepal
Clue #1
Fly to Kathmandu, Nepal, on one of the two pre-scheduled flights.
Flight 1 (4 teams): Sydney - Kathmandu, arrives 7:35 AM
Flight 2 (4 teams): Sydney - Bangkok - Kathmandu, arrives 8:00 AM
Once you’ve touched down, go to Boundsanath by taxi and receive a traditional Buddhist welcome to get your next clue.
Clue #2
Travel by taxi to Cafe de Genre in the Thamel District for your next clue.
Clue #3
Roadblock: Who wants to sell the goods?
One teammate will choose a shopping stall nearby selling one of these goods: clothing, jewelry, paper lanterns, books, carvings, statues, keychains, or paintings. The first teams to arrive get the first choice at what they’re selling. Once you have earned 2000 Nepali Rupees, the vendor will give you your next clue.
Clue #4
Travel by taxi to Dubar Square for your next clue.
Speed Bump, Leg 5
Make your way on foot to Roots Eatery and eat a traditional Nepali meal. Once completed, go on with the race as normal.
Clue #5
Detour: Straw Baling or Wool Spinning
Straw Baling: Travel to The Little House in the Rice Fields in Khokana Village. Outside, have an instructor teach you how to construct a manual straw baler, and bale straw using it. Once you have successfully baled three bales of straw, your instructor will hand you your next clue.
Wool Spinning: Travel to The Little House in the Rice Fields in Khokana Village. Inside, have an instructor teach you how to spin wool into yarn. Once you’ve spun twenty meters, you will receive your next clue.
Clue #6
Make your way by to Shekala Mai Temple and the pit stop! The last team to arrive will be eliminated.
Pit Stop, Leg 5
first: trip to Maldives
last: eliminated
LEG 6
Nepal - Madagascar
Clue #1
Fly out of Nepal from the Tribhuvan International Airport and go to Antananarivo, Madagascar! Go to La Digue Market and search for the marked stall selling colorful bags and purses. The owner will give you your next clue. Caution! Double U-Turn ahead!
Clue #2
Travel by taxi to Croc Farm. Your clue will be at the main entrance.
Clue #3
Roadblock: Who’s hungry for some chomping?
You must select a staff member and they will guide you to the feeding place of their Nile Crocodiles. After entering the enclosure and successfully feeding the crocodiles, you will receive your next clue.
Clue #4
Travel by taxi to Lemur’s Park. Your clue will be at the main entrance, along with the Double U-Turn. However, you can only use the U-Turn after you have completed the detour.
Clue #5
Chase or Capture
Chase: Follow a series of five clues throughout Lemur’s Park. Each clue will lead you to a very specific location. Once you have gone through all five clues, you will combine all of them together to reveal the location of the clue that will lead you to your next destination.
Capture: Use one of the provided Nikon D850s to capture a picture of five of the nine lemur species living in the park. Then, ask the naturalist to take a test. He will lead you to a room where you have three minutes to identify the names of the lemurs you took a picture of. Only one team may take a test at a time. Once you ace it, the naturalist will give you your next clue.
Clue #6
Travel by taxi to the Musee de l’Art et de Archeologie, where you’ll find your next clue.
Clue #7
Construct a model lemur skeleton using the provided model. Once you’re done, ask the archeologist for your clue to the pit stop!
Clue #8
Travel by taxi to the remains of Rova Palace and the pit stop! The last team to arrive may be eliminated.
Pit Stop, Leg 6
first: cruise to Alaska
last: eliminated
LEG 7
Madagascar - Egypt
Clue #1
Fly to Cairo, Egypt! Once on the ground, make your way to Egypt Sandboarding.
Clue #2
Roadblock: Who’s feeling ‘board’?
The teammate who chooses this roadblock will select a guide and go with them out to a nearby sandboarding location. To get your clue, you must successfully get down three slopes without falling. Once you’ve mastered sandboarding, have the guide take you back to your partner where you’ll get your next clue.
Clue #3
Make your way on foot through the streets of Cairo to Giza Zoological Garden.
Clue #4
Enclosed are two Giza Plateau tickets. Have a taxi take you to Giza Necropolis, where you’ll find your next clue.
Clue #5
Ride or Run
Ride: Travel to Giza Camel Riding. Once there, take a designated camel and ride it to The Sphinx, where you’ll find the first half of your clue. Now, return to Giza Camel Riding and enter the stable. Fill the empty trough of water until you’ve reached the line. Then, proceed to one of the marked stalls and remove all of the used hay. Do this for two more stalls. Retrieve new hay and get it in the stall. Once completed, the stable manager will give you the last half of your clue.
Run: Go to each of the three main pyramids (Giza, Khafre, Menkaure) and enter inside. Follow the marked paths inside the pyramids and get a total of two bags of puzzle pieces from each pyramid. Once you’ve gotten all pieces, go to The Sphinx, where stations have been made for you to complete your puzzle. Once you’re done, an archeologist will give you your next clue.
Clue #6
Go across the street from the Egyptian Geology Museum to the pit stop. The last team to arrive may be eliminated.
Pit Stop, Leg 7
first: 6k each
last: continue racing
LEG 8
Egypt
Clue #1
Take a taxi to the Egyptian Museum and go to the Tutankhamun exhibit, where you’ll find your next clue.
Clue #2
Fly to Hurghada, Egypt! Upon touching down, head to the airport main parking lot, and search for your marked car. Then drive to Mini Egypt Park, and get on a marked paddle boat. Paddle out to a buoy and retrieve a clue.
Clue #3
Detour: Scuba or Sub
Scuba: Drive to Red Sea Zoom and choose a guide. Put on all gear and go out on the boat with your guide. Once out in the open waters of the Red Sea, dive down and around, and search for a clue suspended in the water. Once you have retrieved your clue, you can return to land and go to your next destination. Only four teams can go at once.
Sub: Embark on a journey with Sinbad Submarines. Drive to Red Sea Zoom and have a guide take you to Sinbad Submarines. Help guide a submarine through the Red Sea and bring it successfully back to the surface. If you manage to control the sub well enough, the captain will give you your next clue. Tours leave on a schedule, so if you get there at the right time, the detour’s length shrinks significantly.
Clue #4
Drive to the Hurghada Touristic Marina for your next clue.
Clue #5
Go parasailing! Choose a boat and get situated for a double ride. Once you’ve completed this amazing experience over the water, you’ll receive your next clue.
Clue #6
Drive to the El Masry Restaurant for your next clue.
Clue #7
Roadblock: Who’s hungry to make a splash?
Head out to the pool at the back of the restaurant and choose an inflatable. Once in the pool, a waiter will give you a traditional Egyptian dish called Feseekh. If you fall off your inflatable while in the pool, you must restart your dish. When you down the dish, a waiter will give you your next clue.
Clue #8
Go to your pit stop at Hurghada Grand Aquarium. The last team to arrive will be eliminated.
Pit Stop, Leg 8
first: trip to Virgin Islands
last: eliminated
LEG 9
Egypt - Italy
Clue #1
Fly out of Hurghada International Airport and to Siena, Italy, on one of two pre-scheduled flights!
Flight 1 (2 teams): Hurghada - Cairo - Rome - Siena, arrives 8:00 AM
Flight 2 (3 teams): Hurghada - Alexandria - Naples - Siena, arrives 8:45 AM
Upon arrival, find marked cars outside in the airport parking lot. Your next clue will be inside.
Fast Forward, Leg 9
Drive to Leccetina Park outside Massa Marittima. Once there, take a hot-air balloon around the Tuscan countryside. After the ride, you will be given a clue that takes you directly to the pit stop.
Clue #2
Drive to Torre del Mangia, and climb to the top of the tower for your next clue.
Clue #3
Roadblock: Who’s ready to chime in with their cardio strength?
One team member must scout out from the top of Torre del Mangia two flags in Piazzo del Campo seen best from here. You must then climb down and go to one of the flags and retrieve a small bell pin from a person standing near the marker. After retrieving your first bell, you must climb back all the way up the tower and give your bell to your partner. Then, repeat with the second marker. Once your partner can present two bells from two different stations, you can ring the bell tower one time and the priest will give you your next clue. Note: You must keep your bells for later use in the race.
Clue #4
Drive to the Cathedral of Sant’Antimo in Piombino for your next clue.
Clue #5
Detour: Boat Building or Sail Shifting
Boat Building: Drive to Calamoresca, and search for the marked part of the beach. Using provided parts such as water barrels, logs, sticks, large rubber bands, clips, and pieces of cloth, create a watercraft that will be able to get one hundred meters through a course out to the man on the jet ski. If anyone falls off the raft, you have to restart. Once you reach the man on the jet ski, he will give you your next clue. Bring your craft back to the beach and continue racing.
Sail Shifting: Drive to Port of Piombino, and search through the docks until you find a marked sailboat. An instructor will be waiting on your boat and will show you the basics of how to work the sail on a sailboat. Once you’re ready, the instructor will bring you out to open ocean. A buoy with a flag will be seen out in the distance, approximately five kilometers away, and without the help of any motor, you must make your way to the buoy. Once you have your clue, your instructor can bring you back to the port. Only four teams can do this detour at once.
Clue #6
Get to Portoferraio on the island of Elba, by ferry. Board with your car and once you’ve arrived, drive to the Gravel Beach for your next clue.
Clue #7
Travel on foot to Spiaggia di Capo Bianco, where the pit stop awaits. The last team to arrive may be eliminated.
Pit Stop, Leg 9
first: trip to French Polynesia
last: eliminated
LEG 10
Italy
Clue #1
Drive back to the mainland of Italy to Piombino. Go to Salivoli Beach for your next clue. Caution! Double U-Turn ahead!
Clue #2
Drive to the train station and take a train to Pisa, Italy! When you’ve arrived, travel on foot to the top of The Leaning Tower of Pisa, where you’ll find your next clue.
Clue #3
Travel on foot to Geleteria De Coltelli for your next clue.
Clue #4
Roadblock: Who can withstand the brain freeze?
One teammate must brave the brain freezes and get down two whole pints of straciatella gelato, one of the most renowned flavors in all of Italy. Once you’ve gotten down all two pints, you will receive your next clue.
Clue #5
Take a train to Lucca, Italy. Climb to the top of Guinigi Tower for your next clue.
Clue #6
Water or Wall
Water: Travel to where Aqueduct of Nottolini intersects Parco dell’Acquedotto. There, you will find different shaped stone bricks and arches, that you must piece together to replicate the Aqueduct of Nottolini. Once water can come through your aqueduct from start to finish, you’ll get your next clue.
Wall: Search along the Via delle Mura Urbane until you spot an enormous marked pile of foam bricks. Once you can make a wall ten high and twenty long, you’ll get your next clue.
Clue #7
Travel on foot or using public transport to the pit stop, Lucca Cathedral! A Double U-Turn will be right in front of the mat. The last team to arrive may be eliminated.
Pit Stop, Leg 10
first: trip to Dominican Republic
last: non-elimination
LEG 11
Switzerland - Ireland - United Kingdom
Clue #1
Fly out of Basel Mulhouse Freiburg Airport and go to Dublin, Ireland! Upon touching down, take a taxi to The Spire of Dublin, where your next clue awaits.
Clue #2
Take one of the nearby marked cars to Guinness Storehouse, where you’ll find your next clue.
Clue #3
Roadblock: Who is ready to ‘beer’tend?
Make your way to Arthur’s Bar inside Guinness Storehouse and go to a marked table of eight. They will each order a specific beer. Go behind the bar and use the taps to get your customer’s drinks. Using a tray, return with all the beers at the same time. If you don’t spill or break the drinks, and if you get the orders correct, you’ll receive your next clue.
Speed Bump, Leg 11
Drive to Trinity College Library. When you arrive, ask the head librarian for a book. She will give you the name, author, and genre on a piece of paper. Bring the actual book back to her to receive your next clue.
Clue #4
Drive yourself to the southside of the City Center and find a marked door with a paint swatch on it. Then, drive to MCRB paints and retrieve that color. Finally, drive back to your door and paint it the same color as the swatch. When the homeowner is satisfied with their door, you’ll get your next clue.
Clue #5
Drive to Belfast, Northern Ireland, in the United Kingdom! Once there, go to Albert Memorial Clock.
Clue #6
Detour: Jump In or Ride Out
Jump In: Drive to Jungle NI and have a guide drive from there to the coasteering site on the coast of the Atlantic. Once you’ve finished the activity, the guide will give you your next clue.
Ride Out: Drive to Jungle NI and have a guide drive you to the llama trekking area. With your llama, trek a total of two miles, and your guide will hand over your next clue.
Clue #7
Drive along A2 road to The Giant’s Causeway, and the pit stop. The last team to arrive will be eliminated.
Pit Stop, Leg 12
first: trip to Galapagos Islands
last: eliminated
LEG 13
United Kingdom - USA
Clue #1
Drive back to Dublin and fly to Philadelphia, USA! When you arrive, take a taxi to the Rocky Steps. Then, get in a marked car parked across the street, where you’ll find your next clue.
Clue #2
Drive yourself to Flying W Airport and Resort where you’ll find your next clue.
Clue #3
Roadblock: Who’s ready to pull some strings?
Using the provided example and demonstration, set up a paramotor so it’s ready to be used in flight. Once it’s been approved by the pilot, you will be ready to fly. Once in the sky, search the ground for two words revealing the location of your next destination. Tell the pilot, and you’ll fly back down to the ground to get your next clue.
Clue #4
Drive back to Philadelphia and The Liberty Bell, where you’ll find your next clue.
Clue #5
Roadblock: Who’s ready to pick up the pieces? The teammate who did the first roadblock cannot do this one.
Go to the five buildings surrounding Independence National Historic Park and pick up one or two pins at each location that you will need for your final challenge. Once you have all pins, you can receive your next clue from the woman waiting at the Liberty Bell. Keep these pins for later in the race.
Destinations List:
Independence Hall (crocodile pin and clock pin)
Congress Hall (mummy pin and shopping stall pin)
Franklin Court (sun pin and book pin)
Bishop White House (jail cell pin)
New Hall Military Museum (sea turtle pin)
Clue #6
Drive to The Philadelphia Print Shop for your next clue.
Clue #7
Search the store’s many maps for eleven maps that highlight all of the countries you visited along the race. Once you think you have all of the maps, ask the woman at the front desk to check your answers. If you have it correct, you’ll receive your next clue.
Clue #8
Drive to Penns Landing Heliport and take a helicopter over Philadelphia to Valley Forge National Historic Park. Near the landing area will be a wall where you must use the pins, souvenirs, and bells you collected along the way to put up your maps in the order you went to them. Each pin must correspond with the location on the map. When you’ve pinned everything up correctly, you’ll receive your final clue.
Clue #9
Run to the final pit stop, at the Visitor’s Center, where all the eliminated teams are waiting. Go, go, go!
Final Pit Stop, Leg 13
11 countries
6 continents
Over 30,000 miles
first: 1mil
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2019.06.29 20:37 MossRock42 Mountain Men Season 8 Episode Guide

Here's a listing of the episodes from season 8.
1. New Blood
As winter closes in, Morgan and Margaret fly North to track down the great caribou migration and secure meat; Marty preps his trapline for the arrival of his daughter, Noah.
2. Polar Vortex
Eustace and Raleigh battle a polar vortex to get their lumber business back online; Mike braves a bear-infested landscape in search of fresh meat.
3. Darkness Falls
As night descends across the mountains, Mike treks through bear country with fresh meat on his back.
4. Family First
Jake will do anything to get his injured dog, Lefty, to the vet. Tom and his brother, Jack, are left high and dry when the well on his ranch stops pumping. Morgan takes one last shot at bagging a mountain sheep; Mike has to go back on the hunt after bears pillage his provisions. And Marty makes a shocking revelation.
5. Final Farewell
Jake sets off alone on the hunt for elk meat; Jason rolls the dice on an experimental smelter; Morgan and Margaret combat a critical water problem; Mike targets Kodiak Island's most dangerous quarry; and Marty bids a final farewell.
6. The Long Haul
Eustace and Raleigh set out in search of a deer to replenish their food stores; Jason faces the moment of truth in his attempt to create his own steel; Jake hauls 400 pounds of fresh elk meat out of the mountains; Kidd and Harry pack supplies into Idaho's remote backcountry; and Morgan and Margaret hope that a new trapline will save the day.
7. Desperate Measures
Kidd and Harry battle time and rough terrain on a backcountry supply run; Jake and his dogs track down a repeat offender; Tom gets back to business in the Yaak; Morgan checks his remote trapline for high-dollar fur; plus Eustace and Raleigh decide to fight back against trespassers.
8. Breaking Point
Jake has a problem lion on his hands and soon discovers it's not alone; Tom and his brother, Jack, break down on the road to the Yaak Valley; Morgan crosses the Great Alaska Range on an emergency supply run; Jason scavenges steel to jumpstart his bladesmith business; and Eustace and Raleigh's outpost cabin build is dealt a hard blow.
9. No Guts, No Glory
Kidd and Harry set their sights on bagging a buffalo; Jason and his son forge a brand new knife together for the first time; Jake goes after a mountain lion caught too close to civilization; and Morgan fights the deadly skies of Alaska in a race to resupply his homestead..
10. All or Nothing
Tom and Sean face off against a coyote threat; Eustace and Raleigh enlist some much-needed help building their lookout cabin; Jason takes one final crack at creating Ozark steel; Morgan and Margaret push deep into the backcountry in search of a stream where the fish are jumping; and Kidd and Harry run rapids to secure grazing land for the summer.
11. Tooth and Claw
Tom turns coyotes into cash; Eustace and Raleigh take to the forge to raise money for roofing materials; Mike scouts bears for the spring hunting season; Morgan and Margaret go fishing; and Kidd and Harry’s search for pastureland quickly turns into a pulse-pounding bear chase.
12. The Bus Stop Bandit
Jake hunts a lion caught stalking a school bus stop; Tom sets out to end his trapping season on a high note; Eustace and Raleigh struggle to put a roof on their outpost cabin; Morgan and Margaret prepare their horses for a critical supply run; and Jason takes on his first ever Ozark steel knife build.
13. Seize The Day (Season Finale)
Tom builds an authentic Native American bull boat; Jake goes back on the hunt for the bus stop bandit; Morgan struggles to haul a ton of greenhouse supplies; Eustace and Raleigh tackle a rush order for lumber; also Jason and his son, Kai, journey back underground in search of more iron ore.
submitted by MossRock42 to MountainMenTV [link] [comments]


2019.06.17 05:39 subreddit_stats Subreddit Stats: news top posts from 2019-05-17 to 2019-06-15 21:55 PDT

Period: 29.41 days
Submissions Comments
Total 998 163234
Rate (per day) 33.94 5333.89
Unique Redditors 550 54576
Combined Score 3669287 6216317

Top Submitters' Top Submissions

  1. 148280 points, 46 submissions: Jo_Jo_In_Tampa
    1. Boy, 16, fatally shot while trying to sell Xbox: 'They killed my son over nothing,' mom cries (64814 points, 9343 comments)
    2. Mom uses GPS to locate daughter, 17, trapped under car 25 feet down mountainside (23563 points, 1144 comments)
    3. San Francisco police union calls on chief to resign after raid on reporter's home (19031 points, 748 comments)
    4. Nike to change pregnancy policy for athletes in contracts after backlash over freezing pay (6521 points, 845 comments)
    5. Alabama woman says judge ordered her to allow her alleged rapist to visit their sons: report (5708 points, 909 comments)
    6. Homelessness jumps 12% across Los Angeles County (4892 points, 1527 comments)
    7. 'Heroes' lead police to Texas girl who was abducted while walking with her mother, police say (3061 points, 207 comments)
    8. Feds: 81-year-old bank robbery suspect wanted to return to prison because of small Social Security payments (2685 points, 348 comments)
    9. 41 shot, 7 fatally, in Chicago Memorial Day weekend gun violence (2321 points, 1316 comments)
    10. Woman jumps from window to escape brutal 6-hour rape in Queens, suspect on the loose (2070 points, 266 comments)
  2. 132061 points, 12 submissions: Creasy007
    1. Woman Who Called Michelle Obama An 'Ape' Sentenced To Jail For Defrauding FEMA of $18K (67771 points, 1327 comments)
    2. Ford Will Lay Off 7,000 White-Collar Workers (36202 points, 5194 comments)
    3. Colorado Governor Signs Gay Conversion Therapy Ban (21908 points, 766 comments)
    4. Leaked Chicago Police Video Shows Fatal Shooting of Mother Holding Her Baby (3473 points, 819 comments)
    5. Ohio Doctor Charged With 25 Counts of Murder, Accused of Prescribing Excessive Doses of Painkillers (878 points, 121 comments)
    6. 'Rocketman': Russian Distributor Cuts Film for Homosexual Propaganda Law (491 points, 55 comments)
    7. Quest Diagnostics Breach May Have Exposed Personal Data For Nearly 12 Million Patients (444 points, 71 comments)
    8. Florida Charter Boat Captain Accused of Drinking, Doing Drugs, Firing Gun, Threatening Passengers (264 points, 65 comments)
    9. Mother of 2 Dies After Falling From Lake Tahoe Waterfall (241 points, 126 comments)
    10. Ohio Middle School Where Radioactive Contamination Was Detected to Remain Closed Through 2020 (140 points, 11 comments)
  3. 92506 points, 6 submissions: Horror_Mango
    1. 9 People Showed Up for a KKK Rally in Dayton, Ohio. They Were Drowned Out by 600 Protestors (62854 points, 4799 comments)
    2. Police: Former councilman, 90, arrested after driving through crowd at Dover pride parade (20605 points, 2158 comments)
    3. Dad bought erotic massage with $700 daughter made from Girl Scout cookies, cops say (4784 points, 777 comments)
    4. Opioid Maker Agrees to Pay Oklahoma $85 Million Over Claims Company Helped Create Addiction Crisis (3686 points, 342 comments)
    5. Tar oozes on to sidewalk, street near La Brea Tar Pits (343 points, 99 comments)
    6. Police rescue woman chained in basement of Niagara Falls home (234 points, 22 comments)
  4. 92268 points, 3 submissions: brahbocop
    1. Police chief gives $575 ticket for tossing cigarette butt out window (48710 points, 5451 comments)
    2. Tennessee sheriff’s deputy, pastor calls for LGBTQ executions in sermon (42720 points, 5929 comments)
    3. WarnerMedia Joins Disney And Netflix In Considering Georgia Retreat Over Abortion Law (838 points, 294 comments)
  5. 87411 points, 2 submissions: Fanrific
    1. Sugar Daddy website founder to pay for abortions of women who need to travel out of restrictive states (44886 points, 2922 comments)
    2. US immigration detention centres caught serving spoiled food as investigation reveals nooses in cells (42525 points, 4299 comments)
  6. 84326 points, 14 submissions: JLBesq1981
    1. Colorado passes $1 billion in marijuana state revenue (51105 points, 2777 comments)
    2. 46 ice cream trucks are being seized in a New York City crackdown (18491 points, 1927 comments)
    3. Mallinckrodt paid 'kickbacks' to keep drug price high, and stuck taxpayers with bill, DOJ lawsuit says (3666 points, 221 comments)
    4. The Latest: Oakland 2nd US city to legalize magic mushrooms (3273 points, 377 comments)
    5. Judge refuses to dismiss Secret Service agent's suit alleging he was detained because he is black (2424 points, 483 comments)
    6. Hundreds protest Alabama's abortion ban at state capitol (1479 points, 819 comments)
    7. Five inmates at a New Jersey jail came down with the mumps. Now the entire facility is under quarantine (1443 points, 95 comments)
    8. 9-year-old pays off lunch debt for his entire third grade class (1157 points, 377 comments)
    9. Manhunt for alleged shooter of several police officers in Alabama trailer park (329 points, 86 comments)
    10. 40,000-year-old severed wolf's head discovered in Siberia (282 points, 81 comments)
  7. 83057 points, 1 submission: Batman264
    1. YouTube Bans Minors From Streaming Unless Accompanied by Adult (83057 points, 2884 comments)
  8. 69290 points, 1 submission: masstrip
    1. Radiohead Donates Money to Climate Change Group Instead of Paying Ransom to Hackers. The band released hours of hacked recordings rather than pay ransom money to the hacker who stole them. (69290 points, 1625 comments)
  9. 65991 points, 1 submission: MindyS1719
    1. R. Kelly charged with 11 new counts of sexual abuse (65991 points, 2563 comments)
  10. 64010 points, 7 submissions: The_Necromancer10
    1. Arthur: Alabama Public Television bans gay wedding episode (58157 points, 5846 comments)
    2. St. Louis and Philadelphia police are investigating reports of racist, anti-Muslim Facebook posts by some city officers (2763 points, 525 comments)
    3. Scientists discover previously unidentified mass beneath surface of the moon (1475 points, 525 comments)
    4. Southern California city's beaches closed due to sewage-laden runoff from Mexico (1021 points, 140 comments)
    5. Former executive sues Goldman Sachs after allegedly being fired for being 'too gay' (259 points, 89 comments)
    6. Greenpeace activists board BP oil rig as it is towed out to sea (258 points, 104 comments)
    7. U.S. fighter jets intercept Russian warplanes off the coast of Alaska (77 points, 60 comments)

Top Commenters

  1. drkgodess (64110 points, 326 comments)
  2. HassleHouff (36148 points, 54 comments)
  3. yAz_94 (25793 points, 4 comments)
  4. netabareking (22017 points, 110 comments)
  5. JLBesq1981 (20680 points, 179 comments)
  6. whats-your-plan-man (18669 points, 9 comments)
  7. limeyhoney (18404 points, 1 comment)
  8. TwilitSky (18077 points, 42 comments)
  9. entropys_child (17975 points, 1 comment)
  10. rbfrbfrbf (17491 points, 10 comments)

Top Submissions

  1. YouTube Bans Minors From Streaming Unless Accompanied by Adult by Batman264 (83057 points, 2884 comments)
  2. Radiohead Donates Money to Climate Change Group Instead of Paying Ransom to Hackers. The band released hours of hacked recordings rather than pay ransom money to the hacker who stole them. by masstrip (69290 points, 1625 comments)
  3. Woman Who Called Michelle Obama An 'Ape' Sentenced To Jail For Defrauding FEMA of $18K by Creasy007 (67771 points, 1327 comments)
  4. R. Kelly charged with 11 new counts of sexual abuse by MindyS1719 (65991 points, 2563 comments)
  5. Boy, 16, fatally shot while trying to sell Xbox: 'They killed my son over nothing,' mom cries by Jo_Jo_In_Tampa (64814 points, 9343 comments)
  6. 9 People Showed Up for a KKK Rally in Dayton, Ohio. They Were Drowned Out by 600 Protestors by Horror_Mango (62854 points, 4799 comments)
  7. Arthur: Alabama Public Television bans gay wedding episode by The_Necromancer10 (58157 points, 5846 comments)
  8. Chinese Military Insider Who Witnessed Tiananmen Square Massacre Breaks a 30-Year Silence by mynameis_neo (57412 points, 3676 comments)
  9. Washington becomes first U.S. state to legalize human composting as alternative to burial/cremation by infiltratedthoughts (56865 points, 2096 comments)
  10. Colorado becomes First State in the Nation to put a Cap on the Price of Insulin by fishin_missin69 (56556 points, 2470 comments)

Top Comments

  1. 22353 points: yAz_94's comment in Boy, 16, fatally shot while trying to sell Xbox: 'They killed my son over nothing,' mom cries
  2. 19672 points: netabareking's comment in Arthur: Alabama Public Television bans gay wedding episode
  3. 18404 points: limeyhoney's comment in 11 people have died in the past 10 days on Mt. Everest due to overcrowding. People at the top cannot move around those climbing up, making them stuck in a "death zone".
  4. 17975 points: entropys_child's comment in YouTube Bans Minors From Streaming Unless Accompanied by Adult
  5. 17359 points: rbfrbfrbf's comment in Boy, 16, fatally shot while trying to sell Xbox: 'They killed my son over nothing,' mom cries
  6. 15429 points: whats-your-plan-man's comment in Tennessee sheriff’s deputy, pastor calls for LGBTQ executions in sermon
  7. 14334 points: ThePerfectSnare's comment in 9 People Showed Up for a KKK Rally in Dayton, Ohio. They Were Drowned Out by 600 Protestors
  8. 13397 points: thefanciestcat's comment in Woman Who Called Michelle Obama An 'Ape' Sentenced To Jail For Defrauding FEMA of $18K
  9. 13345 points: indoninja's comment in Arthur: Alabama Public Television bans gay wedding episode
  10. 12674 points: DicedPeppers's comment in Another American dies while staying at Dominican Republic resort
Generated with BBoe's Subreddit Stats
submitted by subreddit_stats to subreddit_stats [link] [comments]


2019.01.18 00:09 ori3333 Moving out of Bellingham: Final Thoughts

Hello Hamsters,
For the past three yours I have been a proud Bellingham citizen, but now it's time to move back East. This is a wonderful and exciting place to live. I hope everyone here get's to appreciate the beauty they live in.
Here is a list of the things I wish I spent more time doing during my 3 years here.
  1. More hiking: I can always find time to do the little hikes in the area, and wander around Whatcom Falls Park, the Arboretum, etc. My regret that I didn't set aside time to do the big ones and ones that are farther away. Oyster Dome, Mt. Rainear etc.
  2. Wildlife: While hiking and kayaking, I love seeing all the little critters but wish I spent more time learning about them; both terrestrial and aquatic. There are so many resources and people willing to teach. This location is so unique.
  3. Visited Richmond (Canada) for Chinese food: Sounds simple...just a single daycation. We kept putting it off, and the kids don't have passports, so there was guilt on taking a trip they couldn't join us (even if they wanted to).
  4. More night classes at WhatcomCC: When I moved here, Whatcom give a bad first impression, but it's a great school. I eventually realized that but wish I had known that with greater confidence from the start (and taken more classes).
Here is a list of things I feel grateful to have done and be a part of that are due to Bellingham and the PNW.
  1. Sailing. Here the border between land and sea is so thin. Bellingham has so many people here that spent fractions of their lives in the water (especially Alaska). Took a sailing class at the Community Boat House and did a joy ride on the Zodiac. It's something that I would not appreciate back home.
  2. Crabbing. This is my favorite activity in the summer time. Again, not something as accessible back home.
  3. Bellingham Makerspace. I have been involved with the space since my first day here. Taught a couple classes, made great friends, have learned to appreciate some great engineers and artists in the area. It's a unique place. Via the Makerspace, I got a chance to be involved with many local events: Seattle mini-Maker Fair, TAG TechExpo, Downtown Sounds, Art Walk, community art installations, Girl Scouts, bellingham.codes, VR meetup, Arduino meetup...and a bunch more.
  4. Upfront Theater - Our favorite go-to for a fun night. I don't know how many times we have gone this year, at least 15. We have friends that volunteer and perform at the space; they love being a part of it. We love being part of the crowd. And seeing the performers grow over the years is fascinating.
  5. Edison Chicken Parade - It's just a fun whimsical local tradition. It's coming up soon, don't miss it.
  6. Hiking,Kayaking,Skiing - If you live here, try to get a little taste of these things, it's not just for the super-fit adrenaline junkies. It's much more accessible than anywhere else I have ever lived.
  7. Fossil hunting - there are fossils EVERYWHERE if you now where and how to look. My collection has grown quite a bit.
  8. Local Talent - Bellingham has so many talented people here. Artists, writers, developers, musicians. Some are quietly being amazing and others are showing off their work at the Arts Quarry and art walks. I'm not going to name anyone in particular but just want point out that it's been amazing to see how Bellingham cultivates and attracts such refreshing talent.
  9. Let your freak flag fly! - This is the place that allows that. Whatever your into (given that it does not harm others) you can do it here, with little to no judgement, with like minded friends, or strangers that will simply appreciate your passion. Love all the geeks and nerds here. Everything: steampunk, cosplay, BSPC...listing everything is impossible. Definitely my kind of town.
  10. Farmers Market - Summer time, lazy Saturday morning: Wander in and listen to the buskers, eat a samosa , get some local veg. You'll bump into someone you know, or arrange to meet a friend. A farmer's market in NYC is just loud an dirty.
  11. The rain and clouds - SAD is real, but it's something you learn to cope with. The adaptations lead to a more healthy lifestyle. Forces you to spend some time in the daylight (while it lasts) regularly. Slowly the Gore-Tex gear became a functioning wardrobe where your ready to have a good day in any type of rain: Coffee shop rain, hiking in the mud rain, buckets of water rain.
  12. Work/life balance- Just a given around here. In my reality on the East coast, work expectations were always creeping over the life balance line. Here an expectation and example to set have a balance. (Don't get me wrong, work expectations are high in Bellingham. No slackers allowed.)
  13. Food - There are some food places here that will be hard to replace. Chicago style pizza at Fat Pie, Home Skillet (in general), raw fresh oysters at Taylor Farm.
  14. Coffee shops - Tried them all. I have a favorite spot that will be hard to replace.
  15. Kevin Bacon - When I first moved here the "small town" vibe was unsettling. There was probably 3 degrees of separation between myself and anyone in Bellingham. After 3 years, it's only ONE degree. There is something nice about that. I'll miss it.
  16. Friday Harbor Laboratories - They have an open house once a year and it's fascinating to see the research they do. However, we were visiting the island one day and wandered to the campus. A faculty member was saw us looking around and gave a full tour! One of my favorite days in the PNW.
  17. Support local - The local support by the local people is real. Back home the only local loyalty I had was my bagel shop. Here I appreciate and see the advantages of being conscientious of supporting your local resources. Places like Hardware Sales, WinCo, Co-Op, Farmers Market are attractions I take visitors to because they are so unique. Sometimes the City of Bellingham (CoB) contradicts this trend but I digress.
  18. Tattoos - It's part of the culture here, but still misunderstood in the East coast. Complimenting someone on their tattoo around here is like saying "nice hat". It's genuine and unassuming.
Edit: A few comments are mentioning that my tattoo statement is not accurate in regards to the East coast. I'm very happy to hear that and maybe it's just my reality. Bellingham is the first place I have ever lived where there are no expectations or stigma to hide tattoos in a office environment or service industry.
submitted by ori3333 to Bellingham [link] [comments]


2018.10.27 21:55 im_back A list of modern and Shakespearean words

'hood .22 caliber .38 caliber .45 caliber 15 May Organization 18-karat gold 22-karat gold 24-karat gold 24/7 401-k plan 1530s 1750s 1760s 1770s 1780s 1790s 1820s 1830s 1840s 1850s 1860s 1870s 1900s A A battery A level A'man A-horizon A-line A-list A-team ABERGAVENNY ABO antibodies ABO blood group system ACE inhibitor AD ADA-SCID AEDILE AEson AIALVOLIO AIARIA AIDS AND circuit ANDARUS APC ARCHIDAMUS ASAP ASAPH ASCII character ASCII character set ASCII text file ASL AWOL Aachen Aalborg Aalto Aare Aaron Ab Abadan Abandoner Abates Abbe condenser Abel Abelard Abelian group Abelmoschus Aberdare Aberdeen Aberdeen Angus Aberdonian Aberga Abetting Abhorson Abidjan Abies Abilene Abkhaz Abkhazian Abnaki Abney level Abortives Abraham Abraham's bosom Abramis Abrocoma Abronia Abruptly Abruzzi Absey Absorption Abstract Expressionism Absyrtus Abu Dhabi Abu Hafs al-Masri Brigades Abu Sayyaf Abudefduf Abuja Abukir Abutilon Abydos Abyssinian Abyssinian banana Academe Academy Award Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences Academy of Television Arts and Sciences Acadia Acadia National Park Acadian Acalypha Acanthaceae Acanthisitta Acanthocephala Acanthocereus Acanthocybium Acanthophis Acanthopterygii Acanthoscelides Acanthuridae Acanthurus Acapulco Acapulco gold Acaridae Acarina Accessible Accipiter Accipitridae Accipitriformes Accra Accusativo Acer Aceraceae Achaean Acheron Acheronian Acherontia Acheson Acheson process Acheta Achilles Achilles tendon Achilles' heel Achitophel Achoerodus Achomawi Achras Acinonyx Acinos Acipenser Acipenseridae Acnidosporidia Acocanthera Aconcagua Aconitum Acoraceae Acordo Acorus Acrasiomycetes Acrididae Acridotheres Acris Acrobates Acrocarpus Acrocephalus Acroclinium Acrocomia Acropora Acrostichum Actaea Actaeon Actias Actifed Actiniaria Actinidia Actinidiaceae Actiniopteris Actinomeris Actinomycetaceae Actinomycetales Actinomyxidia Actinopoda Action Actitis Actium Acts of the Apostles Adad Adalia Adallas Adam Adam's Peak Adam's needle Adams Adana Adansonia Adapa Adapid Adaptation Adar Addis Ababa Addison's disease Additions to Esther Adelaide Adelges Adelgidae Adelie Adelie Land Aden Adenanthera Adenauer Adenium Adenota Adi Granth Adiantaceae Adiantum Adige Adirondacks Aditi Aditya Adlumia Admiralty Island Admiralty Islands Admiralty Range Admission Day Adon Adonic Adonis Adons Adoptedly Adopts Adramadio Adrian Adriana Adriano Adriatic Adsum Advanced Advanced Research and Development Activity Advancing Advantaging Advent Sunday Adventism Adventist Advertising Adzhar Aeacida Aedes Aegates Isles Aegean Aegean civilization Aegean island Aegeon Aegiceras Aegilops Aegina Aegion Aegisthus Aegles Aegospotami Aegypiidae Aegypius Aegyptopithecus Aemelia Aemilia Aemilius Aeneas Aeneid Aeolian Aeolic Aeolis Aeolus Aeonium Aepyceros Aepyornidae Aepyorniformes Aerial Aerial Servant Aerobacter Aerobacter aerogenes Aertex Aeschylean Aeschylus Aesculapius Aesculus Aesir Aesop Aesop's fables Aether Aethionema Aethusa Aetna Aetobatus Affirmed Afghan hound Afghan monetary unit Afghani Afghanistan Aframomum Afric Africa African African bowstring hemp African chameleon African clawed frog African coral snake African country African crocodile African daisy African elephant African grey African hemp African holly African hunting dog African lily African mahogany African marigold African monitor African oil palm African scented mahogany African violet African walnut African wild ass African-American Africander Africanized bee Afrikaans Afrikaner Afro Afro-Asian Afro-wig Afroasiatic Afrocarpus Aga Agalinis Agamemmon Agamemnon Agamidae Agapornis Agaricaceae Agaricales Agaricus Agassiz Agastache Agathis Agavaceae Agave tequilana Agdestis Agdistis Agee Agelaius Agenize Agenor Agent Orange Ageratina Aghan Agincourt Agkistrodon Aglaia Aglaomorpha Aglaonema Agnatha Agni Agnus Dei Agonidae Agonus Agra Agricola Agrigento Agriocharis Agrippa Agrippina Agrobacterium Agrobacterium tumefaciens Agropyron Agrostemma Agrostis Aguecheek Agueface Ahab Ahriman Ahuehuete Ahura Aiken Ailey Ailuropoda Ailuropodidae Ailurus Aio Air Air Air Combat Command Air Corps Air Force Intelligence Surveillance and Reconnaissance Air Force Research Laboratory Air Force Space Command Air Medal Air National Guard Aire Airedale Aix Aizoaceae Ajaia Ajax Ajuga Akan Akeridae Akhbari Akhenaton Akkadian Akron Aksa Martyrs Brigades Akwa'ala Al Aqabah Al Ladhiqiyah Al Nathir Al-hakim Alabama Alabaman Aladdin Aladdin's lamp Alamo Aland islands Alar Alarbus Alaric Alaska Alaska Native Alaska Peninsula Alaska Range Alaska Standard Time Alaska fur seal Alaska king crab Alaska rein orchid Alaskan Alaskan brown bear Alaskan pipeline Alauda Alaudidae Alban Albania Albanian Albanian monetary unit Albans Albany Albatrellus Albatrellus dispansus Albatrellus ovinus Albee Albers Albert Alberta Alberti Albigenses Albigensian Albigensianism Albino Ape Albion Albright's disease Albuginaceae Albugo Albula Albulidae Albuquerque Alca Alcaeus Alcaic Alcea Alcedinidae Alcedo Alcelaphus Alces Alcibiades Alcidae Alcides Alcoholics Anonymous Alcott Alcyonacea Alcyonaria Alcyone Aldebaran Aldermen Aldrovanda Ale Alectis Alecto Alectoria Alectoris Alectura Alencon Alengon Alepisaurus Aleppo Aletris Aleuria aurantia Aleurites Aleut Aleutian Islands Alex Boncayao Brigade Alexander Alexander Archipelago Alexander I Alexander II Alexander III Alexander VI Alexanders Alexandria Alexandria senna Alexandrian Alexandrian laurel Alexandrine Alexas Aleyrodes Aleyrodidae Alfred Alger Algeria Algerian Algerian centime Algerian dinar Algerian monetary unit Algeripithecus Algeripithecus minutus Algiers Algol Algonkian Algonquian Algren Alhambra Alhazen Ali Ali Baba Alice Aliena Alignment Alisander Alisma Alismataceae Alismatidae Alka-seltzer All Saints' Day All Souls' Day Alla Allah Allayments Alleghenies Allegheny Allegheny chinkapin Allegheny plum Allegheny spurge Allen Allen screw Allen wrench Allentown Allhallowmas Allhallowtide Alliaceae Alliaria Allied Command Atlantic Allied Command Europe Alligatoridae Allionia Allium Allure Almain Almaty Almoravid Alnico Alnus Aloeaceae Alonso Alopecurus Alopex Alopiidae Alopius Alosa Alost Alouatta Alpena Alpha Centauri Alpha Crucis Alphonso Alpine anemone Alpine besseya Alpine celery pine Alpine enchanter's nightshade Alpine fir Alpine glacier Alpine lady fern Alpine mouse-ear Alpine woodsia Alpinia Alpinism Alps Alsace Alsatian Alsobia Alsophila Alsophila pometaria Alstonia Alstroemeriaceae Altai Mountains Altaic Altair Alternanthera Althaea Alton Altoona Alytes Alzheimer's disease Amaethon Amaimon Amanita Amaranthaceae Amaranthus Amarillo Amaryllidaceae Amaterasu Amati Amauropelta Amazon Amazon ant Amazona Amazonian Amazons Amber Golem Amberboa Ambloplites Amblyrhynchus Ambrose Ambrosiaceae Ambrosian Ambystoma Ambystomatidae Ameiuridae Ameiurus Amelanchier Amen Amen-Ra Amentiferae America American American Baptist Convention American Civil War American Dream American English American Falls American Federation of Labor American Federation of Labor and Congress of Industrial Organizations American Indian Day American Labor Party American Legion American Party American Revolution American Revolutionary leader American Samoa American Staffordshire terrier American Standard Code for Information Interchange American Standard Version American Stock Exchange American agave American alligator American angelica tree American arborvitae American barberry American basswood American beech American bison American bittern American black bear American bog asphodel American bugbane American chameleon American chestnut American cockroach American coot American copper American crab apple American cranberry American crayfish American crow American dewberry American dog violet American egret American elder American elm American feverfew American flag American fly honeysuckle American flying squirrel American football American foxhound American frogbit American gallinule American germander American ginseng American green toad American hackberry American harvest mouse American hazel American holly American hop American hornbeam American lady crab American larch American lobster American magpie American maidenhair fern American mastodon American merganser American mistletoe American mountain ash American oil palm American organ American parasol American pasqueflower American persimmon American plaice American plan American quaking aspen American raspberry American rattlebox American red elder American red plum American red squirrel American redstart American rock brake American saddle horse American shrew mole American smelt American smokewood American smooth dogfish American spikenard American star grass American state American sycamore American toad American turkey oak American twinflower American water ouzel American water shrew American water spaniel American watercress American white birch American white oak American white pine American widgeon American wistaria American woodcock American wormseed Americana Americanism Americanization Americanize Amerind Amerindian Amhara Amharic Amia Amianthum Amidst Amiens Amiidae Amish Amish sect Amman Ammodytes Ammodytidae Ammotragus Amnesia Amniota Amoebida Amontillado Amos Amphibolips Amphicarpaea Amphimacus Amphineura Amphioxidae Amphipoda Amphiprion Amphisbaenidae Amphiumidae Ampthill Amsinckia Amsonia Amsterdam Amulet Amundsen Amur Amur privet Amurath Amygdalaceae Amygdalus Amyntas Anabantidae Anabaptism Anabaptist Anabaptist denomination Anabas Anabrus Anacanthini Anacardiaceae Anacardium Anacyclus Anadenanthera Anadenanthera colubrina Anagallis Anagasta Anagyris Anaheim Ananas Ananias Anaphalis Anapsida Anarhichadidae Anarhichas Anas Anasa Anasazi Anaspida Anastatica Anastomus Anatidae Anatolian Anatomie Anaxagoras Anaximander Anaximenes Anchises Anchovies Ancient Greek Ancohuma Ancus Ancylidae Ancylostomatidae Ancylus Andalusia Andalusian Andaman Sea Andean Andean condor Andersen Anderson Andes Andhra Pradesh Andira Andorra Andorran Andpholus Andreaea Andreaeales Andren Andrenidae Andrew Andrews Andricus Andromache Andromeda galaxy Andronici Andronicus Andropogon Androsphinx Andvari Aneides Anemonella Anemopsis Anethum Angara Angas Angelica Angelo Angelus Angering Angevin Angiers Angiospermae Anglais Anglesey Angleterre Anglia Angliae Anglian Anglican Anglican Catholic Anglican Church Anglicanism Anglicism Anglicization Anglish Anglo-American Anglo-Catholicism Anglo-French Anglo-Indian Anglo-Jewish Anglo-Saxon Anglo-Saxon deity Anglo-catholic Anglomania Anglophilia Anglophilic Anglophobia Anglophobic Angola Angolan Angolan monetary unit Angolese Angora Angostura Bridge Angst Anguidae Anguilla Anguillan Anguillidae Anguilliformes Anguillula Anguis Angus Angus Og Anhima Anhimidae Anhingidae Anigozanthus Animal Animalia Animals Animate Animate Statue Animated Anisoptera Anisotremus Anjou Ankara Ankheg Ann Arbor Anna Annaba Annapolis Annapurna Anne Annelida Anniellidae Annihilation Annona Annonaceae Annunciation Annwfn Anobiidae Anodonta Anoectochilus Anogramma Anolis Anomala Anomalopidae Anomia Anomiidae Anopheles Anoplura Anostraca Anouilh Ansar al Islam Anselm Anselmo Anser Anseres Anseriformes Anserinae Anshar Antalya Antananarivo Antarctic Antarctic Circle Antarctic Ocean Antarctic Peninsula Antarctica Antares Antedon Antedonidae Antennaria Antennariidae Antenor Antenorides Anteroom Anthemis Antheraea Anthericum Antheropeas Anthidium Anthoceropsida Anthoceros Anthocerotaceae Anthocerotales Anthonomus Anthony Anthozoa Anthriscus Anthropophagi Anthropophaginian Anthus Anthyllis Anti-Masonic Party Antiates Antichrist Anticipating Antido Antidorcas Antigone Antigonia Antigonus Antigua Antigua and Barbuda Antiguan Antilles Antilocapra Antilocapridae Antilope Antioch Antiochus Antiopa Antipathy Antipholus Antipholuses Antipodes Antirrhinum Antium Antlia Antofagasta Antoniad Antonine Wall Antoninus Antonio Antonius Antonius Pius Antony Antrozous Antum Antwerpen Anu Anubis Anunnaki Any Anzac Anzio Aotus Apalachicola Apalachicola rosemary Apartment Apatura Ape Apeldoorn Apemantus Apennines Apgar score Aphasmidia Aphididae Aphidoidea Aphis Aphriza Aphrodite Aphrophora Aphyllanthaceae Aphyllanthes Aphyllophorales Apia Apidae Apios Apis Apium Aplectrum Aplodontia Aplodontiidae Aplysia Aplysiidae Apocrypha Apocynaceae Apocynum Apodemus Apodidae Apodiformes Apogon Apogonidae Apoidea Apollinaire Apollinem Apollo Apollo asteroid Apollo program Apollodorus Aporocactus Appalachia Appalachian Appalachians Appaloosa Apparatus Appearance Appian Way Appleton Appleton layer Appollos Apricocke April April Fools' April fool Apsu Aptenodytes Apterygidae Apterygiformes Apus Aquarius Aquifoliaceae Aquila Aquilon Aquinas Aquitaine Ara Arab Arab League Arab-Israeli War Arabia Arabian Arabian Desert Arabian Nights' Entertainment Arabian Peninsula Arabian Sea Arabian camel Arabian coffee Arabian jasmine Arabic Arabic alphabet Arabic numeral Arabidopsis Arabidopsis lyrata Arabidopsis thaliana Arabis Arabist Araceae Arachis Arachnida Arafat Arafura Sea Aragon Araguaia Arales Araliaceae Aram Aramaic Aramean Aramus Aran Islands Aranea Araneae Aranyaka Arapaho Ararat Aras Arauca Araucariaceae Araujia Arawak Arawakan Arawn Arbitratour Arbor Day Arc Arca Arcadia Arcadian Arcadic Arcane Arcas Arcellidae Arceuthobium Archaeornithes Archean Archelaus Arches National Park Archiannelida Archibald Archidiskidon Archilochus Archilochus colubris Archimedes Archimedes' principle Archmagi Archosargus Archosauria Arcidae Arcite Arcites Arctic Archipelago Arctic Circle Arctic Ocean Arctic char Arctic ground squirrel Arctictis Arctiidae Arctium Arctocebus Arctocephalus Arctostaphylos Arctotis Arcturus Arde Ardea Ardeidae Arden Ardennes Ardisia Arecidae Arenaria Arenaviridae Arendt Arenga Areopagite Areopagus Arequipa Ares Argasidae Argentina Argentine Argentine hemorrhagic fever Argentine monetary unit Argentinian Argentinidae Argier Argiope Argiopidae Argive Argo Argonauta Argonautidae Argos Argu Argun Argus Argusianus Argynnis Argyranthemum Argyreia Argyrotaenia Argyroxiphium Arhat Arhus Ariachne Ariadne Ariana Arianism Arianrhod Ariel Aries Ariidae Arikara Arilus Arinado Ariocarpus Ariomma Arion Arisaema Arisarum Aristarchus Aristarchus of Samos Aristolochia Aristolochiaceae Aristolochiales Aristophanes Aristotelia Aristotelian Aristotelian logic Aristotelianism Aristotle Arius Arizona Arizona ash Arizona cypress Arizona sycamore Arizona white oak Arizonan Arjuna Arkansan Arkansas Arkansas kingbird Arlington Armadillidiidae Armadillidium Armageddon Armagnac Armata Corsa Armed Forces Day Armed Islamic Group Armenia Armenian Armenian Church Armenian Secret Army for the Liberation of Armenia Armenian monetary unit Armeria Armigero Armillaria Armillaria caligata Armillaria ponderosa Armillaria zelleri Armillariella Arminian Arminian Baptist Arminian Church Arminianism Arminius Armor Armoracia Armors Arms Armstrong Army High Performance Computing Research Center Army for the Liberation of Rwanda Arnhem Arnica montana Arno Arnold Arnold of Brescia Arnold-Chiari deformity Arnoseris Aroused Arp Arragon Arraigning Arrhenatherum Arrhenius Arrow Arrows Artamidae Artamus Artaxerxes I Artaxerxes II Artemia Artemidorus Artemis Artemision at Ephesus Artesius Arthropoda Arthropteris Arthur Arthurian Arthurian legend Articles of Confederation Artiodactyla Artocarpus Artois Aruba Arulo Arundinaria Arundo Aruru Arvicola Arviragus Aryan Asahikawa Asama Asanga Asarh Asarum Asbat al-Ansar Ascanius Ascaphidae Ascaphus Ascaridae Ascaridia Ascaris Asch Ascidiaceae Asclepiadaceae Asclepias Ascomycetes Ascomycota Ascophyllum Ascribes Asgard Ash Can Ash Wednesday Ashcan School Ashe Asher Asheville Ashford Ashkenazi Ashkhabad Ashton Ashur Ashurbanipal Asia Asia Minor Asian Asian American Asian Russia Asian black grouse Asian coral snake Asian country Asian crocodile Asian horseshoe crab Asian influenza Asian longhorned beetle Asian tiger mosquito Asian wild ox Asiatic black bear Asiatic flying squirrel Asiatic shrew mole Asiatic sweetleaf Asilidae Asimina Asimov Asin Asio Ask Jeeves Asmara Asmath Aspalathus Asparagaceae Aspergillaceae Aspergillus Aspergillus fumigatus Asperula Asphodelaceae Asphodeline Asphodelus Aspidelaps Aspidiotus Aspidophoroides Aspleniaceae Asplenium Asprayes Assam Assamese Assassin Assemblies of God Associate in Applied Science Associate in Arts Associate in Nursing Associated Association for the Advancement of Retired Persons Association of Southeast Asian Nations Assum Assuming Assur Assyria Assyrian Assyriology Astacidae Astacus Astaire Astana Astarte Asteridae Asteroidea Astor Astraea Astragalus Astral Astrea Astreus Astreus hygrometricus Astreus pteridis Astroloma Astronium Astronomical Unit Astrophyton Astrophyton muricatum Astropogon Asuncion Asura Asvins Aswan Aswan High Dam Atacama Desert Atacama Trench Atakapa Atalanta Ataturk Ate Ateles Aten Ates Athanasian Creed Athanasianism Athanasius Athapaskan Atharva-Veda Athelstan Athena Athene Athenian Athenians Athens Atherinidae Atherinopsis Atherurus Athiorhodaceae Athol Athos Athrotaxis Athyrium Atlanta Atlantic Atlantic City Atlantic Coast Atlantic Time Atlantic bottlenose dolphin Atlantic cod Atlantic croaker Atlantic halibut Atlantic herring Atlantic manta Atlantic puffin Atlantic ridley Atlantic sailfish Atlantic salmon Atlantic sea bream Atlantic spiny dogfish Atlantic tripletail Atlantic walrus Atlantis Atlas Atlas Mountains Atlas cedar Atmosphere Atomic Energy Commission Atonement Atreus Atrichornis Atrichornithidae Atriplex Atropa Atropidae Atropos Atsugewi Attack Attalea Attested Attic Attica Atticus Attila Attlee Attraction Aubrey Auchincloss Auckland Aucuba Auden Audenesque Auditory Audre Audrey Audubon Audubon's caracara Audubon's warbler Aufidius Aufidiuses Augean Augean stables Augeas Augsburg Confession Augur Augures Augury August Augusta Augustan Augustine Augustinian Augustinian Canons Augustinian Hermits Augustinian order Augustus Aulacorhyncus Aulis Aulostomidae Aulostomus Aum Shinrikyo Aumerle Aura Aureolaria Auricularia Auriculariaceae Auriculariales Auriga Auriparus Aurora Auschwitz Austen Austerlitz Austin Austin Friar Austin Friars Australasia Australasian Australia Australian Australian Alps Australian Desert Australian blacksnake Australian cockroach Australian coral snake Australian dollar Australian grass tree Australian hare's foot Australian heath Australian magpie Australian nettle Australian pea Australian pine Australian pitcher plant Australian reed grass Australian sea lion Australian state Australian sumac Australian terrier Australian turtledove Australopithecus afarensis Australopithecus africanus Australopithecus boisei Australopithecus robustus Austria Austria-Hungary Austrian Austrian monetary unit Austro-Asiatic Austrocedrus Austronesia Austronesian Austrotaxus Authorized Version Authorizing Authours Autolycus Automeris Auvergne Avahi Avalokitesvara Ave Maria Avena Avenger Averrhoa Averroes Aves Avesta Avestan Avicenna Avicennia Avicenniaceae Avignon Avogadro Avogadro's law Avogadro's number Avon Axe Axe Beak Ayr Ayrshire Aythya Ayurveda Az Zarqa Azadirachta Azerbaijan Azerbaijani Azerbaijani monetary unit Azeri Azolla Azollaceae Azores Aztec Aztecan B B battery B cell B-52 B-complex vitamin B-flat clarinet B-girl B-horizon BANDIT BANDITTI BASSET BB BB gun BC BCE BLACKAMOORS BLOUNT BOURCHIER BURGH BVD Ba Baader Meinhof Gang Baal Babar Babau Demon Babbitt metal Babesiidae Babinski Baboon Babylon Babylonia Babylonian Babylonian Captivity Babyrousa Bacchanals Baccharis Bacchus Bach Bachelor of Arts Bachelor of Arts in Library Science Bachelor of Arts in Nursing Bachelor of Divinity Bachelor of Laws Bachelor of Literature Bachelor of Medicine Bachelor of Music Bachelor of Naval Science Bachelor of Science Bachelor of Science in Architecture Bachelor of Science in Engineering Bachelor of Theology Bachelour Bacillaceae Bacillariophyceae Bacillus anthracis Bacillus subtilis Backare Backeward Backpack Bacteroidaceae Bacteroides Bactrian camel Bad Lands Badaga Bade Badger Badlands National Park Badly Baffin Bay Baffin Island Bag Baghdad Bagot Bahai Bahaism Bahamas Bahamian Bahamian dollar Bahia Blanca Bahia grass Bahrain Bahrain dinar Bahraini Bahrainian monetary unit Bai Bailey bridge Baiomys Bairava Bairdiella Baisakh Bajazet Bakelite Bakersfield Bakke decision Baku Bakunin Balaena Balaeniceps Balaenicipitidae Balaenidae Balaenoptera Balaenopteridae Balanchine Balanidae Balanus Balarama Balaton Balder Baldwin Balearic Islands Balenciaga Balfour Bali Balinese Balistes Balistidae Balkan Balkan Peninsula Balkan Wars Balkan country Balkanize Balkans Ball Ballota Balls Balmoral Castle Balochi Balor Balsaminaceae Balsamorhiza Balthasar Balthazar Baltic Baltic State Baltic-Finnic Baltimore Baltimore oriole Balto-Slavic Balzac Balzacian Bam Bamako Bambusa Bambuseae Banbury Banded mail Bandung Banff Bangalore Bangiaceae Bangkok Bangladesh Bangladeshi Bangladeshi monetary unit Bangor Bangui Banister Banjul Bank of England Bank of Japan Banket Bankhead Bankia Bankrupts Banks Bannockburn Banquo Banti's disease Banting Bantoid Bantu Bantu-speaking Baphia Baptisia Baptist Baptist Church Baptist denomination Baptista Baptistic doctrine Baraka Barany Barbadian Barbados Barbados dollar Barbados gooseberry Barbarea Barbarossa Barbary Barbary Coast Barbary ape Barbason Barbed Devil Barberton daisy Barbery Barbuda Barcelona Bardeen Bardolph Barents Sea Bargulus Bari Barkley Barkloughly Barkskin Barly Barnaby's thistle Barnardine Barnardo Barnet Barnum Barrabas Barranquilla Barrel Barrie Barrow's goldeneye Barrymore Barson Barstow Barth Barthelme Barthol Bartholdi Bartholin Bartholin's gland Bartholomew Bartle Frere Bartlesville Bartok Bartram Juneberry Bartramia Baruch Baryshnikov Basan Basel Basic English Basidiomycetes Basidiomycota Basilicata Basilisco Basiliscus Basilisk Basimecu Basingstoke Basins Basket Maker Basotho Basque Basque Homeland and Freedom Basra Bassanio Bassariscidae Bassariscus Basse-Normandie Basseterre Bassia Bassianus Basta Bastard Sword Bastille Day Bat Bata Bataan Batchelour Bathsheba Bathyergidae Bathyergus Batidaceae Batis Batna Baton Rouge Baton Rouge Bridge Batrachoididae Batrachoseps Battaile Battle Axe Battle of Britain Battle of Kerbala Battle of Puebla Battle of Wake Battle of the Ardennes Bulge Battle of the Marne Battle of the Spanish Armada Baudelaire Bauhaus Bauhinia Bauldricke Baum Bavaria Bavarian Bavarian blue Bavarian cream Bavian Bay Stater Bay of Bengal Bay of Biscay Bay of Fundy Bay of Naples Bayard Bayes Bayes' postulate Bayes' theorem Bayesian Baying Baynard Bayonne Bayonne Bridge Bayrut Beacon Hill Beakes Bear Beatitude Beatles Beatrice Beau Beaufort Beaufort Sea Beaufort scale Beaujolais Beaumond Beaumont Beaumontia Beautie Beauvoir Beaverbrook Bechtel crab Becker muscular dystrophy Beckett Beckley Beckman thermometer Beckoning Becquerel Bede Bedford Bedford cord Bedlam Bedlington terrier Bedouin Bedroll Bee Beech Beecher Beer Beerbohm Beere Beethoven Beethovenian Beetle Befitting Beggared Begin Begoniaceae Begrim Behrens Beijing Beings Beira Bel Bel and the Dragon Belamcanda Belarius Belarus Belarusian Belarusian monetary unit Beleev Belem Belemnitidae Belemnoidea Belfast Belgia Belgian Belgian endive Belgian franc Belgian hare Belgian sheepdog Belgian waffle Belgium Belgrade Belisarius Belize Belize dollar Belladona Bellario Belle Isle cress Bellerophon Bellingham Bellini Bellis Belloc Bellona Belmont Belmont Park Belmont Stakes Belo Horizonte Belona Belonidae Belostomatidae Belsen Belshazzar Belt Belzebub Bemidji Bemisia Ben Gurion Ben Sira Benchley Benday process Benedicite Benedick Benedict Benedict XIV Benedict XV Benedictine Benedictine order Benelux Benet Benford's law Bengal Bengal light Bengal tiger Bengali Benghazi Benin Benin franc Beninese Benjamin Benjamin Franklin Bridge Bennet Bennett Bennettitaceae Bennettitales Bennettitis Bennington Benny Bentham Bentii Bentivolii Benton Benvolio Benzedrine Beowulf Berber Berberidaceae Berberis Bercy Berg Bergamo Bergen Bergman Bergomask Bergson Beria Bering Bering Sea Bering Strait Bering Time Berith Berkeley Berkshire Berkshires Berlage Berlin airlift Berlin doughnut Berliner Berlioz Bermoothes Bermuda Bermuda Triangle Bermuda buttercup Bermuda cedar Bermuda chub Bermuda dollar Bermuda grass Bermuda maidenhair Bermuda onion Bermuda plan Bermuda rig Bermuda shorts Bermudan Bern Bernard Bernese mountain dog Bernhardt Bernini Bernoulli Bernoulli's law Bernstein Berowne Berra Berri Berserker Berserking Berteroa Bertholletia Bertillon Bertillon system Bertolucci Bertram Berwick Berycomorphi Berzelius Beseeching Bess Bessel Bessemer Bessemer converter Bessemer process Bessera Besseya Bessy Beta Centauri Beta Crucis Betelgeuse Bethe Bethlehem Bethune Bettongia Betula Betulaceae Beutie Beveridge Beverly Hills Bevin Bevis Bewick's swan Bewitching Bewtie Bezonian Bhadon Bhaga Bhagavad-Gita Bhumi Devi Bhutan Bhutanese Bhutanese monetary unit Bi Bianca Bianco Bibb lettuce Bible Belt Biblical Aramaic Bibos Biddy Bidens Biedermeier Bierce Big Ben Big Bend Big Bend National Park Big Blue Big Dipper Big Sioux River Big Sur Bigfoot Bight of Benin Bignonia Bignoniaceae Bigot Bihar Bihari Bill of Rights Billings Biloxi Binet Binet-Simon Scale Binghamton Bioko Biondello Bird Birmingham Birnam Biscayne Bay Biscayne National Park Biscutella Bishkek Bismarck Bismarck Archipelago Bismarck Sea Bismarckian Bissau Bithynia Bitis Bittacidae Biu-Mandara Bivalvia Bizet Blaberus Black African Black Death Black English Black Forest Black Hand Black Hawk Black Hills Black Hole of Calcutta Black Muslim Black Panther Black Panthers Black Pudding Black Rock Desert Black Sea Black September Movement Black Widow Black and Tan Black man Black race Black woman Blackburn Blackfoot Blackfriars Blackfriers Blackheath Blackmere Blackpool Blacksburg Blackshirt Blackwall hitch Blade Blaia Zimondal Blair Blake Blanc Blandfordia Blank Blanket Blantyre Blarina Blarney Stone Blast Blasting Blastocladia Blastocladiales Blastodiaceae Blastomyces Blatta Blattella Blattidae Blattodea Blechnaceae Blechnum Blending Blenheim Blenheim spaniel Blenniidae Blennioidea Blennius Blephilia Bleriot Bless Bletilla Bletilla striata Blida Bligh Blighia Blighty Blind Blindness Blink Blink Dog Blissus Blithild Blitzstein Bloch Block and tackle Blocke Bloemfontein Blois Blok Bloody Mary Bloomeria Bloomfield Bloomington Bloomsbury Bloomsbury Group Blue Dragon Blue Mountain tea Blue Nile Blue Ridge Mountains Bluebeard Blur Boann Boar Boarding Boat Boblibindo Boccaccio Bocchus Bodhisattva Bodi Bodie Bodily Bodo-Garo Bodoni Bodykins Boehme Boehmenism Boehmeria Boeotia Boeotian Boer War Boethius Bofors gun Bogart Bogartian Bogota Bohemia Bohemian Bohemian waxwing Bohr Bohr theory Bohun Boidae Boise Bokmal Bolbitis Boletaceae Boletellus Boletellus russellii Boletus Boletus chrysenteron Boletus edulis Boletus luridus Boletus mirabilis Boletus pallidus Boletus pulcherrimus Boletus pulverulentus Boletus roxanae Boletus subvelutipes Boletus variipes Boletus zelleri Boleyn Bolingbroke Bolivian Bolivian monetary unit Bollywood Bolshevik Bolshevism Bolt Boltonia Bolts Boltzmann Boltzmann's constant Bolzano Bomarea Bombacaceae Bombax Bombina Bombus Bombycidae Bombycilla Bombycillidae Bombyliidae Bombyx Bonaire Bonasa Bone Golem Bonete Bonfire Night Bonfyres Bonhoeffer Boniface Boniface VIII Bonn Bonney Bonos Bontemps Bonville Bony Book Book of Common Prayer Book of Mormon Booke Boole Boolean Boolean logic Boone Bootes Boots Boott's goldenrod Borachio Boraginaceae Borago Borassus Bordeaux Bordeaux mixture Border collie Border terrier Boreas Borges Borgia Boring Beetle Born Bornean Borneo Borodin Borodino Borrelia burgdorferi Borstal Bos Bosch Bose Bose-Einstein statistics Boselaphus Bosko Boskop man Bosnia Bosnia and Herzegovina Bosnian Bosporus Bosporus Bridge Boston Boston Harbor Boston Tea Party Boston baked beans Boston bull Boston cream pie Boston fern Boston ivy Boston lettuce Boston rocker Bostonian Boswell Boswellia Boswellia carteri Bosworth Bosworth Field Botaurus Bothidae Bothrops Botrychium Botswana Botswana monetary unit Botswanan Botticelli Bottle Bouciqualt Boudge Bougainville Bougainville Trench Boulez Boult Bourbon Bourdeaux Bourgogne Bourse Bouteloua Bouvet Island Bouvier des Flandres Bouvines Bouyei Bovidae Bovinae Bovini Bow Bowditch Bowdler Bowdlerism Bowery Bowie Bowie knife Bowiea Bowl Bowman's capsule Box Boxing Day Boy Scouts Boy Scouts of America Boyet Boykinia Boyle Boyle's law Boyne Bozeman Brabancon griffon Brabant Brabantio Bracers Brachinus Brachiopoda Brachychiton Brachycome Brachystegia Brachyura Bracy Bradbury Bradford Bradley Bradley method of childbirth Bradley's spleenwort Bradstreet Brady Braga Bragg Bragi Brahe Brahma Brahmana Brahmanism Brahmaputra Brahmi Brahms Brahui Brainford Brakenbury Brama Bramante Bramidae Bramley's Seedling Branchiobdella Branchiobdellidae Branchiopoda Branchiostegidae Branchiura Brancusi Brand Brandenburg Brandon Brandt Branta Braque Brasenia Brasilia Brass Dragon Brassia Brassica Bratislava Brattleboro Braun Braun's holly fern Braunschweig Braxton-Hicks contraction Brazier Brazil Brazilian Brazilian guava Brazilian monetary unit Brazilian pepper tree Brazilian rosewood Brazilian trumpeter Brazos Brazzaville Bread Breakes Breasting Breathing Brecht Brecknock Breed's Hill Bremen Bremerhaven Bren Brenner Pass Brer Rabbit Brescia Brest Bretagne Breton Breuer Brevoortia Brezhnev Briareus Brickellia Bridegroomes Bridehouse Bridgenorth Bridgeport Bridges Bridget Bridgetown Brie Brigand Brighter Brightness Brighton Brigit Brihaspati Brilliance Brindisi Brinell number Brinton Brioschi Brisbane Bristol Bristol Channel Bristow Britain Britaine Britaines Britannia metal Britannic British British Cabinet British Columbia British Commonwealth British Crown British Empire British Imperial System British Isles British Parliament British Virgin Islands British capacity unit British empiricism British monetary unit British pound British shilling British thermal unit Britisher Briton Britons Brittany Brittany spaniel Britten Brix scale Brno Broadway Brobdingnag Brobdingnagian Broca Broca's area Brocas Brockhouse Brodmann's area Broglie Bromelia Bromeliaceae Bromo-seltzer Bromus Bronte Bronte sisters Bronx Bronx-Whitestone Bridge Bronze Dragon Bronze Star Medal Brooch Brooke Brooklyn Brooklyn Bridge Brooks Broom Broome Brosmius Brotulidae Broussonetia Brown Swiss Brown University Browne Brownian movement Browning Browning automatic rifle Browning machine gun Brownist Brownshirt Brownsville Bruce Brucella Bruch Bruchidae Bruchus Bruckenthalia Bruckner Brueghel Bruges Brugmansia Brule Brumaire Brummagem Brummell Brummie Brunanburh Brundusium Brunei Brunei dollar Bruneian Brunelleschi Brunfelsia Brunhild Bruno Brunswick Brunswick stew Brussels carpet Brussels lace Brutus Bruxelles Brya Bryaceae Bryales Bryan Bryce Canyon National Park Brymd Bryophyta Bryopsida Bryozoa Brythonic Bryum Bubalus Bubble Buber Bubulcus Buccinidae Bucconidae Bucephala Buceros Bucerotidae Buchanan Bucharest Buchenwald Buchloe Buchner Buckingham Buckingham Palace Bucklersbury Budapest Buddha Buddhism Buddhist Budge Budorcas Buena Vista Buenos Aires Bufonidae Buganda Bugbear Building Bujumbura Bukharin Bulawayo Bulette Bulgaria Bulgarian Bulgarian monetary unit Bull Bull Run Bull Shark Bullcalf Bullen Bullens Bullock's oriole Bulmer Bulnesia Bultmann Bumelia Bunche Bundesbank Bungarus Bunker Buster Bunker Hill Bunsen Bunuel Bunyan Bunyaviridae Buphthalmum Bura Burbage Burbank Burberry Bureau of Alcohol Tobacco and Firearms Bureau of Customs Bureau of Diplomatic Security Bureau of Engraving and Printing Bureau of Intelligence and Research Bureau of Justice Assistance Bureau of Justice Statistics Bureau of the Census Burger Burgoyne Burgundy Burhinidae Burhinus Burk Burke Burkina Faso Burkina Faso franc Burlington Burma padauk Burmannia Burmanniaceae Burmese Burmese cat Burnett Burnham Burning Burns Burnside Burroughs Bursera Burseraceae Burt Burton Burundi Burundi franc Burundian Bush administration Bushido Bushnell Bushy Butea Buteo Butterfield Buttress Buxaceae Buxus Buzzards Bay Byblos Bydgoszcz Byelorussian Byrd Byron Byzantine Byzantine Empire Byzantine architecture Byzantium C C battery C clef C compiler C major C program C-clamp C-horizon C-ration C-reactive protein C.O.D. CD drive CD player CD-R CD-ROM CD-ROM drive CE CENTURION CHORISTERS CLEOPATPA COBOL COUNTREYMAN CPU board Ca Cabell Cabernet Cabernet Sauvignon grape Cabin class Cabind Cabomba Cabombaceae Cabot Cacajao Cacalia Cachi Cacicus Cactaceae Caddo Cades Cadiz Cadmus Cadra Cadwal Cadwallader Caeciliidae Caelius Caelum Caenolestes Caenolestidae Caesalpinia Caesalpiniaceae Caesalpinioideae Caesar Caesar salad Caesarea Caesarian Caesarion Caesars Cagliostro Cagney Cahita Cain Cairene Cairina Cairo Caithness Caius Cajanus Cajun Cakchiquel Cakile Calaber Calabria Caladium bicolor Calais Calamagrostis Calamintha Calandrinia Calchas Calcuttan Calder Calderon Caldron Caldwell Caledonia Caledonian Canal Calen Calf Calgary Cali Cali cartel Caliban Calibans Calidris California California Personality Inventory California black oak California black walnut California bluebell California box elder California condor California four o'clock California fuchsia California lady's slipper California laurel California newt California nutmeg California pitcher plant California poppy California privet California quail California redwood California sagebrush California sea lion California single-leaf pinyon California sycamore California whipsnake California white oak California wine Californian Caligula Calipolis
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2018.08.29 19:22 ATR2004 [SECRET]Forming the SCP foundation.

Cascadia has been chosen to host the AUSPEX central command, as well as the first ever AUSPEX containment site due to it's favorable locations, and pre-existing infrastructure in the way of large secret bunkers.
AUSPEX is an agency that will consist of Cascadia, the Northern Union, and Norway. AUSPEX is dedicated to the capture, containment and if necessary, termination of paranormal beings
AUSPEX central command HQ
We have determined that the Project Broken Union bunker would be a good place for the HQ. The bunker was built when tensions with the Midwest were at an all time high. It was incredibly expensive, so it's good to get some use out of it. The bunker has some of the best tech available to us already, and has a maximum capacity of 10 thousand troops at any time, though it can easily work with less, as it is right now with only 500. Most of the needed facilities are already there, and just need to be activated, which is simple enough to do. We have a small budget of 50 million dollars for the minor renovations that are needed to make it more suitable for something like AUSPEX. The bunkers current power generation system will be swapped out with more effective and modern fusion reactors that the NU has developed. The cost of the reactor is not included in 50 million renovation costs, that's a separate thing. Extra security will also be added to the bunker just in case. The current security is pretty good considering the purpose the bunker was built for.(Intense Guerrilla warfare).
The 500 current BU personnel will be transformed into AUSPEX soldiers, with this project BU is also dissolved. As the owners of this bunker we feel like we should have a large part in it's security we will send 1500 regular men from the military as part of our contribution to AUSPEX putting our numbers at 2000 Central command personnel. A few CSWC(That secretive Cascadian research agency) scientists and engineers will also be stationed at the base(Now called AUSPEX HQ, or Central command bunker, whatever floats your boat) to assist in advanced research and construction.
Renovations will take 6 months, at maximum, they are only small renovations after all.
Containment site 1
Cascadia has also been chosen to host the containment site for whatever paranormal entities we capture. After discussion with the NU we have chosen these mountains in Alaska to host CS-1(Containment site 1). Thanks to our construction of the BU bunker we have useful experience with carving out mountains into large scale military complexes. This will be on a much smaller scale than the BU bunker. After all, we don't think there will be some crazy number like 5000 paranormal entities. The mountains will be carved out into a complex meant to contain paranormal beings, and also to house some troops or scientists who may be on the site long term. We will be building an airfield as well, since this base is only accessible by air. Because an airfield can easily be seen from space, we will disguise its purpose as an Arctic research base, hiding our true intentions. The base is meant to host usually 1000 guard personnel, but has room for an extra 1000 as reserve if needed. The building will originally be built to contain 150 beings. Since we don't know what we are dealing with, we will build 50 reinforced, but normal containment units and leave space for 100 special units in case special containment procedures are required for some of them. This building is much smaller than the BU bunker and will only cost 1 billion dollars. We are going to use everything we have in the way of construction tech to get this bunker done in 2-3 years. Preparations will be made for possible future expansion to the site if needed.
Formation of AUSPEX
While we are waiting 2-3 years for CS-1, we can still build up AUSPEX in the Central HQ. Once CS-1 is done, we will be contributing 400 troops to guard the base. We will call upon the NU and Norway to send however many troops they want to the Central HQ, and ask them to have troops ready for CS-1. The AUSPEX command structure is a sort of mix of high ranking military members, scientists, engineers, pretty much anyone important to AUSPEX goals from Cascadia, the NU and Norway. Different security clearances will be given out to people who are more or less important to AUSPEX. CSWC Scientists and engineers will be on this site as well.
We will be scouting our military for our best people to join AUSPEX. Every member will be sworn to secrecy, with major consequences for those who try to leak. We will use our own knowledge to give our troops special forces training, but we can also ask the NU for some help since they are better at it.
Other nations role
This isn’t just a Cascadian thing, the NU and Norway are also a part of it. 500 Norwegian special forces will be joining us, and 1000 NU special forces will also be joining us. As well as 500 inuit volunteers. The NU and Norway may choose where to place the forces they have dedicated to AUSPEX. The 500 volunteers will also receive training.
Power
The two reactors we need are 700 million each. Quite a good investment.
End notes
Once AUSPEX is formed we will begin collaborating with AU members, and possibly other agencies of similar purpose across the world to eliminate the paranormal threat.
AUSPEX
CAPTURE, CONTAIN, CONTROL
[m]I’ve just been told that Norway was sending over 500 special forces. If this is wrong tell me.
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2018.08.02 00:47 Texas1971 Carollaisms (August)

Carollaisms (August)

Band Names/Rap Stars

Mitt Romney and the One Percenters (ACS)
ManAyz - Rap star (LL)
D'Bagz - Rap star (LL)
Maxi Pad - An all-girl band that knows how to rock (LL)
Dick Tingle - One of the best blues men in the business (Show?)
Lynette and the Lackeys (ACS)
Straw Hat and the Bowties - Jerry Springer's dixieland band who plays at the Knott's Berry Farm Good Time Theater (ACS)
Gut Fluffer (ACS)
Johnny Beaumont and The Legionnaires - All wear matching powder blue tuxedoes (ACS)
Automatic Vaginismus – Great band name (LL)
Dissuade/D’ Suede - Rappeproducer of Kanye/one of Kim's ex beaus (ACS)
Starchy Deuce - Band that should be produced by D' Suede (ACS)
Narthex - (ACS)
Epileptic Declawed Hamster - That is a helluva punk band right there (ACS)
Loretta Lynch - Country singer who sang "Stand By Your Man" (ACS)
The Areolas - Covered an Eagles song in the ‘90s (ACS)
Fleece and Flannel - One of the best lesbian acoustic duos you will ever see (ACS)
3 Chainz - Rap star (ACS)
Blues Squatter - Adam's dad’s band name (ACS)
Tampon Kayak - One of Seattle's greatest, but least heard of indie bands (ACS)
Jizz Grenade (LL)
Dryer Fire - Hot indie band name (ACS)
Iranian Revolutionary Guard - Prince's backup band (ACS)
Rape Kit - Name of Adam's band from high school (ACS)
Nog Bong - A band Adam was in in high school (ACS)
Bum Blazer – Adam’s band in high school (ACS)
White Trash Kimchi - Another good band name (Bald Bryan) (ACS)
White Noise - Adam's rap name (ADS)
Promethazine - Lil Wayne's sister (ADS)
Light Rail - Great Rap name (ADS)
Danny In The Joint - Good indie band name (ACS)
Anal Cleft - One of the worst reggae singers to leave Jamaica (ACS)
Anal Cleft and the Taints - Great reggae group (ACS)
MEL-ROL - One of The Spice Girls (AOTH)
D'bris - Great Rap name (ACS)
Cisgender - A militant female rapper....for the ladies (ACS)
Krav Maga (1) - Country singing Jew (ACS)
Lynette and Paulette - Sounds like a singing duo from the 60's (RD)
Nuts In The Sink - Name of Ray’s new band (Ray) (AOTH)
SubDude - Pete Holmes' rap name (ACS)
Ray And The Enemas - Blues singer and his backup band (ADS)
Yakov Crutchfield - He has a show in Branson (ADS)
Mac 18 - Adam’s favorite rapper (RD)
Tremble Lean – Adam’s rap name (ACBSL)
Sticker Back – Worst band out of Canada ever (ACS)
Pennywise and Pound Foolish - A band from the ‘90's (RD)
Strawberry Shortcake's Neti Pot - Great band name (Twitter)
Puffy Elon Musk - Worst rapper ever (ACS)
Pantera Club at Laguna Seca (Twitter)
Savage Body Attack - New wave romantic band Ace was in when he was 19 (FBL)
Jumping Jazzy Jews - Jeff Goldblum's jazz band (ACS)
Snore Cherry - Great band name (ACS)
Pat Benatard - Pat Benatar cover band (ACS)
Rancid Nuts - Good band name (ACS)
Gary And The Knotholes - Good band name (AOTH)
Tampon Canoe - Good indie band (ACS)
One Erection - A good boy band (ACS)
Flushin' Dew - A good country duo (ACS)
Armo Jeweler - Great band name (RD)
Radon - (Lynette thinks) there a Whitesnake cover-band (ACS)
The Taste Of Ace - Great band name (ACS)
King Grape and the Raisinettes (GS)
Concord Grape and the Raisinettes (GS)
Gary Taco - Love that band (ACS)
The Silence Breakers (2) - Good punk band (Gina) (ACS)
Daddy’s Got A Dually – Good country song (ACS)
Dip Curtain - Good indie band (ACS)
Crystal Lobbyists - Sounds like a great techno band (ACS)
Narcissistic Monk -Great indie band (GS)
Sporty Prius - Worst of the Spice Girls (ACS)
Laden and Bravado - 70s duo who opened for Seals n Crofts (ACS)
The Bouncers - great band name (ACS)
Hurry up and make sense (1) - a good talking heads album (ACS)
Appropriate Sombrero - Maxapada’s next band name (Bryan) (ACS)
Flirtatious Contrail - great rap name (GS)
Jack Johnson - Guy from The White Stripes aka The Black Stripes (ACS)
Sophistry - A great Carol King album (ADS)

Song Titles

Meatless Mondays - Horrible Bangles song (Show?)
Measles and Commuter Trains - Worst Christmas song ever (ACS)
White Guys Be Ownin' Everything - Adam's next hit (ACS)
Blood On The Grout - John Cougar Mellencamp song (ACS)
No Blood In The Peckeroo - Good John Cougar song (ACS)
Mellen's Gold - A three disc box set of nothing but John Cougar Mellencamp hits (ACS)
Freaks, Retards and Jews - Not a Cher song (ACS)
Pedophile Cops - Good Cheap Trick song (ACS)
Pig Anus Soup - Favorite Rolling Stones album (Bryan) (ACS)
That Dog Don’t Mess With Olga and Natalia Don’t Spit No Mo’ - Sounds like a Mississippi Delta blues song (Bryan) (ACS)
Goggles Are For Pussies - Trace Adkins' number one hit (ACAFBSL)
Whistle While You Masturbate - The lost Disney song aka "Whistle While You Jerk" (ACS)
12 Pack & Dick's Hard - Name of Adam's new album (Gina) (ACS)
Blood and Soil - A good Smithereens song (ACS)
Pina Colada in Amsterdam - Worst Jimmy Buffet song ever (ACS)
Tough Times In The City - Great Nick Gilder song (ACS)
I've Got A Hamster In My Scrotum And He's Looking For His Keys - That's a good country song (ACS)
Gay Hitler -Great Elvis Costello song (ACS)
Tard On The Tool Shed - Good Mellenamp song (AOTH)
Condo in Redondo - Sublime song (ADS)
Animoji - Band that sung "Obsession" (ACS)
People Who Have Lost People - Worst Barbara Streisand song ever (ACS)
Tilted Heart - Great Tammy Wynette song (ADS)
Yoga wood - Great Beatles song (ACS)
Anal cleft - Song from the Sound of Music (ACS)
Morgue Mode - Sounds like a guy from Iceland who is a DJ (ACS)
I’ve got a Saturday and two friends - great country song (Gina) (ACS)
Recipe for Misery (2) - Title of the next Guns N Roses album (ACS)
Circling Back To Baldwin - Good name for a country song (ACS)
Keistered in Winnipeg - (Bald’s) favorite Willie Nelson song (ACS)
Anal ipecac - Good indie band (ACS)
2 Tits and a Pulse - Ace likes that Beck song (Bryan/Adam) (ACS)

Football Players/Athletes/Teams:

Legs Akimbo - Wide Receiver (ACS)
Feral Katz - Nose Tackle (ACS)
L' Brarian Booker - Wide Receiver (ACS)
Oscar Buzz - Linebacker (ACS)
DeVigorous Lover - Wide Receiver (ACS)
Nadir Zenith - Placekicker (ACS)
DeGluten Free - Offensive Lineman (ACS)
Tangy Mango - Fullback (ACS)
N'Farious Plan - (position?) (ACS)
Modular Holmes - (position?) (ACS)
Fortuitous Bounce - Safety (ACS)
Operatin' Thetan - (ACS) Quarterback for the Washington Redskins (ACS)
Minority Banks - HOF OLB who died tragically in a car wreck shortly after his HOF induction, a natural athlete, he played option QB in college along with being a stand out member of the track team, and in high school he was captain of the basketball team. Survived by his twin brother Majority Banks, who also played in the league, and daughter Recuser Banks who many believe was the best athlete in the family (ACS)
Coach Platitude - "Take a knee son...helmet's not a chair" (ACS)
Glendora Bevmo - Mother of DeVigorous Lover and L' Brarian Booker (different fathers, of course) (ACS)
Marshall Law - (Allison) (ACS)
Orlando Ceeworld - (position?) (ACS)
Du Vatine - (position?) (Show?)
Raja Slate - Super fast wide-out out of Marshall via LSU (AOTH)
Moe Greene - Great corner for the Washington Redskins in the 80’s (ACS)
Bronx Defenders - Sounds like a AAA hockey team (RD)
Medical Error - Slipped in the draft due to a video being released just prior (ACS)
Homeo Stasis (position?) (ACS)
Capybara - The greatest name for a major league skipper (ACS)
Ejaxico Johnson (position?) (ACS)
Radiant Barrier vs. Attic Fan - The worst WWE matchup ever to grace the stage (AOTH)
Bamboo Brick - one of the greatest mixed martial artists on the planet (AOTH)
Dexter Methorphan - He did not participate in the combines, but his coaches say he can run a 4.3 (Twitter)
Bob Jacuzzi - Great point guard for the Celtics aka "THE COOZE" (ACS)
Shame Negation - Picked to leave Clemson early and go very early in the draft this year. (ADS)
Entertainment Crackers - Another name for the Washington Generals ACS
Hardibacker - Good name for an inside backer (ACS)
Osmosis - Black dude. Forward for the Knicks who might or might not have been traded (ADS)
Onus Wilson - NFL draftee (ACS)
World Be Mine - Adam’s new basketball name (ACS)
LBJ - Worst Mexican wrestler name ever (ADS)
Cold stone Steve Austin - Can’t wrestle on hot days. Tag team partners with the Klondike twins (GS)
Cicely Tyson - Greatest Italian boxer of all time. (ADS)

Porn Star Names/Terms/Gay Code:

Spoodini - (LL)
Rocky Stucco - (AOTH)
No Can Doo - Backdoor anal queen of China (ACS)
Kristallnacht - Worst porn star name in the business (ACS)
Madison Avenue (I am Rappaport Podcast)
Hero Du Jour (I am Rappaport Podcast)
Kindle Fire (ACS)
Jackson Hole - Gay porn actor (ACS)
Col. Duke Lacrosse - Adam's porn name (LL)
Duke Circumference - Adam's gay porn name (ACS)
Rich Data - Gay porn actor (Show?)
Tom Foolery - Gay porn actor (Show?)
Honey Dijon - Great porn star name (Show?)
Aids Machete - One of Adam's gay porn names. "Very short stint, I only did 2 weeks with that name, so it was like 41 movies." (ACS)
Bryce Canyon - Great gay porn name (ACS)
The Italian Coastguard - A gay move. "Let me just start with basic anal, then I'll slide into the Italian Coast Guard." (ACS)
Tetanus Gym - Good gay porn name "Who you working with?" "Tetanus Gym." "Oh boy, make sure you're on top" (ACS)
Shared A Back Fence - gay slang (ACS)
Mea Culpa - Adam's porn name (ACS)
Hand Twins - Gay code (ACS)
Backscatter - Porn technology (PM)
Cajun Tree Climber - Gay code (AOTH)
Snow Blower- Gay code (AOTH)
Stump Grinder - Gay code (AOTH)
Tumbler And Coaster - Adam's gay slang replacement for "top and bottom" (PM)
Go For A Bike Ride - Gay code (ACS)
Artie Fartie - Adam's porn name from the 80's (ACS)
Road Island Ray - Ray's porn name (AOTH)
38KKK -A type of porn that comes out of Kentucky (ACS)
Tech Screw - A dirty website for geeks (ACS)
Bearvalanche - Worst gay move ever (ACS)
Wacked Off Pieces Of Cactus - Gay code for gay rough trade (ACS)
Brad Nail - Good gay porn name (ADS)
Lightning Rod - Good gay porn name for Milo Yiannopplous (ADS)
Milk Barn - Another name for Adam's bathroom sink (ACS)
Meat Thievery - That's just good gay code (ACS)
Hairy Shin - Adam's gay porn name (ACS)
Asian Persuasion - Sounds like a good name for a porn series Asian persuasion 16 (ACS)
Cock Holster - Good movie series, cock holster 14 (ACS)
Celebrity Du Jour - Great porn name (ACS)
Europol - Another great porn name (ACS)
Roy Wood - Adam's gay porn name (ACS)
Tank slapper - Gay slang (Gina) (ACS)
Porch Pirate - Gay term (ACS)
Mad Chuck - The world's worst name for a gay porn star (AOTH)
Sweat lodge - Gay code (ACS)
The L.A. Underground - Sounds like a gay bar (M&J)
Skin and grin - Gay slang (ACS)
Rear Admiral - The name of one of the best bars on west side (ACS)
Loaded for bear - Now a gay term (GS)
Fruit Of The Year - A porn Dave (Dameshek) starred in (ACS)
The Lebanese Comedian - Ace's favorite sex position (ACS)
Cockout - When a gay guy doesn't try very hard (ACS)
Margana Wood - Porn name (ACS)
Hugh Bris - Porn star (RD)
Matte Clear - Fondalier’s gay porn name (AOTH)
Palatial Estates – A good 80’s fake tittie porn name (AOTH)
Cokie Roberts - Great porn name (ACS)
Armenian Christmas - An unspeakable sexual act in prison. "Johnny ratted out the white supremacists to the warden, so they gave him an Armenian Christmas" (Show?)
Ride The Pine - Gay slang (ADS)
Meet Gaze - Gay slang (ACS)
Asshole Rider - Gay slang (ACS)
Cash Widedick - Ace's porn name if you can call an apple a honey crisp. (ACS)
Shanda Lear - Great stripper name (Gina) (ACS)
Fiery Cherry - Good porn name (ACS)
Jerk the wheel - Code for masturbation (ACS)
Giddyup Titties - Gina’s porn name (Gina) (ACS)
French astronaut - Great gay slang (ACS)
Mr Bandera - gay code (ACS)
Beefmato/Clamato - sounds like names of venerial diseases (ACS)
Spanner - Australian gay code (ACS)
Rocky tenure - Adam’s gay porn name (ACS)
The End Game - One of Stormy Daniels movie titles (RD)
Room for cream - Great porno title (Gina) (ACS)
Pedialyte shower - Worst sexual act ever (Sklar) (ACS)
Foot Zunki - Add-on to the Pedialyte shower (ACS)
Self rimming sink - gay slang (AOTH)
Harvey Mudd - gay bar drink where vermouth and bartender shit is mixed in a goblet (ACS)
Barney’s Beanery - ultimate name for a gay bar (ACS)
Parallel park both ways - euphemism for being bi (GS)
The Big Three - Gerago’s junk (RD)
73 - When a fat guy tries to 69 with a chubby prostitute he met at a ham radio convention(ACS)
Backlog - Stormy Daniels movie title (Bryan)(ACS)
Madison Bear - Sounds like an dating app for gay hairy dudes who are married (ACS)
Back pay - Good porn title name (ACS)

Miscellaneous People

Trajectory Hagar - High school kid "heading down the wrong path" in life (ACS)
Slick Mouth - Adam's prison name (ACS)
Rich Carless - Cool homeless guy name (ACS)
Keyless Chuck - Best homeless guy name (ACS)
Nasal Ranger - Worst superhero name ever (Gina) (ACS)
Krav Maga (2) - Good name for a sheriff (ADS)
Hubcap Annie - Horror that hangs out with Keyless Chuck (ACS)
Becky Honkington (Allison) (ACS)
Monica Chugscock - (Pronounced "Shuggscawk") (ADS)
Tyvek DuPont - Best rich guy’s name (AOTH)
Mattress - A Model/actress (ACS)
Hofmeister Kink - Nazi war criminal who's been in hiding in Brazil for the past 61 years. aka Jake Johnson (ACS)
Serpiginous - The world's wimpiest swordsman. Sir Piginous of Wussville (LL)
Chick Fil a - Great play-by-play guy for the Warriors from the 70’s (Show?)
Peri Menopausal - Best P.I. working the Chicago beat (LL)
Whiskey Dick - The neighborhood pedophile in the clown outfit (ACS)
Surge - Guy that drives for ÜBER (ACS)
Babbling Brook - Great name for a female cattle auctioneer (PM)
Terra Firma - Name of the "woman of color" that heckled Adam at a Ventura live show and was removed by force (The Ranker Podcast)
Octomom - Great Batman villain (Bryan) (ACS)
Larry The Cabinet Guy - Failed Israeli comic…"Don't get 'er done!" (ACS)
Rod Blagojevich - Joe Francis' slimy brother who sells above ground pools out of a primered van (ACS)
Cockchug Man - The gay superhero in The Village People that wears just all leather (ACS)
MEL-ROL- She's one of The Spice Girls (AOTH)
Hand Farts - A new comedian Adam had never heard of (ACS)
Juan Jeremy - The greatest international film star ever (ACS)
Bitchathane Jackson - Good name for a "sista" (ACS)
Tobar - Perfect caveman name (ACS)
Vroman - A fast moving Roman (ACS)
Korn Syrup and Fructose - Women of color who work at the strip club with Jade (stage 4) (ACS)
Fred Meyer - Lucy's neighbor (ACS)
Kimchi - The Asian flutist (ACS)
Pacoima - The mechanic from Taxi (ACS)
Dick Salt - NATO Alliance General (ACS)
Dick Salt (2) - Manger of the Mariners in the early 70’s (Bryan) (ACS)
Caramel And Fudge - Two more African-American prostitutes that lived in the apartment above Adam’s (ACS)
Peaches - The whore that lived upstairs (ACS)
F. Me Bailey - Greatest lawyer of all time (RD)
Agua Caliente - Loves that guy. He does a great John Madden (ACS)
Senior Penis - One the most dangerous drug lords to ever work (ADS)
Shill Du'Jour - Good Bond secretary name (RD)
Brexit Romero - Sounds like an International assassin (ACS)
Lugansk - That gay diver who hit his head and gave the whole Canadian team AIDS (ACS)
Leak O'rama - A Dutch action star, starred in “Sudden Death” (AOTH)
Vaginismus - Great black guy name (ADS)
Normcore - Guy that owns Westwood one (ACS)
LaTolstoy - Great black guy name (ACS)
Shapiro – Artist who is really good at anime. Died in the 60’s but was a real trendsetter (ACS)
Chuck Spears – Good name for a racist. “Hey you workin’ with Chuck Spears over at the Klan?” (ACS)
Norethindrone - DAG’s Sister (CLL)
La Tuskegee - Black airline pilot (ACS)
C-clamps – Nickname for Adam’s step-mom. “Ol’ C-clamps locked me out of the house again.” (ACS)
Harry Nilsson - (Gary thinks) he does the voices on The Simpsons (ADS)
Nutella - Great name for a crazy black woman (ACS)
Sia - The perfect person to break up with. Would be perfect if she was dating Jack (hit the road Jack) (ACS)
The Ball Catcher - What Adam used to call Ray's ass in junior high (ACFBSL)
MOAB - Matt's new nickname (Mother of All Buttholes) (AONTH)
Trip Reeb - Great name for a white guy (ACS)
Merle Horn - One of the greatest best ropers to ever come down the Pecos (ACS)
The Boring Machine - Lynette's name for Adam (ACS)
Avocado Hand - The nickname of Eric Clapton's brother (Chet) who works at a Mexican place and is charge of the guacamole (ACS)
Bagel Hand - Clapton's Jewish cousin (ACS)
Fa-Sheeya (fascia) - A heavy set woman of color that works at the DMV (ACAFBSL)
Ghrelin - New AM/PM mascot (ACS)
Krav Maga (3) - An Israeli Captain from 1946 (ACS)
Cuban Boa - Sounds like a dark skinned trannie (ACS)
Gabardine - She's a very chatty woman of color middle-aged and she'll talk your ear off. (ACS)
Guy Dudebro - Greatest name ever (AOTH)
Otto Warmbier- Simultaneously the greatest and worst beer master brewer name ever (ACS)
Leif Geragos - Greatest rocking attorney ever Viking rocker attorney (ACS)
Ernest J. Bigot - "I'm just asking....I'm just wanna know...." (ACS)
Panzanella - Cobra's full name (ACS)
Sheet Metal Nibbler - Great name for Matt the porcelain punisher (AOTH)
Big Grenadine - Sounds like a large black neighbor (ACS)
Silent gym - Next to Keyless Chuck, best homeless guy name ever (ACS)
Nuchilla - Sounds like a black vampire (Theo Von) (ACS)
D' poleon - Black Napoleon (ACS)
Luke Rockhold - Sounds like a character on The Flintstones (GS)
Sissy squat - She was hot (AOTH)
Beulah - The town horror (RD)
Ronan Farrow - One of the best wheel men in Europe (ACS)
Duke Bagg - Comedian Ian Bagg's brother (ACS)
Root Ball Grinder - A horrible term for a bitchy wife (Ruth Ballgrinder and Harriet Mulcher) (Tim Allen) (ACS)
Paul Funyun - Just a big dude who likes to have fun. Has a pink ox as a sidekick (ACS)
Page/Savage - A great lawyer team (Adam Ray) (ACS)
Ivar the Boneless - Ace’s dad’s nickname in high school. aka Jim the spineless (ACS)
Bash Worthy - Comic strip's character name/title (ACS)
Uncle Tom-bién - Mexican Uncle Tom (ACS)
Alist Poon - An Indian exchange student who has cerebral palsy (ACS)
Indignant Asswipes - Good name for an improv troupe (Gina) (ACS)
Flora in Fauna - two black chicks that work for him (ADS)
Cheap - Name of a he/she that literally went under sexual assignment surgery last month (ACS)
Heroin (1)(Pronounced Ehr-o-win by JCVD) A character in Lord Of The Rings (Bryan) (ACS)
Yersinia pestis - Ace did Celebrity Apprentice with that dude. He won that year (ADS)
Morgue Mode - Sounds like a guy from Iceland who is a DJ (ACS)
Rachel Bias - Great stripper name (ACS)
Buzz Ramjet - Aviation attorney (ACS)
Black Cherry - Stripper name Bryan (ACS)
Saffron - Sassy black woman in Meg Whitman movie (ACS)
Vibranium - a new black kid name from Black Panther (ACS)
Bird Nerd - Marvel superhero (ACS)
Merch Galore - Worst Bond secretary ever. Total sellout. Always wearing her own swag (GS)
Bathroom Goalie - New code for fat chicks sitting next to you on an airplane (ACS)
Skip Loader -Kurt Loder’s older brother (ACS)
F. Me Money - greatest attorney rapper ever (RD)

Morning Zoos/DJ's/Radio Stations

Gum and Condoms - (Show?)
Dusty Labia - Adam's handle when he used to do AM Mornings. (ACS)
Asscrack and Backsack in the morning with Sludge (LL)
Crockpots and Headphones (ACS)
Booger and Floor Wax (ACS)
Almonds and Water (ACS)
Cold Butter And Calves (ADS)
Schluter And The Drain - Schluter has a thick Austrian accent , while "The Drain" has a super low voice (AOTH)
Ace Rockolla - Just Google "Ace Rockolla Lightning round...." (LL)
Fungus and Mold (Show?)
Stupid and Petty (Show?)
Eunice and Edgar - Bubba the Love Sponge's parents (ACS)
Flip Flops and Fanny Packs (ACS)
Hairy Shin - Does a KCRE show in the weekends (ACS)
Deep Bra Grooves - Should be a Sirius XM station Channel 248, C+ and above! (ACS)
Andy and Opie - Great Radio Show (ACS)
QuietRock - Sounds like an easy listening rock station (AOTH)
Quiet Crush - A good easy listening radio station (ACS)
The Tool Box - SiriusXM took tune station aka KTOL (ACS)
Ray's Enema Antics - New podcast on Carolla Digital (Bryan)(ACS)
Doug Gets Blown While He Eats Pudding - Doug Benson's next podcast (ACS)
Cat Packer - Used to do mornings with her brother, Fudge (ACS)
Duke and Shinola - good morning show team (ACS)
Mother Trucker - Adam’s Podcast with caller Miguel (AOTH)

Places

Boobville - (LL)
Pedoph Isle aka Pedophile Island - Island where are all the pedophiles are sent to live. (Also a TV show/movie idea) (LL)
Lil' Lord Fauntleroy’s Academy for Albino Hemophiliacs - Drew's childhood school (LL)
Doesntexistizcan - Where presidential candidate Platitude's grandfather was from (ACS)
Boga Raton - The world's worst resort spot (Show?)
Meat Yard - Great name for a gay bar (ACS)
Mister Fister's - Adam's all-time top name for a gay bar (ACS)
Sub-Par - Worst name for a submarine sandwich shop (Show?)
Queen Mary - Great name for a tranny bar (ACS)
NuvaRing - A German racetrack. "The new Nissan GTR turned it in 7:21, faster than the Corvette." (Show?)
Louis Pasteur Middle School (ACS)
Helm’s Deep - World's first gay bar bakery (ACS)
Kal Penn - One of the best sounding names to get an engineering degree from (ACS)
Alaska State Motto - Love fishing but I hate your kids? Alaska! (PM)
Duke University - John Wayne's college (ACS)
Planned Possumhood - Planned Parenthood in Arkansas (ACS)
Fruit Stand - Great name for a gay bar (ACS)
Poo Poo City - Where Charles Fletcher Loomis' house is located (ACS)
Blood Bank - Great name for a check cashing place in the hood (ACS)
Bass Manor - Great name for a gay bar (ACS)
The Dead C - Sounds like the worst name for a lesbian bar ever (ACS)
Wood Bar - Good name for a gay bar (ACS)
Ghost Load - Ride at Calico Ghost Town (ADS)
Nasacort - Country club for Jewish folks where they play tennis at (ADS)
L.A. HOTT (1) - An 80's bar with an outdoor door seating area (ACS)
Fairy Wings - Good name for a bar on the west side (ACS)
Second Hand/First World - Store that sells rich whitey’s high end stuff (ACS)
The Lance Hunter - Perfect name for a gay bar (Dumb People Town)
Pervert Park - Theo Vaughn grew up there (ACS)
Big Sur - Great name for a big and tall shop (Show?)
Studio Centric - Sounds like a Utopia. Between Valley Village and Sherman Oaks (AOTH)
Asstard - Thor came from that planet (ACS)
Grand Entrance - Great name for a gay bar (AOTH)
Thermopolis - Where the Bun Boy is (ACS)
The Turkish Embassy - Gay bar (ACS)
Low Tide - Gay code for boner in the rear view mirror (ACS)
Corumption - On the way to Vegas, where Heidi Fleiss lives with her macaws (ACS)
C.C. Fichens - Sounds like a pretzel stand (Gina) (ACS)
Timpani Barn - where to get timpani to go, has three big Mexicans in the kitchen (ACS)
Heroin (2)(Pronounced Ehr-o-win by JCVD) The health food store in Venice (ACS)
Pocket Passers - Next to Mister Fister’s (Gina) (ACS)
The Mexican Faire - Worst fair ever (ACS)
Hanoi Hospice - Only place worse than the Hanoi Hilton (ACS)
Kaleblazer- Gay juice bar (ACS)
Hot Dog Cannon - good name for a bar next to The Abbey (ACS)
Dyskeratosis - where Vinnie lives, lots of Greek folks, a family oriented community (ACS)
Kind of, Italy - Where Ace’s family is from. Where he gets his kinky hair. (ADS)

Miscellaneous

Cleaning The Pink Turtle - Bryan's name for pleasuring oneself (ACS)
Analingus - A new type of breath mint (LL)
The Milk Of Arthritic Goats - A rabbi's curse: "May you suckle at the teet of the milk of arthritic goat!!!" (ACS)
Carbon Dating - A black dating website (ACS)
RU486 - Vanity plate for a guy who runs an abortion clinic (ADS)
Jet Green - Amsterdam's Airlines (ACS)
Stromer, Oldhafer and Carolla - World's worst law firm (AOTH)
Ira Carolla - Sounds like an affliction "Oh my Ira Carolla's acting up" (ACS)
Sawjay - Sounds French...gay word for sausage. "I was strokin' this dude’s sawjay" (ACS)
Smokeless Cigarette - Name for Dr. Drew's honker after his prostate surgery (ADS)
El Niño - Name of "Sinn" strip club DJ's cock (ACS)
Blue Man - Crazy hairdresser's macaw who doesn't judge (PM)
Lucia - An Italian moped (ACS)
American Jewish World Service - A van that's begging to be shot at (ACS)
E-aye? - Canadian version of EBay (ACS)
Sweatpants Lesbian - What Adam would be. An in-between lesbian. Not a lipstick lesbian, not a butch dyke (ACS)
SuckStrong - Bill Clinton's bracelet (ACS)
Gaybus - Gay and bogus (ACS)
Flappy Bird - The most offensive name for the vagina (ACS)
G8 (Summit) - The Pontiac that Oprah gave away on her show (ACS)
Oracle A The Delphi - Big new startup company (ADS)
Crewkakke - A type of sweater (ACS)
The Flying Dutchman - Great name for an Amsterdam airlines (ACS)
Cleaning My Chain - Euphemism for beating off (ACS)
Awesome Town - A gathering of three or more polar bears (ACS)
Avocado - The Greek word for nut sack (ACS)
Doucherette - A gum/patch that douchebags chew/use (ACS)
Urban Milling -Black guys standing around (AOTH)
Synesthesia - When you eat your own hair (ACS)
Tuck Rule - When a guy pretends he's a chick and stands in front of the mirror (ACS)
My #2 Pencil Is Out Of Lead - Another term for erectile dysfunction (ACS)
Float A Bond - When a politician farts (RD)
Vaginismus - black people's holiday, accompanied with a lot of ceremonial garb (ADS)
Vaseline and Gauze - Elizabeth Taylor's new scent (ACS)
Jewber - A drunk on a 10-speed (ACS)
Chickpea - What Gina does when we camp (ACS)
Oscar Squad (2) - Bad gay code (ACS)
Airbus - Worst name for an aircraft. Sounds like “air donkey” (AOTH)
Shailene Woodley - Sounds like the most fantastical verb/adverb combo. “I want to Shailene Woodley through a field of poppies with you” (Gina) (Twitter)
Asshole Rider (2) - Worst piece of exercise equipment Vinnie’s ever endorsed (ACS)
Diario La Prensa - Stealer of the jersey in Spanish (ACS)
The Sicilian Fly Swatter - Sounds like a WWF move (Gina) (ACS)
Jellyfish - Sounds like something your grandpa would buy for you at the mall (ACS)
Fruit Fly - More politically correct term for fag hag (Show?)
Jewgling - When a Jew "Googles" their symptoms (ACS)
Tavares - David Wild's boner medicine (ACS)
Jew -Over - A mulligan from a barmitzva. "Uh, I misread that...can I get a Jew-over?" (ACS)
Ossified - That's a Don King word, there (ACS)
Zero for Cecil - Worst charity ever (Bald Bryan) (ACS)
A++ - A bra that Gina will never see (ACS)
Joycelyn - A good name for Curly from the Three Stooges to say (ACS)
Phallisee - Latin for "to see the penis" (ADS)
Coffee Nap - Euphemism for pooping in your pants (ACS)
USS Monitor - Doesn't sound like a ship of war, sounds like a night nurse (ACS)
Dotard - A skirt a man wears (ACS)
Wilding- Something derogatory that takes place in public pools in certain counties (ACS)
Caveat - Latin for shitting on Adam's point (ADS)
Festiva - Sounds like a boner medicine (ACS)
Depeche Mode - French for “who dealt it?” (ADS)
Beefy Clutch – The purse Gina thought Lady Gaga took to the Emmy’s (ACS)
Sig Sauer - Something you would yell at Oktoberfest before downing a stiff stein of stout (ACS)
Jeans day – Sounds like the special day for your special need son Gene, to raise money (ACS)
Wilding - What takes place in public pools in certain counties (GS)
4F - Can’t/won’t be eligible for the draft (ACS)
Groupie - a kind of fish (ACS)
The African chick - Horrible name for a boat (ACS)
Inclusion rider - Snowboard for retarded kids (ACS)
The Urethra - Bad name for a car (ACS)
Mercury retrograde - when you take your index finger and shove it under your sack before you blow, and you belch it up later (ACS)
UEFA - Transsexuals playing soccer with a balled up maxi pad (GS)
Missed Connections- The worst airline ever (ACS)
Carollo - Sounds like a Tool you’d use rarely (ACS)
Brembo - that Mexican food company that makes that bread (Matt) (ACS)
Preemptive gay strike - Worst video game ever (ADS)
Futon - Chinese for bear trap (ACS)
Sexual Battery - Batteries especially made for sexual devices. Somewhere between AA and C (ACS)

Food/Drinks

Deer Bits - A venison cereal. Made of frosted deer flakes (Show?)
Coco Chanel - Nestlé’s newest coffee flavor (ACS)
Honey Dicks - Best cereal name ever (ACS)
Dawson's Beard - A pudding flavor Ace saw at Whole Foods (ACS)
Mighty Mutts - Worst breakfast cereal ever (ADS)
Chillax - A cinnamon based drink from "Hector's" country (ACS)
Black Dick - An English desert (ACS)
Tardy Digression - Sounds like a finger food..."would you like another tardy digression?" "No, I'm saving room for the main meal" (IFYWABC)
Double Bird Strike - Mixed drink created by Ace and Teresa. Made with Grey Goose, Wild Turkey, a splash of Canadian Club, and a splash of Hudson River water (ACS)
GAYtorade - A sports drink for gay people, because they lose essential body fluids (ACS)
University of Illinois At Urbana Champaign - Sounds like a carbonated drink for black people (ACS)
Flinch Fuck - Part of a nutritious breakfast, and a healthy relationship (ADS)
Phantom Punch - Something Bill Cosby gave his lady friends (ACS)
Pansy Sauce - Goes good with some shrimp (ADS)
Tilted Pillar - Kick ass IPA (AOTH)
Shaver - A good name for a miniature pastrami sandwich (Cousin Sal Show)
GPA - Something they add to children's cereal (ACS)
Stellwell's - A new low fat snack cracker (ACS)
Conchata Ferrell - A great cheese/unwanted cat (ACS)
Poopwell's - One of the worst snacks Nabisco has ever put their name on (ACS)
Belldini – Latest Taco Bell offering (ACS)
Fuzzy Zoeller – Zima with a jigger of peach schnapps (ACS)
Millennial Malaise - A sweet honey dipping sauce (ADS)
Jelani Cobb - Sounds like an Indian dish (Gina) (ACS)
Air Doodle - The very worst Super Bowl snack on the planet (ACS)
Faygala - Jewish sports drink (ACS)
Stroke Cane - Sounds like some sugary treat, mixed with a reach around (ACS)
The Silence Breakers (2) - good name for a mint (ACS)
Lesbian Squirt - Sponsor of the Dinah Shore Classic (ACS)
Son of Goose - Worst vodka ever. Comes in a plastic squeeze bottle (ACS)
Orange Hitler - Worst Hi-C flavor ever (ACS)

TV Shows/Movies

Cunt du' Jour - A great Bond villain name (ACS)
Coffee and Donuts - (Charlie Coffee III and Johnny Donetti) Johnny's a tough street wise cop whose jive talking and plays by his own rules and Charlie's super uptight (LL)
Pedoph Isle (aka) Pedophile Island - All pedophiles are sent to live on an isolated island, and a 747 full of Boy Scouts crash lands there and they have to fight to survive (Also a place) (ACS)
Anus and Eyeball - Buddy cop TV show duo (ACS)
Pussy Pioneer - John Candy's last movie (ACS)
Red Velvet - Made up movie character Clown played by Paul Giamatti. "Was secret service, and someone died on his watch. Now he's takin to clownin'." Wears a red velvet clown outfit. (ACS)
Destination Of The Semen - (Adam Ray) A movie Harrison Ford passed on twice (ACS)
Gay Eye - Movie where Adam plays Buddy McKlan, a racist homophobic mechanic who is blinded in a freak hot transmission fluid accident. He gets the donor eyes from a gay guy who perished on a moped accident in Antigua. Co-starring Larry the Cable Guy as his best friend. (Co-written by Bryan Cranston) (ACS)
Grinders - Sitcom where Jon Gruden moves in with Johnny Manziel (ACS)
Squishy Red River - Movie that started John Wayne (Show?)
Gusset And Cable - Perfect Cop buddy duo team (AOTH)
Just One Of The Gays - Stars Shia LaBeouf (ACS)
Hard Impact - Sounds like a Van Damme movie from the 90's (ACS)
Hammer Pants And Ice - Worst cop detective duo from the 80's (ACS)
Living With The Kilowatts - Adam's new animated series where they just leave toaster ovens on all day (ACS)
Keep Calm And Rape A Lot - Worst Monty Python film ever (ACS)
Medical Mishaps - New show Dave Coulier and Tawny Kitaen could host (ACS)
Roaming With Bison - Another great Bill Murray movie (ACS)
Gainesville Florida Financial Planner - Sounds like a Saturday Night Live skit (ACS)
Blame the Bee Gees - Adam's next documentary (ACS)
Adam Knees Your Dad In The Nuts - Adam's new game show (ACS)
Navigeddon - Terrorists take over all of the GPS systems of cars, and send them careening into the Grand Canyon (ACS)
Rings Of Honor - Terrorists take over Olympic training facility in Colorado Springs, and the athletes have to use their individual skills to escape. (Cameo by Randy Couture as the salty old coach) (ACS)
Endless Time/Ample Time For Backup - Adam's new Netflix series (ACS)
Tarred n' Feathered - Buddy flick starring a retarded guy and an Indian chief (Show?)
Mr. Will Doo And Can Doo - PSA Motivational cartoon bathroom characters Will Doo (Played by Will Arnette) and Can Doo is shaped like a toilet. Filmed in kitschy Clutch Cargo style animation (ADS)
Robot Lawyer - Great Phil Hartman bit (ACS)
Umpire News Network - Adam's channel with umpires reporting. Unbiased reporting (ACS)
Sofa Tard - New CW show coming soon (Matt) (AOTH)
Junior Fantasy Island - Show where kids of reckless parents are shipped off to live with Bill Cosby and Felicia Rashad (ADS)
2 And A Half Denali's - Hasn't been same since Sheen left (ACS)
So Kanye - Sitcom from the 90's (ACS)
Ridicuopothy - Sounds like a Mike Judge movie (ADS)
Master Buck - One of John Candy's most controversial movies (ACS)
LA HOTT (1) - An 80’s bar with an outdoor door seating area (ACS)
Mother Hitler - Coming to TNT. Starring Patrick Swayze's bother, Don (ACS)
Sink and Bounce - Movie about roller boogie from the 80's, starred Lil' Bow Wow (ACS)
The Debs - A made up CW network show where you just put all the hot chicks in Hollywood (ACS)
The Origin Story Of AIDS - Worst Marvel movie ever (Bryan)(ACS)
Everybody Hates Vinnie - Horrible sitcom (ACS)
Chick Clan - Good movie title (ACS)
Condo in Redondo - Best movie I ever did (ADS)
Red Lobsteria - New show Dr. Drew was talking about where African Americans form their own country (ACS)
Earthquake rehab - Reality show Dr. drew seismic expert and a civil engineer come together (Rainn Wilson) (ACS)
Rooster Jones - Great John Wayne movie. Super Fly meets True Grit (ACS)
Ernest Bigot goes to..... (ACS)
Nickels On The Job - First and only Jewish gum shoe on the job. ABC, Friday nights, 10:00 p.m. (ADS)
Solicitor General - Great Danny Kaye movie (RD)
Disjointed - Lorena Bobbitt biopic (ADS)
Habib and Company - Horrible children's show (MS)
Bobby's Room - Howie Mandel animated project from the 90's (ACS)
Page/Savage - Great cop duo show from the ‘80’s (Adam Ray) (ACS)
Paper Asshole - Great Tatum O’Neal film (ACS)
L.A. HOTT (2) - Failed Steven Bochco series pilot (ACS)
Pieces Of String Too Small To Use - Lena Dunham film from the late 90’s (ACS)
Oscar Squad - New Marvel Movie (Gina) (ACS)
Cortron/Melamine - Transformers (Gina) (ACS)
Anoscope - Worst way to see a movie (ADS)
Practical Rapist - New SNL character (Gina) (ACS)
Superfoot - Worst Marvel movie ever (Bryan) (ACS)
Celebrity Food Chain - Would be a great show (Jeff Cesario) (ACS)
Backsack and Anus - Worst cop duo ever (RS)
Korean moyle - ABC’s next sitcom (Jeff) ACS
Nanny Huntin ‘with Ted Nugent - Great reality show I’d watch (ACS)
Progressive pope - New sitcom (Gina) ACS
Nick Mancuso: Construction Fluffer - New TV Show (AONT)
Rush Blitzer - Adam’s character from his movie, “Snapper” (BSR)
The Baldwin’s and Beyond -Great reality show (RD)
The Rogue Deuce - The next Star Wars movie (ADS)
Mr. Goodbar To The Rescue - Ace loves that movie (ACS)
Wrestling Squatters - New show on YouTube Red starring Eric Stromer (AOTH)

Books/Coffee Table Books

Dade County Black Prom, 1985 (ACS)
Here Are The Pajamas We Picture You In (ACS)
Three Shitty Homes, One Washing Machine, Zero Dryers - Title of Adam's new book (Ray) (AOTH)
Chapstick And Batteries - Title of Adam's next bestselling book (ACS)
Who The Fuck Put Their Sombrero on My Keys? – Title of Adam’s next book (ACS)
Cunt With A Grunt - Adam's favorite Dr. Seuss book (PM)
You'll Never See A Cockroach Jog (PM)
Kemo Skinny Calves - Adam's new children's book (ADS)
You're Dyslexic And I'm Dumb - Adam and John Popper's collaborative next book (ACS)
I Get It If You’re GWAR - Adam's next book (ACS)
Bulk Magazine - Costco magazine that Jimmy Kimmell graced the cover of twice (ACS)
Do You Have To Take Your Top Off To Dye Your Pubes, Drew? (LL)
Glamping With Moriah - Adam's new book (ACS)
From The Mouths of Babes (Hot Chicks Not Babies) (ACS)
(The) Sweet Spot - Adam's next book (Bryan) (ACS)
I Thought Things Would Be Better When I Was Rich (ACS)
Radio Station Kitchen (ACS)
Post-it Notes In Radio Station Kitchens (ACS)
Comedy Club Green Rooms And The Sofas That Were Not Made For Them (ACS)
Jethro, the Mexican Jew - A great children's book (Gina) (ACS)
Professor and the Construction Worker -The worst children's book ever (ACS)
Willie and the Weed - Good name for a children's book (ACS)
What Black People Think White People Complain About (ACS)
Everyone Eventually Becomes The Man (ACS)
Recipe for Misery (1) - Name Of Adam’s next book (ACS)
In Defense Of Black Face - Adam’s next book (ACS)
Hurry Up And Make Sense (2) - Biography title of the Talking Heads (ACS)

Native American Names

Chief Thunderbear (LL)
Dances With Cocks (ACS)
Dances With Lipstick (ACS)
Ol' Urethra Windows (ACS)
Oxnard - Indian name meaning the balls of a bull (ACS)

V/P Names

Absorbent Rag - Good name for T's V (ACS)
Hurt Locker - Another name for T's V (ACS)
Judge's Mansion - Another name for T's G
Cmarket.com - Another name for T's V (ACS)
City of Industry - Another name for T's V (ACS)
Dutch Mook - Another name for T's V (ACS)s V
No Safe Spaces - Great name for T's V (ACS)
Hobo Stove - Another name for A's V (ACS)
Sausage Grinder - Another name for A's V (ACS)
Dixville Notch - Another name for G's V (ACS)
Snake River Canyon - Another name for G's V (ACS)
Dakota Access Pipeline - Another name for G's V (ACS)
The Holidome - Another name for G’s V (ACS)
Discovery Bay - Great name for G's V (ACS)
B.O. Box - Great name for G's V (ACS)
Sea bag - Good name for G's V (ACS)
El Portal - Great name for G's V (ACS)
Harry Belafonte - Adam's name for his junk, if he were a woman (Show?)
Top Gear - Another name for Adam’s junk (ACS)
El Gordo/King Taco - Good name for G’s V (ACS)
Port of Karachi - Good name for G’s V (ACS)
submitted by Texas1971 to AdamCarolla [link] [comments]


2018.07.01 15:40 Texas1971 Carollaisms (July)

Carollaisms (July)

Band Names/Rap Stars

Mitt Romney and the One Percenters (ACS)
ManAyz - Rap star (LL)
D'Bagz - Rap star (LL)
Maxi Pad - An all-girl band that knows how to rock (LL)
Dick Tingle - One of the best blues men in the business (Show?)
Lynette and the Lackeys (ACS)
Straw Hat and the Bowties - Jerry Springer's dixieland band who plays at the Knott's Berry Farm Good Time Theater (ACS)
Gut Fluffer (ACS)
Johnny Beaumont and The Legionnaires - All wear matching powder blue tuxedoes (ACS)
Automatic Vaginismus – Great band name (LL)
Dissuade/D’ Suede - Rappeproducer of Kanye/one of Kim's ex beaus (ACS)
Starchy Deuce - Band that should be produced by D' Suede (ACS)
Narthex - (ACS)
Epileptic Declawed Hamster - That is a helluva punk band right there (ACS)
Loretta Lynch - Country singer who sang "Stand By Your Man" (ACS)
The Areolas - Covered an Eagles song in the ‘90s (ACS)
Fleece and Flannel - One of the best lesbian acoustic duos you will ever see (ACS)
3 Chainz - Rap star (ACS)
Blues Squatter - Adam's dad’s band name (ACS)
Tampon Kayak - One of Seattle's greatest, but least heard of indie bands (ACS)
Jizz Grenade (LL)
Dryer Fire - Hot indie band name (ACS)
Iranian Revolutionary Guard - Prince's backup band (ACS)
Rape Kit - Name of Adam's band from high school (ACS)
Nog Bong - A band Adam was in in high school (ACS)
Bum Blazer – Adam’s band in high school (ACS)
White Trash Kimchi - Another good band name (Bald Bryan) (ACS)
White Noise - Adam's rap name (ADS)
Promethazine - Lil Wayne's sister (ADS)
Light Rail - Great Rap name (ADS)
Danny In The Joint - Good indie band name (ACS)
Anal Cleft - One of the worst reggae singers to leave Jamaica (ACS)
Anal Cleft and the Taints - Great reggae group (ACS)
MEL-ROL - One of The Spice Girls (AOTH)
D'bris - Great Rap name (ACS)
Cisgender - A militant female rapper....for the ladies (ACS)
Krav Maga (1) - Country singing Jew (ACS)
Lynette and Paulette - Sounds like a singing duo from the 60's (RD)
Nuts In The Sink - Name of Ray’s new band (Ray) (AOTH)
SubDude - Pete Holmes' rap name (ACS)
Ray And The Enemas - Blues singer and his backup band (ADS)
Yakov Crutchfield - He has a show in Branson (ADS)
Mac 18 - Adam’s favorite rapper (RD)
Tremble Lean – Adam’s rap name (ACBSL)
Sticker Back – Worst band out of Canada ever (ACS)
Pennywise and Pound Foolish - A band from the ‘90's (RD)
Strawberry Shortcake's Neti Pot - Great band name (Twitter)
Puffy Elon Musk - Worst rapper ever (ACS)
Pantera Club at Laguna Seca (Twitter)
Savage Body Attack - New wave romantic band Ace was in when he was 19 (FBL)
Jumping Jazzy Jews - Jeff Goldblum's jazz band (ACS)
Snore Cherry - Great band name (ACS)
Pat Benatard - Pat Benatar cover band (ACS)
Rancid Nuts - Good band name (ACS)
Gary And The Knotholes - Good band name (AOTH)
Tampon Canoe - Good indie band (ACS)
One Erection - A good boy band (ACS)
Flushin' Dew - A good country duo (ACS)
Armo Jeweler - Great band name (RD)
Radon - (Lynette thinks) there a Whitesnake cover-band (ACS)
The Taste Of Ace - Great band name (ACS)
King Grape and the Raisinettes (GS)
Concord Grape and the Raisinettes (GS)
Gary Taco - Love that band (ACS)
The Silence Breakers (2) - Good punk band (Gina) (ACS)
Daddy’s Got A Dually – Good country song (ACS)
Dip Curtain - Good indie band (ACS)
Crystal Lobbyists - Sounds like a great techno band (ACS)
Narcissistic Monk -Great indie band (GS)
Sporty Prius - Worst of the Spice Girls (ACS)
Laden and Bravado - 70s duo who opened for Seals n Crofts (ACS)
The Bouncers - great band name (ACS)
Hurry up and make sense (1) - a good talking heads album (ACS)
Appropriate Sombrero - Maxapada’s next band name (Bryan) (ACS)
Flirtatious Contrail - great rap name (GS)
Jack Johnson - Guy from The White Stripes aka The Black Stripes (ACS)
Sophistry - A great Carol King album (ADS)

Song Titles

Meatless Mondays - Horrible Bangles song (Show?)
Measles and Commuter Trains - Worst Christmas song ever (ACS)
White Guys Be Ownin' Everything - Adam's next hit (ACS)
Blood On The Grout - John Cougar Mellencamp song (ACS)
No Blood In The Peckeroo - Good John Cougar song (ACS)
Mellen's Gold - A three disc box set of nothing but John Cougar Mellencamp hits (ACS)
Freaks, Retards and Jews - Not a Cher song (ACS)
Pedophile Cops - Good Cheap Trick song (ACS)
Pig Anus Soup - Favorite Rolling Stones album (Bryan) (ACS)
That Dog Don’t Mess With Olga and Natalia Don’t Spit No Mo’ - Sounds like a Mississippi Delta blues song (Bryan) (ACS)
Goggles Are For Pussies - Trace Adkins' number one hit (ACAFBSL)
Whistle While You Masturbate - The lost Disney song aka "Whistle While You Jerk" (ACS)
12 Pack & Dick's Hard - Name of Adam's new album (Gina) (ACS)
Blood and Soil - A good Smithereens song (ACS)
Pina Colada in Amsterdam - Worst Jimmy Buffet song ever (ACS)
Tough Times In The City - Great Nick Gilder song (ACS)
I've Got A Hamster In My Scrotum And He's Looking For His Keys - That's a good country song (ACS)
Gay Hitler -Great Elvis Costello song (ACS)
Tard On The Tool Shed - Good Mellenamp song (AOTH)
Condo in Redondo - Sublime song (ADS)
Animoji - Band that sung "Obsession" (ACS)
People Who Have Lost People - Worst Barbara Streisand song ever (ACS)
Tilted Heart - Great Tammy Wynette song (ADS)
Yoga wood - Great Beatles song (ACS)
Anal cleft - Song from the Sound of Music (ACS)
Morgue Mode - Sounds like a guy from Iceland who is a DJ (ACS)
I’ve got a Saturday and two friends - great country song (Gina) (ACS)
Recipe for Misery (2) - Title of the next Guns N Roses album (ACS)
Circling Back To Baldwin - Good name for a country song (ACS)
Keistered in Winnipeg - (Bald’s) favorite Willie Nelson song (ACS)

Football Players/Athletes/Teams:

Legs Akimbo - Wide Receiver (ACS)
Feral Katz - Nose Tackle (ACS)
L' Brarian Booker - Wide Receiver (ACS)
Oscar Buzz - Linebacker (ACS)
DeVigorous Lover - Wide Receiver (ACS)
Nadir Zenith - Placekicker (ACS)
DeGluten Free - Offensive Lineman (ACS)
Tangy Mango - Fullback (ACS)
N'Farious Plan - (position?) (ACS)
Modular Holmes - (position?) (ACS)
Fortuitous Bounce - Safety (ACS)
Operatin' Thetan - (ACS) Quarterback for the Washington Redskins (ACS)
Minority Banks - HOF OLB who died tragically in a car wreck shortly after his HOF induction, a natural athlete, he played option QB in college along with being a stand out member of the track team, and in high school he was captain of the basketball team. Survived by his twin brother Majority Banks, who also played in the league, and daughter Recuser Banks who many believe was the best athlete in the family (ACS)
Coach Platitude - "Take a knee son...helmet's not a chair" (ACS)
Glendora Bevmo - Mother of DeVigorous Lover and L' Brarian Booker (different fathers, of course) (ACS)
Marshall Law - (Allison) (ACS)
Orlando Ceeworld - (position?) (ACS)
Du Vatine - (position?) (Show?)
Raja Slate - Super fast wide-out out of Marshall via LSU (AOTH)
Moe Greene - Great corner for the Washington Redskins in the 80’s (ACS)
Bronx Defenders - Sounds like a AAA hockey team (RD)
Medical Error - Slipped in the draft due to a video being released just prior (ACS)
Homeo Stasis (position?) (ACS)
Capybara - The greatest name for a major league skipper (ACS)
Ejaxico Johnson (position?) (ACS)
Radiant Barrier vs. Attic Fan - The worst WWE matchup ever to grace the stage (AOTH)
Bamboo Brick - one of the greatest mixed martial artists on the planet (AOTH)
Dexter Methorphan - He did not participate in the combines, but his coaches say he can run a 4.3 (Twitter)
Bob Jacuzzi - Great point guard for the Celtics aka "THE COOZE" (ACS)
Shame Negation - Picked to leave Clemson early and go very early in the draft this year. (ADS)
Entertainment Crackers - Another name for the Washington Generals ACS
Hardibacker - Good name for an inside backer (ACS)
Osmosis - Black dude. Forward for the Knicks who might or might not have been traded (ADS)
Onus Wilson - NFL draftee (ACS)
World Be Mine - Adam’s new basketball name (ACS)

Porn Star Names/Terms/Gay Code:

Spoodini - (LL)
Rocky Stucco - (AOTH)
No Can Doo - Backdoor anal queen of China (ACS)
Kristallnacht - Worst porn star name in the business (ACS)
Madison Avenue (I am Rappaport Podcast)
Hero Du Jour (I am Rappaport Podcast)
Kindle Fire (ACS)
Jackson Hole - Gay porn actor (ACS)
Col. Duke Lacrosse - Adam's porn name (LL)
Duke Circumference - Adam's gay porn name (ACS)
Rich Data - Gay porn actor (Show?)
Tom Foolery - Gay porn actor (Show?)
Honey Dijon - Great porn star name (Show?)
Aids Machete - One of Adam's gay porn names. "Very short stint, I only did 2 weeks with that name, so it was like 41 movies." (ACS)
Bryce Canyon - Great gay porn name (ACS)
The Italian Coastguard - A gay move. "Let me just start with basic anal, then I'll slide into the Italian Coast Guard." (ACS)
Tetanus Gym - Good gay porn name "Who you working with?" "Tetanus Gym." "Oh boy, make sure you're on top" (ACS)
Shared A Back Fence - gay slang (ACS)
Mea Culpa - Adam's porn name (ACS)
Hand Twins - Gay code (ACS)
Backscatter - Porn technology (PM)
Cajun Tree Climber - Gay code (AOTH)
Snow Blower- Gay code (AOTH)
Stump Grinder - Gay code (AOTH)
Tumbler And Coaster - Adam's gay slang replacement for "top and bottom" (PM)
Go For A Bike Ride - Gay code (ACS)
Artie Fartie - Adam's porn name from the 80's (ACS)
Road Island Ray - Ray's porn name (AOTH)
38KKK -A type of porn that comes out of Kentucky (ACS)
Tech Screw - A dirty website for geeks (ACS)
Bearvalanche - Worst gay move ever (ACS)
Wacked Off Pieces Of Cactus - Gay code for gay rough trade (ACS)
Brad Nail - Good gay porn name (ADS)
Lightning Rod - Good gay porn name for Milo Yiannopplous (ADS)
Milk Barn - Another name for Adam's bathroom sink (ACS)
Meat Thievery - That's just good gay code (ACS)
Hairy Shin - Adam's gay porn name (ACS)
Asian Persuasion - Sounds like a good name for a porn series Asian persuasion 16 (ACS)
Cock Holster - Good movie series, cock holster 14 (ACS)
Celebrity Du Jour - Great porn name (ACS)
Europol - Another great porn name (ACS)
Roy Wood - Adam's gay porn name (ACS)
Tank slapper - Gay slang (Gina) (ACS)
Porch Pirate - Gay term (ACS)
Mad Chuck - The world's worst name for a gay porn star (AOTH)
Sweat lodge - Gay code (ACS)
The L.A. Underground - Sounds like a gay bar (M&J)
Skin and grin - Gay slang (ACS)
Rear Admiral - The name of one of the best bars on west side (ACS)
Loaded for bear - Now a gay term (GS)
Fruit Of The Year - A porn Dave (Dameshek) starred in (ACS)
The Lebanese Comedian - Ace's favorite sex position (ACS)
Cockout - When a gay guy doesn't try very hard (ACS)
Margana Wood - Porn name (ACS)
Hugh Bris - Porn star (RD)
Matte Clear - Fondalier’s gay porn name (AOTH)
Palatial Estates – A good 80’s fake tittie porn name (AOTH)
Cokie Roberts - Great porn name (ACS)
Armenian Christmas - An unspeakable sexual act in prison. "Johnny ratted out the white supremacists to the warden, so they gave him an Armenian Christmas" (Show?)
Ride The Pine - Gay slang (ADS)
Meet Gaze - Gay slang (ACS)
Asshole Rider - Gay slang (ACS)
Cash Widedick - Ace's porn name if you can call an apple a honey crisp. (ACS)
Shanda Lear - Great stripper name (Gina) (ACS)
Fiery Cherry - Good porn name (ACS)
Jerk the wheel - Code for masturbation (ACS)
Giddyup Titties - Gina’s porn name (Gina) (ACS)
French astronaut - Great gay slang (ACS)
Mr Bandera - gay code (ACS)
Beefmato/Clamato - sounds like names of venerial diseases (ACS)
Spanner - Australian gay code (ACS)
Rocky tenure - Adam’s gay porn name (ACS)
The End Game - One of Stormy Daniels movie titles (RD)
Room for cream - Great porno title (Gina) (ACS)
Pedialyte shower - Worst sexual act ever (Sklar) (ACS)
Foot Zunki - Add-on to the Pedialyte shower (ACS)
Self rimming sink - gay slang (AOTH)
Harvey Mudd - gay bar drink where vermouth and bartender shit is mixed in a goblet (ACS)
Barney’s Beanery - ultimate name for a gay bar (ACS)
Parallel park both ways - euphemism for being bi (GS)
The Big Three - Gerago’s junk (RD)
73 - When a fat guy tries to 69 with a chubby prostitute he met at a ham radio convention(ACS)
Backlog - Stormy Daniels movie title (Bryan)(ACS)
Madison Bear - Sounds like an dating app for gay hairy dudes who are married (ACS)

Miscellaneous People

Trajectory Hagar - High school kid "heading down the wrong path" in life (ACS)
Slick Mouth - Adam's prison name (ACS)
Rich Carless - Cool homeless guy name (ACS)
Keyless Chuck - Best homeless guy name (ACS)
Nasal Ranger - Worst superhero name ever (Gina) (ACS)
Krav Maga (2) - Good name for a sheriff (ADS)
Hubcap Annie - Horror that hangs out with Keyless Chuck (ACS)
Becky Honkington (Allison) (ACS)
Monica Chugscock - (Pronounced "Shuggscawk") (ADS)
Tyvek DuPont - Best rich guy’s name (AOTH)
Mattress - A Model/actress (ACS)
Hofmeister Kink - Nazi war criminal who's been in hiding in Brazil for the past 61 years. aka Jake Johnson (ACS)
Serpiginous - The world's wimpiest swordsman. Sir Piginous of Wussville (LL)
Chick Fil a - Great play-by-play guy for the Warriors from the 70’s (Show?)
Peri Menopausal - Best P.I. working the Chicago beat (LL)
Whiskey Dick - The neighborhood pedophile in the clown outfit (ACS)
Surge - Guy that drives for ÜBER (ACS)
Babbling Brook - Great name for a female cattle auctioneer (PM)
Terra Firma - Name of the "woman of color" that heckled Adam at a Ventura live show and was removed by force (The Ranker Podcast)
Octomom - Great Batman villain (Bryan) (ACS)
Larry The Cabinet Guy - Failed Israeli comic…"Don't get 'er done!" (ACS)
Rod Blagojevich - Joe Francis' slimy brother who sells above ground pools out of a primered van (ACS)
Cockchug Man - The gay superhero in The Village People that wears just all leather (ACS)
MEL-ROL- She's one of The Spice Girls (AOTH)
Hand Farts - A new comedian Adam had never heard of (ACS)
Juan Jeremy - The greatest international film star ever (ACS)
Bitchathane Jackson - Good name for a "sista" (ACS)
Tobar - Perfect caveman name (ACS)
Vroman - A fast moving Roman (ACS)
Korn Syrup and Fructose - Women of color who work at the strip club with Jade (stage 4) (ACS)
Fred Meyer - Lucy's neighbor (ACS)
Kimchi - The Asian flutist (ACS)
Pacoima - The mechanic from Taxi (ACS)
Dick Salt - NATO Alliance General (ACS)
Dick Salt (2) - Manger of the Mariners in the early 70’s (Bryan) (ACS)
Caramel And Fudge - Two more African-American prostitutes that lived in the apartment above Adam’s (ACS)
Peaches - The whore that lived upstairs (ACS)
F. Me Bailey - Greatest lawyer of all time (RD)
Agua Caliente - Loves that guy. He does a great John Madden (ACS)
Senior Penis - One the most dangerous drug lords to ever work (ADS)
Shill Du'Jour - Good Bond secretary name (RD)
Brexit Romero - Sounds like an International assassin (ACS)
Lugansk - That gay diver who hit his head and gave the whole Canadian team AIDS (ACS)
Leak O'rama - A Dutch action star, starred in “Sudden Death” (AOTH)
Vaginismus - Great black guy name (ADS)
Normcore - Guy that owns Westwood one (ACS)
LaTolstoy - Great black guy name (ACS)
Shapiro – Artist who is really good at anime. Died in the 60’s but was a real trendsetter (ACS)
Chuck Spears – Good name for a racist. “Hey you workin’ with Chuck Spears over at the Klan?” (ACS)
Norethindrone - DAG’s Sister (CLL)
La Tuskegee - Black airline pilot (ACS)
C-clamps – Nickname for Adam’s step-mom. “Ol’ C-clamps locked me out of the house again.” (ACS)
Harry Nilsson - (Gary thinks) he does the voices on The Simpsons (ADS)
Nutella - Great name for a crazy black woman (ACS)
Sia - The perfect person to break up with. Would be perfect if she was dating Jack (hit the road Jack) (ACS)
The Ball Catcher - What Adam used to call Ray's ass in junior high (ACFBSL)
MOAB - Matt's new nickname (Mother of All Buttholes) (AONTH)
Trip Reeb - Great name for a white guy (ACS)
Merle Horn - One of the greatest best ropers to ever come down the Pecos (ACS)
The Boring Machine - Lynette's name for Adam (ACS)
Avocado Hand - The nickname of Eric Clapton's brother (Chet) who works at a Mexican place and is charge of the guacamole (ACS)
Bagel Hand - Clapton's Jewish cousin (ACS)
Fa-Sheeya (fascia) - A heavy set woman of color that works at the DMV (ACAFBSL)
Ghrelin - New AM/PM mascot (ACS)
Krav Maga (3) - An Israeli Captain from 1946 (ACS)
Cuban Boa - Sounds like a dark skinned trannie (ACS)
Gabardine - She's a very chatty woman of color middle-aged and she'll talk your ear off. (ACS)
Guy Dudebro - Greatest name ever (AOTH)
Otto Warmbier- Simultaneously the greatest and worst beer master brewer name ever (ACS)
Leif Geragos - Greatest rocking attorney ever Viking rocker attorney (ACS)
Ernest J. Bigot - "I'm just asking....I'm just wanna know...." (ACS)
Panzanella - Cobra's full name (ACS)
Sheet Metal Nibbler - Great name for Matt the porcelain punisher (AOTH)
Big Grenadine - Sounds like a large black neighbor (ACS)
Silent gym - Next to Keyless Chuck, best homeless guy name ever (ACS)
Nuchilla - Sounds like a black vampire (Theo Von) (ACS)
D' poleon - Black Napoleon (ACS)
Luke Rockhold - Sounds like a character on The Flintstones (GS)
Sissy squat - She was hot (AOTH)
Beulah - The town horror (RD)
Ronan Farrow - One of the best wheel men in Europe (ACS)
Duke Bagg - Comedian Ian Bagg's brother (ACS)
Root ball grinder - A horrible term for a bitchy wife (Ruth Ballgrinder and Harriet Mulcher) (Tim Allen) (ACS)
Paul Funyun - Just a big dude who likes to have fun. Has a pink ox as a sidekick (ACS)
Page/Savage - A great lawyer team (Adam Ray) (ACS)
Ivar the Boneless - Ace’s dad’s nickname in high school. aka Jim the spineless (ACS)
Bash Worthy - Comic strip's character name/title (ACS)
Uncle Tom-bién - Mexican Uncle Tom (ACS)
Alist Poon - An Indian exchange student who has cerebral palsy (ACS)
Indignant Asswipes - Good name for an improv troupe (Gina) (ACS)
Flora in Fauna - two black chicks that work for him (ADS)
Cheap - Name of a he/she that literally went under sexual assignment surgery last month (ACS)
Heroin (1)(Pronounced Ehr-o-win by JCVD) A character in Lord Of The Rings (Bryan) (ACS)
Yersinia pestis - Ace did Celebrity Apprentice with that dude. He won that year (ADS)
Morgue Mode - Sounds like a guy from Iceland who is a DJ (ACS)
Rachel Bias - Great stripper name (ACS)
Buzz Ramjet - Aviation attorney (ACS)
Black Cherry - Stripper name Bryan (ACS)
Saffron - Sassy black woman in Meg Whitman movie (ACS)
Vibranium - a new black kid name from Black Panther (ACS)
Bird Nerd - Marvel superhero (ACS)
Merch Galore - Worst Bond secretary ever. Total sellout. Always wearing her own swag (GS)

Morning Zoos/DJ's/Radio Stations

Gum and Condoms - (Show?)
Dusty Labia - Adam's handle when he used to do AM Mornings. (ACS)
Asscrack and Backsack in the morning with Sludge (LL)
Crockpots and Headphones (ACS)
Booger and Floor Wax (ACS)
Almonds and Water (ACS)
Cold Butter And Calves (ADS)
Schluter And The Drain - Schluter has a thick Austrian accent , while "The Drain" has a super low voice (AOTH)
Ace Rockolla - Just Google "Ace Rockolla Lightning round...." (LL)
Fungus and Mold (Show?)
Stupid and Petty (Show?)
Eunice and Edgar - Bubba the Love Sponge's parents (ACS)
Flip Flops and Fanny Packs (ACS)
Hairy Shin - Does a KCRE show in the weekends (ACS)
Deep Bra Grooves - Should be a Sirius XM station Channel 248, C+ and above! (ACS)
Andy and Opie - Great Radio Show (ACS)
QuietRock - Sounds like an easy listening rock station (AOTH)
Quiet Crush - A good easy listening radio station (ACS)
The Tool Box - SiriusXM took tune station aka KTOL (ACS)
Ray's Enema Antics - New podcast on Carolla Digital (Bryan)(ACS)
Doug Gets Blown While He Eats Pudding - Doug Benson's next podcast (ACS)
Cat Packer - Used to do mornings with her brother, Fudge (ACS)
Duke and Shinola - good morning show team (ACS)
Mother Trucker - Adam’s Podcast with caller Miguel (AOTH)

Places

Boobville - (LL)
Pedoph Isle aka Pedophile Island - Island where are all the pedophiles are sent to live. (Also a TV show/movie idea) (LL)
Lil' Lord Fauntleroy’s Academy for Albino Hemophiliacs - Drew's childhood school (LL)
Doesntexistizcan - Where presidential candidate Platitude's grandfather was from (ACS)
Boga Raton - The world's worst resort spot (Show?)
Meat Yard - Great name for a gay bar (ACS)
Mister Fister's - Adam's all-time top name for a gay bar (ACS)
Sub-Par - Worst name for a submarine sandwich shop (Show?)
Queen Mary - Great name for a tranny bar (ACS)
NuvaRing - A German racetrack. "The new Nissan GTR turned it in 7:21, faster than the Corvette." (Show?)
Louis Pasteur Middle School (ACS)
Helm’s Deep - World's first gay bar bakery (ACS)
Kal Penn - One of the best sounding names to get an engineering degree from (ACS)
Alaska State Motto - Love fishing but I hate your kids? Alaska! (PM)
Duke University - John Wayne's college (ACS)
Planned Possumhood - Planned Parenthood in Arkansas (ACS)
Fruit Stand - Great name for a gay bar (ACS)
Poo Poo City - Where Charles Fletcher Loomis' house is located (ACS)
Blood Bank - Great name for a check cashing place in the hood (ACS)
Bass Manor - Great name for a gay bar (ACS)
The Dead C - Sounds like the worst name for a lesbian bar ever (ACS)
Wood Bar - Good name for a gay bar (ACS)
Ghost Load - Ride at Calico Ghost Town (ADS)
Nasacort - Country club for Jewish folks where they play tennis at (ADS)
L.A. HOTT (1) - An 80's bar with an outdoor door seating area (ACS)
Fairy Wings - Good name for a bar on the west side (ACS)
Second Hand/First World - Store that sells rich whitey’s high end stuff (ACS)
The Lance Hunter - Perfect name for a gay bar (Dumb People Town)
Pervert Park - Theo Vaughn grew up there (ACS)
Big Sur - Great name for a big and tall shop (Show?)
Studio Centric - Sounds like a Utopia. Between Valley Village and Sherman Oaks (AOTH)
Asstard - Thor came from that planet (ACS)
Grand Entrance - Great name for a gay bar (AOTH)
Thermopolis - Where the Bun Boy is (ACS)
The Turkish Embassy - Gay bar (ACS)
Low Tide - Gay code for boner in the rear view mirror (ACS)
Corumption - On the way to Vegas, where Heidi Fleiss lives with her macaws (ACS)
C.C. Fichens - Sounds like a pretzel stand (Gina) (ACS)
Timpani Barn - where to get timpani to go, has three big Mexicans in the kitchen (ACS)
Heroin (2)(Pronounced Ehr-o-win by JCVD) The health food store in Venice (ACS)
Pocket Passers - Next to Mister Fister’s (Gina) (ACS)
The Mexican Faire - Worst fair ever (ACS)
Hanoi Hospice - Only place worse than the Hanoi Hilton (ACS)
Kaleblazer- Gay juice bar (ACS)
Hot Dog Cannon - good name for a bar next to The Abbey (ACS)
Dyskeratosis - where Vinnie lives, lots of Greek folks, a family oriented community (ACS)

Miscellaneous

Cleaning The Pink Turtle - Bryan's name for pleasuring oneself (ACS)
Analingus - A new type of breath mint (LL)
The Milk Of Arthritic Goats - A rabbi's curse: "May you suckle at the teet of the milk of arthritic goat!!!" (ACS)
Carbon Dating - A black dating website (ACS)
RU486 - Vanity plate for a guy who runs an abortion clinic (ADS)
Jet Green - Amsterdam's Airlines (ACS)
Stromer, Oldhafer and Carolla - World's worst law firm (AOTH)
Ira Carolla - Sounds like an affliction "Oh my Ira Carolla's acting up" (ACS)
Sawjay - Sounds French...gay word for sausage. "I was strokin' this dude’s sawjay" (ACS)
Smokeless Cigarette - Name for Dr. Drew's honker after his prostate surgery (ADS)
El Niño - Name of "Sinn" strip club DJ's cock (ACS)
Blue Man - Crazy hairdresser's macaw who doesn't judge (PM)
Lucia - An Italian moped (ACS)
American Jewish World Service - A van that's begging to be shot at (ACS)
E-aye? - Canadian version of EBay (ACS)
Sweatpants Lesbian - What Adam would be. An in-between lesbian. Not a lipstick lesbian, not a butch dyke (ACS)
SuckStrong - Bill Clinton's bracelet (ACS)
Gaybus - Gay and bogus (ACS)
Flappy Bird - The most offensive name for the vagina (ACS)
G8 (Summit) - The Pontiac that Oprah gave away on her show (ACS)
Oracle A The Delphi - Big new startup company (ADS)
Crewkakke - A type of sweater (ACS)
The Flying Dutchman - Great name for an Amsterdam airlines (ACS)
Cleaning My Chain - Euphemism for beating off (ACS)
Awesome Town - A gathering of three or more polar bears (ACS)
Avocado - The Greek word for nut sack (ACS)
Doucherette - A gum/patch that douchebags chew/use (ACS)
Urban Milling -Black guys standing around (AOTH)
Synesthesia - When you eat your own hair (ACS)
Tuck Rule - When a guy pretends he's a chick and stands in front of the mirror (ACS)
My #2 Pencil Is Out Of Lead - Another term for erectile dysfunction (ACS)
Float A Bond - When a politician farts (RD)
Vaginismus - black people's holiday, accompanied with a lot of ceremonial garb (ADS)
Vaseline and Gauze - Elizabeth Taylor's new scent (ACS)
Jewber - A drunk on a 10-speed (ACS)
Chickpea - What Gina does when we camp (ACS)
Oscar Squad (2) - Bad gay code (ACS)
Airbus - Worst name for an aircraft. Sounds like “air donkey” (AOTH)
Shailene Woodley - Sounds like the most fantastical verb/adverb combo. “I want to Shailene Woodley through a field of poppies with you” (Gina) (Twitter)
Asshole Rider (2) - Worst piece of exercise equipment Vinnie’s ever endorsed (ACS)
Diario La Prensa - Stealer of the jersey in Spanish (ACS)
The Sicilian Fly Swatter - Sounds like a WWF move (Gina) (ACS)
Jellyfish - Sounds like something your grandpa would buy for you at the mall (ACS)
Fruit Fly - More politically correct term for fag hag (Show?)
Jewgling - When a Jew "Googles" their symptoms (ACS)
Tavares - David Wild's boner medicine (ACS)
Jew -Over - A mulligan from a barmitzva. "Uh, I misread that...can I get a Jew-over?" (ACS)
Ossified - That's a Don King word, there (ACS)
Zero for Cecil - Worst charity ever (Bald Bryan) (ACS)
A++ - A bra that Gina will never see (ACS)
Joycelyn - A good name for Curly from the Three Stooges to say (ACS)
Phallisee - Latin for "to see the penis" (ADS)
Coffee Nap - Euphemism for pooping in your pants (ACS)
USS Monitor - Doesn't sound like a ship of war, sounds like a night nurse (ACS)
Dotard - A skirt a man wears (ACS)
Wilding- Something derogatory that takes place in public pools in certain counties (ACS)
Caveat - Latin for shitting on Adam's point (ADS)
Festiva - Sounds like a boner medicine (ACS)
Depeche Mode - French for “who dealt it?” (ADS)
Beefy Clutch – The purse Gina thought Lady Gaga took to the Emmy’s (ACS)
Sig Sauer - Something you would yell at Oktoberfest before downing a stiff stein of stout (ACS)
Jeans day – Sounds like the special day for your special need son Gene, to raise money (ACS)
Wilding - What takes place in public pools in certain counties (GS)
4F - Can’t/won’t be eligible for the draft (ACS)
Groupie - a kind of fish (ACS)
The African chick - Horrible name for a boat (ACS)
Inclusion rider - Snowboard for retarded kids (ACS)
The Urethra - Bad name for a car (ACS)
Mercury retrograde - when you take your index finger and shove it under your sack before you blow, and you belch it up later (ACS)
UEFA - Transsexuals playing soccer with a balled up maxi pad (GS)
Missed Connections- The worst airline ever (ACS)
Carollo - Sounds like a Tool you’d use rarely (ACS)
Brembo - that Mexican food company that makes that bread (Matt) (ACS)
Preemptive gay strike - Worst video game ever (ADS)
Futon - Chinese for bear trap (ACS)

Food/Drinks

Deer Bits - A venison cereal. Made of frosted deer flakes (Show?)
Coco Chanel - Nestlé’s newest coffee flavor (ACS)
Honey Dicks - Best cereal name ever (ACS)
Dawson's Beard - A pudding flavor Ace saw at Whole Foods (ACS)
Mighty Mutts - Worst breakfast cereal ever (ADS)
Chillax - A cinnamon based drink from "Hector's" country (ACS)
Black Dick - An English desert (ACS)
Tardy Digression - Sounds like a finger food..."would you like another tardy digression?" "No, I'm saving room for the main meal" (IFYWABC)
Double Bird Strike - Mixed drink created by Ace and Teresa. Made with Grey Goose, Wild Turkey, a splash of Canadian Club, and a splash of Hudson River water (ACS)
GAYtorade - A sports drink for gay people, because they lose essential body fluids (ACS)
University of Illinois At Urbana Champaign - Sounds like a carbonated drink for black people (ACS)
Flinch Fuck - Part of a nutritious breakfast, and a healthy relationship (ADS)
Phantom Punch - Something Bill Cosby gave his lady friends (ACS)
Pansy Sauce - Goes good with some shrimp (ADS)
Tilted Pillar - Kick ass IPA (AOTH)
Shaver - A good name for a miniature pastrami sandwich (Cousin Sal Show)
GPA - Something they add to children's cereal (ACS)
Stellwell's - A new low fat snack cracker (ACS)
Conchata Ferrell - A great cheese/unwanted cat (ACS)
Poopwell's - One of the worst snacks Nabisco has ever put their name on (ACS)
Belldini – Latest Taco Bell offering (ACS)
Fuzzy Zoeller – Zima with a jigger of peach schnapps (ACS)
Millennial Malaise - A sweet honey dipping sauce (ADS)
Jelani Cobb - Sounds like an Indian dish (Gina) (ACS)
Air Doodle - The very worst Super Bowl snack on the planet (ACS)
Faygala - Jewish sports drink (ACS)
Stroke Cane - Sounds like some sugary treat, mixed with a reach around (ACS)
The Silence Breakers (2) - good name for a mint (ACS)
Lesbian Squirt - Sponsor of the Dinah Shore Classic (ACS)
Son of Goose - Worst vodka ever. Comes in a plastic squeeze bottle (ACS)
Orange Hitler - Worst Hi-C flavor ever (ACS)

TV Shows/Movies

Cunt du' Jour - A great Bond villain name (ACS)
Coffee and Donuts - (Charlie Coffee III and Johnny Donetti) Johnny's a tough street wise cop whose jive talking and plays by his own rules and Charlie's super uptight (LL)
Pedoph Isle (aka) Pedophile Island - All pedophiles are sent to live on an isolated island, and a 747 full of Boy Scouts crash lands there and they have to fight to survive (Also a place) (ACS)
Anus and Eyeball - Buddy cop TV show duo (ACS)
Pussy Pioneer - John Candy's last movie (ACS)
Red Velvet - Made up movie character Clown played by Paul Giamatti. "Was secret service, and someone died on his watch. Now he's takin to clownin'." Wears a red velvet clown outfit. (ACS)
Destination Of The Semen - (Adam Ray) A movie Harrison Ford passed on twice (ACS)
Gay Eye - Movie where Adam plays Buddy McKlan, a racist homophobic mechanic who is blinded in a freak hot transmission fluid accident. He gets the donor eyes from a gay guy who perished on a moped accident in Antigua. Co-starring Larry the Cable Guy as his best friend. (Co-written by Bryan Cranston) (ACS)
Grinders - Sitcom where Jon Gruden moves in with Johnny Manziel (ACS)
Squishy Red River - Movie that started John Wayne (Show?)
Gusset And Cable - Perfect Cop buddy duo team (AOTH)
Just One Of The Gays - Stars Shia LaBeouf (ACS)
Hard Impact - Sounds like a Van Damme movie from the 90's (ACS)
Hammer Pants And Ice - Worst cop detective duo from the 80's (ACS)
Living With The Kilowatts - Adam's new animated series where they just leave toaster ovens on all day (ACS)
Keep Calm And Rape A Lot - Worst Monty Python film ever (ACS)
Medical Mishaps - New show Dave Coulier and Tawny Kitaen could host (ACS)
Roaming With Bison - Another great Bill Murray movie (ACS)
Gainesville Florida Financial Planner - Sounds like a Saturday Night Live skit (ACS)
Blame the Bee Gees - Adam's next documentary (ACS)
Adam Knees Your Dad In The Nuts - Adam's new game show (ACS)
Navigeddon - Terrorists take over all of the GPS systems of cars, and send them careening into the Grand Canyon (ACS)
Rings Of Honor - Terrorists take over Olympic training facility in Colorado Springs, and the athletes have to use their individual skills to escape. (Cameo by Randy Couture as the salty old coach) (ACS)
Endless Time/Ample Time For Backup - Adam's new Netflix series (ACS)
Tarred n' Feathered - Buddy flick starring a retarded guy and an Indian chief (Show?)
Mr. Will Doo And Can Doo - PSA Motivational cartoon bathroom characters Will Doo (Played by Will Arnette) and Can Doo is shaped like a toilet. Filmed in kitschy Clutch Cargo style animation (ADS)
Robot Lawyer - Great Phil Hartman bit (ACS)
Umpire News Network - Adam's channel with umpires reporting. Unbiased reporting (ACS)
Sofa Tard - New CW show coming soon (Matt) (AOTH)
Junior Fantasy Island - Show where kids of reckless parents are shipped off to live with Bill Cosby and Felicia Rashad (ADS)
2 And A Half Denali's - Hasn't been same since Sheen left (ACS)
So Kanye - Sitcom from the 90's (ACS)
Ridicuopothy - Sounds like a Mike Judge movie (ADS)
Master Buck - One of John Candy's most controversial movies (ACS)
LA HOTT (1) - An 80’s bar with an outdoor door seating area (ACS)
Mother Hitler - Coming to TNT. Starring Patrick Swayze's bother, Don (ACS)
Sink and Bounce - Movie about roller boogie from the 80's, starred Lil' Bow Wow (ACS)
The Debs - A made up CW network show where you just put all the hot chicks in Hollywood (ACS)
The Origin Story Of AIDS - Worst Marvel movie ever (Bryan)(ACS)
Everybody Hates Vinnie - Horrible sitcom (ACS)
Chick Clan - Good movie title (ACS)
Condo in Redondo - Best movie I ever did (ADS)
Red Lobsteria - New show Dr. Drew was talking about where African Americans form their own country (ACS)
Earthquake rehab - Reality show Dr. drew seismic expert and a civil engineer come together (Rainn Wilson) (ACS)
Rooster Jones - Great John Wayne movie. Super Fly meets True Grit (ACS)
Ernest Bigot goes to..... (ACS)
Nickels On The Job - First and only Jewish gum shoe on the job. ABC, Friday nights, 10:00 p.m. (ADS)
Solicitor General - Great Danny Kaye movie (RD)
Disjointed - Lorena Bobbitt biopic (ADS)
Habib and Company - Horrible children's show (MS)
Bobby's Room - Howie Mandel animated project from the 90's (ACS)
Page/Savage - Great cop duo show from the ‘80’s (Adam Ray) (ACS)
Paper Asshole - Great Tatum O’Neal film (ACS)
L.A. HOTT (2) - Failed Steven Bochco series pilot (ACS)
Pieces Of String Too Small To Use - Lena Dunham film from the late 90’s (ACS)
Oscar Squad - New Marvel Movie (Gina) (ACS)
Cortron/Melamine - Transformers (Gina) (ACS)
Anoscope - Worst way to see a movie (ADS)
Practical Rapist - New SNL character (Gina) (ACS)
Superfoot - Worst Marvel movie ever (Bryan) (ACS)
Celebrity Food Chain - Would be a great show (Jeff Cesario) (ACS)
Backsack and Anus - Worst cop duo ever (RS)
Korean moyle - ABC’s next sitcom (Jeff) ACS
Nanny Huntin ‘with Ted Nugent - Great reality show I’d watch (ACS)
Progressive pope - New sitcom (Gina) ACS
Nick Mancuso: Construction Fluffer - New TV Show (AONT)
Rush Blitzer - Adam’s character from his movie, “Snapper” (BSR)
The Baldwin’s and Beyond -Great reality show (RD)
The Rogue Deuce - The next Star Wars movie (ADS)

Books/Coffee Table Books

Dade County Black Prom, 1985 (ACS)
Here Are The Pajamas We Picture You In (ACS)
Three Shitty Homes, One Washing Machine, Zero Dryers - Title of Adam's new book (Ray) (AOTH)
Chapstick And Batteries - Title of Adam's next bestselling book (ACS)
Who The Fuck Put Their Sombrero on My Keys? – Title of Adam’s next book (ACS)
Cunt With A Grunt - Adam's favorite Dr. Seuss book (PM)
You'll Never See A Cockroach Jog (PM)
Kemo Skinny Calves - Adam's new children's book (ADS)
You're Dyslexic And I'm Dumb - Adam and John Popper's collaborative next book (ACS)
I Get It If You’re GWAR - Adam's next book (ACS)
Bulk Magazine - Costco magazine that Jimmy Kimmell graced the cover of twice (ACS)
Do You Have To Take Your Top Off To Dye Your Pubes, Drew? (LL)
Glamping With Moriah - Adam's new book (ACS)
From The Mouths of Babes (Hot Chicks Not Babies) (ACS)
(The) Sweet Spot - Adam's next book (Bryan) (ACS)
I Thought Things Would Be Better When I Was Rich (ACS)
Radio Station Kitchen (ACS)
Post-it Notes In Radio Station Kitchens (ACS)
Comedy Club Green Rooms And The Sofas That Were Not Made For Them (ACS)
Jethro, the Mexican Jew - A great children's book (Gina) (ACS)
Professor and the Construction Worker -The worst children's book ever (ACS)
Willie and the Weed - Good name for a children's book (ACS)
What Black People Think White People Complain About (ACS)
Everyone Eventually Becomes The Man (ACS)
Recipe for Misery (1) - Name Of Adam’s next book (ACS)
In Defense Of Black Face - Adam’s next book (ACS)
Hurry Up And Make Sense (2) - Biography title of the Talking Heads (ACS)

Native American Names

Chief Thunderbear (LL)
Dances With Cocks (ACS)
Dances With Lipstick (ACS)
Ol' Urethra Windows (ACS)
Oxnard - Indian name meaning the balls of a bull (ACS)

V/P Names

Absorbent Rag - Good name for T's V (ACS)
Hurt Locker - Another name for T's V (ACS)
Judge's Mansion - Another name for T's G
Cmarket.com - Another name for T's V (ACS)
City of Industry - Another name for T's V (ACS)
Dutch Mook - Another name for T's V (ACS)s V
No Safe Spaces - Great name for T's V (ACS)
Hobo Stove - Another name for A's V (ACS)
Sausage Grinder - Another name for A's V (ACS)
Dixville Notch - Another name for G's V (ACS)
Snake River Canyon - Another name for G's V (ACS)
Dakota Access Pipeline - Another name for G's V (ACS)
The Holidome - Another name for G’s V (ACS)
Discovery Bay - Great name for G's V (ACS)
B.O. Box - Great name for G's V (ACS)
Sea bag - Good name for G's V (ACS)
El Portal - Great name for G's V (ACS)
Harry Belafonte - Adam's name for his junk, if he were a woman (Show?)
Top Gear - Another name for Adam’s junk (ACS)
El Gordo/King Taco - Good name for G’s V (ACS)
submitted by Texas1971 to AdamCarolla [link] [comments]


2018.06.03 08:18 peterboykin Carollaisms J(une)

Carollaisms J(une)
Carollaisms J(une)Carollaisms J(une)Carollaisms J(une)Carollaisms J(une)Carollaisms J(une)Carollaisms (June)Band Names/Rap StarsMitt Romney and the One Percenters (ACS)ManAyz - Rap star (LL)D'Bagz - Rap star (LL)Maxi Pad - An all-girl band that knows how to rock (LL)Dick Tingle - One of the best blues men in the business (Show?)Lynette and the Lackeys (ACS)Straw Hat and the Bowties - Jerry Springer's dixieland band who plays at the Knott's Berry Farm Good Time Theater (ACS)Gut Fluffer (ACS)Johnny Beaumont and The Legionnaires - All wear matching powder blue tuxedoes (ACS)Automatic Vaginismus – Great band name (LL)Dissuade/D’ Suede - Rappeproducer of Kanye/one of Kim's ex beaus (ACS)Starchy Deuce - Band that should be produced by D' Suede (ACS)Narthex - (ACS)Epileptic Declawed Hamster - That is a helluva punk band right there (ACS)Loretta Lynch - Country singer who sang "Stand By Your Man" (ACS)The Areolas - Covered an Eagles song in the ‘90s (ACS)Fleece and Flannel - One of the best lesbian acoustic duos you will ever see (ACS)3 Chainz - Rap star (ACS)Blues Squatter - Adam's dad’s band name (ACS)Tampon Kayak - One of Seattle's greatest, but least heard of indie bands (ACS)Jizz Grenade (LL)Dryer Fire - Hot indie band name (ACS)Iranian Revolutionary Guard - Prince's backup band (ACS)Rape Kit - Name of Adam's band from high school (ACS)Nog Bong - A band Adam was in in high school (ACS)Bum Blazer – Adam’s band in high school (ACS)White Trash Kimchi - Another good band name (Bald Bryan) (ACS)White Noise - Adam's rap name (ADS)Promethazine - Lil Wayne's sister (ADS)Light Rail - Great Rap name (ADS)Danny In The Joint - Good indie band name (ACS)Anal Cleft - One of the worst reggae singers to leave Jamaica (ACS)Anal Cleft and the Taints - Great reggae group (ACS)MEL-ROL - One of The Spice Girls (AOTH)D'bris - Great Rap name (ACS)Cisgender - A militant female rapper....for the ladies (ACS)Krav Maga (1) - Country singing Jew (ACS)Lynette and Paulette - Sounds like a singing duo from the 60's (RD)Nuts In The Sink - Name of Ray’s new band (Ray) (AOTH)SubDude - Pete Holmes' rap name (ACS)Ray And The Enemas - Blues singer and his backup band (ADS)Yakov Crutchfield - He has a show in Branson (ADS)Mac 18 - Adam’s favorite rapper (RD)Tremble Lean – Adam’s rap name (ACBSL)Sticker Back – Worst band out of Canada ever (ACS)Pennywise and Pound Foolish - A band from the ‘90's (RD)Strawberry Shortcake's Neti Pot - Great band name (Twitter)Puffy Elon Musk - Worst rapper ever (ACS)Pantera Club at Laguna Seca (Twitter)Savage Body Attack - New wave romantic band Ace was in when he was 19 (FBL)Jumping Jazzy Jews - Jeff Goldblum's jazz band (ACS)Snore Cherry - Great band name (ACS)Pat Benatard - Pat Benatar cover band (ACS)Rancid Nuts - Good band name (ACS)Gary And The Knotholes - Good band name (AOTH)Tampon Canoe - Good indie band (ACS)One Erection - A good boy band (ACS)Flushin' Dew - A good country duo (ACS)Armo Jeweler - Great band name (RD)Radon - (Lynette thinks) there a Whitesnake cover-band (ACS)The Taste Of Ace - Great band name (ACS)King Grape and the Raisinettes (GS)Concord Grape and the Raisinettes (GS)Gary Taco - Love that band (ACS)The Silence Breakers (2) - Good punk band (Gina) (ACS)Daddy’s Got A Dually – Good country song (ACS)Dip Curtain - Good indie band (ACS)Crystal Lobbyists - Sounds like a great techno band (ACS)Narcissistic Monk -Great indie band (GS)Sporty Prius - Worst of the Spice Girls (ACS)Laden and Bravado - 70s duo who opened for Seals n Crofts (ACS)The Bouncers - great band name (ACS)Hurry up and make sense (1) - a good talking heads album (ACS)Appropriate Sombrero - Maxapada’s next band name (Bryan) (ACS)Flirtatious Contrail - great rap name (GS)Jack Johnson - Guy from The White Stripes aka The Black Stripes (ACS)Song TitlesMeatless Mondays - Horrible Bangles song (Show?)Measles and Commuter Trains - Worst Christmas song ever (ACS)White Guys Be Ownin' Everything - Adam's next hit (ACS)Blood On The Grout - John Cougar Mellencamp song (ACS)No Blood In The Peckeroo - Good John Cougar song (ACS)Mellen's Gold - A three disc box set of nothing but John Cougar Mellencamp hits (ACS)Freaks, Retards and Jews - Not a Cher song (ACS)Pedophile Cops - Good Cheap Trick song (ACS)Pig Anus Soup - Favorite Rolling Stones album (Bryan) (ACS)That Dog Don’t Mess With Olga and Natalia Don’t Spit No Mo’ - Sounds like a Mississippi Delta blues song (Bryan) (ACS)Goggles Are For Pussies - Trace Adkins' number one hit (ACAFBSL)Whistle While You Masturbate - The lost Disney song aka "Whistle While You Jerk" (ACS)12 Pack & Dick's Hard - Name of Adam's new album (Gina) (ACS)Blood and Soil - A good Smithereens song (ACS)Pina Colada in Amsterdam - Worst Jimmy Buffet song ever (ACS)Tough Times In The City - Great Nick Gilder song (ACS)I've Got A Hamster In My Scrotum And He's Looking For His Keys - That's a good country song (ACS)Gay Hitler -Great Elvis Costello song (ACS)Tard On The Tool Shed - Good Mellenamp song (AOTH)Condo in Redondo - Sublime song (ADS)Animoji - Band that sung "Obsession" (ACS)People Who Have Lost People - Worst Barbara Streisand song ever (ACS)Tilted Heart - Great Tammy Wynette song (ADS)Yoga wood - Great Beatles song (ACS)Anal cleft - Song from the Sound of Music (ACS)Morgue Mode - Sounds like a guy from Iceland who is a DJ (ACS)I’ve got a Saturday and two friends - great country song (Gina) (ACS)Recipe for Misery (2) - Title of the next Guns N Roses album (ACS)Circling Back To Baldwin - Good name for a country song (ACS)Keistered in Winnipeg - (Bald’s) favorite Willie Nelson song (ACS)Football Players/Athletes/Teams:Legs Akimbo - Wide Receiver (ACS)Feral Katz - Nose Tackle (ACS)L' Brarian Booker - Wide Receiver (ACS)Oscar Buzz - Linebacker (ACS)DeVigorous Lover - Wide Receiver (ACS)Nadir Zenith - Placekicker (ACS)DeGluten Free - Offensive Lineman (ACS)Tangy Mango - Fullback (ACS)N'Farious Plan - (position?) (ACS)Modular Holmes - (position?) (ACS)Fortuitous Bounce - Safety (ACS)Operatin' Thetan - (ACS) Quarterback for the Washington Redskins (ACS)Minority Banks - HOF OLB who died tragically in a car wreck shortly after his HOF induction, a natural athlete, he played option QB in college along with being a stand out member of the track team, and in high school he was captain of the basketball team. Survived by his twin brother Majority Banks, who also played in the league, and daughter Recuser Banks who many believe was the best athlete in the family (ACS)Coach Platitude - "Take a knee son...helmet's not a chair" (ACS)Glendora Bevmo - Mother of DeVigorous Lover and L' Brarian Booker (different fathers, of course) (ACS)Marshall Law - (Allison) (ACS)Orlando Ceeworld - (position?) (ACS)Du Vatine - (position?) (Show?)Raja Slate - Super fast wide-out out of Marshall via LSU (AOTH)Moe Greene - Great corner for the Washington Redskins in the 80’s (ACS)Bronx Defenders - Sounds like a AAA hockey team (RD)Medical Error - Slipped in the draft due to a video being released just prior (ACS)Homeo Stasis (position?) (ACS)Capybara - The greatest name for a major league skipper (ACS)Ejaxico Johnson (position?) (ACS)Radiant Barrier vs. Attic Fan - The worst WWE matchup ever to grace the stage (AOTH)Bamboo Brick - one of the greatest mixed martial artists on the planet (AOTH)Dexter Methorphan - He did not participate in the combines, but his coaches say he can run a 4.3 (Twitter)Bob Jacuzzi - Great point guard for the Celtics aka "THE COOZE" (ACS)Shame Negation - Picked to leave Clemson early and go very early in the draft this year. (ADS)Entertainment Crackers - Another name for the Washington Generals ACSHardibacker - Good name for an inside backer (ACS)Osmosis - Black dude. Forward for the Knicks who might or might not have been traded (ADS)Onus Wilson - NFL draftee (ACS)World Be Mine - Adam’s new basketball name (ACS)Porn Star Names/Terms/Gay Code:Spoodini - (LL)Rocky Stucco - (AOTH)No Can Doo - Backdoor anal queen of China (ACS)Kristallnacht - Worst porn star name in the business (ACS)Madison Avenue (I am Rappaport Podcast)Hero Du Jour (I am Rappaport Podcast)Kindle Fire (ACS)Jackson Hole - Gay porn actor (ACS)Col. Duke Lacrosse - Adam's porn name (LL)Duke Circumference - Adam's gay porn name (ACS)Rich Data - Gay porn actor (Show?)Tom Foolery - Gay porn actor (Show?)Honey Dijon - Great porn star name (Show?)Aids Machete - One of Adam's gay porn names. "Very short stint, I only did 2 weeks with that name, so it was like 41 movies." (ACS)Bryce Canyon - Great gay porn name (ACS)The Italian Coastguard - A gay move. "Let me just start with basic anal, then I'll slide into the Italian Coast Guard." (ACS)Tetanus Gym - Good gay porn name "Who you working with?" "Tetanus Gym." "Oh boy, make sure you're on top" (ACS)Shared A Back Fence - gay slang (ACS)Mea Culpa - Adam's porn name (ACS)Hand Twins - Gay code (ACS)Backscatter - Porn technology (PM)Cajun Tree Climber - Gay code (AOTH)Snow Blower- Gay code (AOTH)Stump Grinder - Gay code (AOTH)Tumbler And Coaster - Adam's gay slang replacement for "top and bottom" (PM)Go For A Bike Ride - Gay code (ACS)Artie Fartie - Adam's porn name from the 80's (ACS)Road Island Ray - Ray's porn name (AOTH)38KKK -A type of porn that comes out of Kentucky (ACS)Tech Screw - A dirty website for geeks (ACS)Bearvalanche - Worst gay move ever (ACS)Wacked Off Pieces Of Cactus - Gay code for gay rough trade (ACS)Brad Nail - Good gay porn name (ADS)Lightning Rod - Good gay porn name for Milo Yiannopplous (ADS)Milk Barn - Another name for Adam's bathroom sink (ACS)Meat Thievery - That's just good gay code (ACS)Hairy Shin - Adam's gay porn name (ACS)Asian Persuasion - Sounds like a good name for a porn series Asian persuasion 16 (ACS)Cock Holster - Good movie series, cock holster 14 (ACS)Celebrity Du Jour - Great porn name (ACS)Europol - Another great porn name (ACS)Roy Wood - Adam's gay porn name (ACS)Tank slapper - Gay slang (Gina) (ACS)Porch Pirate - Gay term (ACS)Mad Chuck - The world's worst name for a gay porn star (AOTH)Sweat lodge - Gay code (ACS)The L.A. Underground - Sounds like a gay bar (M&J)Skin and grin - Gay slang (ACS)Rear Admiral - The name of one of the best bars on west side (ACS)Loaded for bear - Now a gay term (GS)Fruit Of The Year - A porn Dave (Dameshek) starred in (ACS)The Lebanese Comedian - Ace's favorite sex position (ACS)Cockout - When a gay guy doesn't try very hard (ACS)Margana Wood - Porn name (ACS)Hugh Bris - Porn star (RD)Matte Clear - Fondalier’s gay porn name (AOTH)Palatial Estates – A good 80’s fake tittie porn name (AOTH)Cokie Roberts - Great porn name (ACS)Armenian Christmas - An unspeakable sexual act in prison. "Johnny ratted out the white supremacists to the warden, so they gave him an Armenian Christmas" (Show?)Ride The Pine - Gay slang (ADS)Meet Gaze - Gay slang (ACS)Asshole Rider - Gay slang (ACS)Cash Widedick - Ace's porn name if you can call an apple a honey crisp. (ACS)Shanda Lear - Great stripper name (Gina) (ACS)Fiery Cherry - Good porn name (ACS)Jerk the wheel - Code for masturbation (ACS)Giddyup Titties - Gina’s porn name (Gina) (ACS)French astronaut - Great gay slang (ACS)Mr Bandera - gay code (ACS)Beefmato/Clamato - sounds like names of venerial diseases (ACS)Spanner - Australian gay code (ACS)Rocky tenure - Adam’s gay porn name (ACS)The End Game - One of Stormy Daniels movie titles (RD)Room for cream - Great porno title (Gina) (ACS)Pedialyte shower - Worst sexual act ever (Sklar) (ACS)Foot Zunki - Add-on to the Pedialyte shower (ACS)Self rimming sink - gay slang (AOTH)Harvey Mudd - gay bar drink where vermouth and bartender shit is mixed in a goblet (ACS)Barney’s Beanery - ultimate name for a gay bar (ACS)Parallel park both ways - euphemism for being bi (GS)The Big Three - Gerago’s junk (RD)73 - When a fat guy tries to 69 with a chubby prostitute he met at a ham radio convention(ACS)Backlog - Stormy Daniels movie title (Bryan)(ACS)Miscellaneous PeopleTrajectory Hagar - High school kid "heading down the wrong path" in life (ACS)Slick Mouth - Adam's prison name (ACS)Rich Carless - Cool homeless guy name (ACS)Keyless Chuck - Best homeless guy name (ACS)Nasal Ranger - Worst superhero name ever (Gina) (ACS)Krav Maga (2) - Good name for a sheriff (ADS)Hubcap Annie - Horror that hangs out with Keyless Chuck (ACS)Becky Honkington (Allison) (ACS)Monica Chugscock - (Pronounced "Shuggscawk") (ADS)Tyvek DuPont - Best rich guy’s name (AOTH)Mattress - A Model/actress (ACS)Hofmeister Kink - Nazi war criminal who's been in hiding in Brazil for the past 61 years. aka Jake Johnson (ACS)Serpiginous - The world's wimpiest swordsman. Sir Piginous of Wussville (LL)Chick Fil a - Great play-by-play guy for the Warriors from the 70’s (Show?)Peri Menopausal - Best P.I. working the Chicago beat (LL)Whiskey Dick - The neighborhood pedophile in the clown outfit (ACS)Surge - Guy that drives for ÜBER (ACS)Babbling Brook - Great name for a female cattle auctioneer (PM)Terra Firma - Name of the "woman of color" that heckled Adam at a Ventura live show and was removed by force (The Ranker Podcast)Octomom - Great Batman villain (Bryan) (ACS)Larry The Cabinet Guy - Failed Israeli comic…"Don't get 'er done!" (ACS)Rod Blagojevich - Joe Francis' slimy brother who sells above ground pools out of a primered van (ACS)Cockchug Man - The gay superhero in The Village People that wears just all leather (ACS)MEL-ROL- She's one of The Spice Girls (AOTH)Hand Farts - A new comedian Adam had never heard of (ACS)Juan Jeremy - The greatest international film star ever (ACS)Bitchathane Jackson - Good name for a "sista" (ACS)Tobar - Perfect caveman name (ACS)Vroman - A fast moving Roman (ACS)Korn Syrup and Fructose - Women of color who work at the strip club with Jade (stage 4) (ACS)Fred Meyer - Lucy's neighbor (ACS)Kimchi - The Asian flutist (ACS)Pacoima - The mechanic from Taxi (ACS)Dick Salt - NATO Alliance General (ACS)Dick Salt (2) - Manger of the Mariners in the early 70’s (Bryan) (ACS)Caramel And Fudge - Two more African-American prostitutes that lived in the apartment above Adam’s (ACS)Peaches - The whore that lived upstairs (ACS)F. Me Bailey - Greatest lawyer of all time (RD)Agua Caliente - Loves that guy. He does a great John Madden (ACS)Senior Penis - One the most dangerous drug lords to ever work (ADS)Shill Du'Jour - Good Bond secretary name (RD)Brexit Romero - Sounds like an International assassin (ACS)Lugansk - That gay diver who hit his head and gave the whole Canadian team AIDS (ACS)Leak O'rama - A Dutch action star, starred in “Sudden Death” (AOTH)Vaginismus - Great black guy name (ADS)Normcore - Guy that owns Westwood one (ACS)LaTolstoy - Great black guy name (ACS)Shapiro – Artist who is really good at anime. Died in the 60’s but was a real trendsetter (ACS)Chuck Spears – Good name for a racist. “Hey you workin’ with Chuck Spears over at the Klan?” (ACS)Norethindrone - DAG’s Sister (CLL)La Tuskegee - Black airline pilot (ACS)C-clamps – Nickname for Adam’s step-mom. “Ol’ C-clamps locked me out of the house again.” (ACS)Harry Nilsson - (Gary thinks) he does the voices on The Simpsons (ADS)Nutella - Great name for a crazy black woman (ACS)Sia - The perfect person to break up with. Would be perfect if she was dating Jack (hit the road Jack) (ACS)The Ball Catcher - What Adam used to call Ray's ass in junior high (ACFBSL)MOAB - Matt's new nickname (Mother of All Buttholes) (AONTH)Trip Reeb - Great name for a white guy (ACS)Merle Horn - One of the greatest best ropers to ever come down the Pecos (ACS)The Boring Machine - Lynette's name for Adam (ACS)Avocado Hand - The nickname of Eric Clapton's brother (Chet) who works at a Mexican place and is charge of the guacamole (ACS)Bagel Hand - Clapton's Jewish cousin (ACS)Fa-Sheeya (fascia) - A heavy set woman of color that works at the DMV (ACAFBSL)Ghrelin - New AM/PM mascot (ACS)Krav Maga (3) - An Israeli Captain from 1946 (ACS)Cuban Boa - Sounds like a dark skinned trannie (ACS)Gabardine - She's a very chatty woman of color middle-aged and she'll talk your ear off. (ACS)Guy Dudebro - Greatest name ever (AOTH)Otto Warmbier- Simultaneously the greatest and worst beer master brewer name ever (ACS)Leif Geragos - Greatest rocking attorney ever Viking rocker attorney (ACS)Ernest J. Bigot - "I'm just asking....I'm just wanna know...." (ACS)Panzanella - Cobra's full name (ACS)Sheet Metal Nibbler - Great name for Matt the porcelain punisher (AOTH)Big Grenadine - Sounds like a large black neighbor (ACS)Silent gym - Next to Keyless Chuck, best homeless guy name ever (ACS)Nuchilla - Sounds like a black vampire (Theo Von) (ACS)D' poleon - Black Napoleon (ACS)Luke Rockhold - Sounds like a character on The Flintstones (GS)Sissy squat - She was hot (AOTH)Beulah - The town horror (RD)Ronan Farrow - One of the best wheel men in Europe (ACS)Duke Bagg - Comedian Ian Bagg's brother (ACS)Root ball grinder - A horrible term for a bitchy wife (Ruth Ballgrinder and Harriet Mulcher) (Tim Allen) (ACS)Paul Funyun - Just a big dude who likes to have fun. Has a pink ox as a sidekick (ACS)Page/Savage - A great lawyer team (Adam Ray) (ACS)Ivar the Boneless - Ace’s dad’s nickname in high school. aka Jim the spineless (ACS)Bash Worthy - Comic strip's character name/title (ACS)Uncle Tom-bién - Mexican Uncle Tom (ACS)Alist Poon - An Indian exchange student who has cerebral palsy (ACS)Indignant Asswipes - Good name for an improv troupe (Gina) (ACS)Flora in Fauna - two black chicks that work for him (ADS)Cheap - Name of a he/she that literally went under sexual assignment surgery last month (ACS)Heroin (1)(Pronounced Ehr-o-win by JCVD) A character in Lord Of The Rings (Bryan) (ACS)Yersinia pestis - Ace did Celebrity Apprentice with that dude. He won that year (ADS)Morgue Mode - Sounds like a guy from Iceland who is a DJ (ACS)Rachel Bias - Great stripper name (ACS)Buzz Ramjet - Aviation attorney (ACS)Black Cherry - Stripper name Bryan (ACS)Saffron - Sassy black woman in Meg Whitman movie (ACS)Vibranium - a new black kid name from Black Panther (ACS)Bird Nerd - Marvel superhero (ACS)Morning Zoos/DJ's/Radio StationsGum and Condoms - (Show?)Dusty Labia - Adam's handle when he used to do AM Mornings. (ACS)Asscrack and Backsack in the morning with Sludge (LL)Crockpots and Headphones (ACS)Booger and Floor Wax (ACS)Almonds and Water (ACS)Cold Butter And Calves (ADS)Schluter And The Drain - Schluter has a thick Austrian accent , while "The Drain" has a super low voice (AOTH)Ace Rockolla - Just Google "Ace Rockolla Lightning round...." (LL)Fungus and Mold (Show?)Stupid and Petty (Show?)Eunice and Edgar - Bubba the Love Sponge's parents (ACS)Flip Flops and Fanny Packs (ACS)Hairy Shin - Does a KCRE show in the weekends (ACS)Deep Bra Grooves - Should be a Sirius XM station Channel 248, C+ and above! (ACS)Andy and Opie - Great Radio Show (ACS)QuietRock - Sounds like an easy listening rock station (AOTH)Quiet Crush - A good easy listening radio station (ACS)The Tool Box - SiriusXM took tune station aka KTOL (ACS)Ray's Enema Antics - New podcast on Carolla Digital (Bryan)(ACS)Doug Gets Blown While He Eats Pudding - Doug Benson's next podcast (ACS)Cat Packer - Used to do mornings with her brother, Fudge (ACS)Duke and Shinola - good morning show team (ACS)PlacesBoobville - (LL)Pedoph Isle aka Pedophile Island - Island where are all the pedophiles are sent to live. (Also a TV show/movie idea) (LL)Lil' Lord Fauntleroy’s Academy for Albino Hemophiliacs - Drew's childhood school (LL)Doesntexistizcan - Where presidential candidate Platitude's grandfather was from (ACS)Boga Raton - The world's worst resort spot (Show?)Meat Yard - Great name for a gay bar (ACS)Mister Fister's - Adam's all-time top name for a gay bar (ACS)Sub-Par - Worst name for a submarine sandwich shop (Show?)Queen Mary - Great name for a tranny bar (ACS)NuvaRing - A German racetrack. "The new Nissan GTR turned it in 7:21, faster than the Corvette." (Show?)Louis Pasteur Middle School (ACS)Helm’s Deep - World's first gay bar bakery (ACS)Kal Penn - One of the best sounding names to get an engineering degree from (ACS)Alaska State Motto - Love fishing but I hate your kids? Alaska! (PM)Duke University - John Wayne's college (ACS)Planned Possumhood - Planned Parenthood in Arkansas (ACS)Fruit Stand - Great name for a gay bar (ACS)Poo Poo City - Where Charles Fletcher Loomis' house is located (ACS)Blood Bank - Great name for a check cashing place in the hood (ACS)Bass Manor - Great name for a gay bar (ACS)The Dead C - Sounds like the worst name for a lesbian bar ever (ACS)Wood Bar - Good name for a gay bar (ACS)Ghost Load - Ride at Calico Ghost Town (ADS)Nasacort - Country club for Jewish folks where they play tennis at (ADS)L.A. HOTT (1) - An 80's bar with an outdoor door seating area (ACS)Fairy Wings - Good name for a bar on the west side (ACS)Second Hand/First World - Store that sells rich whitey’s high end stuff (ACS)The Lance Hunter - Perfect name for a gay bar (Dumb People Town)Pervert Park - Theo Vaughn grew up there (ACS)Big Sur - Great name for a big and tall shop (Show?)Studio Centric - Sounds like a Utopia. Between Valley Village and Sherman Oaks (AOTH)Asstard - Thor came from that planet (ACS)Grand Entrance - Great name for a gay bar (AOTH)Thermopolis - Where the Bun Boy is (ACS)The Turkish Embassy - Gay bar (ACS)Low Tide - Gay code for boner in the rear view mirror (ACS)Corumption - On the way to Vegas, where Heidi Fleiss lives with her macaws (ACS)C.C. Fichens - Sounds like a pretzel stand (Gina) (ACS)Timpani Barn - where to get timpani to go, has three big Mexicans in the kitchen (ACS)Heroin (2)(Pronounced Ehr-o-win by JCVD) The health food store in Venice (ACS)Pocket Passers - Next to Mister Fister’s (Gina) (ACS)MiscellaneousCleaning The Pink Turtle - Bryan's name for pleasuring oneself (ACS)Analingus - A new type of breath mint (LL)The Milk Of Arthritic Goats - A rabbi's curse: "May you suckle at the teet of the milk of arthritic goat!!!" (ACS)Carbon Dating - A black dating website (ACS)RU486 - Vanity plate for a guy who runs an abortion clinic (ADS)Jet Green - Amsterdam's Airlines (ACS)Stromer, Oldhafer and Carolla - World's worst law firm (AOTH)Ira Carolla - Sounds like an affliction "Oh my Ira Carolla's acting up" (ACS)Sawjay - Sounds French...gay word for sausage. "I was strokin' this dude’s sawjay" (ACS)Smokeless Cigarette - Name for Dr. Drew's honker after his prostate surgery (ADS)El Niño - Name of "Sinn" strip club DJ's cock (ACS)Blue Man - Crazy hairdresser's macaw who doesn't judge (PM)Lucia - An Italian moped (ACS)American Jewish World Service - A van that's begging to be shot at (ACS)E-aye? - Canadian version of EBay (ACS)Sweatpants Lesbian - What Adam would be. An in-between lesbian. Not a lipstick lesbian, not a butch dyke (ACS)SuckStrong - Bill Clinton's bracelet (ACS)Gaybus - Gay and bogus (ACS)Flappy Bird - The most offensive name for the vagina (ACS)G8 (Summit) - The Pontiac that Oprah gave away on her show (ACS)Oracle A The Delphi - Big new startup company (ADS)Crewkakke - A type of sweater (ACS)The Flying Dutchman - Great name for an Amsterdam airlines (ACS)Cleaning My Chain - Euphemism for beating off (ACS)Awesome Town - A gathering of three or more polar bears (ACS)Avocado - The Greek word for nut sack (ACS)Doucherette - A gum/patch that douchebags chew/use (ACS)Urban Milling -Black guys standing around (AOTH)Synesthesia - When you eat your own hair (ACS)Tuck Rule - When a guy pretends he's a chick and stands in front of the mirror (ACS)My #2 Pencil Is Out Of Lead - Another term for erectile dysfunction (ACS)Float A Bond - When a politician farts (RD)Vaginismus - black people's holiday, accompanied with a lot of ceremonial garb (ADS)Vaseline and Gauze - Elizabeth Taylor's new scent (ACS)Jewber - A drunk on a 10-speed (ACS)Chickpea - What Gina does when we camp (ACS)Oscar Squad (2) - Bad gay code (ACS)Airbus - Worst name for an aircraft. Sounds like “air donkey” (AOTH)Shailene Woodley - Sounds like the most fantastical verb/adverb combo. “I want to Shailene Woodley through a field of poppies with you” (Gina) (Twitter)Asshole Rider (2) - Worst piece of exercise equipment Vinnie’s ever endorsed (ACS)Diario La Prensa - Stealer of the jersey in Spanish (ACS)The Sicilian Fly Swatter - Sounds like a WWF move (Gina) (ACS)Jellyfish - Sounds like something your grandpa would buy for you at the mall (ACS)Fruit Fly - More politically correct term for fag hag (Show?)Jewgling - When a Jew "Googles" their symptoms (ACS)Tavares - David Wild's boner medicine (ACS)Jew -Over - A mulligan from a barmitzva. "Uh, I misread that...can I get a Jew-over?" (ACS)Ossified - That's a Don King word, there (ACS)Zero for Cecil - Worst charity ever (Bald Bryan) (ACS)A++ - A bra that Gina will never see (ACS)Joycelyn - A good name for Curly from the Three Stooges to say (ACS)Phallisee - Latin for "to see the penis" (ADS)Coffee Nap - Euphemism for pooping in your pants (ACS)USS Monitor - Doesn't sound like a ship of war, sounds like a night nurse (ACS)Dotard - A skirt a man wears (ACS)Wilding- Something derogatory that takes place in public pools in certain counties (ACS)Caveat - Latin for shitting on Adam's point (ADS)Festiva - Sounds like a boner medicine (ACS)Depeche Mode - French for “who dealt it?” (ADS)Beefy Clutch – The purse Gina thought Lady Gaga took to the Emmy’s (ACS)Sig Sauer - Something you would yell at Oktoberfest before downing a stiff stein of stout (ACS)Jeans day – Sounds like the special day for your special need son Gene, to raise money (ACS)Wilding - What takes place in public pools in certain counties (GS)4F - Can’t/won’t be eligible for the draft (ACS)Groupie - a kind of fish (ACS)The African chick - Horrible name for a boat (ACS)Inclusion rider - Snowboard for retarded kids (ACS)The Urethra - Bad name for a car (ACS)Mercury retrograde - when you take your index finger and shove it under your sack before you blow, and you belch it up later (ACS)UEFA - Transsexuals playing soccer with a balled up maxi pad (GS)Missed Connections- The worst airline ever (ACS)Carollo - Sounds like a Tool you’d use rarely (ACS)Brembo - that Mexican food company that makes that bread (Matt) (ACS)Futon - Chinese for bear trap (ACS)Food/DrinksDeer Bits - A venison cereal. Made of frosted deer flakes (Show?)Coco Chanel - Nestlé’s newest coffee flavor (ACS)Honey Dicks - Best cereal name ever (ACS)Dawson's Beard - A pudding flavor Ace saw at Whole Foods (ACS)Mighty Mutts - Worst breakfast cereal ever (ADS)Chillax - A cinnamon based drink from "Hector's" country (ACS)Black Dick - An English desert (ACS)Tardy Digression - Sounds like a finger food..."would you like another tardy digression?" "No, I'm saving room for the main meal" (IFYWABC)Double Bird Strike - Mixed drink created by Ace and Teresa. Made with Grey Goose, Wild Turkey, a splash of Canadian Club, and a splash of Hudson River water (ACS)GAYtorade - A sports drink for gay people, because they lose essential body fluids (ACS)University of Illinois At Urbana Champaign - Sounds like a carbonated drink for black people (ACS)Flinch Fuck - Part of a nutritious breakfast, and a healthy relationship (ADS)Phantom Punch - Something Bill Cosby gave his lady friends (ACS)Pansy Sauce - Goes good with some shrimp (ADS)Tilted Pillar - Kick ass IPA (AOTH)Shaver - A good name for a miniature pastrami sandwich (Cousin Sal Show)GPA - Something they add to children's cereal (ACS)Stellwell's - A new low fat snack cracker (ACS)Conchata Ferrell - A great cheese/unwanted cat (ACS)Poopwell's - One of the worst snacks Nabisco has ever put their name on (ACS)Belldini – Latest Taco Bell offering (ACS)Fuzzy Zoeller – Zima with a jigger of peach schnapps (ACS)Millennial Malaise - A sweet honey dipping sauce (ADS)Jelani Cobb - Sounds like an Indian dish (Gina) (ACS)Air Doodle - The very worst Super Bowl snack on the planet (ACS)Faygala - Jewish sports drink (ACS)Stroke Cane - Sounds like some sugary treat, mixed with a reach around (ACS)The Silence Breakers (2) - good name for a mint (ACS)Lesbian Squirt - Sponsor of the Dinah Shore Classic (ACS)Preemptive gay strike - Worst video game ever (ADS)TV Shows/MoviesCunt du' Jour - A great Bond villain name (ACS)Coffee and Donuts - (Charlie Coffee III and Johnny Donetti) Johnny's a tough street wise cop whose jive talking and plays by his own rules and Charlie's super uptight (LL)Pedoph Isle (aka) Pedophile Island - All pedophiles are sent to live on an isolated island, and a 747 full of Boy Scouts crash lands there and they have to fight to survive (Also a place) (ACS)Anus and Eyeball - Buddy cop TV show duo (ACS)Pussy Pioneer - John Candy's last movie (ACS)Red Velvet - Made up movie character Clown played by Paul Giamatti. "Was secret service, and someone died on his watch. Now he's takin to clownin'." Wears a red velvet clown outfit. (ACS)Destination Of The Semen - (Adam Ray) A movie Harrison Ford passed on twice (ACS)Gay Eye - Movie where Adam plays Buddy McKlan, a racist homophobic mechanic who is blinded in a freak hot transmission fluid accident. He gets the donor eyes from a gay guy who perished on a moped accident in Antigua. Co-starring Larry the Cable Guy as his best friend. (Co-written by Bryan Cranston) (ACS)Grinders - Sitcom where Jon Gruden moves in with Johnny Manziel (ACS)Squishy Red River - Movie that started John Wayne (Show?)Gusset And Cable - Perfect Cop buddy duo team (AOTH)Just One Of The Gays - Stars Shia LaBeouf (ACS)Hard Impact - Sounds like a Van Damme movie from the 90's (ACS)Hammer Pants And Ice - Worst cop detective duo from the 80's (ACS)Living With The Kilowatts - Adam's new animated series where they just leave toaster ovens on all day (ACS)Keep Calm And Rape A Lot - Worst Monty Python film ever (ACS)Medical Mishaps - New show Dave Coulier and Tawny Kitaen could host (ACS)Roaming With Bison - Another great Bill Murray movie (ACS)Gainesville Florida Financial Planner - Sounds like a Saturday Night Live skit (ACS)Blame the Bee Gees - Adam's next documentary (ACS)Adam Knees Your Dad In The Nuts - Adam's new game show (ACS)Navigeddon - Terrorists take over all of the GPS systems of cars, and send them careening into the Grand Canyon (ACS)Rings Of Honor - Terrorists take over Olympic training facility in Colorado Springs, and the athletes have to use their individual skills to escape. (Cameo by Randy Couture as the salty old coach) (ACS)Endless Time/Ample Time For Backup - Adam's new Netflix series (ACS)Tarred n' Feathered - Buddy flick starring a retarded guy and an Indian chief (Show?)Mr. Will Doo And Can Doo - PSA Motivational cartoon bathroom characters Will Doo (Played by Will Arnette) and Can Doo is shaped like a toilet. Filmed in kitschy Clutch Cargo style animation (ADS)Robot Lawyer - Great Phil Hartman bit (ACS)Umpire News Network - Adam's channel with umpires reporting. Unbiased reporting (ACS)Sofa Tard - New CW show coming soon (Matt) (AOTH)Junior Fantasy Island - Show where kids of reckless parents are shipped off to live with Bill Cosby and Felicia Rashad (ADS)2 And A Half Denali's - Hasn't been same since Sheen left (ACS)So Kanye - Sitcom from the 90's (ACS)Ridicuopothy - Sounds like a Mike Judge movie (ADS)Master Buck - One of John Candy's most controversial movies (ACS)LA HOTT (1) - An 80’s bar with an outdoor door seating area (ACS)Mother Hitler - Coming to TNT. Starring Patrick Swayze's bother, Don (ACS)Sink and Bounce - Movie about roller boogie from the 80's, starred Lil' Bow Wow (ACS)The Debs - A made up CW network show where you just put all the hot chicks in Hollywood (ACS)The Origin Story Of AIDS - Worst Marvel movie ever (Bryan)(ACS)Everybody Hates Vinnie - Horrible sitcom (ACS)Chick Clan - Good movie title (ACS)Condo in Redondo - Best movie I ever did (ADS)Red Lobsteria - New show Dr. Drew was talking about where African Americans form their own country (ACS)Earthquake rehab - Reality show Dr. drew seismic expert and a civil engineer come together (Rainn Wilson) (ACS)Rooster Jones - Great John Wayne movie. Super Fly meets True Grit (ACS)Ernest Bigot goes to..... (ACS)Nickels On The Job - First and only Jewish gum shoe on the job. ABC, Friday nights, 10:00 p.m. (ADS)Solicitor General - Great Danny Kaye movie (RD)Disjointed - Lorena Bobbitt biopic (ADS)Habib and Company - Horrible children's show (MS)Bobby's Room - Howie Mandel animated project from the 90's (ACS)Page/Savage - Great cop duo show from the ‘80’s (Adam Ray) (ACS)Paper Asshole - Great Tatum O’Neal film (ACS)L.A. HOTT (2) - Failed Steven Bochco series pilot (ACS)Pieces Of String Too Small To Use - Lena Dunham film from the late 90’s (ACS)Oscar Squad - New Marvel Movie (Gina) (ACS)Cortron/Melamine - Transformers (Gina) (ACS)Anoscope - Worst way to see a movie (ADS)Practical Rapist - New SNL character (Gina) (ACS)Superfoot - Worst Marvel movie ever (Bryan) (ACS)Celebrity Food Chain - Would be a great show (Jeff Cesario) (ACS)Backsack and Anus - Worst cop duo ever (RS)Korean moyle - ABC’s next sitcom (Jeff) ACSNanny Huntin ‘with Ted Nugent - Great reality show I’d watch (ACS)Progressive pope - New sitcom (Gina) ACSNick Mancuso: Construction Fluffer - New TV Show (AONT)Rush Blitzer - Adam’s character from his movie, “Snapper” (BSR)Books/Coffee Table BooksDade County Black Prom, 1985 (ACS)Here Are The Pajamas We Picture You In (ACS)Three Shitty Homes, One Washing Machine, Zero Dryers - Title of Adam's new book (Ray) (AOTH)Chapstick And Batteries - Title of Adam's next bestselling book (ACS)Who The Fuck Put Their Sombrero on My Keys? – Title of Adam’s next book (ACS)Cunt With A Grunt - Adam's favorite Dr. Seuss book (PM)You'll Never See A Cockroach Jog (PM)Kemo Skinny Calves - Adam's new children's book (ADS)You're Dyslexic And I'm Dumb - Adam and John Popper's collaborative next book (ACS)I Get It If You’re GWAR - Adam's next book (ACS)Bulk Magazine - Costco magazine that Jimmy Kimmell graced the cover of twice (ACS)Do You Have To Take Your Top Off To Dye Your Pubes, Drew? (LL)Glamping With Moriah - Adam's new book (ACS)From The Mouths of Babes (Hot Chicks Not Babies) (ACS)(The) Sweet Spot - Adam's next book (Bryan) (ACS)I Thought Things Would Be Better When I Was Rich (ACS)Radio Station Kitchen (ACS)Post-it Notes In Radio Station Kitchens (ACS)Comedy Club Green Rooms And The Sofas That Were Not Made For Them (ACS)Jethro, the Mexican Jew - A great children's book (Gina) (ACS)Professor and the Construction Worker -The worst children's book ever (ACS)Willie and the Weed - Good name for a children's book (ACS)What Black People Think White People Complain About (ACS)Everyone Eventually Becomes The Man (ACS)Recipe for Misery (1) - Name Of Adam’s next book (ACS)In Defense Of Black Face - Adam’s next book (ACS)Hurry Up And Make Sense (2) - Biography title of the Talking Heads (ACS)Native American NamesChief Thunderbear (LL)Dances With Cocks (ACS)Dances With Lipstick (ACS)Ol' Urethra Windows (ACS)Oxnard - Indian name meaning the balls of a bull (ACS)V/P NamesAbsorbent Rag - Good name for T's V (ACS)Hurt Locker - Another name for T's V (ACS)Judge's Mansion - Another name for T's GCmarket.com - Another name for T's V (ACS)City of Industry - Another name for T's V (ACS)Dutch Mook - Another name for T's V (ACS)s VNo Safe Spaces - Great name for T's V (ACS)Hobo Stove - Another name for A's V (ACS)Sausage Grinder - Another name for A's V (ACS)Dixville Notch - Another name for G's V (ACS)Snake River Canyon - Another name for G's V (ACS)Dakota Access Pipeline - Another name for G's V (ACS)The Holidome - Another name for G’s V (ACS)Discovery Bay - Great name for G's V (ACS)B.O. Box - Great name for G's V (ACS)Sea bag - Good name for G's V (ACS)El Portal - Great name for G's V (ACS)Harry Belafonte - Adam's name for his junk, if he were a woman (Show?)Top Gear - Another name for Adam’s junk (ACS)El Gordo/King Taco - Good name for G’s V (ACS)Submitted June 02, 2018 at 02:21PM by Texas1971 https://www.reddit.com/AdamCarolla/comments/8o2hxt/carollaisms\\\\\\_june/?utm\\\\\\_source=iftttvia /AdamCarollaSubmitted June 02, 2018 at 02:48PM by peterboykin https://www.reddit.com/MagaFirstNews/comments/8o2oh9/carollaisms\\\\\_june/?utm\\\\\_source=iftttvia /MagaFirstNewsSubmitted June 02, 2018 at 05:23PM by peterboykin https://www.reddit.com/MagaFirstNews/comments/8o3pnj/carollaisms\\\\_june/?utm\\\\_source=iftttvia /MagaFirstNewsSubmitted June 02, 2018 at 07:18PM by peterboykin https://www.reddit.com/MagaFirstNews/comments/8o4g7v/carollaisms\\\_june/?utm\\\_source=iftttvia /MagaFirstNewsSubmitted June 02, 2018 at 08:13PM by peterboykin https://www.reddit.com/MagaFirstNews/comments/8o4scx/carollaisms\\_june/?utm\\_source=iftttvia /MagaFirstNews
Submitted June 02, 2018 at 10:08PM by peterboykin https://www.reddit.com/MagaFirstNews/comments/8o5gh3/carollaisms\_june/?utm\_source=ifttt
via /MagaFirstNews
submitted by peterboykin to MagaFirstNews [link] [comments]


2018.06.03 04:08 peterboykin Carollaisms J(une)

Carollaisms J(une)
Carollaisms J(une)Carollaisms J(une)Carollaisms J(une)Carollaisms J(une)Carollaisms (June)Band Names/Rap StarsMitt Romney and the One Percenters (ACS)ManAyz - Rap star (LL)D'Bagz - Rap star (LL)Maxi Pad - An all-girl band that knows how to rock (LL)Dick Tingle - One of the best blues men in the business (Show?)Lynette and the Lackeys (ACS)Straw Hat and the Bowties - Jerry Springer's dixieland band who plays at the Knott's Berry Farm Good Time Theater (ACS)Gut Fluffer (ACS)Johnny Beaumont and The Legionnaires - All wear matching powder blue tuxedoes (ACS)Automatic Vaginismus – Great band name (LL)Dissuade/D’ Suede - Rappeproducer of Kanye/one of Kim's ex beaus (ACS)Starchy Deuce - Band that should be produced by D' Suede (ACS)Narthex - (ACS)Epileptic Declawed Hamster - That is a helluva punk band right there (ACS)Loretta Lynch - Country singer who sang "Stand By Your Man" (ACS)The Areolas - Covered an Eagles song in the ‘90s (ACS)Fleece and Flannel - One of the best lesbian acoustic duos you will ever see (ACS)3 Chainz - Rap star (ACS)Blues Squatter - Adam's dad’s band name (ACS)Tampon Kayak - One of Seattle's greatest, but least heard of indie bands (ACS)Jizz Grenade (LL)Dryer Fire - Hot indie band name (ACS)Iranian Revolutionary Guard - Prince's backup band (ACS)Rape Kit - Name of Adam's band from high school (ACS)Nog Bong - A band Adam was in in high school (ACS)Bum Blazer – Adam’s band in high school (ACS)White Trash Kimchi - Another good band name (Bald Bryan) (ACS)White Noise - Adam's rap name (ADS)Promethazine - Lil Wayne's sister (ADS)Light Rail - Great Rap name (ADS)Danny In The Joint - Good indie band name (ACS)Anal Cleft - One of the worst reggae singers to leave Jamaica (ACS)Anal Cleft and the Taints - Great reggae group (ACS)MEL-ROL - One of The Spice Girls (AOTH)D'bris - Great Rap name (ACS)Cisgender - A militant female rapper....for the ladies (ACS)Krav Maga (1) - Country singing Jew (ACS)Lynette and Paulette - Sounds like a singing duo from the 60's (RD)Nuts In The Sink - Name of Ray’s new band (Ray) (AOTH)SubDude - Pete Holmes' rap name (ACS)Ray And The Enemas - Blues singer and his backup band (ADS)Yakov Crutchfield - He has a show in Branson (ADS)Mac 18 - Adam’s favorite rapper (RD)Tremble Lean – Adam’s rap name (ACBSL)Sticker Back – Worst band out of Canada ever (ACS)Pennywise and Pound Foolish - A band from the ‘90's (RD)Strawberry Shortcake's Neti Pot - Great band name (Twitter)Puffy Elon Musk - Worst rapper ever (ACS)Pantera Club at Laguna Seca (Twitter)Savage Body Attack - New wave romantic band Ace was in when he was 19 (FBL)Jumping Jazzy Jews - Jeff Goldblum's jazz band (ACS)Snore Cherry - Great band name (ACS)Pat Benatard - Pat Benatar cover band (ACS)Rancid Nuts - Good band name (ACS)Gary And The Knotholes - Good band name (AOTH)Tampon Canoe - Good indie band (ACS)One Erection - A good boy band (ACS)Flushin' Dew - A good country duo (ACS)Armo Jeweler - Great band name (RD)Radon - (Lynette thinks) there a Whitesnake cover-band (ACS)The Taste Of Ace - Great band name (ACS)King Grape and the Raisinettes (GS)Concord Grape and the Raisinettes (GS)Gary Taco - Love that band (ACS)The Silence Breakers (2) - Good punk band (Gina) (ACS)Daddy’s Got A Dually – Good country song (ACS)Dip Curtain - Good indie band (ACS)Crystal Lobbyists - Sounds like a great techno band (ACS)Narcissistic Monk -Great indie band (GS)Sporty Prius - Worst of the Spice Girls (ACS)Laden and Bravado - 70s duo who opened for Seals n Crofts (ACS)The Bouncers - great band name (ACS)Hurry up and make sense (1) - a good talking heads album (ACS)Appropriate Sombrero - Maxapada’s next band name (Bryan) (ACS)Flirtatious Contrail - great rap name (GS)Jack Johnson - Guy from The White Stripes aka The Black Stripes (ACS)Song TitlesMeatless Mondays - Horrible Bangles song (Show?)Measles and Commuter Trains - Worst Christmas song ever (ACS)White Guys Be Ownin' Everything - Adam's next hit (ACS)Blood On The Grout - John Cougar Mellencamp song (ACS)No Blood In The Peckeroo - Good John Cougar song (ACS)Mellen's Gold - A three disc box set of nothing but John Cougar Mellencamp hits (ACS)Freaks, Retards and Jews - Not a Cher song (ACS)Pedophile Cops - Good Cheap Trick song (ACS)Pig Anus Soup - Favorite Rolling Stones album (Bryan) (ACS)That Dog Don’t Mess With Olga and Natalia Don’t Spit No Mo’ - Sounds like a Mississippi Delta blues song (Bryan) (ACS)Goggles Are For Pussies - Trace Adkins' number one hit (ACAFBSL)Whistle While You Masturbate - The lost Disney song aka "Whistle While You Jerk" (ACS)12 Pack & Dick's Hard - Name of Adam's new album (Gina) (ACS)Blood and Soil - A good Smithereens song (ACS)Pina Colada in Amsterdam - Worst Jimmy Buffet song ever (ACS)Tough Times In The City - Great Nick Gilder song (ACS)I've Got A Hamster In My Scrotum And He's Looking For His Keys - That's a good country song (ACS)Gay Hitler -Great Elvis Costello song (ACS)Tard On The Tool Shed - Good Mellenamp song (AOTH)Condo in Redondo - Sublime song (ADS)Animoji - Band that sung "Obsession" (ACS)People Who Have Lost People - Worst Barbara Streisand song ever (ACS)Tilted Heart - Great Tammy Wynette song (ADS)Yoga wood - Great Beatles song (ACS)Anal cleft - Song from the Sound of Music (ACS)Morgue Mode - Sounds like a guy from Iceland who is a DJ (ACS)I’ve got a Saturday and two friends - great country song (Gina) (ACS)Recipe for Misery (2) - Title of the next Guns N Roses album (ACS)Circling Back To Baldwin - Good name for a country song (ACS)Keistered in Winnipeg - (Bald’s) favorite Willie Nelson song (ACS)Football Players/Athletes/Teams:Legs Akimbo - Wide Receiver (ACS)Feral Katz - Nose Tackle (ACS)L' Brarian Booker - Wide Receiver (ACS)Oscar Buzz - Linebacker (ACS)DeVigorous Lover - Wide Receiver (ACS)Nadir Zenith - Placekicker (ACS)DeGluten Free - Offensive Lineman (ACS)Tangy Mango - Fullback (ACS)N'Farious Plan - (position?) (ACS)Modular Holmes - (position?) (ACS)Fortuitous Bounce - Safety (ACS)Operatin' Thetan - (ACS) Quarterback for the Washington Redskins (ACS)Minority Banks - HOF OLB who died tragically in a car wreck shortly after his HOF induction, a natural athlete, he played option QB in college along with being a stand out member of the track team, and in high school he was captain of the basketball team. Survived by his twin brother Majority Banks, who also played in the league, and daughter Recuser Banks who many believe was the best athlete in the family (ACS)Coach Platitude - "Take a knee son...helmet's not a chair" (ACS)Glendora Bevmo - Mother of DeVigorous Lover and L' Brarian Booker (different fathers, of course) (ACS)Marshall Law - (Allison) (ACS)Orlando Ceeworld - (position?) (ACS)Du Vatine - (position?) (Show?)Raja Slate - Super fast wide-out out of Marshall via LSU (AOTH)Moe Greene - Great corner for the Washington Redskins in the 80’s (ACS)Bronx Defenders - Sounds like a AAA hockey team (RD)Medical Error - Slipped in the draft due to a video being released just prior (ACS)Homeo Stasis (position?) (ACS)Capybara - The greatest name for a major league skipper (ACS)Ejaxico Johnson (position?) (ACS)Radiant Barrier vs. Attic Fan - The worst WWE matchup ever to grace the stage (AOTH)Bamboo Brick - one of the greatest mixed martial artists on the planet (AOTH)Dexter Methorphan - He did not participate in the combines, but his coaches say he can run a 4.3 (Twitter)Bob Jacuzzi - Great point guard for the Celtics aka "THE COOZE" (ACS)Shame Negation - Picked to leave Clemson early and go very early in the draft this year. (ADS)Entertainment Crackers - Another name for the Washington Generals ACSHardibacker - Good name for an inside backer (ACS)Osmosis - Black dude. Forward for the Knicks who might or might not have been traded (ADS)Onus Wilson - NFL draftee (ACS)World Be Mine - Adam’s new basketball name (ACS)Porn Star Names/Terms/Gay Code:Spoodini - (LL)Rocky Stucco - (AOTH)No Can Doo - Backdoor anal queen of China (ACS)Kristallnacht - Worst porn star name in the business (ACS)Madison Avenue (I am Rappaport Podcast)Hero Du Jour (I am Rappaport Podcast)Kindle Fire (ACS)Jackson Hole - Gay porn actor (ACS)Col. Duke Lacrosse - Adam's porn name (LL)Duke Circumference - Adam's gay porn name (ACS)Rich Data - Gay porn actor (Show?)Tom Foolery - Gay porn actor (Show?)Honey Dijon - Great porn star name (Show?)Aids Machete - One of Adam's gay porn names. "Very short stint, I only did 2 weeks with that name, so it was like 41 movies." (ACS)Bryce Canyon - Great gay porn name (ACS)The Italian Coastguard - A gay move. "Let me just start with basic anal, then I'll slide into the Italian Coast Guard." (ACS)Tetanus Gym - Good gay porn name "Who you working with?" "Tetanus Gym." "Oh boy, make sure you're on top" (ACS)Shared A Back Fence - gay slang (ACS)Mea Culpa - Adam's porn name (ACS)Hand Twins - Gay code (ACS)Backscatter - Porn technology (PM)Cajun Tree Climber - Gay code (AOTH)Snow Blower- Gay code (AOTH)Stump Grinder - Gay code (AOTH)Tumbler And Coaster - Adam's gay slang replacement for "top and bottom" (PM)Go For A Bike Ride - Gay code (ACS)Artie Fartie - Adam's porn name from the 80's (ACS)Road Island Ray - Ray's porn name (AOTH)38KKK -A type of porn that comes out of Kentucky (ACS)Tech Screw - A dirty website for geeks (ACS)Bearvalanche - Worst gay move ever (ACS)Wacked Off Pieces Of Cactus - Gay code for gay rough trade (ACS)Brad Nail - Good gay porn name (ADS)Lightning Rod - Good gay porn name for Milo Yiannopplous (ADS)Milk Barn - Another name for Adam's bathroom sink (ACS)Meat Thievery - That's just good gay code (ACS)Hairy Shin - Adam's gay porn name (ACS)Asian Persuasion - Sounds like a good name for a porn series Asian persuasion 16 (ACS)Cock Holster - Good movie series, cock holster 14 (ACS)Celebrity Du Jour - Great porn name (ACS)Europol - Another great porn name (ACS)Roy Wood - Adam's gay porn name (ACS)Tank slapper - Gay slang (Gina) (ACS)Porch Pirate - Gay term (ACS)Mad Chuck - The world's worst name for a gay porn star (AOTH)Sweat lodge - Gay code (ACS)The L.A. Underground - Sounds like a gay bar (M&J)Skin and grin - Gay slang (ACS)Rear Admiral - The name of one of the best bars on west side (ACS)Loaded for bear - Now a gay term (GS)Fruit Of The Year - A porn Dave (Dameshek) starred in (ACS)The Lebanese Comedian - Ace's favorite sex position (ACS)Cockout - When a gay guy doesn't try very hard (ACS)Margana Wood - Porn name (ACS)Hugh Bris - Porn star (RD)Matte Clear - Fondalier’s gay porn name (AOTH)Palatial Estates – A good 80’s fake tittie porn name (AOTH)Cokie Roberts - Great porn name (ACS)Armenian Christmas - An unspeakable sexual act in prison. "Johnny ratted out the white supremacists to the warden, so they gave him an Armenian Christmas" (Show?)Ride The Pine - Gay slang (ADS)Meet Gaze - Gay slang (ACS)Asshole Rider - Gay slang (ACS)Cash Widedick - Ace's porn name if you can call an apple a honey crisp. (ACS)Shanda Lear - Great stripper name (Gina) (ACS)Fiery Cherry - Good porn name (ACS)Jerk the wheel - Code for masturbation (ACS)Giddyup Titties - Gina’s porn name (Gina) (ACS)French astronaut - Great gay slang (ACS)Mr Bandera - gay code (ACS)Beefmato/Clamato - sounds like names of venerial diseases (ACS)Spanner - Australian gay code (ACS)Rocky tenure - Adam’s gay porn name (ACS)The End Game - One of Stormy Daniels movie titles (RD)Room for cream - Great porno title (Gina) (ACS)Pedialyte shower - Worst sexual act ever (Sklar) (ACS)Foot Zunki - Add-on to the Pedialyte shower (ACS)Self rimming sink - gay slang (AOTH)Harvey Mudd - gay bar drink where vermouth and bartender shit is mixed in a goblet (ACS)Barney’s Beanery - ultimate name for a gay bar (ACS)Parallel park both ways - euphemism for being bi (GS)The Big Three - Gerago’s junk (RD)73 - When a fat guy tries to 69 with a chubby prostitute he met at a ham radio convention(ACS)Backlog - Stormy Daniels movie title (Bryan)(ACS)Miscellaneous PeopleTrajectory Hagar - High school kid "heading down the wrong path" in life (ACS)Slick Mouth - Adam's prison name (ACS)Rich Carless - Cool homeless guy name (ACS)Keyless Chuck - Best homeless guy name (ACS)Nasal Ranger - Worst superhero name ever (Gina) (ACS)Krav Maga (2) - Good name for a sheriff (ADS)Hubcap Annie - Horror that hangs out with Keyless Chuck (ACS)Becky Honkington (Allison) (ACS)Monica Chugscock - (Pronounced "Shuggscawk") (ADS)Tyvek DuPont - Best rich guy’s name (AOTH)Mattress - A Model/actress (ACS)Hofmeister Kink - Nazi war criminal who's been in hiding in Brazil for the past 61 years. aka Jake Johnson (ACS)Serpiginous - The world's wimpiest swordsman. Sir Piginous of Wussville (LL)Chick Fil a - Great play-by-play guy for the Warriors from the 70’s (Show?)Peri Menopausal - Best P.I. working the Chicago beat (LL)Whiskey Dick - The neighborhood pedophile in the clown outfit (ACS)Surge - Guy that drives for ÜBER (ACS)Babbling Brook - Great name for a female cattle auctioneer (PM)Terra Firma - Name of the "woman of color" that heckled Adam at a Ventura live show and was removed by force (The Ranker Podcast)Octomom - Great Batman villain (Bryan) (ACS)Larry The Cabinet Guy - Failed Israeli comic…"Don't get 'er done!" (ACS)Rod Blagojevich - Joe Francis' slimy brother who sells above ground pools out of a primered van (ACS)Cockchug Man - The gay superhero in The Village People that wears just all leather (ACS)MEL-ROL- She's one of The Spice Girls (AOTH)Hand Farts - A new comedian Adam had never heard of (ACS)Juan Jeremy - The greatest international film star ever (ACS)Bitchathane Jackson - Good name for a "sista" (ACS)Tobar - Perfect caveman name (ACS)Vroman - A fast moving Roman (ACS)Korn Syrup and Fructose - Women of color who work at the strip club with Jade (stage 4) (ACS)Fred Meyer - Lucy's neighbor (ACS)Kimchi - The Asian flutist (ACS)Pacoima - The mechanic from Taxi (ACS)Dick Salt - NATO Alliance General (ACS)Dick Salt (2) - Manger of the Mariners in the early 70’s (Bryan) (ACS)Caramel And Fudge - Two more African-American prostitutes that lived in the apartment above Adam’s (ACS)Peaches - The whore that lived upstairs (ACS)F. Me Bailey - Greatest lawyer of all time (RD)Agua Caliente - Loves that guy. He does a great John Madden (ACS)Senior Penis - One the most dangerous drug lords to ever work (ADS)Shill Du'Jour - Good Bond secretary name (RD)Brexit Romero - Sounds like an International assassin (ACS)Lugansk - That gay diver who hit his head and gave the whole Canadian team AIDS (ACS)Leak O'rama - A Dutch action star, starred in “Sudden Death” (AOTH)Vaginismus - Great black guy name (ADS)Normcore - Guy that owns Westwood one (ACS)LaTolstoy - Great black guy name (ACS)Shapiro – Artist who is really good at anime. Died in the 60’s but was a real trendsetter (ACS)Chuck Spears – Good name for a racist. “Hey you workin’ with Chuck Spears over at the Klan?” (ACS)Norethindrone - DAG’s Sister (CLL)La Tuskegee - Black airline pilot (ACS)C-clamps – Nickname for Adam’s step-mom. “Ol’ C-clamps locked me out of the house again.” (ACS)Harry Nilsson - (Gary thinks) he does the voices on The Simpsons (ADS)Nutella - Great name for a crazy black woman (ACS)Sia - The perfect person to break up with. Would be perfect if she was dating Jack (hit the road Jack) (ACS)The Ball Catcher - What Adam used to call Ray's ass in junior high (ACFBSL)MOAB - Matt's new nickname (Mother of All Buttholes) (AONTH)Trip Reeb - Great name for a white guy (ACS)Merle Horn - One of the greatest best ropers to ever come down the Pecos (ACS)The Boring Machine - Lynette's name for Adam (ACS)Avocado Hand - The nickname of Eric Clapton's brother (Chet) who works at a Mexican place and is charge of the guacamole (ACS)Bagel Hand - Clapton's Jewish cousin (ACS)Fa-Sheeya (fascia) - A heavy set woman of color that works at the DMV (ACAFBSL)Ghrelin - New AM/PM mascot (ACS)Krav Maga (3) - An Israeli Captain from 1946 (ACS)Cuban Boa - Sounds like a dark skinned trannie (ACS)Gabardine - She's a very chatty woman of color middle-aged and she'll talk your ear off. (ACS)Guy Dudebro - Greatest name ever (AOTH)Otto Warmbier- Simultaneously the greatest and worst beer master brewer name ever (ACS)Leif Geragos - Greatest rocking attorney ever Viking rocker attorney (ACS)Ernest J. Bigot - "I'm just asking....I'm just wanna know...." (ACS)Panzanella - Cobra's full name (ACS)Sheet Metal Nibbler - Great name for Matt the porcelain punisher (AOTH)Big Grenadine - Sounds like a large black neighbor (ACS)Silent gym - Next to Keyless Chuck, best homeless guy name ever (ACS)Nuchilla - Sounds like a black vampire (Theo Von) (ACS)D' poleon - Black Napoleon (ACS)Luke Rockhold - Sounds like a character on The Flintstones (GS)Sissy squat - She was hot (AOTH)Beulah - The town horror (RD)Ronan Farrow - One of the best wheel men in Europe (ACS)Duke Bagg - Comedian Ian Bagg's brother (ACS)Root ball grinder - A horrible term for a bitchy wife (Ruth Ballgrinder and Harriet Mulcher) (Tim Allen) (ACS)Paul Funyun - Just a big dude who likes to have fun. Has a pink ox as a sidekick (ACS)Page/Savage - A great lawyer team (Adam Ray) (ACS)Ivar the Boneless - Ace’s dad’s nickname in high school. aka Jim the spineless (ACS)Bash Worthy - Comic strip's character name/title (ACS)Uncle Tom-bién - Mexican Uncle Tom (ACS)Alist Poon - An Indian exchange student who has cerebral palsy (ACS)Indignant Asswipes - Good name for an improv troupe (Gina) (ACS)Flora in Fauna - two black chicks that work for him (ADS)Cheap - Name of a he/she that literally went under sexual assignment surgery last month (ACS)Heroin (1)(Pronounced Ehr-o-win by JCVD) A character in Lord Of The Rings (Bryan) (ACS)Yersinia pestis - Ace did Celebrity Apprentice with that dude. He won that year (ADS)Morgue Mode - Sounds like a guy from Iceland who is a DJ (ACS)Rachel Bias - Great stripper name (ACS)Buzz Ramjet - Aviation attorney (ACS)Black Cherry - Stripper name Bryan (ACS)Saffron - Sassy black woman in Meg Whitman movie (ACS)Vibranium - a new black kid name from Black Panther (ACS)Bird Nerd - Marvel superhero (ACS)Morning Zoos/DJ's/Radio StationsGum and Condoms - (Show?)Dusty Labia - Adam's handle when he used to do AM Mornings. (ACS)Asscrack and Backsack in the morning with Sludge (LL)Crockpots and Headphones (ACS)Booger and Floor Wax (ACS)Almonds and Water (ACS)Cold Butter And Calves (ADS)Schluter And The Drain - Schluter has a thick Austrian accent , while "The Drain" has a super low voice (AOTH)Ace Rockolla - Just Google "Ace Rockolla Lightning round...." (LL)Fungus and Mold (Show?)Stupid and Petty (Show?)Eunice and Edgar - Bubba the Love Sponge's parents (ACS)Flip Flops and Fanny Packs (ACS)Hairy Shin - Does a KCRE show in the weekends (ACS)Deep Bra Grooves - Should be a Sirius XM station Channel 248, C+ and above! (ACS)Andy and Opie - Great Radio Show (ACS)QuietRock - Sounds like an easy listening rock station (AOTH)Quiet Crush - A good easy listening radio station (ACS)The Tool Box - SiriusXM took tune station aka KTOL (ACS)Ray's Enema Antics - New podcast on Carolla Digital (Bryan)(ACS)Doug Gets Blown While He Eats Pudding - Doug Benson's next podcast (ACS)Cat Packer - Used to do mornings with her brother, Fudge (ACS)Duke and Shinola - good morning show team (ACS)PlacesBoobville - (LL)Pedoph Isle aka Pedophile Island - Island where are all the pedophiles are sent to live. (Also a TV show/movie idea) (LL)Lil' Lord Fauntleroy’s Academy for Albino Hemophiliacs - Drew's childhood school (LL)Doesntexistizcan - Where presidential candidate Platitude's grandfather was from (ACS)Boga Raton - The world's worst resort spot (Show?)Meat Yard - Great name for a gay bar (ACS)Mister Fister's - Adam's all-time top name for a gay bar (ACS)Sub-Par - Worst name for a submarine sandwich shop (Show?)Queen Mary - Great name for a tranny bar (ACS)NuvaRing - A German racetrack. "The new Nissan GTR turned it in 7:21, faster than the Corvette." (Show?)Louis Pasteur Middle School (ACS)Helm’s Deep - World's first gay bar bakery (ACS)Kal Penn - One of the best sounding names to get an engineering degree from (ACS)Alaska State Motto - Love fishing but I hate your kids? Alaska! (PM)Duke University - John Wayne's college (ACS)Planned Possumhood - Planned Parenthood in Arkansas (ACS)Fruit Stand - Great name for a gay bar (ACS)Poo Poo City - Where Charles Fletcher Loomis' house is located (ACS)Blood Bank - Great name for a check cashing place in the hood (ACS)Bass Manor - Great name for a gay bar (ACS)The Dead C - Sounds like the worst name for a lesbian bar ever (ACS)Wood Bar - Good name for a gay bar (ACS)Ghost Load - Ride at Calico Ghost Town (ADS)Nasacort - Country club for Jewish folks where they play tennis at (ADS)L.A. HOTT (1) - An 80's bar with an outdoor door seating area (ACS)Fairy Wings - Good name for a bar on the west side (ACS)Second Hand/First World - Store that sells rich whitey’s high end stuff (ACS)The Lance Hunter - Perfect name for a gay bar (Dumb People Town)Pervert Park - Theo Vaughn grew up there (ACS)Big Sur - Great name for a big and tall shop (Show?)Studio Centric - Sounds like a Utopia. Between Valley Village and Sherman Oaks (AOTH)Asstard - Thor came from that planet (ACS)Grand Entrance - Great name for a gay bar (AOTH)Thermopolis - Where the Bun Boy is (ACS)The Turkish Embassy - Gay bar (ACS)Low Tide - Gay code for boner in the rear view mirror (ACS)Corumption - On the way to Vegas, where Heidi Fleiss lives with her macaws (ACS)C.C. Fichens - Sounds like a pretzel stand (Gina) (ACS)Timpani Barn - where to get timpani to go, has three big Mexicans in the kitchen (ACS)Heroin (2)(Pronounced Ehr-o-win by JCVD) The health food store in Venice (ACS)Pocket Passers - Next to Mister Fister’s (Gina) (ACS)MiscellaneousCleaning The Pink Turtle - Bryan's name for pleasuring oneself (ACS)Analingus - A new type of breath mint (LL)The Milk Of Arthritic Goats - A rabbi's curse: "May you suckle at the teet of the milk of arthritic goat!!!" (ACS)Carbon Dating - A black dating website (ACS)RU486 - Vanity plate for a guy who runs an abortion clinic (ADS)Jet Green - Amsterdam's Airlines (ACS)Stromer, Oldhafer and Carolla - World's worst law firm (AOTH)Ira Carolla - Sounds like an affliction "Oh my Ira Carolla's acting up" (ACS)Sawjay - Sounds French...gay word for sausage. "I was strokin' this dude’s sawjay" (ACS)Smokeless Cigarette - Name for Dr. Drew's honker after his prostate surgery (ADS)El Niño - Name of "Sinn" strip club DJ's cock (ACS)Blue Man - Crazy hairdresser's macaw who doesn't judge (PM)Lucia - An Italian moped (ACS)American Jewish World Service - A van that's begging to be shot at (ACS)E-aye? - Canadian version of EBay (ACS)Sweatpants Lesbian - What Adam would be. An in-between lesbian. Not a lipstick lesbian, not a butch dyke (ACS)SuckStrong - Bill Clinton's bracelet (ACS)Gaybus - Gay and bogus (ACS)Flappy Bird - The most offensive name for the vagina (ACS)G8 (Summit) - The Pontiac that Oprah gave away on her show (ACS)Oracle A The Delphi - Big new startup company (ADS)Crewkakke - A type of sweater (ACS)The Flying Dutchman - Great name for an Amsterdam airlines (ACS)Cleaning My Chain - Euphemism for beating off (ACS)Awesome Town - A gathering of three or more polar bears (ACS)Avocado - The Greek word for nut sack (ACS)Doucherette - A gum/patch that douchebags chew/use (ACS)Urban Milling -Black guys standing around (AOTH)Synesthesia - When you eat your own hair (ACS)Tuck Rule - When a guy pretends he's a chick and stands in front of the mirror (ACS)My #2 Pencil Is Out Of Lead - Another term for erectile dysfunction (ACS)Float A Bond - When a politician farts (RD)Vaginismus - black people's holiday, accompanied with a lot of ceremonial garb (ADS)Vaseline and Gauze - Elizabeth Taylor's new scent (ACS)Jewber - A drunk on a 10-speed (ACS)Chickpea - What Gina does when we camp (ACS)Oscar Squad (2) - Bad gay code (ACS)Airbus - Worst name for an aircraft. Sounds like “air donkey” (AOTH)Shailene Woodley - Sounds like the most fantastical verb/adverb combo. “I want to Shailene Woodley through a field of poppies with you” (Gina) (Twitter)Asshole Rider (2) - Worst piece of exercise equipment Vinnie’s ever endorsed (ACS)Diario La Prensa - Stealer of the jersey in Spanish (ACS)The Sicilian Fly Swatter - Sounds like a WWF move (Gina) (ACS)Jellyfish - Sounds like something your grandpa would buy for you at the mall (ACS)Fruit Fly - More politically correct term for fag hag (Show?)Jewgling - When a Jew "Googles" their symptoms (ACS)Tavares - David Wild's boner medicine (ACS)Jew -Over - A mulligan from a barmitzva. "Uh, I misread that...can I get a Jew-over?" (ACS)Ossified - That's a Don King word, there (ACS)Zero for Cecil - Worst charity ever (Bald Bryan) (ACS)A++ - A bra that Gina will never see (ACS)Joycelyn - A good name for Curly from the Three Stooges to say (ACS)Phallisee - Latin for "to see the penis" (ADS)Coffee Nap - Euphemism for pooping in your pants (ACS)USS Monitor - Doesn't sound like a ship of war, sounds like a night nurse (ACS)Dotard - A skirt a man wears (ACS)Wilding- Something derogatory that takes place in public pools in certain counties (ACS)Caveat - Latin for shitting on Adam's point (ADS)Festiva - Sounds like a boner medicine (ACS)Depeche Mode - French for “who dealt it?” (ADS)Beefy Clutch – The purse Gina thought Lady Gaga took to the Emmy’s (ACS)Sig Sauer - Something you would yell at Oktoberfest before downing a stiff stein of stout (ACS)Jeans day – Sounds like the special day for your special need son Gene, to raise money (ACS)Wilding - What takes place in public pools in certain counties (GS)4F - Can’t/won’t be eligible for the draft (ACS)Groupie - a kind of fish (ACS)The African chick - Horrible name for a boat (ACS)Inclusion rider - Snowboard for retarded kids (ACS)The Urethra - Bad name for a car (ACS)Mercury retrograde - when you take your index finger and shove it under your sack before you blow, and you belch it up later (ACS)UEFA - Transsexuals playing soccer with a balled up maxi pad (GS)Missed Connections- The worst airline ever (ACS)Carollo - Sounds like a Tool you’d use rarely (ACS)Brembo - that Mexican food company that makes that bread (Matt) (ACS)Futon - Chinese for bear trap (ACS)Food/DrinksDeer Bits - A venison cereal. Made of frosted deer flakes (Show?)Coco Chanel - Nestlé’s newest coffee flavor (ACS)Honey Dicks - Best cereal name ever (ACS)Dawson's Beard - A pudding flavor Ace saw at Whole Foods (ACS)Mighty Mutts - Worst breakfast cereal ever (ADS)Chillax - A cinnamon based drink from "Hector's" country (ACS)Black Dick - An English desert (ACS)Tardy Digression - Sounds like a finger food..."would you like another tardy digression?" "No, I'm saving room for the main meal" (IFYWABC)Double Bird Strike - Mixed drink created by Ace and Teresa. Made with Grey Goose, Wild Turkey, a splash of Canadian Club, and a splash of Hudson River water (ACS)GAYtorade - A sports drink for gay people, because they lose essential body fluids (ACS)University of Illinois At Urbana Champaign - Sounds like a carbonated drink for black people (ACS)Flinch Fuck - Part of a nutritious breakfast, and a healthy relationship (ADS)Phantom Punch - Something Bill Cosby gave his lady friends (ACS)Pansy Sauce - Goes good with some shrimp (ADS)Tilted Pillar - Kick ass IPA (AOTH)Shaver - A good name for a miniature pastrami sandwich (Cousin Sal Show)GPA - Something they add to children's cereal (ACS)Stellwell's - A new low fat snack cracker (ACS)Conchata Ferrell - A great cheese/unwanted cat (ACS)Poopwell's - One of the worst snacks Nabisco has ever put their name on (ACS)Belldini – Latest Taco Bell offering (ACS)Fuzzy Zoeller – Zima with a jigger of peach schnapps (ACS)Millennial Malaise - A sweet honey dipping sauce (ADS)Jelani Cobb - Sounds like an Indian dish (Gina) (ACS)Air Doodle - The very worst Super Bowl snack on the planet (ACS)Faygala - Jewish sports drink (ACS)Stroke Cane - Sounds like some sugary treat, mixed with a reach around (ACS)The Silence Breakers (2) - good name for a mint (ACS)Lesbian Squirt - Sponsor of the Dinah Shore Classic (ACS)Preemptive gay strike - Worst video game ever (ADS)TV Shows/MoviesCunt du' Jour - A great Bond villain name (ACS)Coffee and Donuts - (Charlie Coffee III and Johnny Donetti) Johnny's a tough street wise cop whose jive talking and plays by his own rules and Charlie's super uptight (LL)Pedoph Isle (aka) Pedophile Island - All pedophiles are sent to live on an isolated island, and a 747 full of Boy Scouts crash lands there and they have to fight to survive (Also a place) (ACS)Anus and Eyeball - Buddy cop TV show duo (ACS)Pussy Pioneer - John Candy's last movie (ACS)Red Velvet - Made up movie character Clown played by Paul Giamatti. "Was secret service, and someone died on his watch. Now he's takin to clownin'." Wears a red velvet clown outfit. (ACS)Destination Of The Semen - (Adam Ray) A movie Harrison Ford passed on twice (ACS)Gay Eye - Movie where Adam plays Buddy McKlan, a racist homophobic mechanic who is blinded in a freak hot transmission fluid accident. He gets the donor eyes from a gay guy who perished on a moped accident in Antigua. Co-starring Larry the Cable Guy as his best friend. (Co-written by Bryan Cranston) (ACS)Grinders - Sitcom where Jon Gruden moves in with Johnny Manziel (ACS)Squishy Red River - Movie that started John Wayne (Show?)Gusset And Cable - Perfect Cop buddy duo team (AOTH)Just One Of The Gays - Stars Shia LaBeouf (ACS)Hard Impact - Sounds like a Van Damme movie from the 90's (ACS)Hammer Pants And Ice - Worst cop detective duo from the 80's (ACS)Living With The Kilowatts - Adam's new animated series where they just leave toaster ovens on all day (ACS)Keep Calm And Rape A Lot - Worst Monty Python film ever (ACS)Medical Mishaps - New show Dave Coulier and Tawny Kitaen could host (ACS)Roaming With Bison - Another great Bill Murray movie (ACS)Gainesville Florida Financial Planner - Sounds like a Saturday Night Live skit (ACS)Blame the Bee Gees - Adam's next documentary (ACS)Adam Knees Your Dad In The Nuts - Adam's new game show (ACS)Navigeddon - Terrorists take over all of the GPS systems of cars, and send them careening into the Grand Canyon (ACS)Rings Of Honor - Terrorists take over Olympic training facility in Colorado Springs, and the athletes have to use their individual skills to escape. (Cameo by Randy Couture as the salty old coach) (ACS)Endless Time/Ample Time For Backup - Adam's new Netflix series (ACS)Tarred n' Feathered - Buddy flick starring a retarded guy and an Indian chief (Show?)Mr. Will Doo And Can Doo - PSA Motivational cartoon bathroom characters Will Doo (Played by Will Arnette) and Can Doo is shaped like a toilet. Filmed in kitschy Clutch Cargo style animation (ADS)Robot Lawyer - Great Phil Hartman bit (ACS)Umpire News Network - Adam's channel with umpires reporting. Unbiased reporting (ACS)Sofa Tard - New CW show coming soon (Matt) (AOTH)Junior Fantasy Island - Show where kids of reckless parents are shipped off to live with Bill Cosby and Felicia Rashad (ADS)2 And A Half Denali's - Hasn't been same since Sheen left (ACS)So Kanye - Sitcom from the 90's (ACS)Ridicuopothy - Sounds like a Mike Judge movie (ADS)Master Buck - One of John Candy's most controversial movies (ACS)LA HOTT (1) - An 80’s bar with an outdoor door seating area (ACS)Mother Hitler - Coming to TNT. Starring Patrick Swayze's bother, Don (ACS)Sink and Bounce - Movie about roller boogie from the 80's, starred Lil' Bow Wow (ACS)The Debs - A made up CW network show where you just put all the hot chicks in Hollywood (ACS)The Origin Story Of AIDS - Worst Marvel movie ever (Bryan)(ACS)Everybody Hates Vinnie - Horrible sitcom (ACS)Chick Clan - Good movie title (ACS)Condo in Redondo - Best movie I ever did (ADS)Red Lobsteria - New show Dr. Drew was talking about where African Americans form their own country (ACS)Earthquake rehab - Reality show Dr. drew seismic expert and a civil engineer come together (Rainn Wilson) (ACS)Rooster Jones - Great John Wayne movie. Super Fly meets True Grit (ACS)Ernest Bigot goes to..... (ACS)Nickels On The Job - First and only Jewish gum shoe on the job. ABC, Friday nights, 10:00 p.m. (ADS)Solicitor General - Great Danny Kaye movie (RD)Disjointed - Lorena Bobbitt biopic (ADS)Habib and Company - Horrible children's show (MS)Bobby's Room - Howie Mandel animated project from the 90's (ACS)Page/Savage - Great cop duo show from the ‘80’s (Adam Ray) (ACS)Paper Asshole - Great Tatum O’Neal film (ACS)L.A. HOTT (2) - Failed Steven Bochco series pilot (ACS)Pieces Of String Too Small To Use - Lena Dunham film from the late 90’s (ACS)Oscar Squad - New Marvel Movie (Gina) (ACS)Cortron/Melamine - Transformers (Gina) (ACS)Anoscope - Worst way to see a movie (ADS)Practical Rapist - New SNL character (Gina) (ACS)Superfoot - Worst Marvel movie ever (Bryan) (ACS)Celebrity Food Chain - Would be a great show (Jeff Cesario) (ACS)Backsack and Anus - Worst cop duo ever (RS)Korean moyle - ABC’s next sitcom (Jeff) ACSNanny Huntin ‘with Ted Nugent - Great reality show I’d watch (ACS)Progressive pope - New sitcom (Gina) ACSNick Mancuso: Construction Fluffer - New TV Show (AONT)Rush Blitzer - Adam’s character from his movie, “Snapper” (BSR)Books/Coffee Table BooksDade County Black Prom, 1985 (ACS)Here Are The Pajamas We Picture You In (ACS)Three Shitty Homes, One Washing Machine, Zero Dryers - Title of Adam's new book (Ray) (AOTH)Chapstick And Batteries - Title of Adam's next bestselling book (ACS)Who The Fuck Put Their Sombrero on My Keys? – Title of Adam’s next book (ACS)Cunt With A Grunt - Adam's favorite Dr. Seuss book (PM)You'll Never See A Cockroach Jog (PM)Kemo Skinny Calves - Adam's new children's book (ADS)You're Dyslexic And I'm Dumb - Adam and John Popper's collaborative next book (ACS)I Get It If You’re GWAR - Adam's next book (ACS)Bulk Magazine - Costco magazine that Jimmy Kimmell graced the cover of twice (ACS)Do You Have To Take Your Top Off To Dye Your Pubes, Drew? (LL)Glamping With Moriah - Adam's new book (ACS)From The Mouths of Babes (Hot Chicks Not Babies) (ACS)(The) Sweet Spot - Adam's next book (Bryan) (ACS)I Thought Things Would Be Better When I Was Rich (ACS)Radio Station Kitchen (ACS)Post-it Notes In Radio Station Kitchens (ACS)Comedy Club Green Rooms And The Sofas That Were Not Made For Them (ACS)Jethro, the Mexican Jew - A great children's book (Gina) (ACS)Professor and the Construction Worker -The worst children's book ever (ACS)Willie and the Weed - Good name for a children's book (ACS)What Black People Think White People Complain About (ACS)Everyone Eventually Becomes The Man (ACS)Recipe for Misery (1) - Name Of Adam’s next book (ACS)In Defense Of Black Face - Adam’s next book (ACS)Hurry Up And Make Sense (2) - Biography title of the Talking Heads (ACS)Native American NamesChief Thunderbear (LL)Dances With Cocks (ACS)Dances With Lipstick (ACS)Ol' Urethra Windows (ACS)Oxnard - Indian name meaning the balls of a bull (ACS)V/P NamesAbsorbent Rag - Good name for T's V (ACS)Hurt Locker - Another name for T's V (ACS)Judge's Mansion - Another name for T's GCmarket.com - Another name for T's V (ACS)City of Industry - Another name for T's V (ACS)Dutch Mook - Another name for T's V (ACS)s VNo Safe Spaces - Great name for T's V (ACS)Hobo Stove - Another name for A's V (ACS)Sausage Grinder - Another name for A's V (ACS)Dixville Notch - Another name for G's V (ACS)Snake River Canyon - Another name for G's V (ACS)Dakota Access Pipeline - Another name for G's V (ACS)The Holidome - Another name for G’s V (ACS)Discovery Bay - Great name for G's V (ACS)B.O. Box - Great name for G's V (ACS)Sea bag - Good name for G's V (ACS)El Portal - Great name for G's V (ACS)Harry Belafonte - Adam's name for his junk, if he were a woman (Show?)Top Gear - Another name for Adam’s junk (ACS)El Gordo/King Taco - Good name for G’s V (ACS)Submitted June 02, 2018 at 02:21PM by Texas1971 https://www.reddit.com/AdamCarolla/comments/8o2hxt/carollaisms\\\\\_june/?utm\\\\\_source=iftttvia /AdamCarollaSubmitted June 02, 2018 at 02:48PM by peterboykin https://www.reddit.com/MagaFirstNews/comments/8o2oh9/carollaisms\\\\_june/?utm\\\\_source=iftttvia /MagaFirstNewsSubmitted June 02, 2018 at 05:23PM by peterboykin https://www.reddit.com/MagaFirstNews/comments/8o3pnj/carollaisms\\\_june/?utm\\\_source=iftttvia /MagaFirstNewsSubmitted June 02, 2018 at 07:18PM by peterboykin https://www.reddit.com/MagaFirstNews/comments/8o4g7v/carollaisms\\_june/?utm\\_source=iftttvia /MagaFirstNews
Submitted June 02, 2018 at 08:13PM by peterboykin https://www.reddit.com/MagaFirstNews/comments/8o4scx/carollaisms\_june/?utm\_source=ifttt
via /MagaFirstNews
submitted by peterboykin to MagaFirstNews [link] [comments]


2018.06.03 02:13 peterboykin Carollaisms J(une)

Carollaisms J(une)
Carollaisms J(une)Carollaisms J(une)Carollaisms J(une)Carollaisms (June)Band Names/Rap StarsMitt Romney and the One Percenters (ACS)ManAyz - Rap star (LL)D'Bagz - Rap star (LL)Maxi Pad - An all-girl band that knows how to rock (LL)Dick Tingle - One of the best blues men in the business (Show?)Lynette and the Lackeys (ACS)Straw Hat and the Bowties - Jerry Springer's dixieland band who plays at the Knott's Berry Farm Good Time Theater (ACS)Gut Fluffer (ACS)Johnny Beaumont and The Legionnaires - All wear matching powder blue tuxedoes (ACS)Automatic Vaginismus – Great band name (LL)Dissuade/D’ Suede - Rappeproducer of Kanye/one of Kim's ex beaus (ACS)Starchy Deuce - Band that should be produced by D' Suede (ACS)Narthex - (ACS)Epileptic Declawed Hamster - That is a helluva punk band right there (ACS)Loretta Lynch - Country singer who sang "Stand By Your Man" (ACS)The Areolas - Covered an Eagles song in the ‘90s (ACS)Fleece and Flannel - One of the best lesbian acoustic duos you will ever see (ACS)3 Chainz - Rap star (ACS)Blues Squatter - Adam's dad’s band name (ACS)Tampon Kayak - One of Seattle's greatest, but least heard of indie bands (ACS)Jizz Grenade (LL)Dryer Fire - Hot indie band name (ACS)Iranian Revolutionary Guard - Prince's backup band (ACS)Rape Kit - Name of Adam's band from high school (ACS)Nog Bong - A band Adam was in in high school (ACS)Bum Blazer – Adam’s band in high school (ACS)White Trash Kimchi - Another good band name (Bald Bryan) (ACS)White Noise - Adam's rap name (ADS)Promethazine - Lil Wayne's sister (ADS)Light Rail - Great Rap name (ADS)Danny In The Joint - Good indie band name (ACS)Anal Cleft - One of the worst reggae singers to leave Jamaica (ACS)Anal Cleft and the Taints - Great reggae group (ACS)MEL-ROL - One of The Spice Girls (AOTH)D'bris - Great Rap name (ACS)Cisgender - A militant female rapper....for the ladies (ACS)Krav Maga (1) - Country singing Jew (ACS)Lynette and Paulette - Sounds like a singing duo from the 60's (RD)Nuts In The Sink - Name of Ray’s new band (Ray) (AOTH)SubDude - Pete Holmes' rap name (ACS)Ray And The Enemas - Blues singer and his backup band (ADS)Yakov Crutchfield - He has a show in Branson (ADS)Mac 18 - Adam’s favorite rapper (RD)Tremble Lean – Adam’s rap name (ACBSL)Sticker Back – Worst band out of Canada ever (ACS)Pennywise and Pound Foolish - A band from the ‘90's (RD)Strawberry Shortcake's Neti Pot - Great band name (Twitter)Puffy Elon Musk - Worst rapper ever (ACS)Pantera Club at Laguna Seca (Twitter)Savage Body Attack - New wave romantic band Ace was in when he was 19 (FBL)Jumping Jazzy Jews - Jeff Goldblum's jazz band (ACS)Snore Cherry - Great band name (ACS)Pat Benatard - Pat Benatar cover band (ACS)Rancid Nuts - Good band name (ACS)Gary And The Knotholes - Good band name (AOTH)Tampon Canoe - Good indie band (ACS)One Erection - A good boy band (ACS)Flushin' Dew - A good country duo (ACS)Armo Jeweler - Great band name (RD)Radon - (Lynette thinks) there a Whitesnake cover-band (ACS)The Taste Of Ace - Great band name (ACS)King Grape and the Raisinettes (GS)Concord Grape and the Raisinettes (GS)Gary Taco - Love that band (ACS)The Silence Breakers (2) - Good punk band (Gina) (ACS)Daddy’s Got A Dually – Good country song (ACS)Dip Curtain - Good indie band (ACS)Crystal Lobbyists - Sounds like a great techno band (ACS)Narcissistic Monk -Great indie band (GS)Sporty Prius - Worst of the Spice Girls (ACS)Laden and Bravado - 70s duo who opened for Seals n Crofts (ACS)The Bouncers - great band name (ACS)Hurry up and make sense (1) - a good talking heads album (ACS)Appropriate Sombrero - Maxapada’s next band name (Bryan) (ACS)Flirtatious Contrail - great rap name (GS)Jack Johnson - Guy from The White Stripes aka The Black Stripes (ACS)Song TitlesMeatless Mondays - Horrible Bangles song (Show?)Measles and Commuter Trains - Worst Christmas song ever (ACS)White Guys Be Ownin' Everything - Adam's next hit (ACS)Blood On The Grout - John Cougar Mellencamp song (ACS)No Blood In The Peckeroo - Good John Cougar song (ACS)Mellen's Gold - A three disc box set of nothing but John Cougar Mellencamp hits (ACS)Freaks, Retards and Jews - Not a Cher song (ACS)Pedophile Cops - Good Cheap Trick song (ACS)Pig Anus Soup - Favorite Rolling Stones album (Bryan) (ACS)That Dog Don’t Mess With Olga and Natalia Don’t Spit No Mo’ - Sounds like a Mississippi Delta blues song (Bryan) (ACS)Goggles Are For Pussies - Trace Adkins' number one hit (ACAFBSL)Whistle While You Masturbate - The lost Disney song aka "Whistle While You Jerk" (ACS)12 Pack & Dick's Hard - Name of Adam's new album (Gina) (ACS)Blood and Soil - A good Smithereens song (ACS)Pina Colada in Amsterdam - Worst Jimmy Buffet song ever (ACS)Tough Times In The City - Great Nick Gilder song (ACS)I've Got A Hamster In My Scrotum And He's Looking For His Keys - That's a good country song (ACS)Gay Hitler -Great Elvis Costello song (ACS)Tard On The Tool Shed - Good Mellenamp song (AOTH)Condo in Redondo - Sublime song (ADS)Animoji - Band that sung "Obsession" (ACS)People Who Have Lost People - Worst Barbara Streisand song ever (ACS)Tilted Heart - Great Tammy Wynette song (ADS)Yoga wood - Great Beatles song (ACS)Anal cleft - Song from the Sound of Music (ACS)Morgue Mode - Sounds like a guy from Iceland who is a DJ (ACS)I’ve got a Saturday and two friends - great country song (Gina) (ACS)Recipe for Misery (2) - Title of the next Guns N Roses album (ACS)Circling Back To Baldwin - Good name for a country song (ACS)Keistered in Winnipeg - (Bald’s) favorite Willie Nelson song (ACS)Football Players/Athletes/Teams:Legs Akimbo - Wide Receiver (ACS)Feral Katz - Nose Tackle (ACS)L' Brarian Booker - Wide Receiver (ACS)Oscar Buzz - Linebacker (ACS)DeVigorous Lover - Wide Receiver (ACS)Nadir Zenith - Placekicker (ACS)DeGluten Free - Offensive Lineman (ACS)Tangy Mango - Fullback (ACS)N'Farious Plan - (position?) (ACS)Modular Holmes - (position?) (ACS)Fortuitous Bounce - Safety (ACS)Operatin' Thetan - (ACS) Quarterback for the Washington Redskins (ACS)Minority Banks - HOF OLB who died tragically in a car wreck shortly after his HOF induction, a natural athlete, he played option QB in college along with being a stand out member of the track team, and in high school he was captain of the basketball team. Survived by his twin brother Majority Banks, who also played in the league, and daughter Recuser Banks who many believe was the best athlete in the family (ACS)Coach Platitude - "Take a knee son...helmet's not a chair" (ACS)Glendora Bevmo - Mother of DeVigorous Lover and L' Brarian Booker (different fathers, of course) (ACS)Marshall Law - (Allison) (ACS)Orlando Ceeworld - (position?) (ACS)Du Vatine - (position?) (Show?)Raja Slate - Super fast wide-out out of Marshall via LSU (AOTH)Moe Greene - Great corner for the Washington Redskins in the 80’s (ACS)Bronx Defenders - Sounds like a AAA hockey team (RD)Medical Error - Slipped in the draft due to a video being released just prior (ACS)Homeo Stasis (position?) (ACS)Capybara - The greatest name for a major league skipper (ACS)Ejaxico Johnson (position?) (ACS)Radiant Barrier vs. Attic Fan - The worst WWE matchup ever to grace the stage (AOTH)Bamboo Brick - one of the greatest mixed martial artists on the planet (AOTH)Dexter Methorphan - He did not participate in the combines, but his coaches say he can run a 4.3 (Twitter)Bob Jacuzzi - Great point guard for the Celtics aka "THE COOZE" (ACS)Shame Negation - Picked to leave Clemson early and go very early in the draft this year. (ADS)Entertainment Crackers - Another name for the Washington Generals ACSHardibacker - Good name for an inside backer (ACS)Osmosis - Black dude. Forward for the Knicks who might or might not have been traded (ADS)Onus Wilson - NFL draftee (ACS)World Be Mine - Adam’s new basketball name (ACS)Porn Star Names/Terms/Gay Code:Spoodini - (LL)Rocky Stucco - (AOTH)No Can Doo - Backdoor anal queen of China (ACS)Kristallnacht - Worst porn star name in the business (ACS)Madison Avenue (I am Rappaport Podcast)Hero Du Jour (I am Rappaport Podcast)Kindle Fire (ACS)Jackson Hole - Gay porn actor (ACS)Col. Duke Lacrosse - Adam's porn name (LL)Duke Circumference - Adam's gay porn name (ACS)Rich Data - Gay porn actor (Show?)Tom Foolery - Gay porn actor (Show?)Honey Dijon - Great porn star name (Show?)Aids Machete - One of Adam's gay porn names. "Very short stint, I only did 2 weeks with that name, so it was like 41 movies." (ACS)Bryce Canyon - Great gay porn name (ACS)The Italian Coastguard - A gay move. "Let me just start with basic anal, then I'll slide into the Italian Coast Guard." (ACS)Tetanus Gym - Good gay porn name "Who you working with?" "Tetanus Gym." "Oh boy, make sure you're on top" (ACS)Shared A Back Fence - gay slang (ACS)Mea Culpa - Adam's porn name (ACS)Hand Twins - Gay code (ACS)Backscatter - Porn technology (PM)Cajun Tree Climber - Gay code (AOTH)Snow Blower- Gay code (AOTH)Stump Grinder - Gay code (AOTH)Tumbler And Coaster - Adam's gay slang replacement for "top and bottom" (PM)Go For A Bike Ride - Gay code (ACS)Artie Fartie - Adam's porn name from the 80's (ACS)Road Island Ray - Ray's porn name (AOTH)38KKK -A type of porn that comes out of Kentucky (ACS)Tech Screw - A dirty website for geeks (ACS)Bearvalanche - Worst gay move ever (ACS)Wacked Off Pieces Of Cactus - Gay code for gay rough trade (ACS)Brad Nail - Good gay porn name (ADS)Lightning Rod - Good gay porn name for Milo Yiannopplous (ADS)Milk Barn - Another name for Adam's bathroom sink (ACS)Meat Thievery - That's just good gay code (ACS)Hairy Shin - Adam's gay porn name (ACS)Asian Persuasion - Sounds like a good name for a porn series Asian persuasion 16 (ACS)Cock Holster - Good movie series, cock holster 14 (ACS)Celebrity Du Jour - Great porn name (ACS)Europol - Another great porn name (ACS)Roy Wood - Adam's gay porn name (ACS)Tank slapper - Gay slang (Gina) (ACS)Porch Pirate - Gay term (ACS)Mad Chuck - The world's worst name for a gay porn star (AOTH)Sweat lodge - Gay code (ACS)The L.A. Underground - Sounds like a gay bar (M&J)Skin and grin - Gay slang (ACS)Rear Admiral - The name of one of the best bars on west side (ACS)Loaded for bear - Now a gay term (GS)Fruit Of The Year - A porn Dave (Dameshek) starred in (ACS)The Lebanese Comedian - Ace's favorite sex position (ACS)Cockout - When a gay guy doesn't try very hard (ACS)Margana Wood - Porn name (ACS)Hugh Bris - Porn star (RD)Matte Clear - Fondalier’s gay porn name (AOTH)Palatial Estates – A good 80’s fake tittie porn name (AOTH)Cokie Roberts - Great porn name (ACS)Armenian Christmas - An unspeakable sexual act in prison. "Johnny ratted out the white supremacists to the warden, so they gave him an Armenian Christmas" (Show?)Ride The Pine - Gay slang (ADS)Meet Gaze - Gay slang (ACS)Asshole Rider - Gay slang (ACS)Cash Widedick - Ace's porn name if you can call an apple a honey crisp. (ACS)Shanda Lear - Great stripper name (Gina) (ACS)Fiery Cherry - Good porn name (ACS)Jerk the wheel - Code for masturbation (ACS)Giddyup Titties - Gina’s porn name (Gina) (ACS)French astronaut - Great gay slang (ACS)Mr Bandera - gay code (ACS)Beefmato/Clamato - sounds like names of venerial diseases (ACS)Spanner - Australian gay code (ACS)Rocky tenure - Adam’s gay porn name (ACS)The End Game - One of Stormy Daniels movie titles (RD)Room for cream - Great porno title (Gina) (ACS)Pedialyte shower - Worst sexual act ever (Sklar) (ACS)Foot Zunki - Add-on to the Pedialyte shower (ACS)Self rimming sink - gay slang (AOTH)Harvey Mudd - gay bar drink where vermouth and bartender shit is mixed in a goblet (ACS)Barney’s Beanery - ultimate name for a gay bar (ACS)Parallel park both ways - euphemism for being bi (GS)The Big Three - Gerago’s junk (RD)73 - When a fat guy tries to 69 with a chubby prostitute he met at a ham radio convention(ACS)Backlog - Stormy Daniels movie title (Bryan)(ACS)Miscellaneous PeopleTrajectory Hagar - High school kid "heading down the wrong path" in life (ACS)Slick Mouth - Adam's prison name (ACS)Rich Carless - Cool homeless guy name (ACS)Keyless Chuck - Best homeless guy name (ACS)Nasal Ranger - Worst superhero name ever (Gina) (ACS)Krav Maga (2) - Good name for a sheriff (ADS)Hubcap Annie - Horror that hangs out with Keyless Chuck (ACS)Becky Honkington (Allison) (ACS)Monica Chugscock - (Pronounced "Shuggscawk") (ADS)Tyvek DuPont - Best rich guy’s name (AOTH)Mattress - A Model/actress (ACS)Hofmeister Kink - Nazi war criminal who's been in hiding in Brazil for the past 61 years. aka Jake Johnson (ACS)Serpiginous - The world's wimpiest swordsman. Sir Piginous of Wussville (LL)Chick Fil a - Great play-by-play guy for the Warriors from the 70’s (Show?)Peri Menopausal - Best P.I. working the Chicago beat (LL)Whiskey Dick - The neighborhood pedophile in the clown outfit (ACS)Surge - Guy that drives for ÜBER (ACS)Babbling Brook - Great name for a female cattle auctioneer (PM)Terra Firma - Name of the "woman of color" that heckled Adam at a Ventura live show and was removed by force (The Ranker Podcast)Octomom - Great Batman villain (Bryan) (ACS)Larry The Cabinet Guy - Failed Israeli comic…"Don't get 'er done!" (ACS)Rod Blagojevich - Joe Francis' slimy brother who sells above ground pools out of a primered van (ACS)Cockchug Man - The gay superhero in The Village People that wears just all leather (ACS)MEL-ROL- She's one of The Spice Girls (AOTH)Hand Farts - A new comedian Adam had never heard of (ACS)Juan Jeremy - The greatest international film star ever (ACS)Bitchathane Jackson - Good name for a "sista" (ACS)Tobar - Perfect caveman name (ACS)Vroman - A fast moving Roman (ACS)Korn Syrup and Fructose - Women of color who work at the strip club with Jade (stage 4) (ACS)Fred Meyer - Lucy's neighbor (ACS)Kimchi - The Asian flutist (ACS)Pacoima - The mechanic from Taxi (ACS)Dick Salt - NATO Alliance General (ACS)Dick Salt (2) - Manger of the Mariners in the early 70’s (Bryan) (ACS)Caramel And Fudge - Two more African-American prostitutes that lived in the apartment above Adam’s (ACS)Peaches - The whore that lived upstairs (ACS)F. Me Bailey - Greatest lawyer of all time (RD)Agua Caliente - Loves that guy. He does a great John Madden (ACS)Senior Penis - One the most dangerous drug lords to ever work (ADS)Shill Du'Jour - Good Bond secretary name (RD)Brexit Romero - Sounds like an International assassin (ACS)Lugansk - That gay diver who hit his head and gave the whole Canadian team AIDS (ACS)Leak O'rama - A Dutch action star, starred in “Sudden Death” (AOTH)Vaginismus - Great black guy name (ADS)Normcore - Guy that owns Westwood one (ACS)LaTolstoy - Great black guy name (ACS)Shapiro – Artist who is really good at anime. Died in the 60’s but was a real trendsetter (ACS)Chuck Spears – Good name for a racist. “Hey you workin’ with Chuck Spears over at the Klan?” (ACS)Norethindrone - DAG’s Sister (CLL)La Tuskegee - Black airline pilot (ACS)C-clamps – Nickname for Adam’s step-mom. “Ol’ C-clamps locked me out of the house again.” (ACS)Harry Nilsson - (Gary thinks) he does the voices on The Simpsons (ADS)Nutella - Great name for a crazy black woman (ACS)Sia - The perfect person to break up with. Would be perfect if she was dating Jack (hit the road Jack) (ACS)The Ball Catcher - What Adam used to call Ray's ass in junior high (ACFBSL)MOAB - Matt's new nickname (Mother of All Buttholes) (AONTH)Trip Reeb - Great name for a white guy (ACS)Merle Horn - One of the greatest best ropers to ever come down the Pecos (ACS)The Boring Machine - Lynette's name for Adam (ACS)Avocado Hand - The nickname of Eric Clapton's brother (Chet) who works at a Mexican place and is charge of the guacamole (ACS)Bagel Hand - Clapton's Jewish cousin (ACS)Fa-Sheeya (fascia) - A heavy set woman of color that works at the DMV (ACAFBSL)Ghrelin - New AM/PM mascot (ACS)Krav Maga (3) - An Israeli Captain from 1946 (ACS)Cuban Boa - Sounds like a dark skinned trannie (ACS)Gabardine - She's a very chatty woman of color middle-aged and she'll talk your ear off. (ACS)Guy Dudebro - Greatest name ever (AOTH)Otto Warmbier- Simultaneously the greatest and worst beer master brewer name ever (ACS)Leif Geragos - Greatest rocking attorney ever Viking rocker attorney (ACS)Ernest J. Bigot - "I'm just asking....I'm just wanna know...." (ACS)Panzanella - Cobra's full name (ACS)Sheet Metal Nibbler - Great name for Matt the porcelain punisher (AOTH)Big Grenadine - Sounds like a large black neighbor (ACS)Silent gym - Next to Keyless Chuck, best homeless guy name ever (ACS)Nuchilla - Sounds like a black vampire (Theo Von) (ACS)D' poleon - Black Napoleon (ACS)Luke Rockhold - Sounds like a character on The Flintstones (GS)Sissy squat - She was hot (AOTH)Beulah - The town horror (RD)Ronan Farrow - One of the best wheel men in Europe (ACS)Duke Bagg - Comedian Ian Bagg's brother (ACS)Root ball grinder - A horrible term for a bitchy wife (Ruth Ballgrinder and Harriet Mulcher) (Tim Allen) (ACS)Paul Funyun - Just a big dude who likes to have fun. Has a pink ox as a sidekick (ACS)Page/Savage - A great lawyer team (Adam Ray) (ACS)Ivar the Boneless - Ace’s dad’s nickname in high school. aka Jim the spineless (ACS)Bash Worthy - Comic strip's character name/title (ACS)Uncle Tom-bién - Mexican Uncle Tom (ACS)Alist Poon - An Indian exchange student who has cerebral palsy (ACS)Indignant Asswipes - Good name for an improv troupe (Gina) (ACS)Flora in Fauna - two black chicks that work for him (ADS)Cheap - Name of a he/she that literally went under sexual assignment surgery last month (ACS)Heroin (1)(Pronounced Ehr-o-win by JCVD) A character in Lord Of The Rings (Bryan) (ACS)Yersinia pestis - Ace did Celebrity Apprentice with that dude. He won that year (ADS)Morgue Mode - Sounds like a guy from Iceland who is a DJ (ACS)Rachel Bias - Great stripper name (ACS)Buzz Ramjet - Aviation attorney (ACS)Black Cherry - Stripper name Bryan (ACS)Saffron - Sassy black woman in Meg Whitman movie (ACS)Vibranium - a new black kid name from Black Panther (ACS)Bird Nerd - Marvel superhero (ACS)Morning Zoos/DJ's/Radio StationsGum and Condoms - (Show?)Dusty Labia - Adam's handle when he used to do AM Mornings. (ACS)Asscrack and Backsack in the morning with Sludge (LL)Crockpots and Headphones (ACS)Booger and Floor Wax (ACS)Almonds and Water (ACS)Cold Butter And Calves (ADS)Schluter And The Drain - Schluter has a thick Austrian accent , while "The Drain" has a super low voice (AOTH)Ace Rockolla - Just Google "Ace Rockolla Lightning round...." (LL)Fungus and Mold (Show?)Stupid and Petty (Show?)Eunice and Edgar - Bubba the Love Sponge's parents (ACS)Flip Flops and Fanny Packs (ACS)Hairy Shin - Does a KCRE show in the weekends (ACS)Deep Bra Grooves - Should be a Sirius XM station Channel 248, C+ and above! (ACS)Andy and Opie - Great Radio Show (ACS)QuietRock - Sounds like an easy listening rock station (AOTH)Quiet Crush - A good easy listening radio station (ACS)The Tool Box - SiriusXM took tune station aka KTOL (ACS)Ray's Enema Antics - New podcast on Carolla Digital (Bryan)(ACS)Doug Gets Blown While He Eats Pudding - Doug Benson's next podcast (ACS)Cat Packer - Used to do mornings with her brother, Fudge (ACS)Duke and Shinola - good morning show team (ACS)PlacesBoobville - (LL)Pedoph Isle aka Pedophile Island - Island where are all the pedophiles are sent to live. (Also a TV show/movie idea) (LL)Lil' Lord Fauntleroy’s Academy for Albino Hemophiliacs - Drew's childhood school (LL)Doesntexistizcan - Where presidential candidate Platitude's grandfather was from (ACS)Boga Raton - The world's worst resort spot (Show?)Meat Yard - Great name for a gay bar (ACS)Mister Fister's - Adam's all-time top name for a gay bar (ACS)Sub-Par - Worst name for a submarine sandwich shop (Show?)Queen Mary - Great name for a tranny bar (ACS)NuvaRing - A German racetrack. "The new Nissan GTR turned it in 7:21, faster than the Corvette." (Show?)Louis Pasteur Middle School (ACS)Helm’s Deep - World's first gay bar bakery (ACS)Kal Penn - One of the best sounding names to get an engineering degree from (ACS)Alaska State Motto - Love fishing but I hate your kids? Alaska! (PM)Duke University - John Wayne's college (ACS)Planned Possumhood - Planned Parenthood in Arkansas (ACS)Fruit Stand - Great name for a gay bar (ACS)Poo Poo City - Where Charles Fletcher Loomis' house is located (ACS)Blood Bank - Great name for a check cashing place in the hood (ACS)Bass Manor - Great name for a gay bar (ACS)The Dead C - Sounds like the worst name for a lesbian bar ever (ACS)Wood Bar - Good name for a gay bar (ACS)Ghost Load - Ride at Calico Ghost Town (ADS)Nasacort - Country club for Jewish folks where they play tennis at (ADS)L.A. HOTT (1) - An 80's bar with an outdoor door seating area (ACS)Fairy Wings - Good name for a bar on the west side (ACS)Second Hand/First World - Store that sells rich whitey’s high end stuff (ACS)The Lance Hunter - Perfect name for a gay bar (Dumb People Town)Pervert Park - Theo Vaughn grew up there (ACS)Big Sur - Great name for a big and tall shop (Show?)Studio Centric - Sounds like a Utopia. Between Valley Village and Sherman Oaks (AOTH)Asstard - Thor came from that planet (ACS)Grand Entrance - Great name for a gay bar (AOTH)Thermopolis - Where the Bun Boy is (ACS)The Turkish Embassy - Gay bar (ACS)Low Tide - Gay code for boner in the rear view mirror (ACS)Corumption - On the way to Vegas, where Heidi Fleiss lives with her macaws (ACS)C.C. Fichens - Sounds like a pretzel stand (Gina) (ACS)Timpani Barn - where to get timpani to go, has three big Mexicans in the kitchen (ACS)Heroin (2)(Pronounced Ehr-o-win by JCVD) The health food store in Venice (ACS)Pocket Passers - Next to Mister Fister’s (Gina) (ACS)MiscellaneousCleaning The Pink Turtle - Bryan's name for pleasuring oneself (ACS)Analingus - A new type of breath mint (LL)The Milk Of Arthritic Goats - A rabbi's curse: "May you suckle at the teet of the milk of arthritic goat!!!" (ACS)Carbon Dating - A black dating website (ACS)RU486 - Vanity plate for a guy who runs an abortion clinic (ADS)Jet Green - Amsterdam's Airlines (ACS)Stromer, Oldhafer and Carolla - World's worst law firm (AOTH)Ira Carolla - Sounds like an affliction "Oh my Ira Carolla's acting up" (ACS)Sawjay - Sounds French...gay word for sausage. "I was strokin' this dude’s sawjay" (ACS)Smokeless Cigarette - Name for Dr. Drew's honker after his prostate surgery (ADS)El Niño - Name of "Sinn" strip club DJ's cock (ACS)Blue Man - Crazy hairdresser's macaw who doesn't judge (PM)Lucia - An Italian moped (ACS)American Jewish World Service - A van that's begging to be shot at (ACS)E-aye? - Canadian version of EBay (ACS)Sweatpants Lesbian - What Adam would be. An in-between lesbian. Not a lipstick lesbian, not a butch dyke (ACS)SuckStrong - Bill Clinton's bracelet (ACS)Gaybus - Gay and bogus (ACS)Flappy Bird - The most offensive name for the vagina (ACS)G8 (Summit) - The Pontiac that Oprah gave away on her show (ACS)Oracle A The Delphi - Big new startup company (ADS)Crewkakke - A type of sweater (ACS)The Flying Dutchman - Great name for an Amsterdam airlines (ACS)Cleaning My Chain - Euphemism for beating off (ACS)Awesome Town - A gathering of three or more polar bears (ACS)Avocado - The Greek word for nut sack (ACS)Doucherette - A gum/patch that douchebags chew/use (ACS)Urban Milling -Black guys standing around (AOTH)Synesthesia - When you eat your own hair (ACS)Tuck Rule - When a guy pretends he's a chick and stands in front of the mirror (ACS)My #2 Pencil Is Out Of Lead - Another term for erectile dysfunction (ACS)Float A Bond - When a politician farts (RD)Vaginismus - black people's holiday, accompanied with a lot of ceremonial garb (ADS)Vaseline and Gauze - Elizabeth Taylor's new scent (ACS)Jewber - A drunk on a 10-speed (ACS)Chickpea - What Gina does when we camp (ACS)Oscar Squad (2) - Bad gay code (ACS)Airbus - Worst name for an aircraft. Sounds like “air donkey” (AOTH)Shailene Woodley - Sounds like the most fantastical verb/adverb combo. “I want to Shailene Woodley through a field of poppies with you” (Gina) (Twitter)Asshole Rider (2) - Worst piece of exercise equipment Vinnie’s ever endorsed (ACS)Diario La Prensa - Stealer of the jersey in Spanish (ACS)The Sicilian Fly Swatter - Sounds like a WWF move (Gina) (ACS)Jellyfish - Sounds like something your grandpa would buy for you at the mall (ACS)Fruit Fly - More politically correct term for fag hag (Show?)Jewgling - When a Jew "Googles" their symptoms (ACS)Tavares - David Wild's boner medicine (ACS)Jew -Over - A mulligan from a barmitzva. "Uh, I misread that...can I get a Jew-over?" (ACS)Ossified - That's a Don King word, there (ACS)Zero for Cecil - Worst charity ever (Bald Bryan) (ACS)A++ - A bra that Gina will never see (ACS)Joycelyn - A good name for Curly from the Three Stooges to say (ACS)Phallisee - Latin for "to see the penis" (ADS)Coffee Nap - Euphemism for pooping in your pants (ACS)USS Monitor - Doesn't sound like a ship of war, sounds like a night nurse (ACS)Dotard - A skirt a man wears (ACS)Wilding- Something derogatory that takes place in public pools in certain counties (ACS)Caveat - Latin for shitting on Adam's point (ADS)Festiva - Sounds like a boner medicine (ACS)Depeche Mode - French for “who dealt it?” (ADS)Beefy Clutch – The purse Gina thought Lady Gaga took to the Emmy’s (ACS)Sig Sauer - Something you would yell at Oktoberfest before downing a stiff stein of stout (ACS)Jeans day – Sounds like the special day for your special need son Gene, to raise money (ACS)Wilding - What takes place in public pools in certain counties (GS)4F - Can’t/won’t be eligible for the draft (ACS)Groupie - a kind of fish (ACS)The African chick - Horrible name for a boat (ACS)Inclusion rider - Snowboard for retarded kids (ACS)The Urethra - Bad name for a car (ACS)Mercury retrograde - when you take your index finger and shove it under your sack before you blow, and you belch it up later (ACS)UEFA - Transsexuals playing soccer with a balled up maxi pad (GS)Missed Connections- The worst airline ever (ACS)Carollo - Sounds like a Tool you’d use rarely (ACS)Brembo - that Mexican food company that makes that bread (Matt) (ACS)Futon - Chinese for bear trap (ACS)Food/DrinksDeer Bits - A venison cereal. Made of frosted deer flakes (Show?)Coco Chanel - Nestlé’s newest coffee flavor (ACS)Honey Dicks - Best cereal name ever (ACS)Dawson's Beard - A pudding flavor Ace saw at Whole Foods (ACS)Mighty Mutts - Worst breakfast cereal ever (ADS)Chillax - A cinnamon based drink from "Hector's" country (ACS)Black Dick - An English desert (ACS)Tardy Digression - Sounds like a finger food..."would you like another tardy digression?" "No, I'm saving room for the main meal" (IFYWABC)Double Bird Strike - Mixed drink created by Ace and Teresa. Made with Grey Goose, Wild Turkey, a splash of Canadian Club, and a splash of Hudson River water (ACS)GAYtorade - A sports drink for gay people, because they lose essential body fluids (ACS)University of Illinois At Urbana Champaign - Sounds like a carbonated drink for black people (ACS)Flinch Fuck - Part of a nutritious breakfast, and a healthy relationship (ADS)Phantom Punch - Something Bill Cosby gave his lady friends (ACS)Pansy Sauce - Goes good with some shrimp (ADS)Tilted Pillar - Kick ass IPA (AOTH)Shaver - A good name for a miniature pastrami sandwich (Cousin Sal Show)GPA - Something they add to children's cereal (ACS)Stellwell's - A new low fat snack cracker (ACS)Conchata Ferrell - A great cheese/unwanted cat (ACS)Poopwell's - One of the worst snacks Nabisco has ever put their name on (ACS)Belldini – Latest Taco Bell offering (ACS)Fuzzy Zoeller – Zima with a jigger of peach schnapps (ACS)Millennial Malaise - A sweet honey dipping sauce (ADS)Jelani Cobb - Sounds like an Indian dish (Gina) (ACS)Air Doodle - The very worst Super Bowl snack on the planet (ACS)Faygala - Jewish sports drink (ACS)Stroke Cane - Sounds like some sugary treat, mixed with a reach around (ACS)The Silence Breakers (2) - good name for a mint (ACS)Lesbian Squirt - Sponsor of the Dinah Shore Classic (ACS)Preemptive gay strike - Worst video game ever (ADS)TV Shows/MoviesCunt du' Jour - A great Bond villain name (ACS)Coffee and Donuts - (Charlie Coffee III and Johnny Donetti) Johnny's a tough street wise cop whose jive talking and plays by his own rules and Charlie's super uptight (LL)Pedoph Isle (aka) Pedophile Island - All pedophiles are sent to live on an isolated island, and a 747 full of Boy Scouts crash lands there and they have to fight to survive (Also a place) (ACS)Anus and Eyeball - Buddy cop TV show duo (ACS)Pussy Pioneer - John Candy's last movie (ACS)Red Velvet - Made up movie character Clown played by Paul Giamatti. "Was secret service, and someone died on his watch. Now he's takin to clownin'." Wears a red velvet clown outfit. (ACS)Destination Of The Semen - (Adam Ray) A movie Harrison Ford passed on twice (ACS)Gay Eye - Movie where Adam plays Buddy McKlan, a racist homophobic mechanic who is blinded in a freak hot transmission fluid accident. He gets the donor eyes from a gay guy who perished on a moped accident in Antigua. Co-starring Larry the Cable Guy as his best friend. (Co-written by Bryan Cranston) (ACS)Grinders - Sitcom where Jon Gruden moves in with Johnny Manziel (ACS)Squishy Red River - Movie that started John Wayne (Show?)Gusset And Cable - Perfect Cop buddy duo team (AOTH)Just One Of The Gays - Stars Shia LaBeouf (ACS)Hard Impact - Sounds like a Van Damme movie from the 90's (ACS)Hammer Pants And Ice - Worst cop detective duo from the 80's (ACS)Living With The Kilowatts - Adam's new animated series where they just leave toaster ovens on all day (ACS)Keep Calm And Rape A Lot - Worst Monty Python film ever (ACS)Medical Mishaps - New show Dave Coulier and Tawny Kitaen could host (ACS)Roaming With Bison - Another great Bill Murray movie (ACS)Gainesville Florida Financial Planner - Sounds like a Saturday Night Live skit (ACS)Blame the Bee Gees - Adam's next documentary (ACS)Adam Knees Your Dad In The Nuts - Adam's new game show (ACS)Navigeddon - Terrorists take over all of the GPS systems of cars, and send them careening into the Grand Canyon (ACS)Rings Of Honor - Terrorists take over Olympic training facility in Colorado Springs, and the athletes have to use their individual skills to escape. (Cameo by Randy Couture as the salty old coach) (ACS)Endless Time/Ample Time For Backup - Adam's new Netflix series (ACS)Tarred n' Feathered - Buddy flick starring a retarded guy and an Indian chief (Show?)Mr. Will Doo And Can Doo - PSA Motivational cartoon bathroom characters Will Doo (Played by Will Arnette) and Can Doo is shaped like a toilet. Filmed in kitschy Clutch Cargo style animation (ADS)Robot Lawyer - Great Phil Hartman bit (ACS)Umpire News Network - Adam's channel with umpires reporting. Unbiased reporting (ACS)Sofa Tard - New CW show coming soon (Matt) (AOTH)Junior Fantasy Island - Show where kids of reckless parents are shipped off to live with Bill Cosby and Felicia Rashad (ADS)2 And A Half Denali's - Hasn't been same since Sheen left (ACS)So Kanye - Sitcom from the 90's (ACS)Ridicuopothy - Sounds like a Mike Judge movie (ADS)Master Buck - One of John Candy's most controversial movies (ACS)LA HOTT (1) - An 80’s bar with an outdoor door seating area (ACS)Mother Hitler - Coming to TNT. Starring Patrick Swayze's bother, Don (ACS)Sink and Bounce - Movie about roller boogie from the 80's, starred Lil' Bow Wow (ACS)The Debs - A made up CW network show where you just put all the hot chicks in Hollywood (ACS)The Origin Story Of AIDS - Worst Marvel movie ever (Bryan)(ACS)Everybody Hates Vinnie - Horrible sitcom (ACS)Chick Clan - Good movie title (ACS)Condo in Redondo - Best movie I ever did (ADS)Red Lobsteria - New show Dr. Drew was talking about where African Americans form their own country (ACS)Earthquake rehab - Reality show Dr. drew seismic expert and a civil engineer come together (Rainn Wilson) (ACS)Rooster Jones - Great John Wayne movie. Super Fly meets True Grit (ACS)Ernest Bigot goes to..... (ACS)Nickels On The Job - First and only Jewish gum shoe on the job. ABC, Friday nights, 10:00 p.m. (ADS)Solicitor General - Great Danny Kaye movie (RD)Disjointed - Lorena Bobbitt biopic (ADS)Habib and Company - Horrible children's show (MS)Bobby's Room - Howie Mandel animated project from the 90's (ACS)Page/Savage - Great cop duo show from the ‘80’s (Adam Ray) (ACS)Paper Asshole - Great Tatum O’Neal film (ACS)L.A. HOTT (2) - Failed Steven Bochco series pilot (ACS)Pieces Of String Too Small To Use - Lena Dunham film from the late 90’s (ACS)Oscar Squad - New Marvel Movie (Gina) (ACS)Cortron/Melamine - Transformers (Gina) (ACS)Anoscope - Worst way to see a movie (ADS)Practical Rapist - New SNL character (Gina) (ACS)Superfoot - Worst Marvel movie ever (Bryan) (ACS)Celebrity Food Chain - Would be a great show (Jeff Cesario) (ACS)Backsack and Anus - Worst cop duo ever (RS)Korean moyle - ABC’s next sitcom (Jeff) ACSNanny Huntin ‘with Ted Nugent - Great reality show I’d watch (ACS)Progressive pope - New sitcom (Gina) ACSNick Mancuso: Construction Fluffer - New TV Show (AONT)Rush Blitzer - Adam’s character from his movie, “Snapper” (BSR)Books/Coffee Table BooksDade County Black Prom, 1985 (ACS)Here Are The Pajamas We Picture You In (ACS)Three Shitty Homes, One Washing Machine, Zero Dryers - Title of Adam's new book (Ray) (AOTH)Chapstick And Batteries - Title of Adam's next bestselling book (ACS)Who The Fuck Put Their Sombrero on My Keys? – Title of Adam’s next book (ACS)Cunt With A Grunt - Adam's favorite Dr. Seuss book (PM)You'll Never See A Cockroach Jog (PM)Kemo Skinny Calves - Adam's new children's book (ADS)You're Dyslexic And I'm Dumb - Adam and John Popper's collaborative next book (ACS)I Get It If You’re GWAR - Adam's next book (ACS)Bulk Magazine - Costco magazine that Jimmy Kimmell graced the cover of twice (ACS)Do You Have To Take Your Top Off To Dye Your Pubes, Drew? (LL)Glamping With Moriah - Adam's new book (ACS)From The Mouths of Babes (Hot Chicks Not Babies) (ACS)(The) Sweet Spot - Adam's next book (Bryan) (ACS)I Thought Things Would Be Better When I Was Rich (ACS)Radio Station Kitchen (ACS)Post-it Notes In Radio Station Kitchens (ACS)Comedy Club Green Rooms And The Sofas That Were Not Made For Them (ACS)Jethro, the Mexican Jew - A great children's book (Gina) (ACS)Professor and the Construction Worker -The worst children's book ever (ACS)Willie and the Weed - Good name for a children's book (ACS)What Black People Think White People Complain About (ACS)Everyone Eventually Becomes The Man (ACS)Recipe for Misery (1) - Name Of Adam’s next book (ACS)In Defense Of Black Face - Adam’s next book (ACS)Hurry Up And Make Sense (2) - Biography title of the Talking Heads (ACS)Native American NamesChief Thunderbear (LL)Dances With Cocks (ACS)Dances With Lipstick (ACS)Ol' Urethra Windows (ACS)Oxnard - Indian name meaning the balls of a bull (ACS)V/P NamesAbsorbent Rag - Good name for T's V (ACS)Hurt Locker - Another name for T's V (ACS)Judge's Mansion - Another name for T's GCmarket.com - Another name for T's V (ACS)City of Industry - Another name for T's V (ACS)Dutch Mook - Another name for T's V (ACS)s VNo Safe Spaces - Great name for T's V (ACS)Hobo Stove - Another name for A's V (ACS)Sausage Grinder - Another name for A's V (ACS)Dixville Notch - Another name for G's V (ACS)Snake River Canyon - Another name for G's V (ACS)Dakota Access Pipeline - Another name for G's V (ACS)The Holidome - Another name for G’s V (ACS)Discovery Bay - Great name for G's V (ACS)B.O. Box - Great name for G's V (ACS)Sea bag - Good name for G's V (ACS)El Portal - Great name for G's V (ACS)Harry Belafonte - Adam's name for his junk, if he were a woman (Show?)Top Gear - Another name for Adam’s junk (ACS)El Gordo/King Taco - Good name for G’s V (ACS)Submitted June 02, 2018 at 02:21PM by Texas1971 https://www.reddit.com/AdamCarolla/comments/8o2hxt/carollaisms\\\\_june/?utm\\\\_source=iftttvia /AdamCarollaSubmitted June 02, 2018 at 02:48PM by peterboykin https://www.reddit.com/MagaFirstNews/comments/8o2oh9/carollaisms\\\_june/?utm\\\_source=iftttvia /MagaFirstNewsSubmitted June 02, 2018 at 05:23PM by peterboykin https://www.reddit.com/MagaFirstNews/comments/8o3pnj/carollaisms\\_june/?utm\\_source=iftttvia /MagaFirstNews
Submitted June 02, 2018 at 07:18PM by peterboykin https://www.reddit.com/MagaFirstNews/comments/8o4g7v/carollaisms\_june/?utm\_source=ifttt
via /MagaFirstNews
submitted by peterboykin to MagaFirstNews [link] [comments]


2018.06.03 01:18 peterboykin Carollaisms J(une)

Carollaisms J(une)
Carollaisms J(une)Carollaisms J(une)Carollaisms (June)Band Names/Rap StarsMitt Romney and the One Percenters (ACS)ManAyz - Rap star (LL)D'Bagz - Rap star (LL)Maxi Pad - An all-girl band that knows how to rock (LL)Dick Tingle - One of the best blues men in the business (Show?)Lynette and the Lackeys (ACS)Straw Hat and the Bowties - Jerry Springer's dixieland band who plays at the Knott's Berry Farm Good Time Theater (ACS)Gut Fluffer (ACS)Johnny Beaumont and The Legionnaires - All wear matching powder blue tuxedoes (ACS)Automatic Vaginismus – Great band name (LL)Dissuade/D’ Suede - Rappeproducer of Kanye/one of Kim's ex beaus (ACS)Starchy Deuce - Band that should be produced by D' Suede (ACS)Narthex - (ACS)Epileptic Declawed Hamster - That is a helluva punk band right there (ACS)Loretta Lynch - Country singer who sang "Stand By Your Man" (ACS)The Areolas - Covered an Eagles song in the ‘90s (ACS)Fleece and Flannel - One of the best lesbian acoustic duos you will ever see (ACS)3 Chainz - Rap star (ACS)Blues Squatter - Adam's dad’s band name (ACS)Tampon Kayak - One of Seattle's greatest, but least heard of indie bands (ACS)Jizz Grenade (LL)Dryer Fire - Hot indie band name (ACS)Iranian Revolutionary Guard - Prince's backup band (ACS)Rape Kit - Name of Adam's band from high school (ACS)Nog Bong - A band Adam was in in high school (ACS)Bum Blazer – Adam’s band in high school (ACS)White Trash Kimchi - Another good band name (Bald Bryan) (ACS)White Noise - Adam's rap name (ADS)Promethazine - Lil Wayne's sister (ADS)Light Rail - Great Rap name (ADS)Danny In The Joint - Good indie band name (ACS)Anal Cleft - One of the worst reggae singers to leave Jamaica (ACS)Anal Cleft and the Taints - Great reggae group (ACS)MEL-ROL - One of The Spice Girls (AOTH)D'bris - Great Rap name (ACS)Cisgender - A militant female rapper....for the ladies (ACS)Krav Maga (1) - Country singing Jew (ACS)Lynette and Paulette - Sounds like a singing duo from the 60's (RD)Nuts In The Sink - Name of Ray’s new band (Ray) (AOTH)SubDude - Pete Holmes' rap name (ACS)Ray And The Enemas - Blues singer and his backup band (ADS)Yakov Crutchfield - He has a show in Branson (ADS)Mac 18 - Adam’s favorite rapper (RD)Tremble Lean – Adam’s rap name (ACBSL)Sticker Back – Worst band out of Canada ever (ACS)Pennywise and Pound Foolish - A band from the ‘90's (RD)Strawberry Shortcake's Neti Pot - Great band name (Twitter)Puffy Elon Musk - Worst rapper ever (ACS)Pantera Club at Laguna Seca (Twitter)Savage Body Attack - New wave romantic band Ace was in when he was 19 (FBL)Jumping Jazzy Jews - Jeff Goldblum's jazz band (ACS)Snore Cherry - Great band name (ACS)Pat Benatard - Pat Benatar cover band (ACS)Rancid Nuts - Good band name (ACS)Gary And The Knotholes - Good band name (AOTH)Tampon Canoe - Good indie band (ACS)One Erection - A good boy band (ACS)Flushin' Dew - A good country duo (ACS)Armo Jeweler - Great band name (RD)Radon - (Lynette thinks) there a Whitesnake cover-band (ACS)The Taste Of Ace - Great band name (ACS)King Grape and the Raisinettes (GS)Concord Grape and the Raisinettes (GS)Gary Taco - Love that band (ACS)The Silence Breakers (2) - Good punk band (Gina) (ACS)Daddy’s Got A Dually – Good country song (ACS)Dip Curtain - Good indie band (ACS)Crystal Lobbyists - Sounds like a great techno band (ACS)Narcissistic Monk -Great indie band (GS)Sporty Prius - Worst of the Spice Girls (ACS)Laden and Bravado - 70s duo who opened for Seals n Crofts (ACS)The Bouncers - great band name (ACS)Hurry up and make sense (1) - a good talking heads album (ACS)Appropriate Sombrero - Maxapada’s next band name (Bryan) (ACS)Flirtatious Contrail - great rap name (GS)Jack Johnson - Guy from The White Stripes aka The Black Stripes (ACS)Song TitlesMeatless Mondays - Horrible Bangles song (Show?)Measles and Commuter Trains - Worst Christmas song ever (ACS)White Guys Be Ownin' Everything - Adam's next hit (ACS)Blood On The Grout - John Cougar Mellencamp song (ACS)No Blood In The Peckeroo - Good John Cougar song (ACS)Mellen's Gold - A three disc box set of nothing but John Cougar Mellencamp hits (ACS)Freaks, Retards and Jews - Not a Cher song (ACS)Pedophile Cops - Good Cheap Trick song (ACS)Pig Anus Soup - Favorite Rolling Stones album (Bryan) (ACS)That Dog Don’t Mess With Olga and Natalia Don’t Spit No Mo’ - Sounds like a Mississippi Delta blues song (Bryan) (ACS)Goggles Are For Pussies - Trace Adkins' number one hit (ACAFBSL)Whistle While You Masturbate - The lost Disney song aka "Whistle While You Jerk" (ACS)12 Pack & Dick's Hard - Name of Adam's new album (Gina) (ACS)Blood and Soil - A good Smithereens song (ACS)Pina Colada in Amsterdam - Worst Jimmy Buffet song ever (ACS)Tough Times In The City - Great Nick Gilder song (ACS)I've Got A Hamster In My Scrotum And He's Looking For His Keys - That's a good country song (ACS)Gay Hitler -Great Elvis Costello song (ACS)Tard On The Tool Shed - Good Mellenamp song (AOTH)Condo in Redondo - Sublime song (ADS)Animoji - Band that sung "Obsession" (ACS)People Who Have Lost People - Worst Barbara Streisand song ever (ACS)Tilted Heart - Great Tammy Wynette song (ADS)Yoga wood - Great Beatles song (ACS)Anal cleft - Song from the Sound of Music (ACS)Morgue Mode - Sounds like a guy from Iceland who is a DJ (ACS)I’ve got a Saturday and two friends - great country song (Gina) (ACS)Recipe for Misery (2) - Title of the next Guns N Roses album (ACS)Circling Back To Baldwin - Good name for a country song (ACS)Keistered in Winnipeg - (Bald’s) favorite Willie Nelson song (ACS)Football Players/Athletes/Teams:Legs Akimbo - Wide Receiver (ACS)Feral Katz - Nose Tackle (ACS)L' Brarian Booker - Wide Receiver (ACS)Oscar Buzz - Linebacker (ACS)DeVigorous Lover - Wide Receiver (ACS)Nadir Zenith - Placekicker (ACS)DeGluten Free - Offensive Lineman (ACS)Tangy Mango - Fullback (ACS)N'Farious Plan - (position?) (ACS)Modular Holmes - (position?) (ACS)Fortuitous Bounce - Safety (ACS)Operatin' Thetan - (ACS) Quarterback for the Washington Redskins (ACS)Minority Banks - HOF OLB who died tragically in a car wreck shortly after his HOF induction, a natural athlete, he played option QB in college along with being a stand out member of the track team, and in high school he was captain of the basketball team. Survived by his twin brother Majority Banks, who also played in the league, and daughter Recuser Banks who many believe was the best athlete in the family (ACS)Coach Platitude - "Take a knee son...helmet's not a chair" (ACS)Glendora Bevmo - Mother of DeVigorous Lover and L' Brarian Booker (different fathers, of course) (ACS)Marshall Law - (Allison) (ACS)Orlando Ceeworld - (position?) (ACS)Du Vatine - (position?) (Show?)Raja Slate - Super fast wide-out out of Marshall via LSU (AOTH)Moe Greene - Great corner for the Washington Redskins in the 80’s (ACS)Bronx Defenders - Sounds like a AAA hockey team (RD)Medical Error - Slipped in the draft due to a video being released just prior (ACS)Homeo Stasis (position?) (ACS)Capybara - The greatest name for a major league skipper (ACS)Ejaxico Johnson (position?) (ACS)Radiant Barrier vs. Attic Fan - The worst WWE matchup ever to grace the stage (AOTH)Bamboo Brick - one of the greatest mixed martial artists on the planet (AOTH)Dexter Methorphan - He did not participate in the combines, but his coaches say he can run a 4.3 (Twitter)Bob Jacuzzi - Great point guard for the Celtics aka "THE COOZE" (ACS)Shame Negation - Picked to leave Clemson early and go very early in the draft this year. (ADS)Entertainment Crackers - Another name for the Washington Generals ACSHardibacker - Good name for an inside backer (ACS)Osmosis - Black dude. Forward for the Knicks who might or might not have been traded (ADS)Onus Wilson - NFL draftee (ACS)World Be Mine - Adam’s new basketball name (ACS)Porn Star Names/Terms/Gay Code:Spoodini - (LL)Rocky Stucco - (AOTH)No Can Doo - Backdoor anal queen of China (ACS)Kristallnacht - Worst porn star name in the business (ACS)Madison Avenue (I am Rappaport Podcast)Hero Du Jour (I am Rappaport Podcast)Kindle Fire (ACS)Jackson Hole - Gay porn actor (ACS)Col. Duke Lacrosse - Adam's porn name (LL)Duke Circumference - Adam's gay porn name (ACS)Rich Data - Gay porn actor (Show?)Tom Foolery - Gay porn actor (Show?)Honey Dijon - Great porn star name (Show?)Aids Machete - One of Adam's gay porn names. "Very short stint, I only did 2 weeks with that name, so it was like 41 movies." (ACS)Bryce Canyon - Great gay porn name (ACS)The Italian Coastguard - A gay move. "Let me just start with basic anal, then I'll slide into the Italian Coast Guard." (ACS)Tetanus Gym - Good gay porn name "Who you working with?" "Tetanus Gym." "Oh boy, make sure you're on top" (ACS)Shared A Back Fence - gay slang (ACS)Mea Culpa - Adam's porn name (ACS)Hand Twins - Gay code (ACS)Backscatter - Porn technology (PM)Cajun Tree Climber - Gay code (AOTH)Snow Blower- Gay code (AOTH)Stump Grinder - Gay code (AOTH)Tumbler And Coaster - Adam's gay slang replacement for "top and bottom" (PM)Go For A Bike Ride - Gay code (ACS)Artie Fartie - Adam's porn name from the 80's (ACS)Road Island Ray - Ray's porn name (AOTH)38KKK -A type of porn that comes out of Kentucky (ACS)Tech Screw - A dirty website for geeks (ACS)Bearvalanche - Worst gay move ever (ACS)Wacked Off Pieces Of Cactus - Gay code for gay rough trade (ACS)Brad Nail - Good gay porn name (ADS)Lightning Rod - Good gay porn name for Milo Yiannopplous (ADS)Milk Barn - Another name for Adam's bathroom sink (ACS)Meat Thievery - That's just good gay code (ACS)Hairy Shin - Adam's gay porn name (ACS)Asian Persuasion - Sounds like a good name for a porn series Asian persuasion 16 (ACS)Cock Holster - Good movie series, cock holster 14 (ACS)Celebrity Du Jour - Great porn name (ACS)Europol - Another great porn name (ACS)Roy Wood - Adam's gay porn name (ACS)Tank slapper - Gay slang (Gina) (ACS)Porch Pirate - Gay term (ACS)Mad Chuck - The world's worst name for a gay porn star (AOTH)Sweat lodge - Gay code (ACS)The L.A. Underground - Sounds like a gay bar (M&J)Skin and grin - Gay slang (ACS)Rear Admiral - The name of one of the best bars on west side (ACS)Loaded for bear - Now a gay term (GS)Fruit Of The Year - A porn Dave (Dameshek) starred in (ACS)The Lebanese Comedian - Ace's favorite sex position (ACS)Cockout - When a gay guy doesn't try very hard (ACS)Margana Wood - Porn name (ACS)Hugh Bris - Porn star (RD)Matte Clear - Fondalier’s gay porn name (AOTH)Palatial Estates – A good 80’s fake tittie porn name (AOTH)Cokie Roberts - Great porn name (ACS)Armenian Christmas - An unspeakable sexual act in prison. "Johnny ratted out the white supremacists to the warden, so they gave him an Armenian Christmas" (Show?)Ride The Pine - Gay slang (ADS)Meet Gaze - Gay slang (ACS)Asshole Rider - Gay slang (ACS)Cash Widedick - Ace's porn name if you can call an apple a honey crisp. (ACS)Shanda Lear - Great stripper name (Gina) (ACS)Fiery Cherry - Good porn name (ACS)Jerk the wheel - Code for masturbation (ACS)Giddyup Titties - Gina’s porn name (Gina) (ACS)French astronaut - Great gay slang (ACS)Mr Bandera - gay code (ACS)Beefmato/Clamato - sounds like names of venerial diseases (ACS)Spanner - Australian gay code (ACS)Rocky tenure - Adam’s gay porn name (ACS)The End Game - One of Stormy Daniels movie titles (RD)Room for cream - Great porno title (Gina) (ACS)Pedialyte shower - Worst sexual act ever (Sklar) (ACS)Foot Zunki - Add-on to the Pedialyte shower (ACS)Self rimming sink - gay slang (AOTH)Harvey Mudd - gay bar drink where vermouth and bartender shit is mixed in a goblet (ACS)Barney’s Beanery - ultimate name for a gay bar (ACS)Parallel park both ways - euphemism for being bi (GS)The Big Three - Gerago’s junk (RD)73 - When a fat guy tries to 69 with a chubby prostitute he met at a ham radio convention(ACS)Backlog - Stormy Daniels movie title (Bryan)(ACS)Miscellaneous PeopleTrajectory Hagar - High school kid "heading down the wrong path" in life (ACS)Slick Mouth - Adam's prison name (ACS)Rich Carless - Cool homeless guy name (ACS)Keyless Chuck - Best homeless guy name (ACS)Nasal Ranger - Worst superhero name ever (Gina) (ACS)Krav Maga (2) - Good name for a sheriff (ADS)Hubcap Annie - Horror that hangs out with Keyless Chuck (ACS)Becky Honkington (Allison) (ACS)Monica Chugscock - (Pronounced "Shuggscawk") (ADS)Tyvek DuPont - Best rich guy’s name (AOTH)Mattress - A Model/actress (ACS)Hofmeister Kink - Nazi war criminal who's been in hiding in Brazil for the past 61 years. aka Jake Johnson (ACS)Serpiginous - The world's wimpiest swordsman. Sir Piginous of Wussville (LL)Chick Fil a - Great play-by-play guy for the Warriors from the 70’s (Show?)Peri Menopausal - Best P.I. working the Chicago beat (LL)Whiskey Dick - The neighborhood pedophile in the clown outfit (ACS)Surge - Guy that drives for ÜBER (ACS)Babbling Brook - Great name for a female cattle auctioneer (PM)Terra Firma - Name of the "woman of color" that heckled Adam at a Ventura live show and was removed by force (The Ranker Podcast)Octomom - Great Batman villain (Bryan) (ACS)Larry The Cabinet Guy - Failed Israeli comic…"Don't get 'er done!" (ACS)Rod Blagojevich - Joe Francis' slimy brother who sells above ground pools out of a primered van (ACS)Cockchug Man - The gay superhero in The Village People that wears just all leather (ACS)MEL-ROL- She's one of The Spice Girls (AOTH)Hand Farts - A new comedian Adam had never heard of (ACS)Juan Jeremy - The greatest international film star ever (ACS)Bitchathane Jackson - Good name for a "sista" (ACS)Tobar - Perfect caveman name (ACS)Vroman - A fast moving Roman (ACS)Korn Syrup and Fructose - Women of color who work at the strip club with Jade (stage 4) (ACS)Fred Meyer - Lucy's neighbor (ACS)Kimchi - The Asian flutist (ACS)Pacoima - The mechanic from Taxi (ACS)Dick Salt - NATO Alliance General (ACS)Dick Salt (2) - Manger of the Mariners in the early 70’s (Bryan) (ACS)Caramel And Fudge - Two more African-American prostitutes that lived in the apartment above Adam’s (ACS)Peaches - The whore that lived upstairs (ACS)F. Me Bailey - Greatest lawyer of all time (RD)Agua Caliente - Loves that guy. He does a great John Madden (ACS)Senior Penis - One the most dangerous drug lords to ever work (ADS)Shill Du'Jour - Good Bond secretary name (RD)Brexit Romero - Sounds like an International assassin (ACS)Lugansk - That gay diver who hit his head and gave the whole Canadian team AIDS (ACS)Leak O'rama - A Dutch action star, starred in “Sudden Death” (AOTH)Vaginismus - Great black guy name (ADS)Normcore - Guy that owns Westwood one (ACS)LaTolstoy - Great black guy name (ACS)Shapiro – Artist who is really good at anime. Died in the 60’s but was a real trendsetter (ACS)Chuck Spears – Good name for a racist. “Hey you workin’ with Chuck Spears over at the Klan?” (ACS)Norethindrone - DAG’s Sister (CLL)La Tuskegee - Black airline pilot (ACS)C-clamps – Nickname for Adam’s step-mom. “Ol’ C-clamps locked me out of the house again.” (ACS)Harry Nilsson - (Gary thinks) he does the voices on The Simpsons (ADS)Nutella - Great name for a crazy black woman (ACS)Sia - The perfect person to break up with. Would be perfect if she was dating Jack (hit the road Jack) (ACS)The Ball Catcher - What Adam used to call Ray's ass in junior high (ACFBSL)MOAB - Matt's new nickname (Mother of All Buttholes) (AONTH)Trip Reeb - Great name for a white guy (ACS)Merle Horn - One of the greatest best ropers to ever come down the Pecos (ACS)The Boring Machine - Lynette's name for Adam (ACS)Avocado Hand - The nickname of Eric Clapton's brother (Chet) who works at a Mexican place and is charge of the guacamole (ACS)Bagel Hand - Clapton's Jewish cousin (ACS)Fa-Sheeya (fascia) - A heavy set woman of color that works at the DMV (ACAFBSL)Ghrelin - New AM/PM mascot (ACS)Krav Maga (3) - An Israeli Captain from 1946 (ACS)Cuban Boa - Sounds like a dark skinned trannie (ACS)Gabardine - She's a very chatty woman of color middle-aged and she'll talk your ear off. (ACS)Guy Dudebro - Greatest name ever (AOTH)Otto Warmbier- Simultaneously the greatest and worst beer master brewer name ever (ACS)Leif Geragos - Greatest rocking attorney ever Viking rocker attorney (ACS)Ernest J. Bigot - "I'm just asking....I'm just wanna know...." (ACS)Panzanella - Cobra's full name (ACS)Sheet Metal Nibbler - Great name for Matt the porcelain punisher (AOTH)Big Grenadine - Sounds like a large black neighbor (ACS)Silent gym - Next to Keyless Chuck, best homeless guy name ever (ACS)Nuchilla - Sounds like a black vampire (Theo Von) (ACS)D' poleon - Black Napoleon (ACS)Luke Rockhold - Sounds like a character on The Flintstones (GS)Sissy squat - She was hot (AOTH)Beulah - The town horror (RD)Ronan Farrow - One of the best wheel men in Europe (ACS)Duke Bagg - Comedian Ian Bagg's brother (ACS)Root ball grinder - A horrible term for a bitchy wife (Ruth Ballgrinder and Harriet Mulcher) (Tim Allen) (ACS)Paul Funyun - Just a big dude who likes to have fun. Has a pink ox as a sidekick (ACS)Page/Savage - A great lawyer team (Adam Ray) (ACS)Ivar the Boneless - Ace’s dad’s nickname in high school. aka Jim the spineless (ACS)Bash Worthy - Comic strip's character name/title (ACS)Uncle Tom-bién - Mexican Uncle Tom (ACS)Alist Poon - An Indian exchange student who has cerebral palsy (ACS)Indignant Asswipes - Good name for an improv troupe (Gina) (ACS)Flora in Fauna - two black chicks that work for him (ADS)Cheap - Name of a he/she that literally went under sexual assignment surgery last month (ACS)Heroin (1)(Pronounced Ehr-o-win by JCVD) A character in Lord Of The Rings (Bryan) (ACS)Yersinia pestis - Ace did Celebrity Apprentice with that dude. He won that year (ADS)Morgue Mode - Sounds like a guy from Iceland who is a DJ (ACS)Rachel Bias - Great stripper name (ACS)Buzz Ramjet - Aviation attorney (ACS)Black Cherry - Stripper name Bryan (ACS)Saffron - Sassy black woman in Meg Whitman movie (ACS)Vibranium - a new black kid name from Black Panther (ACS)Bird Nerd - Marvel superhero (ACS)Morning Zoos/DJ's/Radio StationsGum and Condoms - (Show?)Dusty Labia - Adam's handle when he used to do AM Mornings. (ACS)Asscrack and Backsack in the morning with Sludge (LL)Crockpots and Headphones (ACS)Booger and Floor Wax (ACS)Almonds and Water (ACS)Cold Butter And Calves (ADS)Schluter And The Drain - Schluter has a thick Austrian accent , while "The Drain" has a super low voice (AOTH)Ace Rockolla - Just Google "Ace Rockolla Lightning round...." (LL)Fungus and Mold (Show?)Stupid and Petty (Show?)Eunice and Edgar - Bubba the Love Sponge's parents (ACS)Flip Flops and Fanny Packs (ACS)Hairy Shin - Does a KCRE show in the weekends (ACS)Deep Bra Grooves - Should be a Sirius XM station Channel 248, C+ and above! (ACS)Andy and Opie - Great Radio Show (ACS)QuietRock - Sounds like an easy listening rock station (AOTH)Quiet Crush - A good easy listening radio station (ACS)The Tool Box - SiriusXM took tune station aka KTOL (ACS)Ray's Enema Antics - New podcast on Carolla Digital (Bryan)(ACS)Doug Gets Blown While He Eats Pudding - Doug Benson's next podcast (ACS)Cat Packer - Used to do mornings with her brother, Fudge (ACS)Duke and Shinola - good morning show team (ACS)PlacesBoobville - (LL)Pedoph Isle aka Pedophile Island - Island where are all the pedophiles are sent to live. (Also a TV show/movie idea) (LL)Lil' Lord Fauntleroy’s Academy for Albino Hemophiliacs - Drew's childhood school (LL)Doesntexistizcan - Where presidential candidate Platitude's grandfather was from (ACS)Boga Raton - The world's worst resort spot (Show?)Meat Yard - Great name for a gay bar (ACS)Mister Fister's - Adam's all-time top name for a gay bar (ACS)Sub-Par - Worst name for a submarine sandwich shop (Show?)Queen Mary - Great name for a tranny bar (ACS)NuvaRing - A German racetrack. "The new Nissan GTR turned it in 7:21, faster than the Corvette." (Show?)Louis Pasteur Middle School (ACS)Helm’s Deep - World's first gay bar bakery (ACS)Kal Penn - One of the best sounding names to get an engineering degree from (ACS)Alaska State Motto - Love fishing but I hate your kids? Alaska! (PM)Duke University - John Wayne's college (ACS)Planned Possumhood - Planned Parenthood in Arkansas (ACS)Fruit Stand - Great name for a gay bar (ACS)Poo Poo City - Where Charles Fletcher Loomis' house is located (ACS)Blood Bank - Great name for a check cashing place in the hood (ACS)Bass Manor - Great name for a gay bar (ACS)The Dead C - Sounds like the worst name for a lesbian bar ever (ACS)Wood Bar - Good name for a gay bar (ACS)Ghost Load - Ride at Calico Ghost Town (ADS)Nasacort - Country club for Jewish folks where they play tennis at (ADS)L.A. HOTT (1) - An 80's bar with an outdoor door seating area (ACS)Fairy Wings - Good name for a bar on the west side (ACS)Second Hand/First World - Store that sells rich whitey’s high end stuff (ACS)The Lance Hunter - Perfect name for a gay bar (Dumb People Town)Pervert Park - Theo Vaughn grew up there (ACS)Big Sur - Great name for a big and tall shop (Show?)Studio Centric - Sounds like a Utopia. Between Valley Village and Sherman Oaks (AOTH)Asstard - Thor came from that planet (ACS)Grand Entrance - Great name for a gay bar (AOTH)Thermopolis - Where the Bun Boy is (ACS)The Turkish Embassy - Gay bar (ACS)Low Tide - Gay code for boner in the rear view mirror (ACS)Corumption - On the way to Vegas, where Heidi Fleiss lives with her macaws (ACS)C.C. Fichens - Sounds like a pretzel stand (Gina) (ACS)Timpani Barn - where to get timpani to go, has three big Mexicans in the kitchen (ACS)Heroin (2)(Pronounced Ehr-o-win by JCVD) The health food store in Venice (ACS)Pocket Passers - Next to Mister Fister’s (Gina) (ACS)MiscellaneousCleaning The Pink Turtle - Bryan's name for pleasuring oneself (ACS)Analingus - A new type of breath mint (LL)The Milk Of Arthritic Goats - A rabbi's curse: "May you suckle at the teet of the milk of arthritic goat!!!" (ACS)Carbon Dating - A black dating website (ACS)RU486 - Vanity plate for a guy who runs an abortion clinic (ADS)Jet Green - Amsterdam's Airlines (ACS)Stromer, Oldhafer and Carolla - World's worst law firm (AOTH)Ira Carolla - Sounds like an affliction "Oh my Ira Carolla's acting up" (ACS)Sawjay - Sounds French...gay word for sausage. "I was strokin' this dude’s sawjay" (ACS)Smokeless Cigarette - Name for Dr. Drew's honker after his prostate surgery (ADS)El Niño - Name of "Sinn" strip club DJ's cock (ACS)Blue Man - Crazy hairdresser's macaw who doesn't judge (PM)Lucia - An Italian moped (ACS)American Jewish World Service - A van that's begging to be shot at (ACS)E-aye? - Canadian version of EBay (ACS)Sweatpants Lesbian - What Adam would be. An in-between lesbian. Not a lipstick lesbian, not a butch dyke (ACS)SuckStrong - Bill Clinton's bracelet (ACS)Gaybus - Gay and bogus (ACS)Flappy Bird - The most offensive name for the vagina (ACS)G8 (Summit) - The Pontiac that Oprah gave away on her show (ACS)Oracle A The Delphi - Big new startup company (ADS)Crewkakke - A type of sweater (ACS)The Flying Dutchman - Great name for an Amsterdam airlines (ACS)Cleaning My Chain - Euphemism for beating off (ACS)Awesome Town - A gathering of three or more polar bears (ACS)Avocado - The Greek word for nut sack (ACS)Doucherette - A gum/patch that douchebags chew/use (ACS)Urban Milling -Black guys standing around (AOTH)Synesthesia - When you eat your own hair (ACS)Tuck Rule - When a guy pretends he's a chick and stands in front of the mirror (ACS)My #2 Pencil Is Out Of Lead - Another term for erectile dysfunction (ACS)Float A Bond - When a politician farts (RD)Vaginismus - black people's holiday, accompanied with a lot of ceremonial garb (ADS)Vaseline and Gauze - Elizabeth Taylor's new scent (ACS)Jewber - A drunk on a 10-speed (ACS)Chickpea - What Gina does when we camp (ACS)Oscar Squad (2) - Bad gay code (ACS)Airbus - Worst name for an aircraft. Sounds like “air donkey” (AOTH)Shailene Woodley - Sounds like the most fantastical verb/adverb combo. “I want to Shailene Woodley through a field of poppies with you” (Gina) (Twitter)Asshole Rider (2) - Worst piece of exercise equipment Vinnie’s ever endorsed (ACS)Diario La Prensa - Stealer of the jersey in Spanish (ACS)The Sicilian Fly Swatter - Sounds like a WWF move (Gina) (ACS)Jellyfish - Sounds like something your grandpa would buy for you at the mall (ACS)Fruit Fly - More politically correct term for fag hag (Show?)Jewgling - When a Jew "Googles" their symptoms (ACS)Tavares - David Wild's boner medicine (ACS)Jew -Over - A mulligan from a barmitzva. "Uh, I misread that...can I get a Jew-over?" (ACS)Ossified - That's a Don King word, there (ACS)Zero for Cecil - Worst charity ever (Bald Bryan) (ACS)A++ - A bra that Gina will never see (ACS)Joycelyn - A good name for Curly from the Three Stooges to say (ACS)Phallisee - Latin for "to see the penis" (ADS)Coffee Nap - Euphemism for pooping in your pants (ACS)USS Monitor - Doesn't sound like a ship of war, sounds like a night nurse (ACS)Dotard - A skirt a man wears (ACS)Wilding- Something derogatory that takes place in public pools in certain counties (ACS)Caveat - Latin for shitting on Adam's point (ADS)Festiva - Sounds like a boner medicine (ACS)Depeche Mode - French for “who dealt it?” (ADS)Beefy Clutch – The purse Gina thought Lady Gaga took to the Emmy’s (ACS)Sig Sauer - Something you would yell at Oktoberfest before downing a stiff stein of stout (ACS)Jeans day – Sounds like the special day for your special need son Gene, to raise money (ACS)Wilding - What takes place in public pools in certain counties (GS)4F - Can’t/won’t be eligible for the draft (ACS)Groupie - a kind of fish (ACS)The African chick - Horrible name for a boat (ACS)Inclusion rider - Snowboard for retarded kids (ACS)The Urethra - Bad name for a car (ACS)Mercury retrograde - when you take your index finger and shove it under your sack before you blow, and you belch it up later (ACS)UEFA - Transsexuals playing soccer with a balled up maxi pad (GS)Missed Connections- The worst airline ever (ACS)Carollo - Sounds like a Tool you’d use rarely (ACS)Brembo - that Mexican food company that makes that bread (Matt) (ACS)Futon - Chinese for bear trap (ACS)Food/DrinksDeer Bits - A venison cereal. Made of frosted deer flakes (Show?)Coco Chanel - Nestlé’s newest coffee flavor (ACS)Honey Dicks - Best cereal name ever (ACS)Dawson's Beard - A pudding flavor Ace saw at Whole Foods (ACS)Mighty Mutts - Worst breakfast cereal ever (ADS)Chillax - A cinnamon based drink from "Hector's" country (ACS)Black Dick - An English desert (ACS)Tardy Digression - Sounds like a finger food..."would you like another tardy digression?" "No, I'm saving room for the main meal" (IFYWABC)Double Bird Strike - Mixed drink created by Ace and Teresa. Made with Grey Goose, Wild Turkey, a splash of Canadian Club, and a splash of Hudson River water (ACS)GAYtorade - A sports drink for gay people, because they lose essential body fluids (ACS)University of Illinois At Urbana Champaign - Sounds like a carbonated drink for black people (ACS)Flinch Fuck - Part of a nutritious breakfast, and a healthy relationship (ADS)Phantom Punch - Something Bill Cosby gave his lady friends (ACS)Pansy Sauce - Goes good with some shrimp (ADS)Tilted Pillar - Kick ass IPA (AOTH)Shaver - A good name for a miniature pastrami sandwich (Cousin Sal Show)GPA - Something they add to children's cereal (ACS)Stellwell's - A new low fat snack cracker (ACS)Conchata Ferrell - A great cheese/unwanted cat (ACS)Poopwell's - One of the worst snacks Nabisco has ever put their name on (ACS)Belldini – Latest Taco Bell offering (ACS)Fuzzy Zoeller – Zima with a jigger of peach schnapps (ACS)Millennial Malaise - A sweet honey dipping sauce (ADS)Jelani Cobb - Sounds like an Indian dish (Gina) (ACS)Air Doodle - The very worst Super Bowl snack on the planet (ACS)Faygala - Jewish sports drink (ACS)Stroke Cane - Sounds like some sugary treat, mixed with a reach around (ACS)The Silence Breakers (2) - good name for a mint (ACS)Lesbian Squirt - Sponsor of the Dinah Shore Classic (ACS)Preemptive gay strike - Worst video game ever (ADS)TV Shows/MoviesCunt du' Jour - A great Bond villain name (ACS)Coffee and Donuts - (Charlie Coffee III and Johnny Donetti) Johnny's a tough street wise cop whose jive talking and plays by his own rules and Charlie's super uptight (LL)Pedoph Isle (aka) Pedophile Island - All pedophiles are sent to live on an isolated island, and a 747 full of Boy Scouts crash lands there and they have to fight to survive (Also a place) (ACS)Anus and Eyeball - Buddy cop TV show duo (ACS)Pussy Pioneer - John Candy's last movie (ACS)Red Velvet - Made up movie character Clown played by Paul Giamatti. "Was secret service, and someone died on his watch. Now he's takin to clownin'." Wears a red velvet clown outfit. (ACS)Destination Of The Semen - (Adam Ray) A movie Harrison Ford passed on twice (ACS)Gay Eye - Movie where Adam plays Buddy McKlan, a racist homophobic mechanic who is blinded in a freak hot transmission fluid accident. He gets the donor eyes from a gay guy who perished on a moped accident in Antigua. Co-starring Larry the Cable Guy as his best friend. (Co-written by Bryan Cranston) (ACS)Grinders - Sitcom where Jon Gruden moves in with Johnny Manziel (ACS)Squishy Red River - Movie that started John Wayne (Show?)Gusset And Cable - Perfect Cop buddy duo team (AOTH)Just One Of The Gays - Stars Shia LaBeouf (ACS)Hard Impact - Sounds like a Van Damme movie from the 90's (ACS)Hammer Pants And Ice - Worst cop detective duo from the 80's (ACS)Living With The Kilowatts - Adam's new animated series where they just leave toaster ovens on all day (ACS)Keep Calm And Rape A Lot - Worst Monty Python film ever (ACS)Medical Mishaps - New show Dave Coulier and Tawny Kitaen could host (ACS)Roaming With Bison - Another great Bill Murray movie (ACS)Gainesville Florida Financial Planner - Sounds like a Saturday Night Live skit (ACS)Blame the Bee Gees - Adam's next documentary (ACS)Adam Knees Your Dad In The Nuts - Adam's new game show (ACS)Navigeddon - Terrorists take over all of the GPS systems of cars, and send them careening into the Grand Canyon (ACS)Rings Of Honor - Terrorists take over Olympic training facility in Colorado Springs, and the athletes have to use their individual skills to escape. (Cameo by Randy Couture as the salty old coach) (ACS)Endless Time/Ample Time For Backup - Adam's new Netflix series (ACS)Tarred n' Feathered - Buddy flick starring a retarded guy and an Indian chief (Show?)Mr. Will Doo And Can Doo - PSA Motivational cartoon bathroom characters Will Doo (Played by Will Arnette) and Can Doo is shaped like a toilet. Filmed in kitschy Clutch Cargo style animation (ADS)Robot Lawyer - Great Phil Hartman bit (ACS)Umpire News Network - Adam's channel with umpires reporting. Unbiased reporting (ACS)Sofa Tard - New CW show coming soon (Matt) (AOTH)Junior Fantasy Island - Show where kids of reckless parents are shipped off to live with Bill Cosby and Felicia Rashad (ADS)2 And A Half Denali's - Hasn't been same since Sheen left (ACS)So Kanye - Sitcom from the 90's (ACS)Ridicuopothy - Sounds like a Mike Judge movie (ADS)Master Buck - One of John Candy's most controversial movies (ACS)LA HOTT (1) - An 80’s bar with an outdoor door seating area (ACS)Mother Hitler - Coming to TNT. Starring Patrick Swayze's bother, Don (ACS)Sink and Bounce - Movie about roller boogie from the 80's, starred Lil' Bow Wow (ACS)The Debs - A made up CW network show where you just put all the hot chicks in Hollywood (ACS)The Origin Story Of AIDS - Worst Marvel movie ever (Bryan)(ACS)Everybody Hates Vinnie - Horrible sitcom (ACS)Chick Clan - Good movie title (ACS)Condo in Redondo - Best movie I ever did (ADS)Red Lobsteria - New show Dr. Drew was talking about where African Americans form their own country (ACS)Earthquake rehab - Reality show Dr. drew seismic expert and a civil engineer come together (Rainn Wilson) (ACS)Rooster Jones - Great John Wayne movie. Super Fly meets True Grit (ACS)Ernest Bigot goes to..... (ACS)Nickels On The Job - First and only Jewish gum shoe on the job. ABC, Friday nights, 10:00 p.m. (ADS)Solicitor General - Great Danny Kaye movie (RD)Disjointed - Lorena Bobbitt biopic (ADS)Habib and Company - Horrible children's show (MS)Bobby's Room - Howie Mandel animated project from the 90's (ACS)Page/Savage - Great cop duo show from the ‘80’s (Adam Ray) (ACS)Paper Asshole - Great Tatum O’Neal film (ACS)L.A. HOTT (2) - Failed Steven Bochco series pilot (ACS)Pieces Of String Too Small To Use - Lena Dunham film from the late 90’s (ACS)Oscar Squad - New Marvel Movie (Gina) (ACS)Cortron/Melamine - Transformers (Gina) (ACS)Anoscope - Worst way to see a movie (ADS)Practical Rapist - New SNL character (Gina) (ACS)Superfoot - Worst Marvel movie ever (Bryan) (ACS)Celebrity Food Chain - Would be a great show (Jeff Cesario) (ACS)Backsack and Anus - Worst cop duo ever (RS)Korean moyle - ABC’s next sitcom (Jeff) ACSNanny Huntin ‘with Ted Nugent - Great reality show I’d watch (ACS)Progressive pope - New sitcom (Gina) ACSNick Mancuso: Construction Fluffer - New TV Show (AONT)Rush Blitzer - Adam’s character from his movie, “Snapper” (BSR)Books/Coffee Table BooksDade County Black Prom, 1985 (ACS)Here Are The Pajamas We Picture You In (ACS)Three Shitty Homes, One Washing Machine, Zero Dryers - Title of Adam's new book (Ray) (AOTH)Chapstick And Batteries - Title of Adam's next bestselling book (ACS)Who The Fuck Put Their Sombrero on My Keys? – Title of Adam’s next book (ACS)Cunt With A Grunt - Adam's favorite Dr. Seuss book (PM)You'll Never See A Cockroach Jog (PM)Kemo Skinny Calves - Adam's new children's book (ADS)You're Dyslexic And I'm Dumb - Adam and John Popper's collaborative next book (ACS)I Get It If You’re GWAR - Adam's next book (ACS)Bulk Magazine - Costco magazine that Jimmy Kimmell graced the cover of twice (ACS)Do You Have To Take Your Top Off To Dye Your Pubes, Drew? (LL)Glamping With Moriah - Adam's new book (ACS)From The Mouths of Babes (Hot Chicks Not Babies) (ACS)(The) Sweet Spot - Adam's next book (Bryan) (ACS)I Thought Things Would Be Better When I Was Rich (ACS)Radio Station Kitchen (ACS)Post-it Notes In Radio Station Kitchens (ACS)Comedy Club Green Rooms And The Sofas That Were Not Made For Them (ACS)Jethro, the Mexican Jew - A great children's book (Gina) (ACS)Professor and the Construction Worker -The worst children's book ever (ACS)Willie and the Weed - Good name for a children's book (ACS)What Black People Think White People Complain About (ACS)Everyone Eventually Becomes The Man (ACS)Recipe for Misery (1) - Name Of Adam’s next book (ACS)In Defense Of Black Face - Adam’s next book (ACS)Hurry Up And Make Sense (2) - Biography title of the Talking Heads (ACS)Native American NamesChief Thunderbear (LL)Dances With Cocks (ACS)Dances With Lipstick (ACS)Ol' Urethra Windows (ACS)Oxnard - Indian name meaning the balls of a bull (ACS)V/P NamesAbsorbent Rag - Good name for T's V (ACS)Hurt Locker - Another name for T's V (ACS)Judge's Mansion - Another name for T's GCmarket.com - Another name for T's V (ACS)City of Industry - Another name for T's V (ACS)Dutch Mook - Another name for T's V (ACS)s VNo Safe Spaces - Great name for T's V (ACS)Hobo Stove - Another name for A's V (ACS)Sausage Grinder - Another name for A's V (ACS)Dixville Notch - Another name for G's V (ACS)Snake River Canyon - Another name for G's V (ACS)Dakota Access Pipeline - Another name for G's V (ACS)The Holidome - Another name for G’s V (ACS)Discovery Bay - Great name for G's V (ACS)B.O. Box - Great name for G's V (ACS)Sea bag - Good name for G's V (ACS)El Portal - Great name for G's V (ACS)Harry Belafonte - Adam's name for his junk, if he were a woman (Show?)Top Gear - Another name for Adam’s junk (ACS)El Gordo/King Taco - Good name for G’s V (ACS)Submitted June 02, 2018 at 02:21PM by Texas1971 https://www.reddit.com/AdamCarolla/comments/8o2hxt/carollaisms\\\_june/?utm\\\_source=iftttvia /AdamCarollaSubmitted June 02, 2018 at 02:48PM by peterboykin https://www.reddit.com/MagaFirstNews/comments/8o2oh9/carollaisms\\_june/?utm\\_source=iftttvia /MagaFirstNews
Submitted June 02, 2018 at 05:23PM by peterboykin https://www.reddit.com/MagaFirstNews/comments/8o3pnj/carollaisms\_june/?utm\_source=ifttt
via /MagaFirstNews
submitted by peterboykin to MagaFirstNews [link] [comments]


2018.06.02 23:23 peterboykin Carollaisms J(une)

Carollaisms J(une)
Carollaisms J(une)Carollaisms (June)Band Names/Rap StarsMitt Romney and the One Percenters (ACS)ManAyz - Rap star (LL)D'Bagz - Rap star (LL)Maxi Pad - An all-girl band that knows how to rock (LL)Dick Tingle - One of the best blues men in the business (Show?)Lynette and the Lackeys (ACS)Straw Hat and the Bowties - Jerry Springer's dixieland band who plays at the Knott's Berry Farm Good Time Theater (ACS)Gut Fluffer (ACS)Johnny Beaumont and The Legionnaires - All wear matching powder blue tuxedoes (ACS)Automatic Vaginismus – Great band name (LL)Dissuade/D’ Suede - Rappeproducer of Kanye/one of Kim's ex beaus (ACS)Starchy Deuce - Band that should be produced by D' Suede (ACS)Narthex - (ACS)Epileptic Declawed Hamster - That is a helluva punk band right there (ACS)Loretta Lynch - Country singer who sang "Stand By Your Man" (ACS)The Areolas - Covered an Eagles song in the ‘90s (ACS)Fleece and Flannel - One of the best lesbian acoustic duos you will ever see (ACS)3 Chainz - Rap star (ACS)Blues Squatter - Adam's dad’s band name (ACS)Tampon Kayak - One of Seattle's greatest, but least heard of indie bands (ACS)Jizz Grenade (LL)Dryer Fire - Hot indie band name (ACS)Iranian Revolutionary Guard - Prince's backup band (ACS)Rape Kit - Name of Adam's band from high school (ACS)Nog Bong - A band Adam was in in high school (ACS)Bum Blazer – Adam’s band in high school (ACS)White Trash Kimchi - Another good band name (Bald Bryan) (ACS)White Noise - Adam's rap name (ADS)Promethazine - Lil Wayne's sister (ADS)Light Rail - Great Rap name (ADS)Danny In The Joint - Good indie band name (ACS)Anal Cleft - One of the worst reggae singers to leave Jamaica (ACS)Anal Cleft and the Taints - Great reggae group (ACS)MEL-ROL - One of The Spice Girls (AOTH)D'bris - Great Rap name (ACS)Cisgender - A militant female rapper....for the ladies (ACS)Krav Maga (1) - Country singing Jew (ACS)Lynette and Paulette - Sounds like a singing duo from the 60's (RD)Nuts In The Sink - Name of Ray’s new band (Ray) (AOTH)SubDude - Pete Holmes' rap name (ACS)Ray And The Enemas - Blues singer and his backup band (ADS)Yakov Crutchfield - He has a show in Branson (ADS)Mac 18 - Adam’s favorite rapper (RD)Tremble Lean – Adam’s rap name (ACBSL)Sticker Back – Worst band out of Canada ever (ACS)Pennywise and Pound Foolish - A band from the ‘90's (RD)Strawberry Shortcake's Neti Pot - Great band name (Twitter)Puffy Elon Musk - Worst rapper ever (ACS)Pantera Club at Laguna Seca (Twitter)Savage Body Attack - New wave romantic band Ace was in when he was 19 (FBL)Jumping Jazzy Jews - Jeff Goldblum's jazz band (ACS)Snore Cherry - Great band name (ACS)Pat Benatard - Pat Benatar cover band (ACS)Rancid Nuts - Good band name (ACS)Gary And The Knotholes - Good band name (AOTH)Tampon Canoe - Good indie band (ACS)One Erection - A good boy band (ACS)Flushin' Dew - A good country duo (ACS)Armo Jeweler - Great band name (RD)Radon - (Lynette thinks) there a Whitesnake cover-band (ACS)The Taste Of Ace - Great band name (ACS)King Grape and the Raisinettes (GS)Concord Grape and the Raisinettes (GS)Gary Taco - Love that band (ACS)The Silence Breakers (2) - Good punk band (Gina) (ACS)Daddy’s Got A Dually – Good country song (ACS)Dip Curtain - Good indie band (ACS)Crystal Lobbyists - Sounds like a great techno band (ACS)Narcissistic Monk -Great indie band (GS)Sporty Prius - Worst of the Spice Girls (ACS)Laden and Bravado - 70s duo who opened for Seals n Crofts (ACS)The Bouncers - great band name (ACS)Hurry up and make sense (1) - a good talking heads album (ACS)Appropriate Sombrero - Maxapada’s next band name (Bryan) (ACS)Flirtatious Contrail - great rap name (GS)Jack Johnson - Guy from The White Stripes aka The Black Stripes (ACS)Song TitlesMeatless Mondays - Horrible Bangles song (Show?)Measles and Commuter Trains - Worst Christmas song ever (ACS)White Guys Be Ownin' Everything - Adam's next hit (ACS)Blood On The Grout - John Cougar Mellencamp song (ACS)No Blood In The Peckeroo - Good John Cougar song (ACS)Mellen's Gold - A three disc box set of nothing but John Cougar Mellencamp hits (ACS)Freaks, Retards and Jews - Not a Cher song (ACS)Pedophile Cops - Good Cheap Trick song (ACS)Pig Anus Soup - Favorite Rolling Stones album (Bryan) (ACS)That Dog Don’t Mess With Olga and Natalia Don’t Spit No Mo’ - Sounds like a Mississippi Delta blues song (Bryan) (ACS)Goggles Are For Pussies - Trace Adkins' number one hit (ACAFBSL)Whistle While You Masturbate - The lost Disney song aka "Whistle While You Jerk" (ACS)12 Pack & Dick's Hard - Name of Adam's new album (Gina) (ACS)Blood and Soil - A good Smithereens song (ACS)Pina Colada in Amsterdam - Worst Jimmy Buffet song ever (ACS)Tough Times In The City - Great Nick Gilder song (ACS)I've Got A Hamster In My Scrotum And He's Looking For His Keys - That's a good country song (ACS)Gay Hitler -Great Elvis Costello song (ACS)Tard On The Tool Shed - Good Mellenamp song (AOTH)Condo in Redondo - Sublime song (ADS)Animoji - Band that sung "Obsession" (ACS)People Who Have Lost People - Worst Barbara Streisand song ever (ACS)Tilted Heart - Great Tammy Wynette song (ADS)Yoga wood - Great Beatles song (ACS)Anal cleft - Song from the Sound of Music (ACS)Morgue Mode - Sounds like a guy from Iceland who is a DJ (ACS)I’ve got a Saturday and two friends - great country song (Gina) (ACS)Recipe for Misery (2) - Title of the next Guns N Roses album (ACS)Circling Back To Baldwin - Good name for a country song (ACS)Keistered in Winnipeg - (Bald’s) favorite Willie Nelson song (ACS)Football Players/Athletes/Teams:Legs Akimbo - Wide Receiver (ACS)Feral Katz - Nose Tackle (ACS)L' Brarian Booker - Wide Receiver (ACS)Oscar Buzz - Linebacker (ACS)DeVigorous Lover - Wide Receiver (ACS)Nadir Zenith - Placekicker (ACS)DeGluten Free - Offensive Lineman (ACS)Tangy Mango - Fullback (ACS)N'Farious Plan - (position?) (ACS)Modular Holmes - (position?) (ACS)Fortuitous Bounce - Safety (ACS)Operatin' Thetan - (ACS) Quarterback for the Washington Redskins (ACS)Minority Banks - HOF OLB who died tragically in a car wreck shortly after his HOF induction, a natural athlete, he played option QB in college along with being a stand out member of the track team, and in high school he was captain of the basketball team. Survived by his twin brother Majority Banks, who also played in the league, and daughter Recuser Banks who many believe was the best athlete in the family (ACS)Coach Platitude - "Take a knee son...helmet's not a chair" (ACS)Glendora Bevmo - Mother of DeVigorous Lover and L' Brarian Booker (different fathers, of course) (ACS)Marshall Law - (Allison) (ACS)Orlando Ceeworld - (position?) (ACS)Du Vatine - (position?) (Show?)Raja Slate - Super fast wide-out out of Marshall via LSU (AOTH)Moe Greene - Great corner for the Washington Redskins in the 80’s (ACS)Bronx Defenders - Sounds like a AAA hockey team (RD)Medical Error - Slipped in the draft due to a video being released just prior (ACS)Homeo Stasis (position?) (ACS)Capybara - The greatest name for a major league skipper (ACS)Ejaxico Johnson (position?) (ACS)Radiant Barrier vs. Attic Fan - The worst WWE matchup ever to grace the stage (AOTH)Bamboo Brick - one of the greatest mixed martial artists on the planet (AOTH)Dexter Methorphan - He did not participate in the combines, but his coaches say he can run a 4.3 (Twitter)Bob Jacuzzi - Great point guard for the Celtics aka "THE COOZE" (ACS)Shame Negation - Picked to leave Clemson early and go very early in the draft this year. (ADS)Entertainment Crackers - Another name for the Washington Generals ACSHardibacker - Good name for an inside backer (ACS)Osmosis - Black dude. Forward for the Knicks who might or might not have been traded (ADS)Onus Wilson - NFL draftee (ACS)World Be Mine - Adam’s new basketball name (ACS)Porn Star Names/Terms/Gay Code:Spoodini - (LL)Rocky Stucco - (AOTH)No Can Doo - Backdoor anal queen of China (ACS)Kristallnacht - Worst porn star name in the business (ACS)Madison Avenue (I am Rappaport Podcast)Hero Du Jour (I am Rappaport Podcast)Kindle Fire (ACS)Jackson Hole - Gay porn actor (ACS)Col. Duke Lacrosse - Adam's porn name (LL)Duke Circumference - Adam's gay porn name (ACS)Rich Data - Gay porn actor (Show?)Tom Foolery - Gay porn actor (Show?)Honey Dijon - Great porn star name (Show?)Aids Machete - One of Adam's gay porn names. "Very short stint, I only did 2 weeks with that name, so it was like 41 movies." (ACS)Bryce Canyon - Great gay porn name (ACS)The Italian Coastguard - A gay move. "Let me just start with basic anal, then I'll slide into the Italian Coast Guard." (ACS)Tetanus Gym - Good gay porn name "Who you working with?" "Tetanus Gym." "Oh boy, make sure you're on top" (ACS)Shared A Back Fence - gay slang (ACS)Mea Culpa - Adam's porn name (ACS)Hand Twins - Gay code (ACS)Backscatter - Porn technology (PM)Cajun Tree Climber - Gay code (AOTH)Snow Blower- Gay code (AOTH)Stump Grinder - Gay code (AOTH)Tumbler And Coaster - Adam's gay slang replacement for "top and bottom" (PM)Go For A Bike Ride - Gay code (ACS)Artie Fartie - Adam's porn name from the 80's (ACS)Road Island Ray - Ray's porn name (AOTH)38KKK -A type of porn that comes out of Kentucky (ACS)Tech Screw - A dirty website for geeks (ACS)Bearvalanche - Worst gay move ever (ACS)Wacked Off Pieces Of Cactus - Gay code for gay rough trade (ACS)Brad Nail - Good gay porn name (ADS)Lightning Rod - Good gay porn name for Milo Yiannopplous (ADS)Milk Barn - Another name for Adam's bathroom sink (ACS)Meat Thievery - That's just good gay code (ACS)Hairy Shin - Adam's gay porn name (ACS)Asian Persuasion - Sounds like a good name for a porn series Asian persuasion 16 (ACS)Cock Holster - Good movie series, cock holster 14 (ACS)Celebrity Du Jour - Great porn name (ACS)Europol - Another great porn name (ACS)Roy Wood - Adam's gay porn name (ACS)Tank slapper - Gay slang (Gina) (ACS)Porch Pirate - Gay term (ACS)Mad Chuck - The world's worst name for a gay porn star (AOTH)Sweat lodge - Gay code (ACS)The L.A. Underground - Sounds like a gay bar (M&J)Skin and grin - Gay slang (ACS)Rear Admiral - The name of one of the best bars on west side (ACS)Loaded for bear - Now a gay term (GS)Fruit Of The Year - A porn Dave (Dameshek) starred in (ACS)The Lebanese Comedian - Ace's favorite sex position (ACS)Cockout - When a gay guy doesn't try very hard (ACS)Margana Wood - Porn name (ACS)Hugh Bris - Porn star (RD)Matte Clear - Fondalier’s gay porn name (AOTH)Palatial Estates – A good 80’s fake tittie porn name (AOTH)Cokie Roberts - Great porn name (ACS)Armenian Christmas - An unspeakable sexual act in prison. "Johnny ratted out the white supremacists to the warden, so they gave him an Armenian Christmas" (Show?)Ride The Pine - Gay slang (ADS)Meet Gaze - Gay slang (ACS)Asshole Rider - Gay slang (ACS)Cash Widedick - Ace's porn name if you can call an apple a honey crisp. (ACS)Shanda Lear - Great stripper name (Gina) (ACS)Fiery Cherry - Good porn name (ACS)Jerk the wheel - Code for masturbation (ACS)Giddyup Titties - Gina’s porn name (Gina) (ACS)French astronaut - Great gay slang (ACS)Mr Bandera - gay code (ACS)Beefmato/Clamato - sounds like names of venerial diseases (ACS)Spanner - Australian gay code (ACS)Rocky tenure - Adam’s gay porn name (ACS)The End Game - One of Stormy Daniels movie titles (RD)Room for cream - Great porno title (Gina) (ACS)Pedialyte shower - Worst sexual act ever (Sklar) (ACS)Foot Zunki - Add-on to the Pedialyte shower (ACS)Self rimming sink - gay slang (AOTH)Harvey Mudd - gay bar drink where vermouth and bartender shit is mixed in a goblet (ACS)Barney’s Beanery - ultimate name for a gay bar (ACS)Parallel park both ways - euphemism for being bi (GS)The Big Three - Gerago’s junk (RD)73 - When a fat guy tries to 69 with a chubby prostitute he met at a ham radio convention(ACS)Backlog - Stormy Daniels movie title (Bryan)(ACS)Miscellaneous PeopleTrajectory Hagar - High school kid "heading down the wrong path" in life (ACS)Slick Mouth - Adam's prison name (ACS)Rich Carless - Cool homeless guy name (ACS)Keyless Chuck - Best homeless guy name (ACS)Nasal Ranger - Worst superhero name ever (Gina) (ACS)Krav Maga (2) - Good name for a sheriff (ADS)Hubcap Annie - Horror that hangs out with Keyless Chuck (ACS)Becky Honkington (Allison) (ACS)Monica Chugscock - (Pronounced "Shuggscawk") (ADS)Tyvek DuPont - Best rich guy’s name (AOTH)Mattress - A Model/actress (ACS)Hofmeister Kink - Nazi war criminal who's been in hiding in Brazil for the past 61 years. aka Jake Johnson (ACS)Serpiginous - The world's wimpiest swordsman. Sir Piginous of Wussville (LL)Chick Fil a - Great play-by-play guy for the Warriors from the 70’s (Show?)Peri Menopausal - Best P.I. working the Chicago beat (LL)Whiskey Dick - The neighborhood pedophile in the clown outfit (ACS)Surge - Guy that drives for ÜBER (ACS)Babbling Brook - Great name for a female cattle auctioneer (PM)Terra Firma - Name of the "woman of color" that heckled Adam at a Ventura live show and was removed by force (The Ranker Podcast)Octomom - Great Batman villain (Bryan) (ACS)Larry The Cabinet Guy - Failed Israeli comic…"Don't get 'er done!" (ACS)Rod Blagojevich - Joe Francis' slimy brother who sells above ground pools out of a primered van (ACS)Cockchug Man - The gay superhero in The Village People that wears just all leather (ACS)MEL-ROL- She's one of The Spice Girls (AOTH)Hand Farts - A new comedian Adam had never heard of (ACS)Juan Jeremy - The greatest international film star ever (ACS)Bitchathane Jackson - Good name for a "sista" (ACS)Tobar - Perfect caveman name (ACS)Vroman - A fast moving Roman (ACS)Korn Syrup and Fructose - Women of color who work at the strip club with Jade (stage 4) (ACS)Fred Meyer - Lucy's neighbor (ACS)Kimchi - The Asian flutist (ACS)Pacoima - The mechanic from Taxi (ACS)Dick Salt - NATO Alliance General (ACS)Dick Salt (2) - Manger of the Mariners in the early 70’s (Bryan) (ACS)Caramel And Fudge - Two more African-American prostitutes that lived in the apartment above Adam’s (ACS)Peaches - The whore that lived upstairs (ACS)F. Me Bailey - Greatest lawyer of all time (RD)Agua Caliente - Loves that guy. He does a great John Madden (ACS)Senior Penis - One the most dangerous drug lords to ever work (ADS)Shill Du'Jour - Good Bond secretary name (RD)Brexit Romero - Sounds like an International assassin (ACS)Lugansk - That gay diver who hit his head and gave the whole Canadian team AIDS (ACS)Leak O'rama - A Dutch action star, starred in “Sudden Death” (AOTH)Vaginismus - Great black guy name (ADS)Normcore - Guy that owns Westwood one (ACS)LaTolstoy - Great black guy name (ACS)Shapiro – Artist who is really good at anime. Died in the 60’s but was a real trendsetter (ACS)Chuck Spears – Good name for a racist. “Hey you workin’ with Chuck Spears over at the Klan?” (ACS)Norethindrone - DAG’s Sister (CLL)La Tuskegee - Black airline pilot (ACS)C-clamps – Nickname for Adam’s step-mom. “Ol’ C-clamps locked me out of the house again.” (ACS)Harry Nilsson - (Gary thinks) he does the voices on The Simpsons (ADS)Nutella - Great name for a crazy black woman (ACS)Sia - The perfect person to break up with. Would be perfect if she was dating Jack (hit the road Jack) (ACS)The Ball Catcher - What Adam used to call Ray's ass in junior high (ACFBSL)MOAB - Matt's new nickname (Mother of All Buttholes) (AONTH)Trip Reeb - Great name for a white guy (ACS)Merle Horn - One of the greatest best ropers to ever come down the Pecos (ACS)The Boring Machine - Lynette's name for Adam (ACS)Avocado Hand - The nickname of Eric Clapton's brother (Chet) who works at a Mexican place and is charge of the guacamole (ACS)Bagel Hand - Clapton's Jewish cousin (ACS)Fa-Sheeya (fascia) - A heavy set woman of color that works at the DMV (ACAFBSL)Ghrelin - New AM/PM mascot (ACS)Krav Maga (3) - An Israeli Captain from 1946 (ACS)Cuban Boa - Sounds like a dark skinned trannie (ACS)Gabardine - She's a very chatty woman of color middle-aged and she'll talk your ear off. (ACS)Guy Dudebro - Greatest name ever (AOTH)Otto Warmbier- Simultaneously the greatest and worst beer master brewer name ever (ACS)Leif Geragos - Greatest rocking attorney ever Viking rocker attorney (ACS)Ernest J. Bigot - "I'm just asking....I'm just wanna know...." (ACS)Panzanella - Cobra's full name (ACS)Sheet Metal Nibbler - Great name for Matt the porcelain punisher (AOTH)Big Grenadine - Sounds like a large black neighbor (ACS)Silent gym - Next to Keyless Chuck, best homeless guy name ever (ACS)Nuchilla - Sounds like a black vampire (Theo Von) (ACS)D' poleon - Black Napoleon (ACS)Luke Rockhold - Sounds like a character on The Flintstones (GS)Sissy squat - She was hot (AOTH)Beulah - The town horror (RD)Ronan Farrow - One of the best wheel men in Europe (ACS)Duke Bagg - Comedian Ian Bagg's brother (ACS)Root ball grinder - A horrible term for a bitchy wife (Ruth Ballgrinder and Harriet Mulcher) (Tim Allen) (ACS)Paul Funyun - Just a big dude who likes to have fun. Has a pink ox as a sidekick (ACS)Page/Savage - A great lawyer team (Adam Ray) (ACS)Ivar the Boneless - Ace’s dad’s nickname in high school. aka Jim the spineless (ACS)Bash Worthy - Comic strip's character name/title (ACS)Uncle Tom-bién - Mexican Uncle Tom (ACS)Alist Poon - An Indian exchange student who has cerebral palsy (ACS)Indignant Asswipes - Good name for an improv troupe (Gina) (ACS)Flora in Fauna - two black chicks that work for him (ADS)Cheap - Name of a he/she that literally went under sexual assignment surgery last month (ACS)Heroin (1)(Pronounced Ehr-o-win by JCVD) A character in Lord Of The Rings (Bryan) (ACS)Yersinia pestis - Ace did Celebrity Apprentice with that dude. He won that year (ADS)Morgue Mode - Sounds like a guy from Iceland who is a DJ (ACS)Rachel Bias - Great stripper name (ACS)Buzz Ramjet - Aviation attorney (ACS)Black Cherry - Stripper name Bryan (ACS)Saffron - Sassy black woman in Meg Whitman movie (ACS)Vibranium - a new black kid name from Black Panther (ACS)Bird Nerd - Marvel superhero (ACS)Morning Zoos/DJ's/Radio StationsGum and Condoms - (Show?)Dusty Labia - Adam's handle when he used to do AM Mornings. (ACS)Asscrack and Backsack in the morning with Sludge (LL)Crockpots and Headphones (ACS)Booger and Floor Wax (ACS)Almonds and Water (ACS)Cold Butter And Calves (ADS)Schluter And The Drain - Schluter has a thick Austrian accent , while "The Drain" has a super low voice (AOTH)Ace Rockolla - Just Google "Ace Rockolla Lightning round...." (LL)Fungus and Mold (Show?)Stupid and Petty (Show?)Eunice and Edgar - Bubba the Love Sponge's parents (ACS)Flip Flops and Fanny Packs (ACS)Hairy Shin - Does a KCRE show in the weekends (ACS)Deep Bra Grooves - Should be a Sirius XM station Channel 248, C+ and above! (ACS)Andy and Opie - Great Radio Show (ACS)QuietRock - Sounds like an easy listening rock station (AOTH)Quiet Crush - A good easy listening radio station (ACS)The Tool Box - SiriusXM took tune station aka KTOL (ACS)Ray's Enema Antics - New podcast on Carolla Digital (Bryan)(ACS)Doug Gets Blown While He Eats Pudding - Doug Benson's next podcast (ACS)Cat Packer - Used to do mornings with her brother, Fudge (ACS)Duke and Shinola - good morning show team (ACS)PlacesBoobville - (LL)Pedoph Isle aka Pedophile Island - Island where are all the pedophiles are sent to live. (Also a TV show/movie idea) (LL)Lil' Lord Fauntleroy’s Academy for Albino Hemophiliacs - Drew's childhood school (LL)Doesntexistizcan - Where presidential candidate Platitude's grandfather was from (ACS)Boga Raton - The world's worst resort spot (Show?)Meat Yard - Great name for a gay bar (ACS)Mister Fister's - Adam's all-time top name for a gay bar (ACS)Sub-Par - Worst name for a submarine sandwich shop (Show?)Queen Mary - Great name for a tranny bar (ACS)NuvaRing - A German racetrack. "The new Nissan GTR turned it in 7:21, faster than the Corvette." (Show?)Louis Pasteur Middle School (ACS)Helm’s Deep - World's first gay bar bakery (ACS)Kal Penn - One of the best sounding names to get an engineering degree from (ACS)Alaska State Motto - Love fishing but I hate your kids? Alaska! (PM)Duke University - John Wayne's college (ACS)Planned Possumhood - Planned Parenthood in Arkansas (ACS)Fruit Stand - Great name for a gay bar (ACS)Poo Poo City - Where Charles Fletcher Loomis' house is located (ACS)Blood Bank - Great name for a check cashing place in the hood (ACS)Bass Manor - Great name for a gay bar (ACS)The Dead C - Sounds like the worst name for a lesbian bar ever (ACS)Wood Bar - Good name for a gay bar (ACS)Ghost Load - Ride at Calico Ghost Town (ADS)Nasacort - Country club for Jewish folks where they play tennis at (ADS)L.A. HOTT (1) - An 80's bar with an outdoor door seating area (ACS)Fairy Wings - Good name for a bar on the west side (ACS)Second Hand/First World - Store that sells rich whitey’s high end stuff (ACS)The Lance Hunter - Perfect name for a gay bar (Dumb People Town)Pervert Park - Theo Vaughn grew up there (ACS)Big Sur - Great name for a big and tall shop (Show?)Studio Centric - Sounds like a Utopia. Between Valley Village and Sherman Oaks (AOTH)Asstard - Thor came from that planet (ACS)Grand Entrance - Great name for a gay bar (AOTH)Thermopolis - Where the Bun Boy is (ACS)The Turkish Embassy - Gay bar (ACS)Low Tide - Gay code for boner in the rear view mirror (ACS)Corumption - On the way to Vegas, where Heidi Fleiss lives with her macaws (ACS)C.C. Fichens - Sounds like a pretzel stand (Gina) (ACS)Timpani Barn - where to get timpani to go, has three big Mexicans in the kitchen (ACS)Heroin (2)(Pronounced Ehr-o-win by JCVD) The health food store in Venice (ACS)Pocket Passers - Next to Mister Fister’s (Gina) (ACS)MiscellaneousCleaning The Pink Turtle - Bryan's name for pleasuring oneself (ACS)Analingus - A new type of breath mint (LL)The Milk Of Arthritic Goats - A rabbi's curse: "May you suckle at the teet of the milk of arthritic goat!!!" (ACS)Carbon Dating - A black dating website (ACS)RU486 - Vanity plate for a guy who runs an abortion clinic (ADS)Jet Green - Amsterdam's Airlines (ACS)Stromer, Oldhafer and Carolla - World's worst law firm (AOTH)Ira Carolla - Sounds like an affliction "Oh my Ira Carolla's acting up" (ACS)Sawjay - Sounds French...gay word for sausage. "I was strokin' this dude’s sawjay" (ACS)Smokeless Cigarette - Name for Dr. Drew's honker after his prostate surgery (ADS)El Niño - Name of "Sinn" strip club DJ's cock (ACS)Blue Man - Crazy hairdresser's macaw who doesn't judge (PM)Lucia - An Italian moped (ACS)American Jewish World Service - A van that's begging to be shot at (ACS)E-aye? - Canadian version of EBay (ACS)Sweatpants Lesbian - What Adam would be. An in-between lesbian. Not a lipstick lesbian, not a butch dyke (ACS)SuckStrong - Bill Clinton's bracelet (ACS)Gaybus - Gay and bogus (ACS)Flappy Bird - The most offensive name for the vagina (ACS)G8 (Summit) - The Pontiac that Oprah gave away on her show (ACS)Oracle A The Delphi - Big new startup company (ADS)Crewkakke - A type of sweater (ACS)The Flying Dutchman - Great name for an Amsterdam airlines (ACS)Cleaning My Chain - Euphemism for beating off (ACS)Awesome Town - A gathering of three or more polar bears (ACS)Avocado - The Greek word for nut sack (ACS)Doucherette - A gum/patch that douchebags chew/use (ACS)Urban Milling -Black guys standing around (AOTH)Synesthesia - When you eat your own hair (ACS)Tuck Rule - When a guy pretends he's a chick and stands in front of the mirror (ACS)My #2 Pencil Is Out Of Lead - Another term for erectile dysfunction (ACS)Float A Bond - When a politician farts (RD)Vaginismus - black people's holiday, accompanied with a lot of ceremonial garb (ADS)Vaseline and Gauze - Elizabeth Taylor's new scent (ACS)Jewber - A drunk on a 10-speed (ACS)Chickpea - What Gina does when we camp (ACS)Oscar Squad (2) - Bad gay code (ACS)Airbus - Worst name for an aircraft. Sounds like “air donkey” (AOTH)Shailene Woodley - Sounds like the most fantastical verb/adverb combo. “I want to Shailene Woodley through a field of poppies with you” (Gina) (Twitter)Asshole Rider (2) - Worst piece of exercise equipment Vinnie’s ever endorsed (ACS)Diario La Prensa - Stealer of the jersey in Spanish (ACS)The Sicilian Fly Swatter - Sounds like a WWF move (Gina) (ACS)Jellyfish - Sounds like something your grandpa would buy for you at the mall (ACS)Fruit Fly - More politically correct term for fag hag (Show?)Jewgling - When a Jew "Googles" their symptoms (ACS)Tavares - David Wild's boner medicine (ACS)Jew -Over - A mulligan from a barmitzva. "Uh, I misread that...can I get a Jew-over?" (ACS)Ossified - That's a Don King word, there (ACS)Zero for Cecil - Worst charity ever (Bald Bryan) (ACS)A++ - A bra that Gina will never see (ACS)Joycelyn - A good name for Curly from the Three Stooges to say (ACS)Phallisee - Latin for "to see the penis" (ADS)Coffee Nap - Euphemism for pooping in your pants (ACS)USS Monitor - Doesn't sound like a ship of war, sounds like a night nurse (ACS)Dotard - A skirt a man wears (ACS)Wilding- Something derogatory that takes place in public pools in certain counties (ACS)Caveat - Latin for shitting on Adam's point (ADS)Festiva - Sounds like a boner medicine (ACS)Depeche Mode - French for “who dealt it?” (ADS)Beefy Clutch – The purse Gina thought Lady Gaga took to the Emmy’s (ACS)Sig Sauer - Something you would yell at Oktoberfest before downing a stiff stein of stout (ACS)Jeans day – Sounds like the special day for your special need son Gene, to raise money (ACS)Wilding - What takes place in public pools in certain counties (GS)4F - Can’t/won’t be eligible for the draft (ACS)Groupie - a kind of fish (ACS)The African chick - Horrible name for a boat (ACS)Inclusion rider - Snowboard for retarded kids (ACS)The Urethra - Bad name for a car (ACS)Mercury retrograde - when you take your index finger and shove it under your sack before you blow, and you belch it up later (ACS)UEFA - Transsexuals playing soccer with a balled up maxi pad (GS)Missed Connections- The worst airline ever (ACS)Carollo - Sounds like a Tool you’d use rarely (ACS)Brembo - that Mexican food company that makes that bread (Matt) (ACS)Futon - Chinese for bear trap (ACS)Food/DrinksDeer Bits - A venison cereal. Made of frosted deer flakes (Show?)Coco Chanel - Nestlé’s newest coffee flavor (ACS)Honey Dicks - Best cereal name ever (ACS)Dawson's Beard - A pudding flavor Ace saw at Whole Foods (ACS)Mighty Mutts - Worst breakfast cereal ever (ADS)Chillax - A cinnamon based drink from "Hector's" country (ACS)Black Dick - An English desert (ACS)Tardy Digression - Sounds like a finger food..."would you like another tardy digression?" "No, I'm saving room for the main meal" (IFYWABC)Double Bird Strike - Mixed drink created by Ace and Teresa. Made with Grey Goose, Wild Turkey, a splash of Canadian Club, and a splash of Hudson River water (ACS)GAYtorade - A sports drink for gay people, because they lose essential body fluids (ACS)University of Illinois At Urbana Champaign - Sounds like a carbonated drink for black people (ACS)Flinch Fuck - Part of a nutritious breakfast, and a healthy relationship (ADS)Phantom Punch - Something Bill Cosby gave his lady friends (ACS)Pansy Sauce - Goes good with some shrimp (ADS)Tilted Pillar - Kick ass IPA (AOTH)Shaver - A good name for a miniature pastrami sandwich (Cousin Sal Show)GPA - Something they add to children's cereal (ACS)Stellwell's - A new low fat snack cracker (ACS)Conchata Ferrell - A great cheese/unwanted cat (ACS)Poopwell's - One of the worst snacks Nabisco has ever put their name on (ACS)Belldini – Latest Taco Bell offering (ACS)Fuzzy Zoeller – Zima with a jigger of peach schnapps (ACS)Millennial Malaise - A sweet honey dipping sauce (ADS)Jelani Cobb - Sounds like an Indian dish (Gina) (ACS)Air Doodle - The very worst Super Bowl snack on the planet (ACS)Faygala - Jewish sports drink (ACS)Stroke Cane - Sounds like some sugary treat, mixed with a reach around (ACS)The Silence Breakers (2) - good name for a mint (ACS)Lesbian Squirt - Sponsor of the Dinah Shore Classic (ACS)Preemptive gay strike - Worst video game ever (ADS)TV Shows/MoviesCunt du' Jour - A great Bond villain name (ACS)Coffee and Donuts - (Charlie Coffee III and Johnny Donetti) Johnny's a tough street wise cop whose jive talking and plays by his own rules and Charlie's super uptight (LL)Pedoph Isle (aka) Pedophile Island - All pedophiles are sent to live on an isolated island, and a 747 full of Boy Scouts crash lands there and they have to fight to survive (Also a place) (ACS)Anus and Eyeball - Buddy cop TV show duo (ACS)Pussy Pioneer - John Candy's last movie (ACS)Red Velvet - Made up movie character Clown played by Paul Giamatti. "Was secret service, and someone died on his watch. Now he's takin to clownin'." Wears a red velvet clown outfit. (ACS)Destination Of The Semen - (Adam Ray) A movie Harrison Ford passed on twice (ACS)Gay Eye - Movie where Adam plays Buddy McKlan, a racist homophobic mechanic who is blinded in a freak hot transmission fluid accident. He gets the donor eyes from a gay guy who perished on a moped accident in Antigua. Co-starring Larry the Cable Guy as his best friend. (Co-written by Bryan Cranston) (ACS)Grinders - Sitcom where Jon Gruden moves in with Johnny Manziel (ACS)Squishy Red River - Movie that started John Wayne (Show?)Gusset And Cable - Perfect Cop buddy duo team (AOTH)Just One Of The Gays - Stars Shia LaBeouf (ACS)Hard Impact - Sounds like a Van Damme movie from the 90's (ACS)Hammer Pants And Ice - Worst cop detective duo from the 80's (ACS)Living With The Kilowatts - Adam's new animated series where they just leave toaster ovens on all day (ACS)Keep Calm And Rape A Lot - Worst Monty Python film ever (ACS)Medical Mishaps - New show Dave Coulier and Tawny Kitaen could host (ACS)Roaming With Bison - Another great Bill Murray movie (ACS)Gainesville Florida Financial Planner - Sounds like a Saturday Night Live skit (ACS)Blame the Bee Gees - Adam's next documentary (ACS)Adam Knees Your Dad In The Nuts - Adam's new game show (ACS)Navigeddon - Terrorists take over all of the GPS systems of cars, and send them careening into the Grand Canyon (ACS)Rings Of Honor - Terrorists take over Olympic training facility in Colorado Springs, and the athletes have to use their individual skills to escape. (Cameo by Randy Couture as the salty old coach) (ACS)Endless Time/Ample Time For Backup - Adam's new Netflix series (ACS)Tarred n' Feathered - Buddy flick starring a retarded guy and an Indian chief (Show?)Mr. Will Doo And Can Doo - PSA Motivational cartoon bathroom characters Will Doo (Played by Will Arnette) and Can Doo is shaped like a toilet. Filmed in kitschy Clutch Cargo style animation (ADS)Robot Lawyer - Great Phil Hartman bit (ACS)Umpire News Network - Adam's channel with umpires reporting. Unbiased reporting (ACS)Sofa Tard - New CW show coming soon (Matt) (AOTH)Junior Fantasy Island - Show where kids of reckless parents are shipped off to live with Bill Cosby and Felicia Rashad (ADS)2 And A Half Denali's - Hasn't been same since Sheen left (ACS)So Kanye - Sitcom from the 90's (ACS)Ridicuopothy - Sounds like a Mike Judge movie (ADS)Master Buck - One of John Candy's most controversial movies (ACS)LA HOTT (1) - An 80’s bar with an outdoor door seating area (ACS)Mother Hitler - Coming to TNT. Starring Patrick Swayze's bother, Don (ACS)Sink and Bounce - Movie about roller boogie from the 80's, starred Lil' Bow Wow (ACS)The Debs - A made up CW network show where you just put all the hot chicks in Hollywood (ACS)The Origin Story Of AIDS - Worst Marvel movie ever (Bryan)(ACS)Everybody Hates Vinnie - Horrible sitcom (ACS)Chick Clan - Good movie title (ACS)Condo in Redondo - Best movie I ever did (ADS)Red Lobsteria - New show Dr. Drew was talking about where African Americans form their own country (ACS)Earthquake rehab - Reality show Dr. drew seismic expert and a civil engineer come together (Rainn Wilson) (ACS)Rooster Jones - Great John Wayne movie. Super Fly meets True Grit (ACS)Ernest Bigot goes to..... (ACS)Nickels On The Job - First and only Jewish gum shoe on the job. ABC, Friday nights, 10:00 p.m. (ADS)Solicitor General - Great Danny Kaye movie (RD)Disjointed - Lorena Bobbitt biopic (ADS)Habib and Company - Horrible children's show (MS)Bobby's Room - Howie Mandel animated project from the 90's (ACS)Page/Savage - Great cop duo show from the ‘80’s (Adam Ray) (ACS)Paper Asshole - Great Tatum O’Neal film (ACS)L.A. HOTT (2) - Failed Steven Bochco series pilot (ACS)Pieces Of String Too Small To Use - Lena Dunham film from the late 90’s (ACS)Oscar Squad - New Marvel Movie (Gina) (ACS)Cortron/Melamine - Transformers (Gina) (ACS)Anoscope - Worst way to see a movie (ADS)Practical Rapist - New SNL character (Gina) (ACS)Superfoot - Worst Marvel movie ever (Bryan) (ACS)Celebrity Food Chain - Would be a great show (Jeff Cesario) (ACS)Backsack and Anus - Worst cop duo ever (RS)Korean moyle - ABC’s next sitcom (Jeff) ACSNanny Huntin ‘with Ted Nugent - Great reality show I’d watch (ACS)Progressive pope - New sitcom (Gina) ACSNick Mancuso: Construction Fluffer - New TV Show (AONT)Rush Blitzer - Adam’s character from his movie, “Snapper” (BSR)Books/Coffee Table BooksDade County Black Prom, 1985 (ACS)Here Are The Pajamas We Picture You In (ACS)Three Shitty Homes, One Washing Machine, Zero Dryers - Title of Adam's new book (Ray) (AOTH)Chapstick And Batteries - Title of Adam's next bestselling book (ACS)Who The Fuck Put Their Sombrero on My Keys? – Title of Adam’s next book (ACS)Cunt With A Grunt - Adam's favorite Dr. Seuss book (PM)You'll Never See A Cockroach Jog (PM)Kemo Skinny Calves - Adam's new children's book (ADS)You're Dyslexic And I'm Dumb - Adam and John Popper's collaborative next book (ACS)I Get It If You’re GWAR - Adam's next book (ACS)Bulk Magazine - Costco magazine that Jimmy Kimmell graced the cover of twice (ACS)Do You Have To Take Your Top Off To Dye Your Pubes, Drew? (LL)Glamping With Moriah - Adam's new book (ACS)From The Mouths of Babes (Hot Chicks Not Babies) (ACS)(The) Sweet Spot - Adam's next book (Bryan) (ACS)I Thought Things Would Be Better When I Was Rich (ACS)Radio Station Kitchen (ACS)Post-it Notes In Radio Station Kitchens (ACS)Comedy Club Green Rooms And The Sofas That Were Not Made For Them (ACS)Jethro, the Mexican Jew - A great children's book (Gina) (ACS)Professor and the Construction Worker -The worst children's book ever (ACS)Willie and the Weed - Good name for a children's book (ACS)What Black People Think White People Complain About (ACS)Everyone Eventually Becomes The Man (ACS)Recipe for Misery (1) - Name Of Adam’s next book (ACS)In Defense Of Black Face - Adam’s next book (ACS)Hurry Up And Make Sense (2) - Biography title of the Talking Heads (ACS)Native American NamesChief Thunderbear (LL)Dances With Cocks (ACS)Dances With Lipstick (ACS)Ol' Urethra Windows (ACS)Oxnard - Indian name meaning the balls of a bull (ACS)V/P NamesAbsorbent Rag - Good name for T's V (ACS)Hurt Locker - Another name for T's V (ACS)Judge's Mansion - Another name for T's GCmarket.com - Another name for T's V (ACS)City of Industry - Another name for T's V (ACS)Dutch Mook - Another name for T's V (ACS)s VNo Safe Spaces - Great name for T's V (ACS)Hobo Stove - Another name for A's V (ACS)Sausage Grinder - Another name for A's V (ACS)Dixville Notch - Another name for G's V (ACS)Snake River Canyon - Another name for G's V (ACS)Dakota Access Pipeline - Another name for G's V (ACS)The Holidome - Another name for G’s V (ACS)Discovery Bay - Great name for G's V (ACS)B.O. Box - Great name for G's V (ACS)Sea bag - Good name for G's V (ACS)El Portal - Great name for G's V (ACS)Harry Belafonte - Adam's name for his junk, if he were a woman (Show?)Top Gear - Another name for Adam’s junk (ACS)El Gordo/King Taco - Good name for G’s V (ACS)Submitted June 02, 2018 at 02:21PM by Texas1971 https://www.reddit.com/AdamCarolla/comments/8o2hxt/carollaisms\\_june/?utm\\_source=iftttvia /AdamCarolla
Submitted June 02, 2018 at 02:48PM by peterboykin https://www.reddit.com/MagaFirstNews/comments/8o2oh9/carollaisms\_june/?utm\_source=ifttt
via /MagaFirstNews
submitted by peterboykin to MagaFirstNews [link] [comments]


2018.06.02 20:48 peterboykin Carollaisms J(une)

Carollaisms J(une)
Carollaisms (June)Band Names/Rap StarsMitt Romney and the One Percenters (ACS)ManAyz - Rap star (LL)D'Bagz - Rap star (LL)Maxi Pad - An all-girl band that knows how to rock (LL)Dick Tingle - One of the best blues men in the business (Show?)Lynette and the Lackeys (ACS)Straw Hat and the Bowties - Jerry Springer's dixieland band who plays at the Knott's Berry Farm Good Time Theater (ACS)Gut Fluffer (ACS)Johnny Beaumont and The Legionnaires - All wear matching powder blue tuxedoes (ACS)Automatic Vaginismus – Great band name (LL)Dissuade/D’ Suede - Rappeproducer of Kanye/one of Kim's ex beaus (ACS)Starchy Deuce - Band that should be produced by D' Suede (ACS)Narthex - (ACS)Epileptic Declawed Hamster - That is a helluva punk band right there (ACS)Loretta Lynch - Country singer who sang "Stand By Your Man" (ACS)The Areolas - Covered an Eagles song in the ‘90s (ACS)Fleece and Flannel - One of the best lesbian acoustic duos you will ever see (ACS)3 Chainz - Rap star (ACS)Blues Squatter - Adam's dad’s band name (ACS)Tampon Kayak - One of Seattle's greatest, but least heard of indie bands (ACS)Jizz Grenade (LL)Dryer Fire - Hot indie band name (ACS)Iranian Revolutionary Guard - Prince's backup band (ACS)Rape Kit - Name of Adam's band from high school (ACS)Nog Bong - A band Adam was in in high school (ACS)Bum Blazer – Adam’s band in high school (ACS)White Trash Kimchi - Another good band name (Bald Bryan) (ACS)White Noise - Adam's rap name (ADS)Promethazine - Lil Wayne's sister (ADS)Light Rail - Great Rap name (ADS)Danny In The Joint - Good indie band name (ACS)Anal Cleft - One of the worst reggae singers to leave Jamaica (ACS)Anal Cleft and the Taints - Great reggae group (ACS)MEL-ROL - One of The Spice Girls (AOTH)D'bris - Great Rap name (ACS)Cisgender - A militant female rapper....for the ladies (ACS)Krav Maga (1) - Country singing Jew (ACS)Lynette and Paulette - Sounds like a singing duo from the 60's (RD)Nuts In The Sink - Name of Ray’s new band (Ray) (AOTH)SubDude - Pete Holmes' rap name (ACS)Ray And The Enemas - Blues singer and his backup band (ADS)Yakov Crutchfield - He has a show in Branson (ADS)Mac 18 - Adam’s favorite rapper (RD)Tremble Lean – Adam’s rap name (ACBSL)Sticker Back – Worst band out of Canada ever (ACS)Pennywise and Pound Foolish - A band from the ‘90's (RD)Strawberry Shortcake's Neti Pot - Great band name (Twitter)Puffy Elon Musk - Worst rapper ever (ACS)Pantera Club at Laguna Seca (Twitter)Savage Body Attack - New wave romantic band Ace was in when he was 19 (FBL)Jumping Jazzy Jews - Jeff Goldblum's jazz band (ACS)Snore Cherry - Great band name (ACS)Pat Benatard - Pat Benatar cover band (ACS)Rancid Nuts - Good band name (ACS)Gary And The Knotholes - Good band name (AOTH)Tampon Canoe - Good indie band (ACS)One Erection - A good boy band (ACS)Flushin' Dew - A good country duo (ACS)Armo Jeweler - Great band name (RD)Radon - (Lynette thinks) there a Whitesnake cover-band (ACS)The Taste Of Ace - Great band name (ACS)King Grape and the Raisinettes (GS)Concord Grape and the Raisinettes (GS)Gary Taco - Love that band (ACS)The Silence Breakers (2) - Good punk band (Gina) (ACS)Daddy’s Got A Dually – Good country song (ACS)Dip Curtain - Good indie band (ACS)Crystal Lobbyists - Sounds like a great techno band (ACS)Narcissistic Monk -Great indie band (GS)Sporty Prius - Worst of the Spice Girls (ACS)Laden and Bravado - 70s duo who opened for Seals n Crofts (ACS)The Bouncers - great band name (ACS)Hurry up and make sense (1) - a good talking heads album (ACS)Appropriate Sombrero - Maxapada’s next band name (Bryan) (ACS)Flirtatious Contrail - great rap name (GS)Jack Johnson - Guy from The White Stripes aka The Black Stripes (ACS)Song TitlesMeatless Mondays - Horrible Bangles song (Show?)Measles and Commuter Trains - Worst Christmas song ever (ACS)White Guys Be Ownin' Everything - Adam's next hit (ACS)Blood On The Grout - John Cougar Mellencamp song (ACS)No Blood In The Peckeroo - Good John Cougar song (ACS)Mellen's Gold - A three disc box set of nothing but John Cougar Mellencamp hits (ACS)Freaks, Retards and Jews - Not a Cher song (ACS)Pedophile Cops - Good Cheap Trick song (ACS)Pig Anus Soup - Favorite Rolling Stones album (Bryan) (ACS)That Dog Don’t Mess With Olga and Natalia Don’t Spit No Mo’ - Sounds like a Mississippi Delta blues song (Bryan) (ACS)Goggles Are For Pussies - Trace Adkins' number one hit (ACAFBSL)Whistle While You Masturbate - The lost Disney song aka "Whistle While You Jerk" (ACS)12 Pack & Dick's Hard - Name of Adam's new album (Gina) (ACS)Blood and Soil - A good Smithereens song (ACS)Pina Colada in Amsterdam - Worst Jimmy Buffet song ever (ACS)Tough Times In The City - Great Nick Gilder song (ACS)I've Got A Hamster In My Scrotum And He's Looking For His Keys - That's a good country song (ACS)Gay Hitler -Great Elvis Costello song (ACS)Tard On The Tool Shed - Good Mellenamp song (AOTH)Condo in Redondo - Sublime song (ADS)Animoji - Band that sung "Obsession" (ACS)People Who Have Lost People - Worst Barbara Streisand song ever (ACS)Tilted Heart - Great Tammy Wynette song (ADS)Yoga wood - Great Beatles song (ACS)Anal cleft - Song from the Sound of Music (ACS)Morgue Mode - Sounds like a guy from Iceland who is a DJ (ACS)I’ve got a Saturday and two friends - great country song (Gina) (ACS)Recipe for Misery (2) - Title of the next Guns N Roses album (ACS)Circling Back To Baldwin - Good name for a country song (ACS)Keistered in Winnipeg - (Bald’s) favorite Willie Nelson song (ACS)Football Players/Athletes/Teams:Legs Akimbo - Wide Receiver (ACS)Feral Katz - Nose Tackle (ACS)L' Brarian Booker - Wide Receiver (ACS)Oscar Buzz - Linebacker (ACS)DeVigorous Lover - Wide Receiver (ACS)Nadir Zenith - Placekicker (ACS)DeGluten Free - Offensive Lineman (ACS)Tangy Mango - Fullback (ACS)N'Farious Plan - (position?) (ACS)Modular Holmes - (position?) (ACS)Fortuitous Bounce - Safety (ACS)Operatin' Thetan - (ACS) Quarterback for the Washington Redskins (ACS)Minority Banks - HOF OLB who died tragically in a car wreck shortly after his HOF induction, a natural athlete, he played option QB in college along with being a stand out member of the track team, and in high school he was captain of the basketball team. Survived by his twin brother Majority Banks, who also played in the league, and daughter Recuser Banks who many believe was the best athlete in the family (ACS)Coach Platitude - "Take a knee son...helmet's not a chair" (ACS)Glendora Bevmo - Mother of DeVigorous Lover and L' Brarian Booker (different fathers, of course) (ACS)Marshall Law - (Allison) (ACS)Orlando Ceeworld - (position?) (ACS)Du Vatine - (position?) (Show?)Raja Slate - Super fast wide-out out of Marshall via LSU (AOTH)Moe Greene - Great corner for the Washington Redskins in the 80’s (ACS)Bronx Defenders - Sounds like a AAA hockey team (RD)Medical Error - Slipped in the draft due to a video being released just prior (ACS)Homeo Stasis (position?) (ACS)Capybara - The greatest name for a major league skipper (ACS)Ejaxico Johnson (position?) (ACS)Radiant Barrier vs. Attic Fan - The worst WWE matchup ever to grace the stage (AOTH)Bamboo Brick - one of the greatest mixed martial artists on the planet (AOTH)Dexter Methorphan - He did not participate in the combines, but his coaches say he can run a 4.3 (Twitter)Bob Jacuzzi - Great point guard for the Celtics aka "THE COOZE" (ACS)Shame Negation - Picked to leave Clemson early and go very early in the draft this year. (ADS)Entertainment Crackers - Another name for the Washington Generals ACSHardibacker - Good name for an inside backer (ACS)Osmosis - Black dude. Forward for the Knicks who might or might not have been traded (ADS)Onus Wilson - NFL draftee (ACS)World Be Mine - Adam’s new basketball name (ACS)Porn Star Names/Terms/Gay Code:Spoodini - (LL)Rocky Stucco - (AOTH)No Can Doo - Backdoor anal queen of China (ACS)Kristallnacht - Worst porn star name in the business (ACS)Madison Avenue (I am Rappaport Podcast)Hero Du Jour (I am Rappaport Podcast)Kindle Fire (ACS)Jackson Hole - Gay porn actor (ACS)Col. Duke Lacrosse - Adam's porn name (LL)Duke Circumference - Adam's gay porn name (ACS)Rich Data - Gay porn actor (Show?)Tom Foolery - Gay porn actor (Show?)Honey Dijon - Great porn star name (Show?)Aids Machete - One of Adam's gay porn names. "Very short stint, I only did 2 weeks with that name, so it was like 41 movies." (ACS)Bryce Canyon - Great gay porn name (ACS)The Italian Coastguard - A gay move. "Let me just start with basic anal, then I'll slide into the Italian Coast Guard." (ACS)Tetanus Gym - Good gay porn name "Who you working with?" "Tetanus Gym." "Oh boy, make sure you're on top" (ACS)Shared A Back Fence - gay slang (ACS)Mea Culpa - Adam's porn name (ACS)Hand Twins - Gay code (ACS)Backscatter - Porn technology (PM)Cajun Tree Climber - Gay code (AOTH)Snow Blower- Gay code (AOTH)Stump Grinder - Gay code (AOTH)Tumbler And Coaster - Adam's gay slang replacement for "top and bottom" (PM)Go For A Bike Ride - Gay code (ACS)Artie Fartie - Adam's porn name from the 80's (ACS)Road Island Ray - Ray's porn name (AOTH)38KKK -A type of porn that comes out of Kentucky (ACS)Tech Screw - A dirty website for geeks (ACS)Bearvalanche - Worst gay move ever (ACS)Wacked Off Pieces Of Cactus - Gay code for gay rough trade (ACS)Brad Nail - Good gay porn name (ADS)Lightning Rod - Good gay porn name for Milo Yiannopplous (ADS)Milk Barn - Another name for Adam's bathroom sink (ACS)Meat Thievery - That's just good gay code (ACS)Hairy Shin - Adam's gay porn name (ACS)Asian Persuasion - Sounds like a good name for a porn series Asian persuasion 16 (ACS)Cock Holster - Good movie series, cock holster 14 (ACS)Celebrity Du Jour - Great porn name (ACS)Europol - Another great porn name (ACS)Roy Wood - Adam's gay porn name (ACS)Tank slapper - Gay slang (Gina) (ACS)Porch Pirate - Gay term (ACS)Mad Chuck - The world's worst name for a gay porn star (AOTH)Sweat lodge - Gay code (ACS)The L.A. Underground - Sounds like a gay bar (M&J)Skin and grin - Gay slang (ACS)Rear Admiral - The name of one of the best bars on west side (ACS)Loaded for bear - Now a gay term (GS)Fruit Of The Year - A porn Dave (Dameshek) starred in (ACS)The Lebanese Comedian - Ace's favorite sex position (ACS)Cockout - When a gay guy doesn't try very hard (ACS)Margana Wood - Porn name (ACS)Hugh Bris - Porn star (RD)Matte Clear - Fondalier’s gay porn name (AOTH)Palatial Estates – A good 80’s fake tittie porn name (AOTH)Cokie Roberts - Great porn name (ACS)Armenian Christmas - An unspeakable sexual act in prison. "Johnny ratted out the white supremacists to the warden, so they gave him an Armenian Christmas" (Show?)Ride The Pine - Gay slang (ADS)Meet Gaze - Gay slang (ACS)Asshole Rider - Gay slang (ACS)Cash Widedick - Ace's porn name if you can call an apple a honey crisp. (ACS)Shanda Lear - Great stripper name (Gina) (ACS)Fiery Cherry - Good porn name (ACS)Jerk the wheel - Code for masturbation (ACS)Giddyup Titties - Gina’s porn name (Gina) (ACS)French astronaut - Great gay slang (ACS)Mr Bandera - gay code (ACS)Beefmato/Clamato - sounds like names of venerial diseases (ACS)Spanner - Australian gay code (ACS)Rocky tenure - Adam’s gay porn name (ACS)The End Game - One of Stormy Daniels movie titles (RD)Room for cream - Great porno title (Gina) (ACS)Pedialyte shower - Worst sexual act ever (Sklar) (ACS)Foot Zunki - Add-on to the Pedialyte shower (ACS)Self rimming sink - gay slang (AOTH)Harvey Mudd - gay bar drink where vermouth and bartender shit is mixed in a goblet (ACS)Barney’s Beanery - ultimate name for a gay bar (ACS)Parallel park both ways - euphemism for being bi (GS)The Big Three - Gerago’s junk (RD)73 - When a fat guy tries to 69 with a chubby prostitute he met at a ham radio convention(ACS)Backlog - Stormy Daniels movie title (Bryan)(ACS)Miscellaneous PeopleTrajectory Hagar - High school kid "heading down the wrong path" in life (ACS)Slick Mouth - Adam's prison name (ACS)Rich Carless - Cool homeless guy name (ACS)Keyless Chuck - Best homeless guy name (ACS)Nasal Ranger - Worst superhero name ever (Gina) (ACS)Krav Maga (2) - Good name for a sheriff (ADS)Hubcap Annie - Horror that hangs out with Keyless Chuck (ACS)Becky Honkington (Allison) (ACS)Monica Chugscock - (Pronounced "Shuggscawk") (ADS)Tyvek DuPont - Best rich guy’s name (AOTH)Mattress - A Model/actress (ACS)Hofmeister Kink - Nazi war criminal who's been in hiding in Brazil for the past 61 years. aka Jake Johnson (ACS)Serpiginous - The world's wimpiest swordsman. Sir Piginous of Wussville (LL)Chick Fil a - Great play-by-play guy for the Warriors from the 70’s (Show?)Peri Menopausal - Best P.I. working the Chicago beat (LL)Whiskey Dick - The neighborhood pedophile in the clown outfit (ACS)Surge - Guy that drives for ÜBER (ACS)Babbling Brook - Great name for a female cattle auctioneer (PM)Terra Firma - Name of the "woman of color" that heckled Adam at a Ventura live show and was removed by force (The Ranker Podcast)Octomom - Great Batman villain (Bryan) (ACS)Larry The Cabinet Guy - Failed Israeli comic…"Don't get 'er done!" (ACS)Rod Blagojevich - Joe Francis' slimy brother who sells above ground pools out of a primered van (ACS)Cockchug Man - The gay superhero in The Village People that wears just all leather (ACS)MEL-ROL- She's one of The Spice Girls (AOTH)Hand Farts - A new comedian Adam had never heard of (ACS)Juan Jeremy - The greatest international film star ever (ACS)Bitchathane Jackson - Good name for a "sista" (ACS)Tobar - Perfect caveman name (ACS)Vroman - A fast moving Roman (ACS)Korn Syrup and Fructose - Women of color who work at the strip club with Jade (stage 4) (ACS)Fred Meyer - Lucy's neighbor (ACS)Kimchi - The Asian flutist (ACS)Pacoima - The mechanic from Taxi (ACS)Dick Salt - NATO Alliance General (ACS)Dick Salt (2) - Manger of the Mariners in the early 70’s (Bryan) (ACS)Caramel And Fudge - Two more African-American prostitutes that lived in the apartment above Adam’s (ACS)Peaches - The whore that lived upstairs (ACS)F. Me Bailey - Greatest lawyer of all time (RD)Agua Caliente - Loves that guy. He does a great John Madden (ACS)Senior Penis - One the most dangerous drug lords to ever work (ADS)Shill Du'Jour - Good Bond secretary name (RD)Brexit Romero - Sounds like an International assassin (ACS)Lugansk - That gay diver who hit his head and gave the whole Canadian team AIDS (ACS)Leak O'rama - A Dutch action star, starred in “Sudden Death” (AOTH)Vaginismus - Great black guy name (ADS)Normcore - Guy that owns Westwood one (ACS)LaTolstoy - Great black guy name (ACS)Shapiro – Artist who is really good at anime. Died in the 60’s but was a real trendsetter (ACS)Chuck Spears – Good name for a racist. “Hey you workin’ with Chuck Spears over at the Klan?” (ACS)Norethindrone - DAG’s Sister (CLL)La Tuskegee - Black airline pilot (ACS)C-clamps – Nickname for Adam’s step-mom. “Ol’ C-clamps locked me out of the house again.” (ACS)Harry Nilsson - (Gary thinks) he does the voices on The Simpsons (ADS)Nutella - Great name for a crazy black woman (ACS)Sia - The perfect person to break up with. Would be perfect if she was dating Jack (hit the road Jack) (ACS)The Ball Catcher - What Adam used to call Ray's ass in junior high (ACFBSL)MOAB - Matt's new nickname (Mother of All Buttholes) (AONTH)Trip Reeb - Great name for a white guy (ACS)Merle Horn - One of the greatest best ropers to ever come down the Pecos (ACS)The Boring Machine - Lynette's name for Adam (ACS)Avocado Hand - The nickname of Eric Clapton's brother (Chet) who works at a Mexican place and is charge of the guacamole (ACS)Bagel Hand - Clapton's Jewish cousin (ACS)Fa-Sheeya (fascia) - A heavy set woman of color that works at the DMV (ACAFBSL)Ghrelin - New AM/PM mascot (ACS)Krav Maga (3) - An Israeli Captain from 1946 (ACS)Cuban Boa - Sounds like a dark skinned trannie (ACS)Gabardine - She's a very chatty woman of color middle-aged and she'll talk your ear off. (ACS)Guy Dudebro - Greatest name ever (AOTH)Otto Warmbier- Simultaneously the greatest and worst beer master brewer name ever (ACS)Leif Geragos - Greatest rocking attorney ever Viking rocker attorney (ACS)Ernest J. Bigot - "I'm just asking....I'm just wanna know...." (ACS)Panzanella - Cobra's full name (ACS)Sheet Metal Nibbler - Great name for Matt the porcelain punisher (AOTH)Big Grenadine - Sounds like a large black neighbor (ACS)Silent gym - Next to Keyless Chuck, best homeless guy name ever (ACS)Nuchilla - Sounds like a black vampire (Theo Von) (ACS)D' poleon - Black Napoleon (ACS)Luke Rockhold - Sounds like a character on The Flintstones (GS)Sissy squat - She was hot (AOTH)Beulah - The town horror (RD)Ronan Farrow - One of the best wheel men in Europe (ACS)Duke Bagg - Comedian Ian Bagg's brother (ACS)Root ball grinder - A horrible term for a bitchy wife (Ruth Ballgrinder and Harriet Mulcher) (Tim Allen) (ACS)Paul Funyun - Just a big dude who likes to have fun. Has a pink ox as a sidekick (ACS)Page/Savage - A great lawyer team (Adam Ray) (ACS)Ivar the Boneless - Ace’s dad’s nickname in high school. aka Jim the spineless (ACS)Bash Worthy - Comic strip's character name/title (ACS)Uncle Tom-bién - Mexican Uncle Tom (ACS)Alist Poon - An Indian exchange student who has cerebral palsy (ACS)Indignant Asswipes - Good name for an improv troupe (Gina) (ACS)Flora in Fauna - two black chicks that work for him (ADS)Cheap - Name of a he/she that literally went under sexual assignment surgery last month (ACS)Heroin (1)(Pronounced Ehr-o-win by JCVD) A character in Lord Of The Rings (Bryan) (ACS)Yersinia pestis - Ace did Celebrity Apprentice with that dude. He won that year (ADS)Morgue Mode - Sounds like a guy from Iceland who is a DJ (ACS)Rachel Bias - Great stripper name (ACS)Buzz Ramjet - Aviation attorney (ACS)Black Cherry - Stripper name Bryan (ACS)Saffron - Sassy black woman in Meg Whitman movie (ACS)Vibranium - a new black kid name from Black Panther (ACS)Bird Nerd - Marvel superhero (ACS)Morning Zoos/DJ's/Radio StationsGum and Condoms - (Show?)Dusty Labia - Adam's handle when he used to do AM Mornings. (ACS)Asscrack and Backsack in the morning with Sludge (LL)Crockpots and Headphones (ACS)Booger and Floor Wax (ACS)Almonds and Water (ACS)Cold Butter And Calves (ADS)Schluter And The Drain - Schluter has a thick Austrian accent , while "The Drain" has a super low voice (AOTH)Ace Rockolla - Just Google "Ace Rockolla Lightning round...." (LL)Fungus and Mold (Show?)Stupid and Petty (Show?)Eunice and Edgar - Bubba the Love Sponge's parents (ACS)Flip Flops and Fanny Packs (ACS)Hairy Shin - Does a KCRE show in the weekends (ACS)Deep Bra Grooves - Should be a Sirius XM station Channel 248, C+ and above! (ACS)Andy and Opie - Great Radio Show (ACS)QuietRock - Sounds like an easy listening rock station (AOTH)Quiet Crush - A good easy listening radio station (ACS)The Tool Box - SiriusXM took tune station aka KTOL (ACS)Ray's Enema Antics - New podcast on Carolla Digital (Bryan)(ACS)Doug Gets Blown While He Eats Pudding - Doug Benson's next podcast (ACS)Cat Packer - Used to do mornings with her brother, Fudge (ACS)Duke and Shinola - good morning show team (ACS)PlacesBoobville - (LL)Pedoph Isle aka Pedophile Island - Island where are all the pedophiles are sent to live. (Also a TV show/movie idea) (LL)Lil' Lord Fauntleroy’s Academy for Albino Hemophiliacs - Drew's childhood school (LL)Doesntexistizcan - Where presidential candidate Platitude's grandfather was from (ACS)Boga Raton - The world's worst resort spot (Show?)Meat Yard - Great name for a gay bar (ACS)Mister Fister's - Adam's all-time top name for a gay bar (ACS)Sub-Par - Worst name for a submarine sandwich shop (Show?)Queen Mary - Great name for a tranny bar (ACS)NuvaRing - A German racetrack. "The new Nissan GTR turned it in 7:21, faster than the Corvette." (Show?)Louis Pasteur Middle School (ACS)Helm’s Deep - World's first gay bar bakery (ACS)Kal Penn - One of the best sounding names to get an engineering degree from (ACS)Alaska State Motto - Love fishing but I hate your kids? Alaska! (PM)Duke University - John Wayne's college (ACS)Planned Possumhood - Planned Parenthood in Arkansas (ACS)Fruit Stand - Great name for a gay bar (ACS)Poo Poo City - Where Charles Fletcher Loomis' house is located (ACS)Blood Bank - Great name for a check cashing place in the hood (ACS)Bass Manor - Great name for a gay bar (ACS)The Dead C - Sounds like the worst name for a lesbian bar ever (ACS)Wood Bar - Good name for a gay bar (ACS)Ghost Load - Ride at Calico Ghost Town (ADS)Nasacort - Country club for Jewish folks where they play tennis at (ADS)L.A. HOTT (1) - An 80's bar with an outdoor door seating area (ACS)Fairy Wings - Good name for a bar on the west side (ACS)Second Hand/First World - Store that sells rich whitey’s high end stuff (ACS)The Lance Hunter - Perfect name for a gay bar (Dumb People Town)Pervert Park - Theo Vaughn grew up there (ACS)Big Sur - Great name for a big and tall shop (Show?)Studio Centric - Sounds like a Utopia. Between Valley Village and Sherman Oaks (AOTH)Asstard - Thor came from that planet (ACS)Grand Entrance - Great name for a gay bar (AOTH)Thermopolis - Where the Bun Boy is (ACS)The Turkish Embassy - Gay bar (ACS)Low Tide - Gay code for boner in the rear view mirror (ACS)Corumption - On the way to Vegas, where Heidi Fleiss lives with her macaws (ACS)C.C. Fichens - Sounds like a pretzel stand (Gina) (ACS)Timpani Barn - where to get timpani to go, has three big Mexicans in the kitchen (ACS)Heroin (2)(Pronounced Ehr-o-win by JCVD) The health food store in Venice (ACS)Pocket Passers - Next to Mister Fister’s (Gina) (ACS)MiscellaneousCleaning The Pink Turtle - Bryan's name for pleasuring oneself (ACS)Analingus - A new type of breath mint (LL)The Milk Of Arthritic Goats - A rabbi's curse: "May you suckle at the teet of the milk of arthritic goat!!!" (ACS)Carbon Dating - A black dating website (ACS)RU486 - Vanity plate for a guy who runs an abortion clinic (ADS)Jet Green - Amsterdam's Airlines (ACS)Stromer, Oldhafer and Carolla - World's worst law firm (AOTH)Ira Carolla - Sounds like an affliction "Oh my Ira Carolla's acting up" (ACS)Sawjay - Sounds French...gay word for sausage. "I was strokin' this dude’s sawjay" (ACS)Smokeless Cigarette - Name for Dr. Drew's honker after his prostate surgery (ADS)El Niño - Name of "Sinn" strip club DJ's cock (ACS)Blue Man - Crazy hairdresser's macaw who doesn't judge (PM)Lucia - An Italian moped (ACS)American Jewish World Service - A van that's begging to be shot at (ACS)E-aye? - Canadian version of EBay (ACS)Sweatpants Lesbian - What Adam would be. An in-between lesbian. Not a lipstick lesbian, not a butch dyke (ACS)SuckStrong - Bill Clinton's bracelet (ACS)Gaybus - Gay and bogus (ACS)Flappy Bird - The most offensive name for the vagina (ACS)G8 (Summit) - The Pontiac that Oprah gave away on her show (ACS)Oracle A The Delphi - Big new startup company (ADS)Crewkakke - A type of sweater (ACS)The Flying Dutchman - Great name for an Amsterdam airlines (ACS)Cleaning My Chain - Euphemism for beating off (ACS)Awesome Town - A gathering of three or more polar bears (ACS)Avocado - The Greek word for nut sack (ACS)Doucherette - A gum/patch that douchebags chew/use (ACS)Urban Milling -Black guys standing around (AOTH)Synesthesia - When you eat your own hair (ACS)Tuck Rule - When a guy pretends he's a chick and stands in front of the mirror (ACS)My #2 Pencil Is Out Of Lead - Another term for erectile dysfunction (ACS)Float A Bond - When a politician farts (RD)Vaginismus - black people's holiday, accompanied with a lot of ceremonial garb (ADS)Vaseline and Gauze - Elizabeth Taylor's new scent (ACS)Jewber - A drunk on a 10-speed (ACS)Chickpea - What Gina does when we camp (ACS)Oscar Squad (2) - Bad gay code (ACS)Airbus - Worst name for an aircraft. Sounds like “air donkey” (AOTH)Shailene Woodley - Sounds like the most fantastical verb/adverb combo. “I want to Shailene Woodley through a field of poppies with you” (Gina) (Twitter)Asshole Rider (2) - Worst piece of exercise equipment Vinnie’s ever endorsed (ACS)Diario La Prensa - Stealer of the jersey in Spanish (ACS)The Sicilian Fly Swatter - Sounds like a WWF move (Gina) (ACS)Jellyfish - Sounds like something your grandpa would buy for you at the mall (ACS)Fruit Fly - More politically correct term for fag hag (Show?)Jewgling - When a Jew "Googles" their symptoms (ACS)Tavares - David Wild's boner medicine (ACS)Jew -Over - A mulligan from a barmitzva. "Uh, I misread that...can I get a Jew-over?" (ACS)Ossified - That's a Don King word, there (ACS)Zero for Cecil - Worst charity ever (Bald Bryan) (ACS)A++ - A bra that Gina will never see (ACS)Joycelyn - A good name for Curly from the Three Stooges to say (ACS)Phallisee - Latin for "to see the penis" (ADS)Coffee Nap - Euphemism for pooping in your pants (ACS)USS Monitor - Doesn't sound like a ship of war, sounds like a night nurse (ACS)Dotard - A skirt a man wears (ACS)Wilding- Something derogatory that takes place in public pools in certain counties (ACS)Caveat - Latin for shitting on Adam's point (ADS)Festiva - Sounds like a boner medicine (ACS)Depeche Mode - French for “who dealt it?” (ADS)Beefy Clutch – The purse Gina thought Lady Gaga took to the Emmy’s (ACS)Sig Sauer - Something you would yell at Oktoberfest before downing a stiff stein of stout (ACS)Jeans day – Sounds like the special day for your special need son Gene, to raise money (ACS)Wilding - What takes place in public pools in certain counties (GS)4F - Can’t/won’t be eligible for the draft (ACS)Groupie - a kind of fish (ACS)The African chick - Horrible name for a boat (ACS)Inclusion rider - Snowboard for retarded kids (ACS)The Urethra - Bad name for a car (ACS)Mercury retrograde - when you take your index finger and shove it under your sack before you blow, and you belch it up later (ACS)UEFA - Transsexuals playing soccer with a balled up maxi pad (GS)Missed Connections- The worst airline ever (ACS)Carollo - Sounds like a Tool you’d use rarely (ACS)Brembo - that Mexican food company that makes that bread (Matt) (ACS)Futon - Chinese for bear trap (ACS)Food/DrinksDeer Bits - A venison cereal. Made of frosted deer flakes (Show?)Coco Chanel - Nestlé’s newest coffee flavor (ACS)Honey Dicks - Best cereal name ever (ACS)Dawson's Beard - A pudding flavor Ace saw at Whole Foods (ACS)Mighty Mutts - Worst breakfast cereal ever (ADS)Chillax - A cinnamon based drink from "Hector's" country (ACS)Black Dick - An English desert (ACS)Tardy Digression - Sounds like a finger food..."would you like another tardy digression?" "No, I'm saving room for the main meal" (IFYWABC)Double Bird Strike - Mixed drink created by Ace and Teresa. Made with Grey Goose, Wild Turkey, a splash of Canadian Club, and a splash of Hudson River water (ACS)GAYtorade - A sports drink for gay people, because they lose essential body fluids (ACS)University of Illinois At Urbana Champaign - Sounds like a carbonated drink for black people (ACS)Flinch Fuck - Part of a nutritious breakfast, and a healthy relationship (ADS)Phantom Punch - Something Bill Cosby gave his lady friends (ACS)Pansy Sauce - Goes good with some shrimp (ADS)Tilted Pillar - Kick ass IPA (AOTH)Shaver - A good name for a miniature pastrami sandwich (Cousin Sal Show)GPA - Something they add to children's cereal (ACS)Stellwell's - A new low fat snack cracker (ACS)Conchata Ferrell - A great cheese/unwanted cat (ACS)Poopwell's - One of the worst snacks Nabisco has ever put their name on (ACS)Belldini – Latest Taco Bell offering (ACS)Fuzzy Zoeller – Zima with a jigger of peach schnapps (ACS)Millennial Malaise - A sweet honey dipping sauce (ADS)Jelani Cobb - Sounds like an Indian dish (Gina) (ACS)Air Doodle - The very worst Super Bowl snack on the planet (ACS)Faygala - Jewish sports drink (ACS)Stroke Cane - Sounds like some sugary treat, mixed with a reach around (ACS)The Silence Breakers (2) - good name for a mint (ACS)Lesbian Squirt - Sponsor of the Dinah Shore Classic (ACS)Preemptive gay strike - Worst video game ever (ADS)TV Shows/MoviesCunt du' Jour - A great Bond villain name (ACS)Coffee and Donuts - (Charlie Coffee III and Johnny Donetti) Johnny's a tough street wise cop whose jive talking and plays by his own rules and Charlie's super uptight (LL)Pedoph Isle (aka) Pedophile Island - All pedophiles are sent to live on an isolated island, and a 747 full of Boy Scouts crash lands there and they have to fight to survive (Also a place) (ACS)Anus and Eyeball - Buddy cop TV show duo (ACS)Pussy Pioneer - John Candy's last movie (ACS)Red Velvet - Made up movie character Clown played by Paul Giamatti. "Was secret service, and someone died on his watch. Now he's takin to clownin'." Wears a red velvet clown outfit. (ACS)Destination Of The Semen - (Adam Ray) A movie Harrison Ford passed on twice (ACS)Gay Eye - Movie where Adam plays Buddy McKlan, a racist homophobic mechanic who is blinded in a freak hot transmission fluid accident. He gets the donor eyes from a gay guy who perished on a moped accident in Antigua. Co-starring Larry the Cable Guy as his best friend. (Co-written by Bryan Cranston) (ACS)Grinders - Sitcom where Jon Gruden moves in with Johnny Manziel (ACS)Squishy Red River - Movie that started John Wayne (Show?)Gusset And Cable - Perfect Cop buddy duo team (AOTH)Just One Of The Gays - Stars Shia LaBeouf (ACS)Hard Impact - Sounds like a Van Damme movie from the 90's (ACS)Hammer Pants And Ice - Worst cop detective duo from the 80's (ACS)Living With The Kilowatts - Adam's new animated series where they just leave toaster ovens on all day (ACS)Keep Calm And Rape A Lot - Worst Monty Python film ever (ACS)Medical Mishaps - New show Dave Coulier and Tawny Kitaen could host (ACS)Roaming With Bison - Another great Bill Murray movie (ACS)Gainesville Florida Financial Planner - Sounds like a Saturday Night Live skit (ACS)Blame the Bee Gees - Adam's next documentary (ACS)Adam Knees Your Dad In The Nuts - Adam's new game show (ACS)Navigeddon - Terrorists take over all of the GPS systems of cars, and send them careening into the Grand Canyon (ACS)Rings Of Honor - Terrorists take over Olympic training facility in Colorado Springs, and the athletes have to use their individual skills to escape. (Cameo by Randy Couture as the salty old coach) (ACS)Endless Time/Ample Time For Backup - Adam's new Netflix series (ACS)Tarred n' Feathered - Buddy flick starring a retarded guy and an Indian chief (Show?)Mr. Will Doo And Can Doo - PSA Motivational cartoon bathroom characters Will Doo (Played by Will Arnette) and Can Doo is shaped like a toilet. Filmed in kitschy Clutch Cargo style animation (ADS)Robot Lawyer - Great Phil Hartman bit (ACS)Umpire News Network - Adam's channel with umpires reporting. Unbiased reporting (ACS)Sofa Tard - New CW show coming soon (Matt) (AOTH)Junior Fantasy Island - Show where kids of reckless parents are shipped off to live with Bill Cosby and Felicia Rashad (ADS)2 And A Half Denali's - Hasn't been same since Sheen left (ACS)So Kanye - Sitcom from the 90's (ACS)Ridicuopothy - Sounds like a Mike Judge movie (ADS)Master Buck - One of John Candy's most controversial movies (ACS)LA HOTT (1) - An 80’s bar with an outdoor door seating area (ACS)Mother Hitler - Coming to TNT. Starring Patrick Swayze's bother, Don (ACS)Sink and Bounce - Movie about roller boogie from the 80's, starred Lil' Bow Wow (ACS)The Debs - A made up CW network show where you just put all the hot chicks in Hollywood (ACS)The Origin Story Of AIDS - Worst Marvel movie ever (Bryan)(ACS)Everybody Hates Vinnie - Horrible sitcom (ACS)Chick Clan - Good movie title (ACS)Condo in Redondo - Best movie I ever did (ADS)Red Lobsteria - New show Dr. Drew was talking about where African Americans form their own country (ACS)Earthquake rehab - Reality show Dr. drew seismic expert and a civil engineer come together (Rainn Wilson) (ACS)Rooster Jones - Great John Wayne movie. Super Fly meets True Grit (ACS)Ernest Bigot goes to..... (ACS)Nickels On The Job - First and only Jewish gum shoe on the job. ABC, Friday nights, 10:00 p.m. (ADS)Solicitor General - Great Danny Kaye movie (RD)Disjointed - Lorena Bobbitt biopic (ADS)Habib and Company - Horrible children's show (MS)Bobby's Room - Howie Mandel animated project from the 90's (ACS)Page/Savage - Great cop duo show from the ‘80’s (Adam Ray) (ACS)Paper Asshole - Great Tatum O’Neal film (ACS)L.A. HOTT (2) - Failed Steven Bochco series pilot (ACS)Pieces Of String Too Small To Use - Lena Dunham film from the late 90’s (ACS)Oscar Squad - New Marvel Movie (Gina) (ACS)Cortron/Melamine - Transformers (Gina) (ACS)Anoscope - Worst way to see a movie (ADS)Practical Rapist - New SNL character (Gina) (ACS)Superfoot - Worst Marvel movie ever (Bryan) (ACS)Celebrity Food Chain - Would be a great show (Jeff Cesario) (ACS)Backsack and Anus - Worst cop duo ever (RS)Korean moyle - ABC’s next sitcom (Jeff) ACSNanny Huntin ‘with Ted Nugent - Great reality show I’d watch (ACS)Progressive pope - New sitcom (Gina) ACSNick Mancuso: Construction Fluffer - New TV Show (AONT)Rush Blitzer - Adam’s character from his movie, “Snapper” (BSR)Books/Coffee Table BooksDade County Black Prom, 1985 (ACS)Here Are The Pajamas We Picture You In (ACS)Three Shitty Homes, One Washing Machine, Zero Dryers - Title of Adam's new book (Ray) (AOTH)Chapstick And Batteries - Title of Adam's next bestselling book (ACS)Who The Fuck Put Their Sombrero on My Keys? – Title of Adam’s next book (ACS)Cunt With A Grunt - Adam's favorite Dr. Seuss book (PM)You'll Never See A Cockroach Jog (PM)Kemo Skinny Calves - Adam's new children's book (ADS)You're Dyslexic And I'm Dumb - Adam and John Popper's collaborative next book (ACS)I Get It If You’re GWAR - Adam's next book (ACS)Bulk Magazine - Costco magazine that Jimmy Kimmell graced the cover of twice (ACS)Do You Have To Take Your Top Off To Dye Your Pubes, Drew? (LL)Glamping With Moriah - Adam's new book (ACS)From The Mouths of Babes (Hot Chicks Not Babies) (ACS)(The) Sweet Spot - Adam's next book (Bryan) (ACS)I Thought Things Would Be Better When I Was Rich (ACS)Radio Station Kitchen (ACS)Post-it Notes In Radio Station Kitchens (ACS)Comedy Club Green Rooms And The Sofas That Were Not Made For Them (ACS)Jethro, the Mexican Jew - A great children's book (Gina) (ACS)Professor and the Construction Worker -The worst children's book ever (ACS)Willie and the Weed - Good name for a children's book (ACS)What Black People Think White People Complain About (ACS)Everyone Eventually Becomes The Man (ACS)Recipe for Misery (1) - Name Of Adam’s next book (ACS)In Defense Of Black Face - Adam’s next book (ACS)Hurry Up And Make Sense (2) - Biography title of the Talking Heads (ACS)Native American NamesChief Thunderbear (LL)Dances With Cocks (ACS)Dances With Lipstick (ACS)Ol' Urethra Windows (ACS)Oxnard - Indian name meaning the balls of a bull (ACS)V/P NamesAbsorbent Rag - Good name for T's V (ACS)Hurt Locker - Another name for T's V (ACS)Judge's Mansion - Another name for T's GCmarket.com - Another name for T's V (ACS)City of Industry - Another name for T's V (ACS)Dutch Mook - Another name for T's V (ACS)s VNo Safe Spaces - Great name for T's V (ACS)Hobo Stove - Another name for A's V (ACS)Sausage Grinder - Another name for A's V (ACS)Dixville Notch - Another name for G's V (ACS)Snake River Canyon - Another name for G's V (ACS)Dakota Access Pipeline - Another name for G's V (ACS)The Holidome - Another name for G’s V (ACS)Discovery Bay - Great name for G's V (ACS)B.O. Box - Great name for G's V (ACS)Sea bag - Good name for G's V (ACS)El Portal - Great name for G's V (ACS)Harry Belafonte - Adam's name for his junk, if he were a woman (Show?)Top Gear - Another name for Adam’s junk (ACS)El Gordo/King Taco - Good name for G’s V (ACS)
Submitted June 02, 2018 at 02:21PM by Texas1971 https://www.reddit.com/AdamCarolla/comments/8o2hxt/carollaisms\_june/?utm\_source=ifttt
via /AdamCarolla
submitted by peterboykin to MagaFirstNews [link] [comments]


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